# I keep attracting older chicks (and it's kind of annoying) **URL:** \ **Category:** Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports\ **Created:** [November 16, 2009, 7:15pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133 "2009-11-16T19:15:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![joblo1986](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@joblo1986](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/joblo1986)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 7:15pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/1 "2009-11-16T19:15:09Z")
Well the title explains it. I am just wondering why this is happening, and what I can do to shift the age group down to my age. I am 23, and the girls I attract are 30-35, which I’m really not that into. Originally I thought it was from wearing IG, but a couple night ago I think I disproved that. I had sprayed 1 shot of IG to the hair, and split one drop of A314 behind the ears prior to a job interview (which, by the way, landed me an offer a few hours later for exactly the $ I wanted) earlier in the day. That was approximately 12 HOURS before going out later that night. I went to a bar with my brother-in-law to play pool (we live together). I ended up drinking a few pitchers to myself, which wasn’t what I had planned, but I wasn’t planning on picking up chicks either, so who cares? As I walked in the bar, I did my usual routine, and spotted the cutest girl I could find and tried to make eye contact with her. The cutest girl happened to be a 32 year old brunette with a decent face, but I probably wouldn’t put her past a 6 (though I’m not fond of the rating system but at least you have some basis to go on). She looked at me, and I locked eye contact from about 10 feet away and held it until she smiled, then I smiled and turned to the bartender to make my order and get some pool balls. I had no interest in this girl, but it’s something I do when I enter a bar I guess just to establish some sort of presence. After my order, I didn’t look or talk to her, and ignored her the rest of the time. After a couple hours of pool we decided to leave. I went up to the bar to pay my tab, and the girl pops up out of nowhere next to me and starts hitting on me harder than I am used to getting from girls - kinoing, placing her hand over mine, staring into my eyes with a look that I could only describe as… desire? She noticed I was leaving and was trying to reel me in before I left. It was very offputting to me, so I made a bit of small talk, tried not to act akward, and we bailed. Got back home, reallized I wasn’t tired, my sister was being bitchy, and I really wasn’t ready to end the night, so we went back out to shoot pool some more. Tried another bar but they only have a couple tables and it was crowded, so went back to the dive where we started. I thought the way I blew the chick off she would leave me alone, but not the case. I was VERY drunk at this point, but we got another pitcher anyway. As I walked in, I did the same thing as earlier with another chick at the bar, probably also a 6 and around 30. Locked eye contact, she smiled, I smiled, I got my alchohol and walked away. I think of it as innocent flirting, and as long as I don’t approach them, they aren’t going to do anything either. Well, for the rest of the time we were there I had both of these girls constantly jockeying for my attention, which I was trying not to give either of them. I mean, don’t get me wrong, it was fun. At one point, when I was about too drunk to talk right, the first chick sat down next to me and I made out with her for a bit. My drunken line of thinking was she wouldn’t talk that way. But then I told her I wasn’t going to do anything with her, and that she should leave me her number for later. She got up pissy and stormed away back to her table, and I went back to ignoring her. A few minutes later the guy who was hitting on her friend came over and begged me to pull her away so he could hook up with her friend. Then her friend came over to talk to me to get me to go talk to her, and when she got there, she started hitting on me with that same weird look in her eyes. Then the dude came back over and threw me the girls number written on a napkin. Then the other chick I flirted with came over for about the fifth time to talk, and was touching my face and ended up kissing me on the forehead. None of which I remembered until my brother in law reminded me the next day. The annoying part of all this is that I don’t have this affect on younger girls, or girls I am at least attracted to. This isn’t the first time this has happened recently. It seems every time I go out with my brother in law it is a similar experience, with or without [pheromones](https://a314.com/) (there’s really no discernable difference for me yet). I mean, it’s fun in a weird way to be the center of attention for girls you have no interest in, but not productive for me. So after telling that story, what I am wondering is - what am I doing to make this happen? I don’t usually approach girls, though I will flirt with them with my eyes/smile. Younger girls too. In fact this same night there was a super cute pool shark chick I flirted with a bit, but she didn’t approach, even though I got good eye contact and a big prolonged smile. Is it that the better looking ones will leave you alone until you initiate something, whereas the older or less attractive ones aren’t getting the attention so they have to go out and approach guys themselves? I don’t know because the chick I made out with had a couple guys who were