# diamond's journal "clinging on to the wreckage" **URL:** \ **Category:** Men's Journals\ **Created:** [October 7, 2008, 10:58am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976 "2008-10-07T10:58:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Wrlprchnx](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wrlprchnx/32/1360_2.png) [@Wrlprchnx](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Wrlprchnx)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 1:40pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/61 "2009-05-08T13:40:59Z")
Sorry to hear it couldn’t work out bud I get the impression that this is something of a relief (which I totally understand) - Here is to hoping the single life treats you well! (Now I gotta figure out how to get myself sent out to the UK for fan testing… hrmmm) ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 2:06pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/62 "2009-05-08T14:06:35Z")
Thanks for the support guys, it is truly appreciated but, honestly, I’m happier now than I have been for a long time. wrlpchnx, get over here, we’ll paint the UK red. boss, if Xiphoid and emmie have the slightest sense, they’ll be hiding 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Xiphoid](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/xiphoid/32/1852_2.png) [@Xiphoid](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Xiphoid)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 6:41pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/63 "2009-05-08T18:41:47Z")
> [@diamond](#): > > Thanks for the support guys, it is truly > boss, if Xiphoid and emmie have the slightest sense, they’ll be hiding 😉 Darn…I’ve never been any good at hide & seek 🙄 D…I’ll email you back tomorrow ---
**Author:** ![Lowtek](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lowtek/32/1788_2.png) [@Lowtek](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lowtek)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 8:23pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/64 "2009-05-08T20:23:41Z")
Great read Diamond . . . you will get back on track I’m sure . . . I’m not sure what to expect out of these phero paints myself - but it’s only been one week and there’s something bubbling already. Barcelona sounded great . . . I spent 20 days there after I graduated from college, locked up in a room with two amazing girls most of the time. ~jk ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 9:16pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/65 "2009-05-08T21:16:49Z")
Barcelona was great, definitely at the top of my list of places to go back to. 2 girls, 20 days, now a hot brazilian chasing you, you make me sick 😃 Hmm, any ladies on here fancy a trip? Oh dear, looks like diamond is back on form 😛 ---
**Author:** ![bosshank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@bosshank](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/bosshank)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 1:34am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/66 "2009-05-09T01:34:32Z")
> [@diamond](#): > > boss, if Xiphoid and emmie have the slightest sense, they’ll be hiding Well, Xiphoid answered and is emailing Diamond. 😉 I saw Emmie in here earlier today. So she either _is_ hiding or sent Diamond an email. 🙄 Looks like Diamond is back on form as advertised. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 12:02pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/67 "2009-05-09T12:02:13Z")
diamond is back on form, of that there is no doubt. However, diamond has to find a job and somewhere to live first.😮 Now, despite Xiphoids begging, I’m not quite prepared to be chained to her bed on a permanent basis just yet. oh and she really shouldn’t wear MX250 when playing hide and seek, that trail was just too easy to follow 🙄 ---
**Author:** ![AlexanderG](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/alexanderg/32/891_2.png) [@AlexanderG](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/AlexanderG)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 1:30pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/68 "2009-05-09T13:30:43Z")
Diamond, I just read your entire journal. I am sorry to read you will be calling it quits with your wife. Do you think there is still a chance you can both rescue this? Also, can I ask how did your clavicle mend? Did it require surgery or did they just prescribe a sling or figure8 support? ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 1:37pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/69 "2009-05-09T13:37:58Z")
> [@AlexanderG](#): > > Diamond, I just read your entire journal. I am sorry to read you will be calling it quits with your wife. Do you think there is still a chance you can both rescue this? > > Also, can I ask how did your clavicle mend? Did it require surgery or did they just prescribe a sling or figure8 support? Thanks AG, there’s probably about a 20% chance that we could rescue this if we both wanted to ( neither of us particularly want to as we aren’t the same people we were 6 years ago), equally there’s an 80% chance that we end up hating each other and arguing in front of the kids. The obvious choice is the one we have come to. Don’t get me wrong, we still love each other, but as friends, we are no longer ‘in love’ with each other. Clavicle has repaired but, as there’s now a slight curvature, it does tend to pull on the shoulder joint a little which causes some discomfort. No surgery required, despite Xiphoid’s offer to open me up with a bread knife and have a look 😉 ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 8:21am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/70 "2009-05-11T08:21:32Z")
