Miss Dragon's Journal! Yay!

Field Reports & Anecdotal Experience Women's Journals
181

IO

IO

Yesterday I had a meeting with a colleague who I’m collaborating with on a major project. He’s also rather new, and I’d only met him one other time. He’s actually the one who got hired into the job I’d almost gotten hired for, lol! I wonder if he knows that! I hope not, I don’t want him to feel awkward. Since we’d never exchanged more than a few words to each other previously and now we were supposed to sit down together and develop a project, I thought some mones would come in handy.

I thought I’d brought CTTM, but as I looked at the bottle in the elevator, I saw that I’d grabbed IO. Darn, this would have been a great opportunity to give CTTM a test run! Well, I applied 4 sprays of IO (togo sized). Maybe that was a bit much, but I was annoyed at not having CTTM, and I suppose that was one way of venting my annoyance. Well, I instantly felt jittery and nervous! I don’t think I’ve ever used more than 2 sprays of IO in the past, and i know that I’d felt jitters and nerves, but I attributed that to other things at the time. But today, it was unmistakable! I had felt perfectly fine only seconds before! I was really wishing I’d had some p130 to tame it down with! In the future, I think I’ll always use p130 with IO.

I used 1 spray of IH (30ml sized) to round it out a bit. That seemed to help, but it wasn’t perfect.

Poor guy! Moments after he joined me in the meeting room, I could tell the mones had hit him! He seemed so nervous and off his game! I was still struggling to keep my nerves under control. I had no problem talking, but I kept getting tongue-tied, and had trouble focusing. It was like overdosing on caffeine, but without the energy boost. He kept apologizing for being unprepared, and kept saying that he wasn’t sure what to contribute. He did contribute a good deal, however, and he’d brought some very helpful paperwork with him. He just got the rug pulled out from under him by the IO!

I’m pretty sure he interpreted his feelings as crush symptoms, though. When we passed each other in the hall a few hours later, he nearly tripped over himself gushing out a torrent of stupid-sounding jokey greetings! Poor guy! It was a bit adorable, though. Gotta love it when a decent-looking guy makes a fool of himself trying to impress a girl!

In our next meeting, I’ll probably try my fave MX335 + IH combo. I’ll still test out CTTM, but I may do that in an informal environment. Don’t want to risk more jitters at work.

182

Mx335 + ih

I didn’t expect to be reporting back so soon, but here I am!

Last night, I went to a 2-hour networking event. The colleague i mentioned in the previous post showed up, too. In all, there were over 500 people there, but only 4 of us were from my company. One from our group was a guy I’d met before, but I didn’t really know him very much, and the 4th guy I was meeting for the first time. I was the only lady in our group.

I wore 2 sprays IH (30ml) with 4 sprays MX335 on top. And a kick-ass dress and heels. Well, my friends, this is the combo to turn a bunch of smart nerds into personal puppy-dogs (or sex fiends, depending on their confidence level, lol)! First off, this mix definitely enhanced the bubbly, confident, yet nonchalant (think: adorable and gives zero fucks) aspect of my personality that is kryptonite to boys’ inhibitions, yet I just can’t muster it when I’m stressed or down.

I was like a walking candy bar the whole time! They did a little ice-breaking game at the beginning (which I kicked ass at, due to my competitive nature), and got LOTS of DIHL, mostly from dudes from Ford! Some of them were bold enough to banter/flirt a little bit, but I could see the inner monologue in the eyes of most of them: “I wish I knew how to make her stick around, but I’m too scared to do anything about it!”

The guy from my company that I was a bit familiar with is married, so he and I simply joked and hung out. But my project colleague made himself my slave! Gosh! He glued himself to my side, he took my empty cup and went on a mission to throw it away (I had just made a passing comment that I couldn’t find a trash can), and he grabbed me and pulled me next to him for a picture that was taken! He even got himself a glass of a revolting drink just because I was laughing about how bad it tasted! I bet he would’ve cut off his right arm if I’d asked him!

Our fourth coworker’s warming up was much more gradual. He was very formal and rigid when we first met, and seemed to have no intention of continuing to talk with me until I asked him some very specific questions about the way his job relates to me. Through that, he definitely started to melt, and by the midway point of the event, he was just as chummy as anyone. I could sense mild attraction from him, but he definitely had the sort of logical mind that didn’t allow him to act upon emotional whims. Perhaps he has a girlfriend; I don’t know.

But then I also met the creepy sex fiend dude! It started off innocently enough, he wandered over to our group and was talking with my colleague about business stuff. I threw my 2 cents in every now and then, but eventually the guy was leaning into my space with an “I’m going to eat you alive” look in his eye! I could tell that he was already ravaging me in his mind! I partly liked his intensity, but partly felt unsafe. He ended up exchanging contact info with both of us, but I’m definitely going to ignore him when he contacts me.