interested in her and were hitting on her. Is it just the way I flirt with them that I am intriguing so they HAVE to come say something? I’m trying to figure this out because I am newly single, and new the the pick-up scene. Not sure that I have any interest in being a PUA, but I am taking a great deal of interest recently in the way humans - particularly opposite sexes - interact. I should maybe mention another weird thing that happened this night, as maybe it’s relavent. One of the times I went up to the bar, and ran into this big (about 6’2", I’m guessing around 230 lbs) redneck looking guy. I’m about 5’11" and 175 lbs - not a big guy. I said “hi” and he said something to the people he was talking to about how everyone is afraid of him. Then he turned back to me and said he was an ex-marine, and asked if I ever served, and I said “no, but my brother in law just got out of the marines a couple months ago” and invited him to come talk. My brother is a very dark skinned guy. Well the redneck guy walks up to him, talks for about 10 seconds, then turns back to me, and for some reason I, the uninteresting guy, become the center of attention. I notice the guy moving closer to me, and I hold eye contact with him for the entire time we are talking, until I notice he is standing about 6 inches from me and trying to stare me down. But rather than show that I was intimidated by him, which I was, I kept eye contact and tried to keep the conversation friendly, even though he pointed out the “skin” tattoo on his arm and his shaved head, and kept mentioning how he’s been to jail. It was fairly obvious this guy was wanting to intimidate people, and I wasn’t giving him his fun. The whole time my brother and I expected him to take a swing, but at some point I just tapped him on the side with the back of my hand and said “hey it’s been good talking, but we kind of want to get back to our game” and the guy turned and walked away. The reason I mention that is because I hear people getting aggressive responses from other men with high levels of none. And also that they attract older women. I wasn’t wearing none at all though. Is it possible that I have naturally high levels? I mean, I never come across as being intimidating or aggressive to people, so the thought hasn’t occured to me before. Any thoughts? ---
**Author:** ![M\_M](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9fc29f/32.png) [@M\_M](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/M_M)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 8:40pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/2 "2009-11-16T20:40:20Z")
Sorry to be the one that gives you this SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN, but … It’s today’s fashion … the older hunting the younger. It use to be a man’s thing, but now with the movies, books, and romance novels all forming today’s fashion … **“I kissed a girl, and I liked it”** … it has become fashion, too! I see it everywhere I go … older women drooling over that young meat. Take it as a compliment, and just say NO if you find it disturbing. I’d rather have a woman wanting my body any day that ends with **‘Y’** than to have one trying to empty my pockets! 😉 If she’s older, annnnnd she’s hot … count me in!!! If she’s older, and is as pretty as a pig, I’m in **IF** she gets me realllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll drunk, and ask me nicely! 😃 NOT! Run! Joblo! Run! See Joblo run! Joblo can run fast! Joblo can run far! Oh my! She caught up with Joblo! Joblo is dead meat! Sorry Joblo! Sorry! Any mature mone that attracts the nose of the elderly, puts you on their menu, Joblo … Nols, -Nones or -Rones … would be my guest. You have to catch and release … keep what you like, and run from or throw back what you don’t. ---
**Author:** ![Xiphoid](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/xiphoid/32/1852_2.png) [@Xiphoid](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Xiphoid)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 8:51pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/3 "2009-11-16T20:51:56Z")
> [@joblo1986](#): > > Well the title explains it. I am just wondering why this is happening, and what I can do to shift the age group down to my age. I am 23, and the girls I attract are 30-35, which I’m really not that into. Oy! What’s wrong with us mature ladies eh? Think of it this way…10 more years is 10 more years of experience… You might learn a thing or two 😉 ---
**Author:** ![tangent](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tangent/32/5178_2.png) [@tangent](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/tangent)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 9:00pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/4 "2009-11-16T21:00:47Z")
> [@Xiphoid](#): > > Oy! What’s wrong with us mature ladies eh? Think of it this way…10 more years is 10 more years of experience… You might learn a thing or two 😉 Errm yes. This. Just… this. ---
**Author:** ![mikotorocks714](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mikotorocks714/32/1509_2.png) [@mikotorocks714](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mikotorocks714)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 9:42pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/5 "2009-11-16T21:42:09Z")
Easy, STOP smiling at the 30 year old ladies with that look of interest that you say you do to “establish some sort of presence.” They’ll obviously end up seeing it as an IOI, so since older ladies _are more sure about what they want_ and are usually on the prowl they’ll have the confidence to go up and get what they want from the person who’s giving _them_ interest (in this case you.) If you’re not going to be interested than obviously _don’t_ even show them _any_ kind of flirtatious smiling or looks of interest, just ignore them and don’t stay looking at them until they smile back. ---
