# My oh my, were did the respect go? **URL:** \ **Category:** Women's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports\ **Created:** [July 28, 2009, 10:43am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065 "2009-07-28T10:43:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![moonwhisper](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonwhisper/32/1735_2.png) [@moonwhisper](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/moonwhisper)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 3:28am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/61 "2009-07-30T03:28:22Z")
> [@ElectraComplex](#): > > WHaaa? Naked where? oh pheros lol silly me. > Oi if the hunter is cute you might save a deer šŸ˜› wear extra? > > That was really sweet of you mark šŸ™‚ > > Kudos. LOL Forgive me for not being plain. I meant I would have to forego the pheros so as to not be chased by a boar. I am the cute hunter. At least Iā€™m one of them. šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![msselva](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/msselva/32/943_2.png) [@msselva](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/msselva)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 4:49am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/62 "2009-07-30T04:49:34Z")
Well Domnk, I just shared some love with you šŸ˜ƒ šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![jankren](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/f0a364/32.png) [@jankren](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jankren)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 6:56am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/63 "2009-07-30T06:56:16Z")
> [@Domnk](#): > > Well, that means you better stop cutting your hair, brushing your teeth, wearing clothes, and bathingā€¦ šŸ˜®šŸ˜‰ Sorry man but those are ridiculous analogies. There are consequences for not cutting your hair, brushing your teeth, wearing clothers and bathing. If you dont wear pheros its not like you are going to smell bad and disturb others or destroy your body. > [@](#): > > Oh lordy. Donā€™t be so convinced that women are using pheromones to attract their soulmates. A lot of the women would like enhance their relationships AND their sexual experiences. There are a lot of single women here and a lot of women who seem to be really sexually liberated and explorative. As a woman, it takes no great talent to find someone willing to screw you..but when you find GOOD Quality sex, you want explore and expand all possibilities. One night-stands are generally fumbly, unsatisfactory ruttingsā€“mediocre at best. You canā€™t imagine using pheromones for any other reason then getting a laid by random chicks in a clubā€¦ I CANā€™T imagine spending good money on pheros to get a 1-nighter with some soused guy at a club. Many guys are willing to invest a fortune for this, good for them. Lol, I dont use pheros to bed ANY woman. Unlike women, men put much more focus on appearance. I can get women who are less ā€˜prettyā€™ than me into bed easily. I use pheros to help me getting a woman who is way out of my league without having to work too hard. I just believe that putting too much effort into getting a one night stand is a waste of time. > [@](#): > > I want pheromones to make the sex more firery, animalistic, unrestrained, to intensifyā€¦more POW for my POP. Then we use pheros for similar reason. > [@](#): > > There is a world outside your penis. You just have to open the window and look around for it. I know there is, but I dont really need pheros to go through other things in life other than those related to my penis. šŸ˜ƒ ---
**Author:** ![Domnk](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/domnk/32/2269_2.png) [@Domnk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Domnk)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 7:13am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/64 "2009-07-30T07:13:29Z")
> [@jankren](#): > > Sorry man but those are ridiculous analogies. There are consequences for not cutting your hair, brushing your teeth, wearing clothers and bathing. > > If you dont wear pheros its not like you are going to smell bad and disturb others or destroy your body. I was making that comment, because you said you donā€™t like using external enhancements to get another to like you, those are external enhancements. (at least I think it was you) So stop doing those things, and you wont have that problem. šŸ˜›šŸ™„ Dominick ---
**Author:** ![Lor](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lor/32/759_2.png) [@Lor](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lor)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 7:16am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/65 "2009-07-30T07:16:02Z")
sometimes its easy to see who is negging by following postsā€¦ but not always ā˜¹ it didnt make sense to me though šŸ™„ ---
