# Cheated on my girlfriend of 8 months while out of it, how do I get her back? **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [September 27, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106 "2010-09-27T17:46:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 12\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Jstn](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/jstn/32/848_2.png) [@Jstn](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Jstn)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 5:46pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/1 "2010-09-27T17:46:15Z")
I needed to sleep really badly for school so I took sleeping pills but my friends ended up showing up and asked me to go with them in the middle of the night. They got high so I got contact high from being near them and I was exhausted. My friends were telling me my girlfriend cheated on me and has been treating me like shit and to cheat on her. Well I ended up cheating on my girlfriend when I was mad and out of it. I could hardly remember what happened and now my girlfriend is crying and really upset. I’ve been dating her 8 months and shes my first love I really need her back please tell me what to do. Thanks.. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![tacitus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@tacitus](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/tacitus)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 6:58pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/2 "2010-09-27T18:58:43Z")
Don’t cheat on her… this sounds like a dysfunctional relationship. She’s confused. You’re confused. You’re too young and immature to be in a relationship. You should be masturbating as often as you can. Don’t hang out with idiots who do drugs. Especially stupid ass low grade drugs like sleeping pills. That’s how assholes get high. You don’t want to associate with assholes, now do you ? If your chick is so confused or unprincipled as to let other guys stick their dick in her, let her go and make the next guy’s emotional live holy hell. She’ll probably be in rehab in three years time. Clean up you act and get away from fuckups and losers while you still have time to take control of your life and your fate. If your emotional life is too screwed up, demand that you get good professional help from a psychologist. Study hard, like your life depends on it, read good books, don’t drink… alcohol can cause major depression in adolescents, don’t smoke pot… terribly demotivating, you can’t remember shit and your grades suffer… stay away from confused pathetic girls, develop good personal habits, stand up straight, eat clean food, keep your teeth in exquisite condition… don’t try and lose yourself in meaningless internet conversations, get in the habit of reading challenging books and being able to have intelligent conversations, develop useful skills, say what you mean and mean what you say, learn to cook a mean omelette ,take a class in improv comedy, develop a reputation for telling the truth, don’t ever has sex without a condom.. a lot of young guys have “accidentally” become fathers long before they were prepared for the responsibility… realize that most people know at best about 50% of what they are talking about… never be afraid to ask somebody HOW they came to know something and what their hard evidence for that point of view might happen to be… they say she’s cheating on you, ask them HOW they know for sure that that is the truth. ---
**Author:** ![Kelsey](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/kelsey/32/8468_2.png) [@Kelsey](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Kelsey)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:04pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/3 "2010-09-27T19:04:33Z")
> [@tacitus](#): > > Don’t cheat on her… this sounds like a dysfunctional relationship. She’s confused. You’re confused. You’re too young and immature to be in a relationship. You should be masturbating as often as you can. Don’t hang out with idiots who do drugs. Especially stupid ass low grade drugs like sleeping pills. That’s how assholes get high. You don’t want to associate with assholes, now do you ? If your chick is so confused or unprincipled as to let other guys stick their dick in her, let her go and make the next guy’s emotional live holy hell. She’ll probably be in rehab in three years time. Clean up you act and get away from fuckups and losers while you still have time to take control of your life and your fate. If your emotional life is too screwed up, demand that you get good professional help from a psychologist. Study hard, like your life depends on it, read good books, don’t drink… alcohol can cause major depression in adolescents, don’t smoke pot… terribly demotivating, you can’t remember shit and your grades suffer… stay away from confused pathetic girls, develop good personal habits, stand up straight, eat clean food, keep your teeth in exquisite condition… don’t try and lose yourself in meaningless internet conversations, get in the habit of reading challenging books and being able to have intelligent conversations, develop useful skills, say what you mean and mean what you say, learn to cook a mean omelette ,take a class in improv comedy, develop a reputation for telling the truth, don’t ever has sex without a condom.. a lot of young guys have “accidentally” become fathers long before they were prepared for the responsibility… realize that most people know at best about 50% of what they are talking about… never be afraid to ask somebody HOW they came to know something and what their hard evidence for that point of view might happen to be… they say she’s cheating on you, ask them HOW they know for sure that that is the truth. Now I would have tried to be less straight up about it but that is some good solid advice right there. I think we should open up a section for non [pheromone](https://pheromonelabs.com/) advice giving and let you run the show. 😃😃 ---