**Author:** ![scotties123](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c37758/32.png) [@scotties123](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/scotties123)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 9:53pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/6 "2009-11-16T21:53:24Z")
> [@mikotorocks714](#): > > Easy, STOP smiling at the 30 year old ladies with that look of interest that you say you do to “establish some sort of presence.” They’ll obviously end up seeing it as an IOI, so since older ladies _are more sure about what they want_ and are usually on the prowl they’ll have the confidence to go up and get what they want from the person who’s giving _them_ interest (in this case you.) If you’re not going to be interested than obviously _don’t_ even show them _any_ kind of flirtatious smiling or looks of interest, just ignore them and don’t stay looking at them until they smile back. While I was reading your post I was thinking **exactly** everything mikoto said. If you don’t want _their_ attention then don’t give them _yours_. It’s quite simple. It’s the same reason you don’t flirt with girls you don’t find attractive. Obviously you don’t want anything from them, so why flirt? I will admit though that there have been a number of times where I would flirt with a girl and maybe even pull her number, with no intention of actually pursuing it, but just to prove to myself that I still have game. This was of course in my younger days when I had more steady girlfriends and wanted to keep my game fresh 😃. ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 9:56pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/7 "2009-11-16T21:56:40Z")
I used to get this also. What is your personality like? Are you relatively passive and inactive when it comes to making the first ‘move’ in courtship? I only say this because I know I was (and also because you say you don’t approach) I’m willing to bet that an equal percentage of women are attracted to you across the age range, you just appear to get more attention from the older women as their experience gives them greater confidence in displaying more obvious interest, approaching, making the first moves, etc. Really at my age (21, so I presume 23 isn’t much different) you have to be the one to make the initial contact if you want to get anywhere with girls around our age. In fact any effective attraction [pheromone](https://a314.com/shop/) mix is only going to emphasise the gap in her mind between your value and her own. The reason why I, at first, was hesitant of approaching was because I underestimated my own value and overestimated attractive girl’s value. Believe it or not, girl’s our age will probably have the same insecurities holding them back; they will probably think that _you_ are too good for them. Older women – insecurities or not - are much more likely to throw caution to the wind and approach you anyway – the fear of rejection to them is less freighting than the ticking of her biological clock. I actually have a thing for older women – an eye-catching 36 year old once showed me a thing or two - although in a bar setting attractive older women are rare, emphasis on the word ‘attractive’. ---
**Author:** ![evolver](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/evolver/32/1896_2.png) [@evolver](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/evolver)\ **Post date:** [November 16, 2009, 10:25pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/8 "2009-11-16T22:25:18Z")
Easy. Choose venues where there are younger women and no older chicks. At bars with older women you get (surprise) older women. Try new bars with your brother in law. There are a lot of other things you can do as well, but I say just go for the good fishin holes set up your rod and wait. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![joblo1986](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@joblo1986](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/joblo1986)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2009, 1:34am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/9 "2009-11-17T01:34:49Z")
> [@WildFlower](#): > > I used to get this also. What is your personality like? Are you relatively passive and inactive when it comes to making the first ‘move’ in courtship? I only say this because I know I was (and also because you say you don’t approach) > > I’m willing to bet that an equal percentage of women are attracted to you across the age range, you just appear to get more attention from the older women as their experience gives them greater confidence in displaying more obvious interest, approaching, making the first moves, etc. > > Really at my age (21, so I presume 23 isn’t much different) you have to be the one to make the initial contact if you want to get anywhere with girls around our age. In fact any effective attraction pheromone mix is only going to emphasise the gap in her mind between your value and her own. The reason why I, at first, was hesitant of approaching was because I underestimated my own value and overestimated attractive girl’s value. Believe it or not, girl’s our age will probably have the same insecurities holding them back; they will probably think that _you_ are too good for them. Older women – insecurities or