OK, new life, new start, new journal. Take a dead animal, bury it in a swamp and leave it, eventually, some of it becomes a carbon based fossil fuel, coal. Now, if you subject that lump of coal to the right amount of heat and pressure over a period of time, it becomes something different yet still fundamentally the same. It becomes a rough diamond, a rather insignificant glassy looking piece of rock. That is quite a good analogy for my life up to now. Time now, to move things on a stage further. Take that rough diamond, place it in the hands of experts and allow them to take the rough edges off, shape it properly and polish it until it achieves full potential. The result is a fascinating stone of unsurpassed quality that is seen as the pinnacle of achievement in so many ways and is virtually guaranteed to make a lady go weak at the knees when introduced to her in the proper manner. Oscar speech time. I would like to thank each and every one of you who has helped me with my journey so far, everyone at Androtics,Tisha, Steve but perhaps most importantly, the users of this forum, many of whom I have never PM’d or had a discussion with but have been more of a support than you will ever know. To quote Lee Trevino " _The biggest distance I have ever encountered on a golf course is the six inches between my ears_" In other words ladies and gents, get your mindset in the right place and you will win whatever game you are playing, if you add the pheromonal edge you will be truly unstoppable. I believe in you, time to believe in yourself 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Tigerlilly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tigerlilly/32/2257_2.png) [@Tigerlilly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Tigerlilly)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 4:11pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/71 "2009-05-11T16:11:00Z")
Well said, my man. You are exceptional in every way. 🙂 Congrats, good luck and God Speed on your new life and journey. … now get your butt over to California, quick. There’s beaches and bikini’s galore, not to mention a thriving economy. ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2009, 9:36pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/72 "2009-05-11T21:36:47Z")
> [@Tigerlilly](#): > > Well said, my man. You are exceptional in every way. 🙂 > > Congrats, good luck and God Speed on your new life and journey. > > … now get your butt over to California, quick. There’s beaches and bikini’s galore, not to mention a thriving economy. Thanks TL, but I’ve got to sort priorities and right now, the job is the biggie. Got a hint of some work based out of Riyadh that is worth considering plus a couple of possibles over here. Californian beaches sound good though, pity I look awful in a bikini! To whoever repped me in this thread today, thanks for your wonderful comments, raised a smile at the end of a long day. X ---
**Author:** ![bosshank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@bosshank](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/bosshank)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 5:01am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/73 "2009-05-12T05:01:24Z")
> [@diamond](#): > > Thanks TL, but I’ve got to sort priorities and right now, the job is the biggie. I always say its a shame how work can get in the way of the rest of my life. > [@diamond](#): > > Got a hint of some work based out of Riyadh that is worth considering … Sounds like the old line of work … > [@diamond](#): > > pity I look awful in a bikini! Well if you get yourself looking good in a bikini again it would open up a few more lines of work for you … lol. 😮 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Tigerlilly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tigerlilly/32/2257_2.png) [@Tigerlilly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Tigerlilly)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2009, 3:36pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/74 "2009-05-12T15:36:36Z")
i agree, doesn’t sound much like lawyering to me… 😉 ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2009, 8:54pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/75 "2009-05-15T20:54:21Z")