**Author:** ![Jstn](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/jstn/32/848_2.png) [@Jstn](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Jstn)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:16pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/4 "2010-09-27T19:16:29Z")
> [@tacitus](#): > > Don’t cheat on her… this sounds like a dysfunctional relationship. She’s confused. You’re confused. You’re too young and immature to be in a relationship. You should be masturbating as often as you can. Don’t hang out with idiots who do drugs. Especially stupid ass low grade drugs like sleeping pills. That’s how assholes get high. You don’t want to associate with assholes, now do you ? If your chick is so confused or unprincipled as to let other guys stick their dick in her, let her go and make the next guy’s emotional live holy hell. She’ll probably be in rehab in three years time. Clean up you act and get away from fuckups and losers while you still have time to take control of your life and your fate. If your emotional life is too screwed up, demand that you get good professional help from a psychologist. Study hard, like your life depends on it, read good books, don’t drink… alcohol can cause major depression in adolescents, don’t smoke pot… terribly demotivating, you can’t remember shit and your grades suffer… stay away from confused pathetic girls, develop good personal habits, stand up straight, eat clean food, keep your teeth in exquisite condition… don’t try and lose yourself in meaningless internet conversations, get in the habit of reading challenging books and being able to have intelligent conversations, develop useful skills, say what you mean and mean what you say, learn to cook a mean omelette ,take a class in improv comedy, develop a reputation for telling the truth, don’t ever has sex without a condom.. a lot of young guys have “accidentally” become fathers long before they were prepared for the responsibility… realize that most people know at best about 50% of what they are talking about… never be afraid to ask somebody HOW they came to know something and what their hard evidence for that point of view might happen to be… they say she’s cheating on you, ask them HOW they know for sure that that is the truth. 0.o I don’t do drugs I just hangout with people who do because their popular and get really hot girls and the sleeping pills weren’t illigel my dads a doctor.. lol And my girlfriend hasn’t had sex I’m the only person whose done anything with her and she hardly does anything even with me. She didn’t actually cheat on me it was a lie and I was tired and not thinking when I did what I did. Shes a good girl and I love her. Please actually give me advice on how to fix the relationship ahaha thx though thats good stuff. ---
**Author:** ![P51Mustang](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/p51mustang/32/1266_2.png) [@P51Mustang](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/P51Mustang)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:34pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/5 "2010-09-27T19:34:21Z")
> [@Jstn](#): > > 0.o I don’t do drugs I just hangout with people who do because their popular and get really hot girls and the sleeping pills weren’t illigel my dads a doctor.. lol > > And my girlfriend hasn’t had sex I’m the only person whose done anything with her and she hardly does anything even with me. > > She didn’t actually cheat on me it was a lie and I was tired and not thinking when I did what I did. > > Shes a good girl and I love her. > > Please actually give me advice on how to fix the relationship ahaha thx though thats good stuff. Tacitus is right. The man is golden with his advice. We’ve all been there. Gone down a road where we think that the love of our life is there, and we’re set for life, that all we need is that one person and everything will be ok. In love that I’ve experienced, communication is the key, openness about your relationship is what help keep those bonds together. By you cheating on her after listening to a bunch of morons, says that you didn’t even want to take the time out to find out directly from her. Being vindictive because you got hurt isn’t the way to go about it, what’s it really going to do if you’re hurting the other person. You are 15, there are probably a ton of emotions going on right now. There are probably even more issues going on inside of you. If you’re getting prescribed sleeping medication at 15, I don’t know any doctor that would do that for someone so young. You might want to speak with someone about it. Seeing a psychologist isn’t a bad idea at this point, and I don’t know what kind of advice I can offer right now that would help alleviate issues that seem to be deep seeded. You fit into the category of high risk behavior where you’re impulsive, taking controlled substances, and having a lack of bahavioral control. Trust me, it may seem daunting now, but you better change things around before you end up in a spiral that’s going to keep going and going till you find yourself at the bottom looking up and asking yourself what you did with your life. ---
