# A couple of questions and something I am thinking of doing **URL:** \ **Category:** Women's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports\ **Created:** [August 19, 2011, 6:53pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/a-couple-of-questions-and-something-i-am-thinking-of-doing/51896 "2011-08-19T18:53:22Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 3\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![somechick03862](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@somechick03862](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/somechick03862)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 6:53pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/a-couple-of-questions-and-something-i-am-thinking-of-doing/51896/1 "2011-08-19T18:53:22Z")
Hello everyone, I don’t know who everyone is, because I am new here and I don’t know if anyone will even reply! LOL I JUST got my first shipment a few hours ago. I ordered IS and IH, they sent me IHX2! THANK YOU! And a free gift of IO! THANK YOU for that, as well!! Bbefore my questions, I am thinking of testing the IH and IO on my older sister, with whom I have a really rocky relationship with. She is a VERY harsh person much of the time, and I am a total spoil -those- I- love, heart on my sleeve person. I am wondering if this might change how we relate. I have NO expectations, just want to see what it might do for me. Now, to my questions. First, is it wrong of me to use these when my ex-husband is around. We DO NOT get along, he treats me like crap and I am waaaaaaaay past the breaking point. I want to try to improve things, with maybe some IH and IO and maybe use a little IS to make him eat his heart out…how bad of me is that? Also, is it weird to use IS when there will be older male relatives around? I know that people know when it is and when it isn’t appropriate to respond to chemical cues, but is it wiser to apply when NOT in proximity to male relatives? What about group settings when we might want a little IS and there ARE going to be relatives around, is it okay to use then? I know that I have picked up on scents before on a few men in my life. Usually not someone I regularly associate with, but I have gotten a whiff and thought, ’ Ah, pheromones…?"(having heard a lot about them over the years) It was never someone that ‘did’ it for me, and I consciously smelled ‘something’ but never felt compelled to act. So, I can understand how we can get a cue from someone but not abandon our morals or beliefs because of it. It usually just makes me feel very aware of the person when they are near me. Looking forward to trying out the stuff I just got, but not really expecting anything. I think I should have gotten some [Instant Shine](https://a314.com/product/shine/), because I could use the mood lift myself! Going through a rough time right now… ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 7:18pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/a-couple-of-questions-and-something-i-am-thinking-of-doing/51896/2 "2011-08-19T19:18:30Z")
Oh somechick, I am so sorry that you are being treated badly by people close to you! That is unacceptable and hurtful as well! No, it is not wrong to use any of the social products around anyone (social products being Instant Shine, [Instant Openness](https://a314.com/product/instant-openness/), Instant Honesty). You can use them around anyone you like, but make sure to test each one out on its own first so that you know exactly what each one does and how much you need for the best results. This post should help: [How to find your sweet spot...](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/how-to-find-your-sweet-spot/22146) When dealing with unpleasant and negative people, the best thing you can do, difficult as it sounds and can be, is to try to let things “roll off” you, and maintain a smile and happy disposition as much as possible. Pretend it doesn’t bother you at all, or at least don’t let them see that it bothers you. Often, if these people realize that they are no longer “getting to you”, they will stop. ---
**Author:** ![somechick03862](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/278dde/32.png) [@somechick03862](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/somechick03862)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2011, 8:01pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/a-couple-of-questions-and-something-i-am-thinking-of-doing/51896/3 "2011-08-19T20:01:27Z")
Thank you, Sillykitty, I try to let things roll off, but after being the lowest omega around, it gets hard not to let it get to me. My ex-husband is a real jerk and he thinks he is right to act the way he does, because when HE thinks he is right then NO ONE can make him change his mind. He will go on being an ass because he is a spiteful, mean-spirited. self-righteous prig! If I pretend it doesn’t bother me, he will still be an ass…it’s just the way of it. I DO many times let things slide, turn the other cheek, etc or try to kill 'em with kindness. It does work much better with people outside of my family. I will read the thread you recommended when I get home from work tonight!