**Author:** ![Domnk](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/domnk/32/2269_2.png) [@Domnk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Domnk)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 7:18am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/66 "2009-07-30T07:18:25Z")
> [@Lor](#): > > sometimes its easy to see who is negging by following postsā€¦ but not always ā˜¹ > > it didnt make sense to me though šŸ™„ Well, it was someone who has pretty high rep points, 40-50 points were deducted šŸ™„ ---
**Author:** ![tisha23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@tisha23](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/tisha23)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 9:01am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/67 "2009-07-30T09:01:18Z")
šŸ˜  I hate when people neg others for no good reason. At least they can do is sign there name. Dont worry Dom its more of a reflection on that persons character then on yours. Really big reps coming your way šŸ˜‰ Tisha ---
**Author:** ![mark-in-dallas](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mark-in-dallas/32/860_2.png) [@mark-in-dallas](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mark-in-dallas)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 12:29pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/68 "2009-07-30T12:29:11Z")
> [@Domnk](#): > > Well, it was someone who has pretty high rep points, 40-50 points were deducted šŸ™„ OK, that I donā€™t believe, because that would mean they had to have a reputation of 80 to 100 and thereā€™s not a whole lot of members who have that many, and I know most of the ones that do. You would be talking about someone like myself, Steve Renny, Bosshank or Bella negging you for no reason and not owning up to it. And none of us are that cowardly to neg someone without leaving our name, nor would we neg anyone unless they damn well deserved it. ---
**Author:** ![moonwhisper](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonwhisper/32/1735_2.png) [@moonwhisper](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/moonwhisper)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 5:18pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/69 "2009-07-30T17:18:48Z")
Perhaps it was cumulative, from more than one neg-repper who had smaller rep power. However it worked out, Dom is ahead of the game now! ---
**Author:** ![djandarial](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/djandarial/32/1667_2.png) [@djandarial](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/djandarial)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 5:32pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/70 "2009-07-30T17:32:19Z")
Bit odd, I didnā€™t neg him. I donā€™t agree, and will defend Pickup, not the lifestyle but the some of the material I like. Iā€™m sorry but Pickup is not for under age people, and very complex as it deals with social dynamics. Iā€™m sorry if some people can not understand ā€œpeople do stupid thingsā€ and when you learn to trigger stupid things, you can have a great time. Think of it this way, If you go to a comedy club, and they have bad actsā€¦ do you stop going, or do you start going up to the stage??? ---
**Author:** ![Gegogi](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/gegogi/32/1536_2.png) [@Gegogi](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Gegogi)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 5:56pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/71 "2009-07-30T17:56:14Z")
Maybe they meant to rep him but were drunk or something and brushed the wrong button? ---
**Author:** ![msselva](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/msselva/32/943_2.png) [@msselva](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/msselva)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 6:00pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/72 "2009-07-30T18:00:37Z")
> [@Gegogi](#): > > Maybe they meant to rep him but were drunk or something and brushed the wrong button? lol you just opened up a million other possibilities!! LOL imagine someone pushing the wrong button by accident, but then they would have made up for it by repping the personā€¦no? ---
