# body language question **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [July 7, 2008, 2:44am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771 "2008-07-07T02:44:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![bosshank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@bosshank](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/bosshank)\ **Post date:** [July 10, 2008, 12:34am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/21 "2008-07-10T00:34:56Z")
Warren: Another great way of looking at the situation. Kudos. Habib: Great practical solution. Give him a BIG hint although I think She already has a date set up. ---
**Author:** ![nosemolester](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/nosemolester/32/1782_2.png) [@nosemolester](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nosemolester)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 2:18am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/22 "2008-07-11T02:18:52Z")
Went back to the club just to see him, he works there and I am told that he no longer works there. Spirits tanked. So I decided to make the best of it, I meet 2 girls errrrr and 3 men. When I am not wearing pheros I usualy meet at least 4 men. what gives? Well there goes my project. Guess I just have to regroup. One other thing happen and that is One of the guys I met had almost the same body language as the original guy. His stance was his full face front was facing my side. I think that really does men that “you have my undivided attention” even if I didn’t want it. While I was talking to one of the girls last night, she gave me the full 411 on connecting in Big D. I am looking forward to doing fun stuff this weekend, hopefully my spirits will be lifted. ---
**Author:** ![nosemolester](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/nosemolester/32/1782_2.png) [@nosemolester](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nosemolester)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2008, 2:51am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/23 "2008-07-11T02:51:02Z")
Oh one more thing; Now I know what you all mean when you say DIHL This guy was walking past me really fast, he walks about 3 paces past me and then he stops in his tracks and walks backward turns stares in my eyes and babbles something finally I moved. I learned a couple of lessons 1. pheromones will make people keep talking to you even when you don’t want to talk to them. 2. Don’t stop for gas when you are wearing EoW, the freaks come out in full force. It’s no lie when they say people can smell it from a long ways off. ---
**Author:** ![bosshank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@bosshank](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/bosshank)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2008, 1:00am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/24 "2008-07-12T01:00:10Z")
> [@she](#): > > I learned a couple of lessons > > 1. pheromones will make people keep talking to you even when you don’t want to talk to them. > > 2. Don’t stop for gas when you are wearing EoW, the freaks come out in full force. It’s no lie when they say people can smell it from a long ways off. Yep - I seem to be saying this a lot lately - but the pheromones send their signal out to _everyone_, not just the person you are interested in. Yeah - just ask msselva about the freaks coming out of the woodwork …lol. Hang in there She -it’ll get better. By the way She - interesting avatar. You related Tisha - lol? ---
**Author:** ![Warren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/97f17d/32.png) [@Warren](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Warren)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2008, 3:31am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/25 "2008-07-12T03:31:15Z")
> [@she](#): > > Went back to the club just to see him, he works there and I am told that he no longer works there. Spirits tanked. > > Well there goes my project. Guess I just have to regroup. He promised to take care of you forever. Take him at his word. Go back to the club at a time when things are slow. Find the manager. Even if you already know him, introduce your self and reach out and shake his hand. Press $20 into his palm. (Adjust this amount to suit the neighborhood – twenty bucks holds a manager’s attention around here.) Explain that you know that target-name doesn’t work there anymore, but you need to get in touch with him. You don’t have to explain why – you just gave him money. Now several things can happen. You know they have his contact information, if only to fulfill the legal requirement of sending him his W-2. They may tell you they have to protect employees’ privacy. Be prepared to give them your phone number or email address (or even a stamped envolope) so they can ask him to contact you. This allows them to cover their legal arse. After what he told you, you are not stalking him. You are just upholding your share of the bargain. Afterall he would have exchanged numbers with you previously, if he knew he was going to get canned. If he was as interested in you as you think he might have been – as interested as he said he was, the other employees at the club likely know it. If not the joke is on him. You are a responsible lady. You’ll probably know from the manager’s reaction what the score is. You might be shocked at how helpful they are. If you just put him outta your mind and easily move your interest on to other guys at the club, you’ll look like a slut. OTOH if you make the extra effort to keep in touch – that is loyalty. Men respect that – especially a man who recently suffered a loss. This will let him know you are serious this time in spite of having rejected repeatedly in 1997. So don’t do this if you’re not serious! ---