not - are much more likely to throw caution to the wind and approach you anyway – the fear of rejection to them is less freighting than the ticking of her biological clock. > > I actually have a thing for older women – an eye-catching 36 year old once showed me a thing or two - although in a bar setting attractive older women are rare, emphasis on the word ‘attractive’. What you say here is kind of what I was wondering about. Yes, I am a fairly passive guy. I will be working on that. I am in a state right now of trying to improve myself and learn. The only girl I’ve ever loved broke up with me recently, after 2 years, and so I’ve obviously been going through some tough times, self-esteem issues (though I’m not a bad looking guy at all), and depression. I’ve also got a 5 year old son whom obviously I have to put ahead of any girl I date. And I find myself believing that girls my age have no interest in dating single dads, because truth-be-told, I haven’t come across too many who are. Also, I’ve got social anxiety when it comes to women. Not in approaching, and talking to. Just the “performance” part of it. In other words, I have a fear of what comes after the approach. Of the entire progression from “hi” on to sex, relationship, whatever. On that note, I have a fear of the performance part of sex, and know that at some point after getting with a girl, it will be something that will happen, and it keeps me from pursuing women, because I know that anxiety is going to royally fuck up the first time or two with a girl, even though after that will be mind blowing (I reallize that the only way to get over this anxiety is much repeat exposure 😉. It’s the same fear I have when it comes to playing guitar and singing for people. I’m not all that bad, I know, but it doesn’t stop the fear of performance. But it’s funny because there are so many other things that don’t make me nervous. I’m not that uncomfortable talking in front of crowds. Job interviews, even with many interviewers involved like my last one, are a breeze and I’m super confident. I got off topic there. Anyway, it’s nice to hear that my suspicion about older women being more confident in approaching, but younger women being equally interested, is well founded. It’s interesting to me that the only way I really value really hot chicks over myself is that they are not parents, and I lower my value because of it, and feel like I don’t want to bother wasting my time with girls who aren’t interested anyway. And I’m not sure how to manage that transition from “hi” into “I’m a dad”, without being either deceptive or immediately pushing them away. All things to figure out in time. Meanwhile I’m hitting the gym, and getting my shit back together. > [@mikotorocks714](#): > > Easy, STOP smiling at the 30 year old ladies with that look of interest that you say you do to “establish some sort of presence.” They’ll obviously end up seeing it as an IOI, so since older ladies _are more sure about what they want_ and are usually on the prowl they’ll have the confidence to go up and get what they want from the person who’s giving _them_ interest (in this case you.) If you’re not going to be interested than obviously _don’t_ even show them _any_ kind of flirtatious smiling or looks of interest, just ignore them and don’t stay looking at them until they smile back. Haha, okay. Part of my problem is that I’ve got bad eyes, but don’t want to wear glasses except for driving, and when I step into a bar and catch eyes with a girl from across the room, I can’t often judge age very well. In a dark bar from 10 feet away, an 6 can look like an 8 to me. Which was the case last night. I also feel a challenge that I can’t back down from when people make eye contact with me or vice versa. I don’t break it. I don’t want to make it seem like I am annoyed by these women. I mean it’s fun in it’s own way if a bit mean of me. I don’t mean to lead them on or anything. My question here was really about the difference between the older and younger women, and why it’s the older women who I get the most obvious attraction from. It’s annoying that girls my age don’t act the same, but at the same time I suspect I’ll have a lot more fun when I actually start putting myself out there and approaching them. > [@evolver](#): > > Easy. > > Choose venues where there are younger women and no older chicks. At bars with older women you get (surprise) older women. Try new bars with your brother in law. There are a lot of other things you can do as well, but I say just go for the good fishin holes set up your rod and wait. 🙂 Well I choose venues where there is somehting to do other than sit and drink. I don’t really like dancing… then again that’s probably another aspect of my social anxiety I should work on… so I go places with pool tables. And this particular joint ALWAYS has open tables. It’s the only place around that does. And I’ll assure you, I’ve been to every bar within a reasonable drive of my house. But even when I go to places with a mostly younger crowd, I get much the same result. I appreciate the input, people. As I’ve said, I’m in this to learn. I’ve got the pheromones just for fun but I don’t really want to rely on them. I’m all about improving myself and my abilities and thus increasing my confidence and my happiness. Now, it’s off to the gym… ---