[P74](https://pheromonelabs.com/product/p74/) test ( 15 mcg, unfragranced) Day 1 Monday evening, College classroom, 20 degrees Celsius/68 fahrenheit, distances from 2 – 8 feet. Plus car trip 20 minutes each way. Single spray 1 hour before class, pick up regular female passenger at 5:30. Usual banter on the way with (now) regular giggle session from her, no major out of the ordinary incidents to report on the way but she seems slightly less flirtatious than normal. No self effects noticed but feeling relaxed and calm, as opposed to my normal, slightly manic self, not sure if this is due to the P74 or the big stress relief of this past weekend’s marriage terminating discussion with the wife. During the class, the atmosphere was noticeably less manic and hysterical than normal. Normally, it is very easy to reduce this class to chaos within 20 minutes, tonight, although the atmosphere was subdued from it’s normal level, it was still somewhere above that to be expected of a group of adults studying a law course. The trip home was slightly more eventful, discussion wise, not physically. My passenger appeared to be more open and willing to talk about intimate subjects, including revealing that she had recently had a bisexual experience with her friend that her partner ( and father of her three children) knows nothing about. Now I know my Meyers Briggs score indicates that I should be a counselor but this is ridiculous. I throw in a bit of banter and pretend blackmail along the lines of ‘ keep me happy and I’ll keep quiet’ to which the reply was ‘ you wouldn’t, oh please no, you’re too nice a guy to play those games. Now, if I contrast this with the same girls reaction to MX275, it is blatantly apparent that MX275 has something arousing in it that P74 alone cannot match. However, the level of trust that she displayed when exposed to P74 on a relative stranger ( I still don’t know her surname) was enough to raise an eyebrow. She is away next week but, just for shits and giggles, the week after will see 15mcg P74 and 15mcg straight none combined. Day 2 Wednesday Different college class, more serious, larger room but atmosphere on a par. 45 mcg applied at 5:00, wife gives me a lift and the atmosphere in the car is noticeably lighter than the darkness I was feeling earlier this afternoon, yep, even diamond gets a downer when he realizes he is getting divorced for the second time in 8 years. I can actually feel the moment that the P74 kicks in on me, at precisely the same moment the wife told me to go and flirt with the girls in class ( she knows about and has read my previous reports). I am starting to form the opinion that P74 self effects are steered in a big way by my own emotional state, when I was down, it was seriously dark, the last time I was there, it took a month or two of antidepressants to get me out. One comment of release from the wife and P74 and nothing mattered any more, the world was a bright place and I set off on my mission to flirt outrageously. Cheeky tests to Miss “ I’ve got a boyfriend but I so would…” ( let’s call her S) who I had deliberately sat opposite, her body language ( 15 feet away) was good, eye contact, hair twirling, when the legs were crossed, the feet were pointed at me, when the skirt rode up no attempt was made to smooth it down. I also noticed significant eye contact and smiles from two of the girls who reacted well to MX275. Even Mrs “ I can’t stand this guy” gave me a grin for the first time in 9 months. I had earlier in the day asked S for a lift home so knew that the trip back should be a giggle if nothing else. Again, big comfort, past mistakes discussed by her openly, including the fact that she is dumping her (younger) boyfriend when he goes to college this summer, he is her first and she thinks he should learn what he is doing with more than one woman. Invited out for her birthday tomorrow night, unfortunately I have got to look after the kids ( wife away until 9pm) so no go, instead she rings a friend of ours who runs a pub and jacks up a party for next week, just so I can go along!! I thank her ( jokingly ) for the ego boost, at which point she turned, said “ no, thank you, I feel like a woman again and will repay you sometime in the near future!” Tomorrow I have a day all to myself for the first time in months, kids at grandmas, she who must no longer be obeyed is away all day and Arsenal are playing Man U. Hmm, I reckon 60mcg and a trip to the pub might prove to be a suitable test!😃 ---
**Author:** ![pherophreak](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/pherophreak/32/1531_2.png) [@pherophreak](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/pherophreak)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2009, 10:14pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/76 "2009-05-18T22:14:35Z")
“I feel like a woman again” GEEZ ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2009, 2:51am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/77 "2009-05-19T02:51:22Z")
It gets even better. Despite agreeing to separate, wifey still couldn’t be honest. Guess what, she’s getting texts from another guy signed I love U X Woohah, all the artillery has now switched to my side 😃 ---