So yeah. In general, a wonderful mix. But watch out for the creepers!

Dealing with a creep
183

Yeah. The creepy dude emailed me. Apparently he internet stalked me over the weekend, and then emailed me with all of the things we have in common. And then he straight up asked me out. I’m so creeped out, I can’t even tell you. There’s just something seriously wrong that I’m sensing about this guy. And I might see him at a few more events! I am usually very against lying (I see it as cowardly), but I don’t see any way of letting this guy down while trusting that he’ll respect my answer. So I might just have to tell him that I have a boyfriend. Unless you guys can come up with another solution for me.

At any rate, I’m going to tell my coworkers about this guy bothering me, and hopefully they’ll keep an eye out if he shows up to another event.

184

…or perhaps I should just ignore him. Would that be too much of a bitch move?

185

So you could just tell him you want to be professional and not get involved and see what he says. So is it that he just gives off a creepy vibe? I would tell him that and see what happens.

186

Well… since he already asked, you are expected to respond. Grab that opportunity to say no. :slight_smile: Its not your problem anymore how he’ll react to your answer. As long as you made it clear that you’ve got no only for an answer.

You can do it with your friends around so that everyone knows what’s the real score between the two of you. (Courtship should not be a secret anyway) That way, he’ll seriously understand too that you are seriously not into him.

At that rejection period, you are not to show any nice smile that can be interpreted as another open door for him to take. Let him feel that you really mean no when you said no. Don’t laugh at his jokes. Never chime in specially if he’s the last one who raised a point, or you have an idea that corresponds to his. If he persist on engaging you, ignore him and use your cellphone to make yourself busy… text someone, or play a game. Remember, you are not doing it against his person, you are doing it in defense of your person.

You can be friendly again after you finally observed that he got your message clear, and stopped pursuing that particular interest for you.

Don’t get affected by creeps. Remain beautiful. :slight_smile:

187

Yeah, he’s pretty creepy. And there are a few things about him that just don’t line up. For instance, he seems to be in his early 40’s and he boasts about having lots of impressive work experience and connections, yet he has an absolutely pee-on job. So he’s either a liar who took a long time to start taking his life seriously, or he’s a shitty employee who employers hate.

I’m by no means a shallow person, but he certainly doesn’t have the sort of looks that can pull off an “eye fuck” with no prior indication of attraction or connection. So that was definitely off-putting, and makes me feel like he might be unpredictable and not likely to respect me in the future.

I wouldn’t voluntarily tell him he’s giving off a creepy vibe. That sounds insulting, and true creeps don’t handle insults well. If he asked me what the problem was, I’d find a tactful way of letting him know. Under normal circumstances, if I turn a guy down because of some major faux pas on his end, I’ll tell him; decent guys deserve a chance to clean up their act for the next girl.

188

Thanks, Dee! Great advice! Most people I meet aren’t creeps, and most creeps I meet I won’t ever see again! I definitely appreciate your expertise.

189

Creepers, Life, and MX335 + IH

As a follow-up, I did respond to the creeper guy. I basically thanked him for his offer, told him plainly that I’m not interested, and wished him best of luck. He was polite about it, and backed down. I haven’t seen him since, and I suspect he’s been avoiding me. Still, I might see him next week. I’ll tell my coworker to keep an eye out for me, but I ought be in the clear.

Sorry that I haven’t been on in a while, guys. Going through a rough time. My dad is in hospice now, and I’m told that he might have only a few weeks left. I had moved into his house when we thought he might be coming home, but now we’re losing the house this month and I have to scramble to find a place to go. And I don’t know if I will have my job in the new fiscal year, because my department might be making cuts. So I’m basically in the perfect storm.

But I can say that my boss adores me, and she really doesn’t want to lose me. My typical work wardrobe is 2 sprays of IH (30 ml bottle) with 2 sprays MX335 layered on top. I take a week off every now and then to rest everyone’s neuro-receptors, but my boss positively lights up whenever I wear it. In fact, she’s having me fill in for her at a meeting between her and a major insurance company. Wow, do I feel honored and unprepared!

With the coworker from another department, he’s been an interesting case study. I love observing people and figuring them out, and he has certainly been a challenge! I’ve had to do SO MUCH breaking down of his inhibitions! He was so scared of me for a while! IO definitely made him feel crushy toward me initially, but it also reinforced his natural fear tendencies. He tolerates MX335 + IH much better. Sometimes, if we really have to get down to business, I’ll wear only IH.