**Author:** ![Gegogi](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/gegogi/32/1536_2.png) [@Gegogi](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Gegogi)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2009, 1:47am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/10 "2009-11-17T01:47:26Z")
Also realize androsterone is a mone which tends to impart a mature alpha male vibe. Sorta of a friendly and somewhat fatherly (as in authority) alpha vibe. It other words, it makes younger men seem older, mature and more established socially. And you were wearing a shitload of androsterone, hanging in a bar full of older women smiling and making eye contact. You might as well have used a Sharpie to scrawl “cougar bait” across your forehead… ---
**Author:** ![mikotorocks714](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mikotorocks714/32/1509_2.png) [@mikotorocks714](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mikotorocks714)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2009, 1:55am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/11 "2009-11-17T01:55:04Z")
OK, well I can see now where you’re coming from. It’s normal to be afraid and nervous of new relationships/future relationships so know that this isn’t completely your fault as everyone feels this. I’m guessing you were used to being only with your ex, and used to the feeling of being a dad in a stable faithful relationship? If so, obviously these new changes are going to be grabbing a hold of you, so really only thing to do is to go out there and fight these feelings as they’re just that, feelings and nothing more. Younger girls are definitely very immature, not all of them I’m sure but most of them. Especially ones who hang out at bars and clubs as they’re just there to have fun and possibly go wild. Where as older women are there to find a mate (usually,) plus younger girls WANT to be the center of attention and be the ones to have a guy go up to them (and probably don’t even know what they want.) Rarely do you see younger girls go up to guys, especially shy timid guys. That’s why you see a lot of jerks with younger girls, because they’re jerks who aren’t afraid of the approach and going up to a girl as they’re just too busy being pompous with their machismo where as shy timid guys don’t have the guts to do this because of their nice characteristics. The only way you might have a girl go up to a shy guy is by luck, venue, or by networking/friends and using them as messengers to get your message across without you doing it yourself. Only then will she then know, and maybe even make it easier to receive a connection. So all in all, just fight those feelings and have faith in yourself. And about the older ladies, I have an astigmatism so I know about not being able to tell an appearance until you get closer LOL. You can still look without giving off a flirtatious vibe you know, just give a simple _friendly_ smile and look away fast. I mean no need to avoid, but just don’t show IOI type of stares and you’ll be fine. > [@joblo1986](#): > > What you say here is kind of what I was wondering about. Yes, I am a fairly passive guy. I will be working on that. I am in a state right now of trying to improve myself and learn. The only girl I’ve ever loved broke up with me recently, after 2 years, and so I’ve obviously been going through some tough times, self-esteem issues (though I’m not a bad looking guy at all), and depression. I’ve also got a 5 year old son whom obviously I have to put ahead of any girl I date. And I find myself believing that girls my age have no interest in dating single dads, because truth-be-told, I haven’t come across too many who are. Also, I’ve got social anxiety when it comes to women. Not in approaching, and talking to. Just the “performance” part of it. In other words, I have a fear of what comes after the approach. Of the entire progression from “hi” on to sex, relationship, whatever. On that note, I have a fear of the performance part of sex, and know that at some point after getting with a girl, it will be something that will happen, and it keeps me from pursuing women, because I know that anxiety is going to royally fuck up the first time or two with a girl, even though after that will be mind blowing (I reallize that the only way to get over this anxiety is much repeat exposure 😉. It’s the same fear I have when it comes to playing guitar and singing for people. I’m not all that bad, I know, but it doesn’t stop the fear of performance. But it’s funny because there are so many other things that don’t make me nervous. I’m not that uncomfortable talking in front of crowds. Job interviews, even with many interviewers involved like my last one, are a breeze and I’m super confident. > > I got off topic there. Anyway, it’s nice to hear that my suspicion about older women being more confident in approaching, but younger women being equally interested, is well founded. It’s interesting to me that the only way I really value really hot chicks over myself is that they are not parents, and I lower my value because of it, and feel like I don’t want to bother wasting my time with girls who aren’t interested anyway. And I’m not sure how to manage that transition from “hi” into “I’m a dad”, without being either deceptive or immediately pushing them away. All things to figure out in time. Meanwhile I’m hitting the gym, and getting my shit back together. > > Haha, okay. Part of my problem is that I’ve got bad eyes, but don’t want to wear glasses except for driving, and when I step into a bar and catch eyes with a girl from across the room, I can’t often judge age very well. In a dark bar from 10 feet away, an 6 can look like an 8 to me. Which was the case last night. > > I also feel a challenge that I can’t back down from when people make eye contact with me or vice versa. I don’t break