# Off and running! **URL:** \ **Category:** Women's Journals\ **Created:** [February 6, 2013, 7:06am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076 "2013-02-06T07:06:44Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2013, 7:39pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/21 "2013-05-10T19:39:49Z")
I only have [Instant Shine](https://a314.com/product/shine/) in Vanilla Grapefruit. I really don’t think its the pheros that had me smelling it over and over, because I have Shine also in Neroli and Chocolatini, and they don’t call me to come and sniff. It’s not the nols, pretty sure. I like the grapefruit, too, but it’s a lot sharper than the vanilla grapefruit. ---
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2013, 3:35pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/22 "2013-05-11T15:35:55Z")
Off to a little mixer tonight. The pheros for the evening are: Copulins: 3 drops between breasts, covered with oil-based vanilla scent Instant Sexiness A: 3 sprays, two to wrists and one to cleavage, chocolatini scent [Instant Shine](https://a314.com/product/shine/) 2x strength: 2 sprays, one to hair and one to throat, vanilla graperfruit scent. Be back on later to report how this went, but it’s a great mix and I wear it to parties a lot. Expecting great things! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![CelticPrince](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/celticprince/32/397_2.png) [@CelticPrince](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CelticPrince)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2013, 3:49pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/23 "2013-05-11T15:49:47Z")
Hmmmmm…love is in the air 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2013, 10:15pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/24 "2013-05-11T22:15:29Z")
Well, then. We’ve learned something new. The combination described above is attractive to males, but also inspires great jealousy in the husband. Everyone was so attentive tonight. The guy whose house we were at kept telling me, ‘you can do anything you want. Whatever you want tonight, that’s what we’re all gonna do.’ Every man at the party was at my side at some point, offering to get me a drink, bringing me a plate of hors d’ ouvres, offering to rub my back (yup, that happened twice), asking me if I needed anything…wonderful mix. It makes me feel like a queen, and like I deserve to be one. 🙂 Hubby, on the other hand, disagreed. He was jealous and protective the whole evening. One time someone made a comment to me that was inappropriate, and D just flew off the handle. I thought we were going to have a fight on our hands! Another time I swatted a guy (our host) playfully, for something he had said. He came right back for more, and I asked him if he liked it? Husband flipped, and when he realized he was being overbearing he retired to a couch for the rest of the evening. He was extremely jealous and overwhelmed by the attention I was receiving from other men. In my own defense, I should say that none of it was explicit, nor did I pursue any of their advances. Husband had no reason to be so jealous, except for the phero signature that was messing with him. In the future I will wear this when he’s not around, or maybe lower the cops a bit. ---
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2013, 10:17pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/25 "2013-05-11T22:17:09Z")
y’know, maybe it’s the margaritas talking, but I’m not sure I want to change this, even to make D more comfortable. Am I out of line? Some of you guys come weigh in on this. ---
**Author:** ![monesmadedoit](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/monesmadedoit/32/325_2.png) [@monesmadedoit](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/monesmadedoit)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2013, 5:12am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/26 "2013-05-12T05:12:56Z")
> [@MoonlightBliss](#): > > y’know, maybe it’s the margaritas talking, but I’m not sure I want to change this, even to make D more comfortable. Am I out of line? Some of you guys come weigh in on this. Maybe lower the cops and add IH. You might be wearing the pheromone equivalent of total nudity, thus arousing every man in the room and triggering a protective instinct. You’re wearing simulated (I assume not organically derived) female vaginal secretions on your breasts. Yeah, that could be a bit awkward. ---
