# Dating advice.... food for thought ladies... PLS **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [October 5, 2009, 9:02am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010 "2009-10-05T09:02:28Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![REEPER6969](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/reeper6969/32/2133_2.png) [@REEPER6969](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/REEPER6969)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 9:02am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/1 "2009-10-05T09:02:28Z")
I’m in need of assistance of what to do. Have not been dating much. Actually not at all. It’s been many years now since my last girlfriend. I most of the time have been going out practically everywhere on my own. Just been checking out different bars that I don’t normally go to. Not much luck there either. It’s hard to do so when you don’t have a trusty “wing man/woman”. The reason being of me going out on my own, if you readers are wondering… Most of my friends or so called aquaintances are so into there so called comfortable life, playing the so called "wating game : they will come if you wait ", bunch of flakes : they tell you to call’em and don’t call you back. The only people that I consider friends either have a significant other already, or married, which is only the few. I work in a male domitated work force. So from some, to no friends that I hang around with. So, I really don’t take the time anymore to waste my time or texting to even get a hold of any of them. Come on man, I can’t hang out with the dudes anytime!!! The ladies come and go… What a bunch of idiots!!! What I’m really trying to find out is what to do? Where to go, to mingle? I’m ok with going out on my own and all but, the “loneliness” and feeling depressed can hit you hard from time to time. Been doing it for quit a few years now. I know most of the singles are into the night life most of the time where I currently live, mostly is at the clubs or bars. But, I get a lot of the “nah it’s not a good place to find dating material”. Which is true. But so far with my luck I’ve been lucky in the past. I prefer to keep my location where I reside discreet. What is there to do when you are out on the mingle on your own. Which I find it extremely hard. I don’t know though, might just be me. I would really want to find more dates to expand my options but you know, what? Kind of hard to have options when you have a big fat 0 to that number. So ladies… also gents, Lots of help would much be appreciated. What to dooo what to doo… 😕 Now: 28M Single Asian----Yeah and sadly single… ---
**Author:** ![Wrlprchnx](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wrlprchnx/32/1360_2.png) [@Wrlprchnx](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Wrlprchnx)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 2:53pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/2 "2009-10-05T14:53:59Z")
Cheer up bud - Your not in as bad a shape as you think. Here is my 100% effective method for meeting new people… ## Find a social hobby. No really, find something that you think you will enjoy and requires you to go to classes, or workshops, or something where other people who enjoy that hobby will be. Do it! Sports Teams work great as well - If you aren’t sporty… no worries - Slo-Pitch doesn’t require actual athleticism, Ultimate is a great social sport and most leagues have beginner tiers (both are CO-ED!). Hell, there are a ton of co-ed Bowling leagues or Curling leagues out there as well. My personal favorite - Ballroom Dance Classes (read: Salsa), there is probably a dance studio that holds walk-up beginner classes… just show up - I can assure you that you will meet people if you keep up at it. They are also hella fun and the skills you acquire are the kind that totally impress ladies. Try speed dating - It’s actually alot of fun if you don’t take it too seriously… ---
**Author:** ![moonwhisper](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonwhisper/32/1735_2.png) [@moonwhisper](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/moonwhisper)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 3:33pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/3 "2009-10-05T15:33:45Z")
Seriously, Wrlprchnx is right. You need to figure our what you enjoy and want to spend time doing, and then join a group of people who do that sort of thing. You’re bound to meet people who have common interests, or else they wouldn’t be involved with that group. This immediately gives you common ground that you’re not going to necessarily have with someone you met in a bar. And it gives you a conversation topic to fall back on when things start to lag. More importantly, though, is the fact that you’re pursuing what you love to do, not changing yourself to conform to others just because you’re lonely. ---
**Author:** ![REEPER6969](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/reeper6969/32/2133_2.png) [@REEPER6969](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/REEPER6969)\ **Post date:** [October 5, 2009, 9:42pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/4 "2009-10-05T21:42:51Z")
Thanks a bunch you two. I’ll probably take that up. Gotta find some kinda other different approach. Figured that there was something I was not doing. Thanks again. Keep on comming with the suggestions/advice. The more the better. Always could use more and many different approaches. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![meow333x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecae2f/32.png) [@meow333x](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/meow333x)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2009, 2:00am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/5 "2009-10-09T02:00:23Z")
look into coffee shops. they have tons of shit going on and the people are friendly. there’s one in my town that hosts salsa lessons and live music. you can imagine how easy it is to meet women like that…dance with them during the lesson, then go up and talk to them when the band is playing. ---
**Author:** ![hohohate](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/hohohate/32/2429_2.png) [@hohohate](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/hohohate)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2009, 5:56pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/6 "2009-10-09T17:56:59Z")
Just do whatever you find interesting. I’m sure at one point you will run across a girl who shares your interests or just around. ---