it. I don’t want to make it seem like I am annoyed by these women. I mean it’s fun in it’s own way if a bit mean of me. I don’t mean to lead them on or anything. My question here was really about the difference between the older and younger women, and why it’s the older women who I get the most obvious attraction from. It’s annoying that girls my age don’t act the same, but at the same time I suspect I’ll have a lot more fun when I actually start putting myself out there and approaching them. > > Well I choose venues where there is somehting to do other than sit and drink. I don’t really like dancing… then again that’s probably another aspect of my social anxiety I should work on… so I go places with pool tables. And this particular joint ALWAYS has open tables. It’s the only place around that does. And I’ll assure you, I’ve been to every bar within a reasonable drive of my house. But even when I go to places with a mostly younger crowd, I get much the same result. > > I appreciate the input, people. As I’ve said, I’m in this to learn. I’ve got the pheromones just for fun but I don’t really want to rely on them. I’m all about improving myself and my abilities and thus increasing my confidence and my happiness. Now, it’s off to the gym… ---
**Author:** ![Gegogi](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/gegogi/32/1536_2.png) [@Gegogi](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Gegogi)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2009, 3:46am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/12 "2009-11-17T03:46:39Z")
> [@](#): > > Younger girls are definitely very immature, not all of them I’m sure but most of them. Especially ones who hang out at bars and clubs as they’re just there to have fun and possibly go wild. Well, that’s par for the course for both younger men and women hanging in bars and clubs! If anything, the same age guys seem to be trailing women a few years in maturity. > [@](#): > > Well I choose venues where there is somehting to do other than sit and drink. You might wanna steer clear of bars for meeting women. I long ago found the quality of women in those sorts of places is pretty uneven. Hang out where the women involved are more focused and refined: community theater groups, dance studios, symphony choir, young republicans meetings (massive horns on conservative women), tennis clubs, etc. It’s a lot easy to get to know them, you share common interests and you’ll see them again next week. ---
**Author:** ![mikotorocks714](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mikotorocks714/32/1509_2.png) [@mikotorocks714](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mikotorocks714)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2009, 3:54am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/13 "2009-11-17T03:54:01Z")
Yes, have the older women teach the guys a few things or two. 🙂 Nothing wrong with an older lady, just as long as she’s not too old joblo. A women who’s more mature will obviously be even more understanding regarding your situation (single father.) > [@Gegogi](#): > > Well, that’s par for the course for both younger men and women hanging in bars and clubs! If anything, the same age guys seem to be trailing women a few years in maturity. ---
**Author:** ![joblo1986](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@joblo1986](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/joblo1986)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2009, 5:14am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/14 "2009-11-17T05:14:06Z")
> [@mikotorocks714](#): > > OK, well I can see now where you’re coming from. It’s normal to be afraid and nervous of new relationships/future relationships so know that this isn’t completely your fault as everyone feels this. I’m guessing you were used to being only with your ex, and used to the feeling of being a dad in a stable faithful relationship? If so, obviously these new changes are going to be grabbing a hold of you, so really only thing to do is to go out there and fight these feelings as they’re just that, feelings and nothing more. Yeah I get that for the most part it’s all in my head. But understanding it on an intellectual level and getting over my hangups are two different things. Though I’ll say I’m wholly committed to doing so, and I realize it will just take getting out there and doing it. I’m just not sure I want to yet. Right now, I’m just trying to get my life back in order and not worrying about meeting women really at all. > [@](#): > > Younger girls are definitely very immature, not all of them I’m sure but most of them. Especially ones who hang out at bars and clubs as they’re just there to have fun and possibly go wild. Where as older women are there to find a mate (usually,) plus younger girls WANT to be the center of attention and be the ones to have a guy go up to them (and probably don’t even know what they want.) Rarely do you see younger girls go up to guys, especially shy timid guys. That’s why you see a lot of jerks with younger girls, because they’re jerks who aren’t afraid of the approach and going up to a girl as they’re just too busy being pompous with their machismo where as shy timid guys don’t have the guts to do this because of their nice characteristics. Quite honestly, I’m not looking to meet chicks in bars, which is why I only go to bars where I can shoot pool. Because that shit is fun, and I’m getting quite good. > [@](#): > > And about the older ladies, I have an astigmatism so I know about not being able to tell an appearance until you get closer LOL. You can still