# Advice for a shy job seeker with depression: what could help me feel confident? **URL:** \ **Category:** Women's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports\ **Created:** [July 10, 2008, 3:48am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238 "2008-07-10T03:48:31Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![ladygrey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@ladygrey](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/ladygrey)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2008, 3:48am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/1 "2008-07-10T03:48:31Z")
I feel a tad bit shy about asking this but, would any of you ladies recommend something to help for this problem. I’m a kinda shy and a person with a severe depression problem. I was diagnosed early in high school when I went from a straight a student to f. When it comes to getting any job I’m never hired your always told to dress well, be commutative and look confident. Any how I will dress the part, smile and talk upbeat but inside I always feel ‘instant failure’. I swear I think people can see though me, I always read how no one wants to hire someone who depressed. I’ve had tons of jobs turn me down even jobs as a server and a target cashier. I’m a good solid honest worker and have been doing side work for all my families friends, normally some room remodeling or any type of house hold repairs. (eh im good with my hands) I have a best friend who radiates joy and happiness, every interview she is hired. She gets fired in about 2-4 months tho always shes goes though multipul jobs a year always fired due to her tardyness, to many days off and suspicious behaviors. (that are often true lol) Anyhow yeah this is my problem maybe someone has an idea of how to make my mood more upbeat. I’m tired of medications to combat my low serotonin levels they do horrible things to your body; lack of sleep, rashes, nausea, vomiting you name it. Before I knew it I had to take 3-4 medications to combat each of the drug side effects. Anti depressants blow and can make you feel more bi polar than happy. Thanks for listening to my ramble hope someone can toss a few ideas. _btw i love everything i have purchased so far very addicted to the mones!_ BTW: I got a free trial of instant shine spray, tried it in a few different places like on my wrists, moved up to my neck, eventually just sprayed it on my face, seems to have no effect on me. _shrug_ I also have IS/B I think I feel a bit more confident and sexy I can defiantly feel the girly in it. A great thing for me since I feel so boyish remodeling bathrooms lol… ---
**Author:** ![Carrie](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/carrie/32/1537_2.png) [@Carrie](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Carrie)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2008, 11:18am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/2 "2008-07-10T11:18:31Z")
Hi Ladygrey, You sound like someone who might benefit more from therapy (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy perhaps) than medications right now, or maybe a combination of the two. Learning how your thoughts influence your emotions and how to take control of them can go a long way in turning around your inner experience, and that in turn enhances the vibe you put out and how others feel around you. In the realm of self-help, a couple of authors I’ve found helpful with this process are Eckhardt Tolle and Byron Katie - anything by them would be great. You can use pheros to augment this positive feedback loop; I’d recommend trying androstenol products like [Instant Openness](https://a314.com/product/instant-openness/). Instant Sexiness A might also be a good one for you. Don’t worry that Instant Shine didn’t give you much self-effect; not everyone is a responder with that one. When you get to advanced status I’d highly recommend MX138 or MX140 (they are part of what’s called the Liquid Sunshine series, GREAT mood enhancers). Good luck Ladygrey, you can turn this around! ---
**Author:** ![inkling](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/inkling/32/2326_2.png) [@inkling](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/inkling)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2008, 11:18am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/3 "2008-07-10T11:18:36Z")
Hi ladygrey, welcome to the forum! 🙂 I wouldn’t suggest trying to replace medications with [pheromones](https://pheromonelabs.com/shop/). A new Dr or a chat with your current might be a good idea to discuss weaning off any medications you’re taking now that are not helping and switching to another. Wearing pheromones may help you to have better results with job interviews though. Instant honesty & instant shine would be a great pairing for your next interview. Instant honesty will give a connected you can be trusted vibe while instant shine makes most people exposed to it feel good. Sorry you’re not feeling instant shine, I don’t either and remember how disappointed I was that it didn’t make me feel great as everyone else had described. Instant openness on the other hand does make me feel pretty good when I wear it. Hope that helps, keep posting we’re a friendly and open group! ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2008, 2:34pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/4 "2008-07-10T14:34:18Z")
I recommend you try downloading “the secret universal mind meditation - Kelly Howell” and put it on just before going to sleep. There’s no harm in trying and I think it could work well for you. ---
**Author:** ![Diatris](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diatris/32/1066_2.png) [@Diatris](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Diatris)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2008, 6:58pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/5 "2008-07-10T18:58:18Z")
Hi there Landgrey and Welcome! We are such complex .,created creatures and it just so happens no one can really know what’s going with u except you. Try being aware of what you react negatively to and why. Retrace your steps and think back as to what occurred around the time you started having these depression problems . I use to have a serious self-esteem problem in highschool mainly because of home life. A friend of mine gave me this book : “The road less travelled” By M Scott Peck but all in all I realised that I had to take life by the horn claim it and make it my own. Remember luv you are special and have so much unleashed potential you just have to start believing it. Ps. U can always PM me if you just need to chat ---