**Author:** ![diamond](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/diamond/32/859_2.png) [@diamond](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/diamond)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2009, 11:12am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/78 "2009-05-19T11:12:17Z")
Day 3 (Saturday) was supposed to be a continuation but for various reasons, I threw on 4 drops A314 (batch 18 akuto) and 60mcg P74 all to the wrists and stroked across neck and went to the pub to watch the match. At the pub there was nothing much to report, I maybe had a little more room at the bar than I would otherwise have done but there was no obvious deference whether I was putting out a positive vibe or when I deliberately put out a bad one. Then again, most people were concentrating on the game. At half time I walked up the road a couple of hundred yards to another pub which had precisely three people in it including the landlord. Scratch that then. Back home for a coffee, then decide to up the ante a little. It has so far been one of the worst weeks of my life so I decided to pherobomb the local supermarket. It was now about three hours after original application so I decided against refreshing but added 15mcg straight none to the back of my neck and 2 sprays of 4x Honesty to my hair. Mentally, I went from slightly miserable soon to be single man to 10 foot tall chisel jawed porn star after he has just satiated Angelina Jolie, Liv Tyler and Lucy Liu! I was a god and felt invincible. I stopped off at the tobacco counter and the young girl ( 18/19, slim brunette) who served me was obviously flustered within a few seconds ( I had been in the queue around a minute beforehand, some 6 feet from her). Now, I’ve dealt with this girl several times previously and, whilst she is always happy and polite, this was different. Her face visibly flushed, her hands were shaking when she got the tobacco from the shelf and she managed to drop it twice over the huge distance of 4 feet. As she handed it to me, I made a point of extending my index finger to touch hers. She visibly flinched as if electrocuted and apologized before giggling, a bit of banter and, as I left, I saw her bite her lip hard. Around the supermarket, there was nothing exceptional, a couple of minor hits but nothing that couldn’t be put down to attitude rather than pheromones. Difficult one to pin down, was it the mix that was so ‘hot’, was it the mere fact that I’m no longer wearing a wedding band, was it my new found attitude and confidence or, as I suspect a combination of all three with the pheros, although only assisting, actually being the catalyst that kicked everything else off? However, after I got home, the none was obviously still working, discussion about minor matters regarding separation became major as I got increasingly stroppy, argument became heated and I think I may have had my first bout of none rage, mind you, given the current climate, we are both stressed. Sunday, day of rest Monday, phero free day but college in the evening, last but one session of the year so time for some more carpet bombing fun! 2 x double ammo to the neck, 4x Honesty to the hair and 3 drops A314. Drive to college, it’s cancelled. Back home, wife wants fish and chips so I divert to the shop. Yet another teenage girl hit. The girl serving me is too busy talking to me and looking at me to see what she is doing and burns her hand. Again, a bit of negging and her friend comes to see what the laughter is. I point out that she was too busy flirting with me to concentrate. She denied it with a smile but I caught them both watching me as I walked out to the car. This was around 90 minutes after application. Went to the pub later in the night, only about 10 people, all men apart from barmaid who I had never met before, introduced myself but she appeared uncomfortable around me all night. Local soccer hooligans came in, chap next to me warned me that they were notoriously violent, within 10 minutes we were swapping jokes and comparing tattoos. Not the sort of people I wish to associate with but, if the pheros make these encounters smoother, I’m not complaining. Way too much beer, bit of flirting with 28 yo brunette barmaid but she is not responding to this mix, might try dropping the none a little or ramping up the socials. Overall, a good basic ‘confidence’ mix for me which seems to generate predominantly good vibes in other people. I like this going back to the consumer line game, apply it, forget it and the hits are more obvious than with P and MX series. The one thing I will say is that I am not wearing any more androstenone until I’ve moved out of the house, it’s gonna be IFM all the way for the next three days ---
**Author:** ![Tigerlilly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tigerlilly/32/2257_2.png) [@Tigerlilly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Tigerlilly)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2009, 5:12pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/79 "2009-05-20T17:12:53Z")
… I see your signature has changed… ---
**Author:** ![Tigerlilly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tigerlilly/32/2257_2.png) [@Tigerlilly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Tigerlilly)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2009, 5:16pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976/80 "2009-05-20T17:16:00Z")
Now wait just a damn minute… > [@diamond](#): > > **…within 10 minutes we were swapping jokes and comparing tattoos.** You didn’t mention that before! Spill! What have you? 🙂 [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976.md?page=3) [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/diamonds-journal-clinging-on-to-the-wreckage/20976.md?page=5)