**Author:** ![mark-in-dallas](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mark-in-dallas/32/860_2.png) [@mark-in-dallas](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mark-in-dallas)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 6:09pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/73 "2009-07-30T18:09:49Z")
It wasnā€™t 40 or 50 points that were subtracted from your reputation Domnk, I know exactly how many it was and it was quite a few less, and Iā€™m pretty sure I know who did it. In looking back at the original post, you start out by saying that itā€™s not your intent to bash anybody, but then make this statement: > [@Domnk](#): > > it just lacks emotional presence, some empathy. It just hurts, it strikes a cord, which seems to be absent in that congregate, and this > [@Domnk](#): > > ā€˜Soon ripe, soon rotten; soon wise, soon foolish.ā€™ > Think about it. So yeah, you did in fact strike out at that congregation, and I almost wish I had not repped you now. Itā€™s fine to have your own opinion and agree or disagree with what people do or how they live their lives, but your statements were judgmental, and you sought for others to agree and empathize with you. That just wasnā€™t right. If the member that negged you jumped over to the mens section and made statements to cast you in a poor light and try to get the guys to look down upon you, Iā€™m sure you wouldnā€™t like it, but thatā€™s pretty much what attempted to do with the ladies. ---
**Author:** ![SteveO](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/87869e/32.png) [@SteveO](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/SteveO)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 6:16pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/74 "2009-07-30T18:16:29Z")
> [@Domnk](#): > > Now, my intent is not to bash the guys, really, itā€™s just.. that, Iā€™ve been reading alot more of the womenā€™s sections more of the forum, because, well, the menā€™s section seems to be putting a bad taste in my mouth, if youā€™ll excuse the turn of phrase. Itā€™s the PUA material, I feel really bad when I read that type of thing, and it just lacks emotional presence, some empathy. It just hurts, it strikes a cord, which seems to be absent in that congregate, and Iā€™m unsure about how I feel about that absence amongā€¦ I donā€™t know whether to be saddened or angered, to cry, or disregard. > > Donā€™t get me wrong I love the people on this forum, but it is just, hurtful. Does anyone else feel this? > > ā€˜Soon ripe, soon rotten; soon wise, soon foolish.ā€™ > Think about it. > > Dominick You may not have meant to, but by generalizing an entire group of people as lacking ā€œemotional empathyā€ you certainly did a great job at it. This is actually very disrespectful to many men. > [@Domnk](#): > > Ok, thatā€™s confusing.. why? Emotional distance is your preference? I suppose in PUA methodologies apathy is helpful. šŸ˜• > > Too many assumptionsā€¦ > > Dominick But thatā€™s exactly what you are doing, too many assumptions about what PUA is really about. Can you tell me what method you have read to deduce this insight? Emotional distance, from what? Please cite your sources as you obviously have gathered enough information to make such an informed decision to be able to determine that I, as a PUA, have emotionally distanced myself. > [@Domnk](#): > > Itā€™s alright if it goes a little of track, one of the reasons I made this thread was to express how I feel, and if others would like to do the same, thatā€™s fine by me, just as long as it is void of personal attacks; long as itā€™s an open discussion and has love, I have no problem with it waning off-topic. > > Dominick Iā€™m not sure how exactly you can qualify anything in this thread by you than anything other than a personal attack against the PUA community, that you know so little about. Calling an entire community emotionless is baseless and a disregard to someones very emotions that you are claiming to champion. How is this fair to the millions of men and women, who are simply using social psychology to better themselves. > [@Domnk](#): > > Because, I care very deeply for others, I am a very emotional person, and when others are treated with disrespect, like objects rather than human beings deserving of respect and consideration, I tend to get very upset. > Emotion is a valuable thing, learn to connect with it ā˜¹ > > And I love you too, whether you like it or not.. > > Dominick So you cared enough for me, as a PUA to call me an emotionless object. Gee thanks šŸ™„. Perhaps you could learn a valuable lesson yourself from reading your own posts. > [@Domnk](#): > > Well, it was someone who has pretty high rep points, 40-50 points were deducted šŸ™„ Thatā€™s very interesting, because I can look up where these things come from, but it seems like someone expressed an ā€œemotionalā€ response to your emotional post and this is wrong? The rep system is built to agree or disagree with someone and is anonymous to allow people speak their minds without reprisal. I actually like you very much Domnk and I know we have even spoken on the phone. Iā€™m pretty sure that I was able to help you out šŸ˜›. I think what has happened though, and it does happen to all of us, is that by expressing your emotions you failed to consider other peoples emotions. We are all, obviously, not hard-wired the same way. Where as some guys use reports to recount their lives, others live their lives by reading those reports. If you take offense to someones reports than you too must first consider why those people have written the way they have. To blanket an entire culture as emotionless and lacking in wisdom is very hurtful itself and comes across as the very same way as you are making others out to be. To quote your very own words: > [@](#): > > ā€˜Soon ripe, soon rotten; soon wise, soon foolish.ā€™ > Think about it. Please do think about it šŸ˜‰ ---