look without giving off a flirtatious vibe you know, just give a simple _friendly_ smile and look away fast. I mean no need to avoid, but just don’t show IOI type of stares and you’ll be fine. Haha, you get it then. I have an astigmatism in one eye and a injury in my other where I was lucky to keep my eye. So all-in-all my vision sucks. The thing is, I never bothered to flirt with chicks much until recently, and now only for fun and not to pick them up. I never realized so many of them would approach me. Well, the more mature ones anyway. As I said, I’m quite new to this and expected I wouldn’t have any luck picking up chicks unless I approached them. I didn’t realize there would be a drastic difference with age. > [@Gegogi](#): > > Well, that’s par for the course for both younger men and women hanging in bars and clubs! If anything, the same age guys seem to be trailing women a few years in maturity. I’ve unfortunately been cursed with being more mature than most girls around my age. It’s unfortunate, because I don’t find myself physically attracted to many women much older than me, nor do I find myself mentally/emotionally attraced to many girls my own age. My most recent LTR being an exception, as she was more mature than most girls he age as well. > [@](#): > > You might wanna steer clear of bars for meeting women. I long ago found the quality of women in those sorts of places is pretty uneven. Hang out where the women involved are more focused and refined: community theater groups, dance studios, symphony choir, young republicans meetings (massive horns on conservative women), tennis clubs, etc. It’s a lot easy to get to know them, you share common interests and you’ll see them again next week. If I were to meet any women in bars, it would be for nothing more than a ONS, perhaps something more ongoing but definately not much more than sexual. I don’t see that as being a very solid foundation for a relationship. > [@mikotorocks714](#): > > Yes, have the older women teach the guys a few things or two. 🙂 > > Nothing wrong with an older lady, just as long as she’s not too old joblo. A women who’s more mature will obviously be even more understanding regarding your situation (single father.) Hey, as long as the physical attraction is there, no problem. But that is the key. Even women who are attractive within their age group I USUALLY do not find as attractive by virtue of their age. Not sure what it is. Though there have certainly been exceptions. ---
**Author:** ![Pheraoh](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/pheraoh/32/857_2.png) [@Pheraoh](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Pheraoh)\ **Post date:** [November 17, 2009, 11:21pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/15 "2009-11-17T23:21:46Z")
> [@Xiphoid](#): > > Oy! What’s wrong with us mature ladies eh? Think of it this way…10 more years is 10 more years of experience… You might learn a thing or two 😉 I have to agree. Although in some cases you get an additional 10 years of mental baggage to go with the sexual experience. Don’t ask me how I know. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mtnjim](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mtnjim/32/2010_2.png) [@Mtnjim](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Mtnjim)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2009, 1:38am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/16 "2009-11-18T01:38:50Z")
Don’t know what’s wrong with a hot _young_ 30something woman. Old enough to be experienced, young enough to still be hot. The other night, I met a 30something well known (hot) San Diego TV personality, we had a great time, got an e-mail Sunday, she’s looking forward to our next meeting. Age is relative and irrelevant. 🙄 ---
**Author:** ![Gegogi](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/gegogi/32/1536_2.png) [@Gegogi](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Gegogi)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2009, 8:59am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/17 "2009-11-18T08:59:42Z")
> [@Pheraoh](#): > > I have to agree. Although in some cases you get an additional 10 years of mental baggage to go with the sexual experience. Don’t ask me how I know. 😃 You don’t necessarily need experience to accumulate baggage. Ships as original equipment on plenty of teens and 20-somethings, but sans the sexual expertise (that’s an optional package). ---
**Author:** ![djandarial](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/djandarial/32/1667_2.png) [@djandarial](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/djandarial)\ **Post date:** [November 18, 2009, 8:01pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/18 "2009-11-18T20:01:37Z")
yea… you were cougar bait… Phero with caution, if you are phero and drinking, which I do not recommend… Have a non-phero friend ---
**Author:** ![Pheraoh](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/pheraoh/32/857_2.png) [@Pheraoh](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Pheraoh)\ **Post date:** [November 19, 2009, 9:21am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/i-keep-attracting-older-chicks-and-its-kind-of-annoying/34133/19 "2009-11-19T09:21:26Z")
> [@Gegogi](#): > > You don’t necessarily need experience to accumulate baggage. Ships as original equipment on plenty of teens and 20-somethings, but sans the sexual expertise (that’s an optional package). I made no definitive absolutist assertions as to the mythical ratio of “Years being alive on the planet firmly dictating sexual experience and baggage quantities.”