**Author:** ![Kimmie\_D](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kimmie_d/32/1185_2.png) [@Kimmie\_D](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kimmie_D)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2008, 7:45pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/6 "2008-07-10T19:45:54Z")
Hey, LadyGrey! I agree with Carrie. I think you should DEFINITILY try IS/A. It gives you confidence and kind of shields out that shy feeling when interacting with other. It really does. You can get a TOGO bottle & just try it if you want. You really should. Also, the Instant Openess. Out of all the pheromones I have tried, Instant Openess and cops are the ones that work most obviously & apparently. Instant Openess ( at least for me ) makes me feel real cheerful, chatty, not dwelling on things, very positive. i like Instant Shine but, i think Instant openess makes more of a difference in my mood. My bottle is low and won’t spray so i have been putting a few drops right inside my nmose. it really perks you up but, it better to spray it. Also, [Instant Female Magic](https://a314.com/product/instant-female-magic/), that really relaxes you. I would try all 3 of those if i were you. what have you got to lose? 😃 You can get TOGO’s & the refundable if you don’t like them but, i honestly, honestly think these 3 will for you! Good luck!🙂 ---
**Author:** ![ladygrey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/258eb7/32.png) [@ladygrey](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/ladygrey)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 1:42am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/7 "2008-07-11T01:42:00Z")
Thanks much. I think I will try the ‘[Instant Openness](https://a314.com/product/instant-openness/).’ and see what else people might recommend. As for ‘instant female magic’ someone said somewhere it might make you more depressed. I have IS/B seems to work well, can it come with extra confidence lol? Dont think of me as a kid who hates her self and wants to die and stuff. I just have very low confidence. After being rejected by many jobs it dosnt help me job interviews have become a place of fear for me heh. I’ve have been to therapy groups and tried many medications. I’ve learned to cope and detect depression waves, how to make them better and more manageable. However I was just wondering if there was a mone that gives you a upbeat feeling. You know for those lonely days. No ladies here that can say they dont have days where they just want to cry all day think irrationally then you wake up the next day and think, ‘what was that all about’? I think men might notice these days more than women… \>.\> ---
**Author:** ![Kimmie\_D](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kimmie_d/32/1185_2.png) [@Kimmie\_D](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kimmie_D)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 4:45am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/8 "2008-07-11T04:45:18Z")
You could be having a day like that because maybe something that happened in the past or is happening now makes you either sad or angry and it’s on the back-burner but, sometimes just surfaces. Or maybe hormonal or chemical flucuations? I don’t know. Instant female Magic for Women doesn’t make you depressed. The social pheromones like Instant Shine, Instant Openess, Instant Honesty are the same. they are listed under Women & Men but, are the same product & unisex. [Instant Female Magic](https://a314.com/product/instant-female-magic/) has 2 versions. The Female one tends to make MEN depressed so, it’s altered. But, you would get the Women’s version. It has never made me feel depressed. I have certain issues in my life that have cause me anger, sadness & stress but, pheromones never make me feel depressed. just the opposite. If you are looking for a mood brightener, try Instant Shine or the Experimone TAA. But also, I stick by what I already said. IS/A definitly will perk you up & make you feel confident, vibrant & powerful. Instant Openess makes me feel real cheerful. If you have trouble focusing try TAF. I have not tried it yet but, i just ordered it, & that’s what it’s known for. Also, try these but, get out & start doing something that you are really passionate & interested in. i am not trying to preach to you or anything & maybe you already are. I have been depressed before though ( for a reason though not just all the sudden ) & I know how much it sucks. Pheromones are fun & cool & totally valid so, they will help you in whatever your next " project " is. You know, " He not busy being born, is busy dying ". B.D.🙂 Let everyone know what you try or maybe PM Tisha. Good Luck & have fun!🙂 ---
**Author:** ![MyDogDaisy](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mydogdaisy/32/2174_2.png) [@MyDogDaisy](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MyDogDaisy)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 7:28am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/9 "2008-07-11T07:28:01Z")
I know exactly how you feel! I can’t even get a job at McDonald’s, and they seem to hire just about anyone! Some days are definitely better than others though, and one day you will eventually get to the point where you can say “You know what? I’m me, and I’m okay with that.” Trust me sweets, that day will eventually come! Sorry I don’t have any phero advice, I’m new myself, but I just wanted to say you’re not alone in those “shitty me” days, hang in there. ---
**Author:** ![Takhisis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Takhisis](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Takhisis)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 9:19am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/10 "2008-07-11T09:19:07Z")
hi ladygrey, I don’t have anything to add to the suggestions of the other members, since they know a lot more than I do on the subject but I just wanted to chime in on MyDogDaisy’s post. I am sure you’re talented at what you do and a day will come when you get your big break. It may not happen tomorrow (although if it does, it’d be great) but talent rarely goes unnoticed for long. As for feeling boyish, hey, it’s good that you know how to do these things because it makes you stronger and more independent on the long run. I used to feel like a freak as a kid because I could fix my parents’ car as well as a mechanic but couldn’t put any make-up on right. But I realise that it’s just a great money-saver now 😉 Good luck with everything and I hope the pheromones suggested work out for you! ---