**Author:** ![Carrie](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/carrie/32/1537_2.png) [@Carrie](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Carrie)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 7:08pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/75 "2009-07-30T19:08:15Z")
Steve, I appreciated Domnkā€™s initial post, and understand his sentiment. I donā€™t feel it was intended to hurt anyone, nor do I think it singled out any individual. He specifically said it was PUA _material_ heā€™d read here recently that bothered him. Many of us women feel the same way. Most of us avoid responding to it. Some women leave because of it. Voicing objection to PUA material, though, isnā€™t good for oneā€™s longevity on this forum. The forum management clearly sympathizes with the worldview of PU, and not with anyone who finds it offensive. Personally, I wouldnā€™t generalize and say ALL pua material is offensive (some of it would be helpful to anyone seeking social skills) but some of it, and some discussions of it here on Pherotalk, have been very dehumanizing, crude and nihilistic. I certainly wouldnā€™t want my company associated with it. ---
**Author:** ![djandarial](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/djandarial/32/1667_2.png) [@djandarial](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/djandarial)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 7:35pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/76 "2009-07-30T19:35:44Z")
Show me a Girl with morals, high value, and a belief in self worth. You will find a person with beliefs founded in some higher belief system, does not drink, and does not frequent bars or clubs in general. Generalization are what cause trouble, the above is no different, but it does ground itself in some truth. It all goes back to donā€™t get upset because some guy way back when got you, and guys donā€™t get upset that some girl used you for free drinks. I already said my piece on the PU world and material. I for one did not rep OP, but see this thread as causing some rift in the forum here. ---
**Author:** ![Gegogi](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/gegogi/32/1536_2.png) [@Gegogi](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Gegogi)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 7:44pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/77 "2009-07-30T19:44:55Z")
PUA is the state flower of Hawaii and I like it best in that light. As a professed lifestyleā€“hiccup artistā€“I personally find it distasteful and shallow but then I briefly lived that life and still recoil a little when I think of all things I did. Of course we didnā€™t have all the commercialization and self help industry revolving around it. We just humped women at our gigs and didnā€™t talk about it much. If I could do it all again I would have skipped those years of poor judgements. ---
**Author:** ![Domnk](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/domnk/32/2269_2.png) [@Domnk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Domnk)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 8:29pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/78 "2009-07-30T20:29:49Z")
> [@mark-in-dallas](#): > > OK, that I donā€™t believe, because that would mean they had to have a reputation of 80 to 100 and thereā€™s not a whole lot of members who have that many, and I know most of the ones that do. > > You would be talking about someone like myself, Steve Renny, Bosshank or Bella negging you for no reason and not owning up to it. And none of us are that cowardly to neg someone without leaving our name, nor would we neg anyone unless they damn well deserved it. > [@moonwhisper](#): > > Perhaps it was cumulative, from more than one neg-repper who had smaller rep power. > However it worked out, Dom is ahead of the game now! True šŸ˜› But it was just that one negative before the drop, I love reading the comments, and I find having the drop box down too distracting, so I keep it up; therefore I must monitor the points carefully, and there was a significant point drop, oh well it made my day reading the love šŸ˜ƒ > [@Gegogi](#): > > Maybe they meant to rep him but were drunk or something and brushed the wrong button? šŸ˜®, Then brushed the entire keyboard to accidentally write the message šŸ˜›šŸ˜‰ Itā€™s fine though, everyone is entitled to their opinions, I think it might have been a misunderstanding, I donā€™t know. Dominick Edit: Oh my, seems I missed a page šŸ˜® Iā€™ll have to take time to respond.. seems this post is no quite outdated and off-topic. šŸ˜® ---