**Author:** ![nosemolester](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/nosemolester/32/1782_2.png) [@nosemolester](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nosemolester)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2008, 1:12pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/26 "2008-07-12T13:12:20Z")
> [@Warren](#): > > He promised to take care of you forever. Take him at his word. > > Go back to the club at a time when things are slow. Find the manager. Even if you already know him, introduce your self and reach out and shake his hand. Press $20 into his palm. (Adjust this amount to suit the neighborhood – twenty bucks holds a manager’s attention around here.) Explain that you know that target-name doesn’t work there anymore, but you need to get in touch with him. You don’t have to explain why – you just gave him money. > > Now several things can happen. You know they have his contact information, if only to fulfill the legal requirement of sending him his W-2. They may tell you they have to protect employees’ privacy. Be prepared to give them your phone number or email address (or even a stamped envolope) so they can ask him to contact you. This allows them to cover their legal arse. After what he told you, you are not stalking him. You are just upholding your share of the bargain. Afterall he would have exchanged numbers with you previously, if he knew he was going to get canned. > > If he was as interested in you as you think he might have been – as interested as he said he was, the other employees at the club likely know it. If not the joke is on him. You are a responsible lady. You’ll probably know from the manager’s reaction what the score is. You might be shocked at how helpful they are. > > If you just put him outta your mind and easily move your interest on to other guys at the club, you’ll look like a slut. OTOH if you make the extra effort to keep in touch – that is loyalty. Men respect that – especially a man who recently suffered a loss. This will let him know you are serious this time in spite of having rejected repeatedly in 1997. So don’t do this if you’re not serious! good advice, gives me hope. Thanks. ---
**Author:** ![Kitten](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kitten/32/1051_2.png) [@Kitten](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kitten)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 2:08am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/27 "2008-07-14T02:08:49Z")
Let’s see. Get this guy’s address, track him down, and demand to be taken care of forever–because otherwise she will look like a slut for having been flirted on by this odd grieving guy? And give the manager $20 and a stamped envelope to prove her sincerity. Seems like maybe you’ve tried this plan before, Warren. How did it go? 😉 Kitkit ---
**Author:** ![Wolfy](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wolfy/32/965_2.png) [@Wolfy](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Wolfy)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 5:04am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/28 "2008-07-14T05:04:51Z")
> [@Kitten](#): > > Let’s see. Get this guy’s address, track him down, and demand to be taken care of forever–because otherwise she will look like a slut for having been flirted on by this odd grieving guy? And give the manager $20 and a stamped envelope to prove her sincerity. Seems like maybe you’ve tried this plan before, Warren. How did it go? 😉 > > Kitkit She could always wait a couple more weeks, and show up with bloodshot eyes, mascera streaming down her face, and tell the manager she has get in touch with the guy. If he does not provide the contact information she can turn on the crocodile tears, and say it is a very important I contact him. (AKA oops she missed something this month) My guess is there will always be other people, if it is meant to be, he will turn up somewhere sometime. ---
**Author:** ![ariadne](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/ariadne/32/770_2.png) [@ariadne](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/ariadne)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 1:47pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/29 "2008-07-14T13:47:33Z")
> [@woofie2](#): > > She could always wait a couple more weeks, and show up with bloodshot eyes, mascera streaming down her face, and tell the manager she has get in touch with the guy. If he does not provide the contact information she can turn on the crocodile tears, and say it is a very important I contact him. (AKA oops she missed something this month) Now that one’s destined to fail! 🙄 😛 ---
**Author:** ![copycat](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/copycat/32/896_2.png) [@copycat](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/copycat)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2008, 11:40pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/30 "2008-07-14T23:40:53Z")
My two cents Just wanted to toss my two cents out here… I asked a guy friend of mine once why he stands right in front of me and then kinda keeps his head turned to the side a little when he talks. He admitted that 20-some years ago, a photography student he had a crush on said that was his best angle. Shrug. _ **Cat** _ ---
**Author:** ![nosemolester](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/nosemolester/32/1782_2.png) [@nosemolester](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nosemolester)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2008, 1:20am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/31 "2008-07-15T01:20:50Z")
> [@woofie2](#): > > My guess is there will always be other people, if it is meant to be, he will turn up somewhere sometime. I think this is route I am going to take. If I got all of his information and called him it would probably give him the advantage. I am praying and darn near fasting that I would see him again. I know that he owns his own business so I am thinking of asking the bartender for his card and just show up at his shop or near his shop boarding on stalking. I can’t believe I am so hot after this guy. Some one said he used KINO and after a bit of research I am very sure that he did, listen up guys that stuff is VERY effective. I am it and use it. Well I have a no-good-rotten guy on the line that I think is one notch beneath the original target man. He is not DH material and I am really not into flings but I love to play mind games. 😉 🙄 Just being honest. He normally has a string of women he is a very strong ALPHA male. I was totally shocked and surprised to see that after he hugged me he had a woody. ---