**Author:** ![Diatris](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diatris/32/1066_2.png) [@Diatris](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Diatris)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 5:41pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/11 "2008-07-11T17:41:09Z")
[quote=“ladygrey, post:7, topic:15238”] Thanks much. I think I will try the ‘Instant Openness.’ and see what else people might recommend. As for ‘instant female magic’ someone said somewhere it might make you more depressed. I have IS/B seems to work well, can it come with extra confidence lol? Dont think of me as a kid who hates her self and wants to die and stuff. :)Not at all sweetie. I am glad you decided to try out the wonderful products androtics has to offer , just hope you read all the wonderful sticky’s we have available to help you with your ordering. Here are a few if u haven’t already. > [@Womens Pheromone Guide](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/womens-pheromone-guide/4258): > > Revised for 2010/11 Ok ladies here is the start of my pheromone guide you asked for. I will be adding to it but I wanted to post something to get it started. (Mens guide located in the “Pheromone theory” sticky section) When posting about your pheromone experiences please try to add the dose on the bottle. How much you used and where you sprayed it on your body. This makes it easier for Jas and others to figure out what works and what doesnt and why. Due to Androtics no longer being able to … > [@What pheromones can and can't do: realistic expectations for newcomers](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-pheromones-can-do-and-what-they-cant-updated/9558): > > A lot of people come in to the forum and read all the wonderful stories about peoples experiences with [pheromone products](https://a314.com/shop/). New people end up trying them out with high expectations and usually as they get to know the product those expectations are met to some extent and sometimes not because there expectations were to high But I think its best for people to have a realistic view on what exactly they can and can not do. I get a lot of PM’s from people asking me why "they couldn’t get there cheati… 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Kimmie\_D](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kimmie_d/32/1185_2.png) [@Kimmie\_D](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kimmie_D)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 6:36pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/12 "2008-07-11T18:36:31Z")
Hi, Diatris, I just want to ask if the person that said [Instant Female Magic](https://a314.com/product/instant-female-magic/) made them more depressed was a man or a woman. I ask this because I have seen people write they have heard that & I think it is because ( maybe ) people don’t realize that there are TWQ (2) versions of Instant Female Magic, Women’s & Men’s. The WOMAN’S version ON a MAN would make a MAN depressed but, if you’re a WOMAN using the WOMAN’S version you shouldn’t get depressed. At least I don’t but, I guess we’re all different so, there’s a slight 😛 chance I could be wrong. But, if you didn’t know that, I might be right!🙂 ask tisha or someone who is more experienced that has tried it or knows more but, honestly, I am a high-strung, yet prone on dwelling on things type of woman & I have only noticed a subtle, nice calming effect & I have been using it like every day for the past couple of weeks, like 2 or 3 sprays neck face & reapply. I felt I had to defend Instant Female Magic because I don’t think it is a depressant if used correctly. Good Luck!🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Diatris](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diatris/32/1066_2.png) [@Diatris](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Diatris)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 6:59pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/13 "2008-07-11T18:59:41Z")
Oh I have heard that and when I read snooky’s sticky in the men’s forum it’s just for men and he did offer a simple solution to try out just incase so it should be all good. In all my reading I don’t think that pheromones can have a negative effect on you and this from my reading. Still confused as why you think you needed to defend instant female magic though , I can’t remember reading that anyone said it did…did they? That is a cute pic btw… ---
**Author:** ![Kimmie\_D](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kimmie_d/32/1185_2.png) [@Kimmie\_D](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kimmie_D)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 7:35pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/14 "2008-07-11T19:35:26Z")
Thanks! I didn’t mean to sound so serious when I said " defending ". Ladygrey said she had heard the same thing as you & it seemed like maybe you both were thinking that. i just like it alot & wouldn’t want someone not to try it cuz they thought it would be a downer.☹ I love it! 🙂 I have a 4 year old & a almost 1 baby who is into EVERYTHING so I NEED it!😮 ---
**Author:** ![Diatris](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diatris/32/1066_2.png) [@Diatris](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Diatris)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 7:49pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/15 "2008-07-11T19:49:09Z")
Oh I totally understand. I think pheromones get depressing when ppl. just wanna use them and not put the work into it and them expect instant results so they get frustrated that’s why I always recommend reading the sticky’s and asking advice. A four year old and a baby , wow , you must be super-mom I have one and most times i think she has a coffee stash somewhere. ---
**Author:** ![Kimmie\_D](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kimmie_d/32/1185_2.png) [@Kimmie\_D](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kimmie_D)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 8:11pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/advice-for-a-shy-job-seeker-with-depression-what-could-help-me-feel-confident/15238/16 "2008-07-11T20:11:12Z")
I know! My son will not let me leave the room, he is like my little puppy.🙂