**Author:** ![REEPER6969](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/reeper6969/32/2133_2.png) [@REEPER6969](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/REEPER6969)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2009, 5:53am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/7 "2009-10-10T05:53:02Z")
Hmm thanks H, and Meow. That’s another thing I can look into. Too bad though not much like that happens here Where I’m at. Just clubs n bars. Coffee shop, so so. Dancing classes or what not are most like for the older folks that I have research into. Lets see… Well that’s about it. Too bad I’d prefer to keep my preference on the DL. Sorry ya’ll. It’s a small world and I just somehow still run into people I don’t need to. 🙂 hah!!! I’ll keep on going at it though. There’s no way I’m giving up that easily… sadly I’m still going… hahaha… Keep it comming… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![meow333x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecae2f/32.png) [@meow333x](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/meow333x)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 12:21am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/8 "2009-10-12T00:21:54Z")
> [@REEPER6969](#): > > Hmm thanks H, and Meow. That’s another thing I can look into. Too bad though not much like that happens here Where I’m at. Just clubs n bars. Coffee shop, so so. Dancing classes or what not are most like for the older folks that I have research into. here’s the thing tho…something i had to learn the hard way…no matter where you go or what you do…it all comes down to social skills. if you have good social skills you can meet women at a grocery store. if you have bad social skills, then speed dating won’t even get you any results. work on that first…then worry about this other stuff. and also…the biggest mistake you can make in the dating game is to ask women for advice. you wouldn’t take your car to a plumber would you? then why would you ask a women about picking up a woman? seriously man i’m talkin from experience. i’ve made myself look like a complete dumbass because i’ve listened to women’s advice. i’ve already taken that bullet for you, so you don’t have to. ---
**Author:** ![REEPER6969](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/reeper6969/32/2133_2.png) [@REEPER6969](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/REEPER6969)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 12:45am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/9 "2009-10-12T00:45:51Z")
😃 lol… thanks there M. So true, so very true. I’m usually very chatty once I warm up to someone. Too bad though. Need to try working on my “cold” approaches, so to say with people. Never really worked with this skill too much… hahaha… I hear that it is a start for some. Thanks again.😃 > [@meow333x](#): > > here’s the thing tho…something i had to learn the hard way…no matter where you go or what you do…it all comes down to social skills. if you have good social skills you can meet women at a grocery store. if you have bad social skills, then speed dating won’t even get you any results. work on that first…then worry about this other stuff. > > and also…the biggest mistake you can make in the dating game is to ask women for advice. you wouldn’t take your car to a plumber would you? then why would you ask a women about picking up a woman? seriously man i’m talkin from experience. i’ve made myself look like a complete dumbass because i’ve listened to women’s advice. i’ve already taken that bullet for you, so you don’t have to. ---
**Author:** ![Wolfy](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wolfy/32/965_2.png) [@Wolfy](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Wolfy)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 4:41am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/10 "2009-10-12T04:41:56Z")
Book stores and libraries, but you have to worry about being the creepy guy hanging around all the time. my best friend met his wife at a local bookstore. (he went in on saturday afternoons and read) online dating sites, are a good way to interact with people, as I met my current girlfriend on there, actually I met her friend on there and then we met. The free sites seemed to get more people and were more interesting than walking up to a cashier at the local dry-goods store ---
**Author:** ![moonwhisper](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonwhisper/32/1735_2.png) [@moonwhisper](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/moonwhisper)\ **Post date:** [October 12, 2009, 3:24pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/11 "2009-10-12T15:24:05Z")
> [@Wolfy](#): > > Book stores and libraries, but you have to worry about being the creepy guy hanging around all the time. > my best friend met his wife at a local bookstore. (he went in on saturday afternoons and read) This could never have worked for me. Once I get my nose in a book, I’m gone. I hardly notice anything around me, or even people talking to me. ---
**Author:** ![REEPER6969](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/reeper6969/32/2133_2.png) [@REEPER6969](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/REEPER6969)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2009, 7:43am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/12 "2009-10-13T07:43:47Z")
> [@moonwhisper](#): > > This could never have worked for me. Once I get my nose in a book, I’m gone. I hardly notice anything around me, or even people talking to me. hehe… yes yes, that’s also true. I also can tend to find a good read then I’m just hooked. All great suggestions and advices all. Not one bad one here… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Wolfy](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wolfy/32/965_2.png) [@Wolfy](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Wolfy)\ **Post date:** [October 13, 2009, 4:12pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/dating-advice-food-for-thought-ladies-pls/33010/13 "2009-10-13T16:12:40Z")
Volunteering is a good way to meet people too, Working with an origination to do something especially through the holidays, or year-round. A roommate got more phone numbers as a salvation army bell ringer outside the local Wal\*Mart. A female friend met her husband through BigBro’sBigSisters or united way events. spending time working with church groups, Habitat for humanity, or other light volunteering would work too. A friend said prenatal classes were a good place to meet women too, at least you know they put out. 😃