**Author:** ![Tealeaves](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tealeaves/32/1293_2.png) [@Tealeaves](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Tealeaves)\ **Post date:** [July 15, 2008, 10:12pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/32 "2008-07-15T22:12:42Z")
> [@copycat](#): > > He admitted that 20-some years ago, a photography student he had a crush on said that was his best angle. That is so cute! 😃 😃 😃 No offense intended Warren, but I think it would only creep him out if she showed up at his doorstep. Maybe it’s just my female point of view, but I would certainly be terrified if a _guy_ I’d met at a bar/club followed me into my real life without me expecting it! Even if She’s TG wouldn’t be put off by _that_ part, I don’t think most guys can really be satisfied with a girl that comes to them so easily. There is something about the ‘hunt’ that most guys both love and hate… and many girls both love and hate being pursued 🙄 We go out of our way to be pursued, for crying out loud. She, I’ve tried the stalking method too. 🆒 LOL! Good luck! Now, Woofie… that sounds like a _much_ better idea. 😛 All we need is some cheap mascara and a crocodile, right? ---
**Author:** ![Kitten](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kitten/32/1051_2.png) [@Kitten](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kitten)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2008, 6:28am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/33 "2008-07-16T06:28:34Z")
Mmmmm. Yeah. The stalking thing was Warren’s plan. But if she’s not in love and is just playing around, who cares if she scares him? If she does, oh well. And if she doesn’t, she has the chance for a very nice time. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Warren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/97f17d/32.png) [@Warren](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Warren)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2008, 5:43pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/34 "2008-07-16T17:43:11Z")
> [@Warren](#): > > If you just put him outta your mind and easily move your interest on to other guys at the club, you’ll look like a slut. We all get nervous when we have to take the initiative to give a relationship a chance. Men push each other: “What have you got to lose” or “She’ll think your gay” or “Don’t be a wussy.” The result is we approach women we are not really interested in. Or with women we are interested in we push too hard and blow it. With women it is the exact oposite. Women get catty and attack and ridcule other women for showing too much interest in a man. I said you might look like a slut if you don’t, in order to balance out the inevitable catty posts that had to come. Nevertheless, the response has been absolutely surreal. I return to the thread and all I see is a screenful of pictures of cats!! > [@she](#): > > good advice, gives me hope. Thanks. What’s the response from other women. Glad you’ve found hope? Good luck? Oh, no!! Envidious attacks. I never suggested showing up unnanounced at his doorstep. I suggested getting his phone number or having his co-workers get yours to him. Since when is exchanging phone numbers (even if through third parties) stalking? Should we throw the Yellow Pages people in prison? Nothing is stalking unless the target expresses a lack of interest. You have the exact opposite of that. This stalking talk is completely unfounded, it is just an excuse to give into cowardice. > [@she](#): > > I think this is route I am going to take. If I got all of his information and called him it would probably give him the advantage. I am praying and darn near fasting that I would see him again. I know that he owns his own business so I am thinking of asking the bartender for his card and just show up at his shop or near his shop boarding on stalking. I can’t believe I am so hot after this guy. I don’t know if this man is good for you or not, She. But he is oviously important emotionally, and that is what relationships are built on – not on logic. You owe yourself the opportunity to find out, the opportunity for _emotional_ learning, if nothing else. If he owns his own business, you have two choices. One, show up and say, “Tom at the club gave me your business address – it’s good to see you again…” Or, two, show up as a customer and go, “Wow, I didn’t realize this was _your_ shop…” Either way two things can happen. He may be elated to see you again and you can thank me for my anti-catty posts. Or you feel hurt and humiliated by his reaction, in which case you quicky put him out of your mind and (more importantly) you put him out of your heart and you move on, open to the affections of a better man. There is the third option. You mope around for the next six months wondering what might have been, you meet your soul mate but are too distracted and cynical to give him the sincere attention he needs and you fail to learn anything of value. One other thing. He didn’t use KINO on you. He touched you. ---
**Author:** ![nosemolester](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/nosemolester/32/1782_2.png) [@nosemolester](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nosemolester)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2008, 10:44pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/35 "2008-07-16T22:44:23Z")
When I researched kino I found him to use most of the kino techniques but he could also be using just regular gestures. One thing I do know for sure is that he flexed his muscles at every single opportunity including standing about 2.5 feet in front of me pumping his bicep as if pretending to be pointing to someone behind him. He also took every opportunity to take up as much floor space as possible to include leaning on the bar with one hand while feet and hips where quit a distance from the bar and his hand on his hip with his elbow pointing in my direction. A friend told me that he might be working at a place not to far from the original spot, so I’ll be looking into it this weekend. Wished I could just instantly wipe my memory of him. :😔: ---