**Author:** ![Jstn](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/jstn/32/848_2.png) [@Jstn](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Jstn)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:39pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/6 "2010-09-27T19:39:08Z")
Ok thanks but I actually do love this girl it’s not just a thing we’ve been dating almost a year. I take medicine because as I said I have a family of doctors and they apparently know what their doing. I understand what your saying I’m trying not to go down the wrong path it’s just hard. ---
**Author:** ![P51Mustang](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/p51mustang/32/1266_2.png) [@P51Mustang](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/P51Mustang)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:44pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/7 "2010-09-27T19:44:17Z")
> [@Jstn](#): > > Ok thanks but I actually do love this girl it’s not just a thing we’ve been dating almost a year. > > I take medicine because as I said I have a family of doctors and they apparently know what their doing. > > I understand what your saying I’m trying not to go down the wrong path it’s just hard. I understand being in love, and the first love is especially harder. But when things happen beyond repair, that’s it, it is done. There will be plenty more, believe me. I know its hard to look at that now, and the feelings won’t be the same with the next few girls, but that’s how it’s going to be. The hurt of being cheated on is something you can’t escape, no matter how hard you try or say or do, likely, its over. It’s time to move on and lick your wounds. I think what you’re tyring to look for are methods or words that you can say to get her back, and that isn’t the solution for your problem. I know it’s not what you want to hear, but its the reality and you gotta face that. ---
**Author:** ![Weighyoursins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Weighyoursins](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Weighyoursins)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:44pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/8 "2010-09-27T19:44:58Z")
okay man im young to and i feel ya somtimes friends are friends and they do dumb shit n get you n dumb shit…but on the relashonship things all you can do is be upfront about it with her own up to your fuckup like a man dont try to make excuses to here dont be like i didnt MEAN too sleep with her its just happened cuz of all the stuff…you have to be straight n take it like a man be like i slept with this girl i was taking pills n was high but i messed up big time…tell her you still love her and you want a chance to prove it that it meant nothing it was just a big stupid mistake the worst possible one you coulda done and your sorry and you know thats not going to fix things the only way you can fix things is to prove it to her over time ehmmm well thats the jist…and she will either say no or yes to giving you another chance…you have to realize the trust that was there before is gone and it will take a looooong time if ever to get it back most ppl caught cheating n try to work it out usually fall apart after awhile due to the no trust factor im not saying its impossible just laying it out there due to the fact she will always think your cheating on her if you go out without her ehmmm well goodluck bro n btw the chance of her cheating on you has just skyrocketed btw due to she basically has a free pass to the same fuck up now where you wont be able to say nething weighyoursins all men must weigh there sins for every man sins just chose yours wisely and balance those with acts of honor J. ---
**Author:** ![Jstn](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/jstn/32/848_2.png) [@Jstn](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Jstn)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 7:54pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/9 "2010-09-27T19:54:21Z")
I can’t bealieve I did this I love her so much I know your saying don’t make excuses but I just wasn’t myself. ---
**Author:** ![Weighyoursins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Weighyoursins](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Weighyoursins)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:04pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/10 "2010-09-27T20:04:46Z")
yeah i hear ya man all you can do is be straight up with her n tell her u made a mistake n how u feel youll either get back together or not n even if yall do its gonna be rough n hard for it to ever be the same hell hath no furry like a womans scorn good luck i know it sucks but ive been on the receiving end a few times n i know how shes feeling so dont think your feeling worse there are no magic words to fix things just be honest with her n see what happens move on if she says yall are done ---
**Author:** ![Weighyoursins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/5f8ce5/32.png) [@Weighyoursins](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Weighyoursins)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:10pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/11 "2010-09-27T20:10:07Z")
> [@Weighyoursins](#): > > yeah i hear ya man all you can do is be straight up with her n tell her u made a mistake n how u feel youll either get back together or not n even if yall do its gonna be rough n hard for it to ever be the same > > hell hath no furry like a womans scorn > > good luck i know it sucks but ive been on the receiving end a few times n i know how shes feeling so dont think your feeling worse there are no magic words to fix things just be honest with her n see what happens move on if she says yall are done n even if you wernt yourself you put yourself in that position so you have