I would use p130 around him more often, but I’m rationing it because I’m getting really low. Call me selfish, but I’d rather use it for selfies when I really need them. Like last week when he and I gave a presentation to 4 different department heads. Of course, being in close proximity to me, he did get some benefit. I only wore 15mcg (cookie scent) at the time, but I should’ve worn WAY more!

Oh, and I met a pretty cool guy, but then when I saw him again a week later (I was about to invite him out for drinks), he politely ditched me. Such an ego blow. And a few days ago, a cute guy I’ve seen around the office struck up a convo with me, and I decided he’d make a worthy next target. But when I passed by his desk today (he had the day off), I saw a picture of a girl who might be his girlfriend. I’ll have to find a way to ask his closest coworker if he’s single. But seriously, I can’t handle 2 let-downs in less than a week! Makes me want to go do something reckless!

With my busy schedule, I haven’t been to Fangirl’s house in a long time, and thus haven’t seen her hottie bro. But I did go over there this past Saturday when my friends threw me a surprise birthday party. Wasn’t a surprise to me, though. I figured it out right away, because Fangirl is a terrible liar. Anyway, most of her siblings (except for the 2 youngest) kept their distance from all the guests, including Hottie Bro. Bummer. I’d been hoping that distance might’ve made his heart grow fond. But maybe he just didn’t feel like joining a crowd that he didn’t know. Still, that kinda makes it feel like 3 let-downs in less than a week.

I didn’t wear any pheros to the party, because the world was getting on top of me, and I just felt like being a wallflower at my own party. So nothing to report there. But I did finally loosen up near the end and join a battle with fake weapons (not technically LARPing, because there were no characters, story, or points…strictly bludgeoning only). Then I played 4-person Mario.

I have to find out tomorrow if the new office hottie is single or not, or I swear I’ll go crazy.

190

My prayers for your dad, Miss.

191

Thank you, Dee. You’re a sweetheart.

Brief update, just so people don’t think I’ve sunken into a self-destructive depressive spiral. I still haven’t found out if the recent office cutie is single or not, he and his coworker have been out of the office a lot on business. But I’ve been preemptively letting my expectations down. Turns out that this was a good move, because that inspired me to make a move toward the decent looking guy who sits 3 desks away from me. I’ve met him once before, and he seemed really enthusiastic to meet me, but we both generally keep to ourselves, so nothing came of it. Yesterday, though, I decided to try to revisit that window. Next time he walked past my desk, I stopped him and asked for some input on the project I was working on. I really didn’t need his input, but thought it would be a decent tactic. He mostly complemented me on everything I’d done. He gave one small suggestion, and I made a big deal out of it like it was the burst of inspiration I’d needed. As we talked, I noticed that as he studied my work, he was ever-so-slightly nervous and shaky. I was impressed, because his slight nerves didn’t hinder him in any way from engaging with me. This can be a rare find! So I’ll see if anything comes of it. I was wearing 1 or 2 sprays of IH at the time, so I’m sure this at least made some sort of an unnatural impression.

I feel a lot better, because I absolutely hate those dry seasons when I just don’t have any prospects. It’s nice to at least know I’ve got specific possibilities.

193

My dad passed away this morning.

194

My condolences Miss D. :frowning:

195

I’m so sorry, Miss Dragon. Having lost my own father, I know it is a hard thing. You are in my thoughts and prayers, even though we have never met.
You have my deepest sympathies.

196

I am very sorry to hear this. I haven’t lost a parent yet and can’t even imagine what you are going through. I know you will get lots of support especially from the community here. I will say a prayer for you and your family.

197

Hang in there Miss Dragon..

198

Thanks, guys. Your support means a lot to me.

199

Also, I just found out that my department is being dissolved by the end of this year. So that’s weird. Basically everything I’ve done so far is pointless, aside from adding to my resume. And most of my to-do list is now moot. What do I do with myself now?

200

The good thing about this is that you have ample time to scout for next employment prospect.

You can also focus all your friendly phero mixes on your boss, so that she can at least recommend you to a dozen of other companies. Make her your top employment network. :slight_smile:

201

I was in this situation a year back I just got divorced and moved into a new job. I felt like everything in my life was going to shit. I then found out that everything does happen for a reason. I’m in a great job and I have a really good girl right now.

I do have one piece of advice for you, don’t always base a guy on looks, I’m not saying you do. I have always learned that the better looking aperson is the more issues they usually have. I have learned that the more avg looking people are more down to earth and are much kinder than, better looking people.

I’m sorry to hear about your dad I know the pain you are going through there is nothing I can say that will make it easier.