**Author:** ![Wolfy](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wolfy/32/965_2.png) [@Wolfy](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Wolfy)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2008, 2:36am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/36 "2008-07-17T02:36:20Z")
> [@she](#): > > When I researched kino I found him to use most of the kino techniques but he could also be using just regular gestures. some guys are just better and smoother than they realize, Maybe he was wearing some [Male pheromones](https://phero.com/) to make this big of an impact on you 😃 I tend to end up giving a long slow shoulder/back rub, that can turn into a full body massage. ---
**Author:** ![nosemolester](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/nosemolester/32/1782_2.png) [@nosemolester](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nosemolester)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2008, 11:55pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/37 "2008-09-01T23:55:46Z")
WE CROSSED PATHS AGAIN!!! I was cool, real cool. I was wearing EoW covered with Alien. He ask me to come over and talk to him eventually he asked me for my number. Called me bright and early the following morning and asked me to send him my photo. we never did stand directly in front of one another but we talked a really long time. also his wife died almost 2 years ago. ---
**Author:** ![TiggerBear](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tiggerbear/32/1813_2.png) [@TiggerBear](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/TiggerBear)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 2:47am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/38 "2008-09-05T02:47:10Z")
Funny… I remember reading about this stance a couple of weeks ago. Think it’s in one of the books I’m reading now. That perpendicular placement of his body to yours, no matter what his hands are doing or his mouth is saying, is a physical barrier. It may be unconscious, though. It sounds like he’s very interested in you, but torn about getting into anything serious. Whether that’s about guilt of it being too soon after his wife’s death (in his mind), fear of being hurt, fear of being ‘out of practice’, or whatever… ---
**Author:** ![nosemolester](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/nosemolester/32/1782_2.png) [@nosemolester](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nosemolester)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 1:53pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/39 "2008-09-05T13:53:10Z")
> [@TiggerBear](#): > > Funny… I remember reading about this stance a couple of weeks ago. Think it’s in one of the books I’m reading now. That perpendicular placement of his body to yours, no matter what his hands are doing or his mouth is saying, **is a physical barrier**. It may be unconscious, though. > > It sounds like he’s very interested in you, but **torn about getting into anything serious**. Whether that’s about guilt of it being too soon after his wife’s death (in his mind), fear of being hurt, fear of being ‘out of practice’, or whatever… That’s the truth. He loves to run men away from me and he hates to see me on my cell fone. He saw me talking to a guy in the parking lot and he was pacing the parking lot the entire time. I am so anxious about him but I fear he is tooo controlling. Also he never lines up with me face to face. The last time he stood in front of me a bit off to the side. I think he likes to put his biceps in my face. I am going to watch him with other women. ---
**Author:** ![MarkL](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/markl/32/825_2.png) [@MarkL](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MarkL)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 2:09pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771/40 "2008-09-05T14:09:29Z")
Perhaps face-to-face is too confrontational, too intimate / aggressive. I remember being coached to use exactly that position in business meetings as optimum for collaboration – side to side is too wimpy / kindergarten unless the other person is in desperate need of support, while face to face highlights opposition. I say look at his feet. If they are pointing out at 45 degree angle from centerline of his body, he is taking a casual stance and positioning himself to be responsive to you without being too aggressive or shy. Touching the base of your spine is both respectful and flirtatious, subtly sexual. He might think you are out of his class. If the feet are parallel to one another, he’s taking a formal stance that would indicate to me he has a problem interacting: perhaps he puts women on a pedestal or he can’t translate work-style interaction into social-style interaction. His touching you on the base of the spine might then be a sign of a desire to control. Or it might be a sign that his natural attraction to women is … limited … although he might be very interested in you socially or personally. Don’t rely on one glace at how his feet are positioned. Walk away, or make him walk away, and then invite him to approach again and check his foot position as he first arrives next to you, and then, if he touches your spine, when he does so. Repeat if you have the time, and get a few samples to see if his footing is consistent. If not, he may be in a transition period, or he might be seriously conflicted about his approaching you. FWIW, best of luck. [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771.md?page=1) [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/body-language-question/18771.md?page=3)