to take responsibilty even if you wernt directly responsible you still lead up to being out of control you didnt have to go out that night you didnt have to sit next to the them when they smoked your choices of ppl and the things you did before lead to it n to realize you were at fault even if you wernt under control of ur actions at the time is what it means to be a man cuz u had some part in losing control ehm dont think i dont know im 19 ive done drugs before drank ect ect n even if you hurt somone while your drinking or doing drugs or whatever else or while at a party instead of being with the girl thats specail to you it was your choices that put you in those positions think of everything in life like a balance scale you put what you want to do and the conciquences on the other side if you can man up to what can possibly happen and take responsibilty then do what you want too ---
**Author:** ![P51Mustang](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/p51mustang/32/1266_2.png) [@P51Mustang](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/P51Mustang)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2010, 8:11pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/cheated-on-my-girlfriend-of-8-months-while-out-of-it-how-do-i-get-her-back/42106/12 "2010-09-27T20:11:50Z")
> [@Please Post Some Things You Wish You Knew eariler](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/please-post-some-things-you-wish-you-knew-eariler/42011/24): > > Prob. the best advice my father ever gave me: **You don’t have to win them all**. The true sigh of a winner isn’t necessarily aggressiveness or intensity at every moment. Too much Alpha for the sake of proving (mostly TO yourself or invisible beings like the ghosts that inhabit your imagination) Alphaness is a ruinous waste of energy. Winners are VERY careful with how they budget their time and energy. About 80% of the human species are total time wasters… they drone on and on and on, mesmerized by the sound of their own voices… Winners instinctively know the power of keeping it short and sweet… Winners know that about 1% of the battles in life are worth the effort and 99% ties you down, burns through your resources, and gets you trapped in strange loops with people who drain you dry. > > _Pick your battles, pick the people you surround yourself with, pick the ideas you engage you mind with, pick the people you listen to, and pick the people you lavish time, energy, and concern on extremely carefully_… > > What might appear to be a charming, amusing, titillating character flaw in a drinking buddy might turn out to be a catastrophic misjudgment in a spouse or business partner. Never, never, ever get seriously involved with anyone who is adept at making excuses, rationalizing questionable conduct, or a little too practiced at throwing up shit storms and acting hurt or offended when you confront them on something that needs confronting. A real deal person will 101% own up to their errors and will get busy making things right… they WON’T tell you how much they MEAN to make things right, or how much they didn’t MEAN to do what they did, or how much they can’t understand “what came over them”, or how the “couldn’t help themselves”… they will immediately set to work MAKING things right and **let their actions speak for themselves**. > > People who can’t face facts or don’t think other peoples rules apply to them or run on about how they’re “only human” after ripping you off or misrepresenting their knowledge or abilities or fucking up a project that they were sure they could learn as they went (on your dime, not theirs, it will mysteriously turn out) or stamp their feet and throw tantrums… etc… only go from bad to worse to total and utter rot… > > Eliminate them as ruthlessly as you would surgically remove a potentially metastasizing cancerous tumor on the brain… > > Learn to read people as carefully as a jeweler weighs and grades a stone. > > Always remember that talk is cheap unless spoken by someone whose words consistently align with their actions. The real words are spoken with money and actions. Please read that post > [@Weighyoursins](#): > > okay man im young to and i feel ya somtimes friends are friends and they do dumb shit n get you n dumb shit…but on the relashonship things all you can do is be upfront about it with her own up to your fuckup like a man dont try to make excuses to here dont be like i didnt MEAN too sleep with her its just happened cuz of all the stuff…you have to be straight n take it like a man be like i slept with this girl i was taking pills n was high but i messed up big time…tell her you still love her and you want a chance to prove it that it meant nothing it was just a big stupid mistake the worst possible one you coulda done and your sorry and you know thats not going to fix things the only way you can fix things is to prove it to her over time ehmmm well thats the jist…and she will either say no or yes to giving you another chance…you have to realize the trust that was there before is gone and it will take a looooong time if ever to get it back most ppl caught cheating n try to work it out usually fall apart after awhile due to the no trust factor im not saying its impossible just laying it out there due to the fact she will always think your cheating on her if you go out without her ehmmm well goodluck bro n btw the chance of her cheating on you has just skyrocketed btw due to she basically has a free pass to the same fuck up now where you wont be able to say nething > > weighyoursins > all men must weigh there sins > for every man sins > just chose yours wisely > and balance those with acts of honor > J.