**Author:** ![xev](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/xev/32/1993_2.png) [@xev](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/xev)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 8:44pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/79 "2009-07-30T20:44:45Z")
> [@djandarial](#): > > Show me a Girl with morals, high value, and a belief in self worth. > > You will find a person with beliefs founded in some higher belief system, does not drink, and does not frequent bars or clubs in general. > > Generalization are what cause trouble, the above is no different, but it does ground itself in some truth. I agree with only one thing you said here: generalization causes trouble. As an atheist who occasionally drinks and who also thinks herself to have morals, value, and worth, I disagree with the rest of it. ---
**Author:** ![Geena](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/geena/32/570_2.png) [@Geena](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Geena)\ **Post date:** [July 30, 2009, 8:57pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065/80 "2009-07-30T20:57:57Z")
I appreciated Domnkā€™s post too and didnā€™t think he was trying to hurt anyoneā€™s feeling. As a newcomer, initially I read through the menā€™s stuff and thought to myselfā€¦whatā€™s with these guys? Itā€™s like Douchebag central! Men rating women they are seeing by some number system, guys talking about women like they are cows on auction and men constantly insisting women only care about social status and cash. Men bragging about the girls they bagged over the weekend, heck I even saw guys posting cell phone pics of their supposed exploits and guys cheering on and guiding each other on how to properly illustrate to a woman just how ā€œalphaā€ he is. I also noticed a lot of guys had a bit of contempt and resentment for women and got angry when women voiced opionions of their own and an overwhelming sense of sexism and patronizing language towards the female posters. Of course this is a BROAD generalization. Some of the men are absolutely nothing like that, but initially thatā€™s a lot of what I saw as I scanned the forums. Itā€™s like SOME of the guys really do only think of women as little more than a hole with a # rating and are annoyed that the HOLES are have opinions. I was a bit bewildered. What was wrong with this bunch!?? After speaking with some of the women, I was tuned into the fact that the PUA community was a huge part of pheromone community. I had stumbled unto PUA turf. It dawned on me that itā€™s the PUAā€™s, that is this industryā€™s bread and butter. I get that now. If you want to to share the phero information and get the pheros..you have to put up with the PUA community and try to live peacefully among them. Iā€™m the visitor here. But keep in mind..sometimes when you are festered in a community, you lose touch of what the outside might think looking in. Cut Domnk some slack and put up with of us, like we have to put up with some of the PUA mentality so we can discuss something that fascinates us with like minded individuals. I do think one thing the PUA community can learn from some women..is that they REALLY donā€™t know women as good as they think they do. Your parlor tricks might work on some women, but donā€™t be too disappointed when you discover just which kind. You could understandably actually LEARN something about women FROM women and your sexlives could be improved greatly by concentrating on improving the sex instead of trying to increase the numbers. If you think ā€œstrangeā€ is super hotā€¦wait until you discover sexual chemistry and unrestrained, masterpiece sex..the kind you only get with someone you have perfected your art with. So what Iā€™m saying isā€¦as a newcomerā€¦as an OUTSIDER looking inā€¦some of the things and the material I read here are DISTURBINGLY sexist. When you are part of the community looking outside, I think people lose touch with that fact. I know that I am invading the space of the PUA community to try to learn more about pheros. I need to set my emotions aside and try to live among the natives if I want to play in their playground and use their toys. It seems that the only way I will manage that, is if I keep my butt planted FIRMLY in the womanā€™s forum. Maybe you should too, Domnk! šŸ™‚ SO anyway, generalizations go both way and Domnk didnā€™t have any sort of diabolical masterplan to slam individuals, he was stating his feelings and sentiments that Iā€™m sure he shares with a lot of the community that doesnā€™t quite ā€œfit inā€ here. There really isnā€™t anywhere else for us to go to share this interest! [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065.md?page=3) [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/my-oh-my-were-did-the-respect-go/31065.md?page=5)