**Author:** ![CelticPrince](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/celticprince/32/397_2.png) [@CelticPrince](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CelticPrince)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2013, 7:45am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/27 "2013-05-12T07:45:53Z")
Reading between the lines here Moonlight, I get the impression that you liked the results you got at the party. Please correct me if I am wrong, but isn’t the reason we wear -mones is to help influence those around us, and ourselves, in a positive way, in a way that will help us accomplish our specific goals, whether that is to help be more social, build our confidence, feel/be more sexy, get laid, whatever? You were wearing an overtly sexual mix, so I am assuming that is what you wanted. You were saying, no screaming, “I am a sexy woman!” It worked, why would you want to stop wearing it around your husband? Maybe moderate it as Monesmademedoit suggests, or…maybe not. Maybe wear that combo when you and your hubby are doing things together, on date night for instance, so he gets used to it, without any perceived competition. Then be congruent with your new signature and jump his bones when you get home 😃 Forgive me, but it seems to me D is insecure about something. If I was with a hot Babe at a party where all the men were fauning over her, my attitude would be like, “Say what you want boys, but she’s with me, and Im the one bringing her home”. Then back that up when we get home. Curious to hear how things went when you got home..was D pissed off about the way things went at the party? Or did he ravage you like a jealous lover?😉 (If Im getting too personal here, feel free to PM me and tell me to piss off 🙂 Not my intention to make anyone uncomfortable ) ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Dragon](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/miss_dragon/32/866_2.png) [@Miss\_Dragon](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Miss_Dragon)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2013, 5:27pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/28 "2013-05-12T17:27:45Z")
I tend to agree with the thought about taming down the cops a bit. It’s like chemically waving your thang in a guy’s face. I bet your husband felt something like, “hey, that’s for me to enjoy, not you! Get your own!” While you absolutely deserve to be treated like a sexy attractive woman, I certainly see merit in not provoking jealousy/frustration/competition in your husband. After all, you want him to be able to enjoy a party as much as you are. ---
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2013, 7:21pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/29 "2013-05-12T19:21:39Z")
I’m not sure I even remember what the word ‘ravage’ means. 🙄 When we got home D went straight to bed and completely ignored me. He was asleep before I even got undressed. okay, maybe I need to lay a bit of groundwork here. It may get more than a bit personal, so if that bothers you please stop reading now. 🙂 D and I have been together for 14 years. We have been through a lot of crap, and a lot of good times, like any couple. We have 5 kids together, and we are also foster parents. We’ve done a lot of work to make our marriage strong, and we are both faithful spouses. With, that said, I have to say that D has always been somewhat insecure, as long as I’ve known him. I compliment him, encourage him, building him up at every opportunity, but he just doesn’t seem to have a good understanding of his personal worth. And he is always aggravated by any attention that I receive from other men. One time a guy at a video rental store told me my hair looked nice, and D got very jealous. It was the sort of compliment you pay to your aunt at a family reunion, no sexual innuendo at all. When he gets upset about something he completely retreats. Sometimes leaves the room, sometimes just shuts down conversationally and refuses to talk to me. He waits for the situation to blow over, and then acts like nothing happened. It is a pattern that drives me nuts, because we can never get to the bottom of anything unless I force it. In this way I feel like he needs as much parenting from me as our children do. I really don’t feel like there’s anything I can do to fix that part of our marriage, other than what I’m already doing. I refuse to give him a co-dependent outlet for this crap, or to enable it in any way. For most of our marriage I have been the aggressor, and the pursuer. Looking back I wish I had not pursued that course to such an extent, because although it was fun, it set a pattern that did not require much from D when it came to pursuing what he wanted, especially sexually. About 2 and a half years ago, he just seemed to lose all interest and desire. In the interim, we may have been intimate half a dozen times. Most people ask right off the bat if he’s having an affair, and after a lot of careful consideration I have to say no. I really don’t think so. None of his activities or behavioral patterns suggest it to me. I really just think he lost interest. He claims that as he approached 40 his sex drive just tanked. He has gone through quite a bit of testing, and nobody can find a reason why this is so. He changed his diet (now we eat paleo), began working out and got quite fit, takes supplements and vitamins, etc. Nothing seems to make any difference. Staying faithful to my husband has been one of the biggest struggles of my life. In the 14 years we have been together, I have never touched another man, although the opportunities come along quite frequently. I am a very sexual person, and long dry spells make me absolutely crazy. So, on to the party last night. This was not D’s first exposure to this mix. I wear this mix a lot. The cops, the IS-A, the I-Shine, all in the same proportions, although some of the scent was different this time. It would be my expectation that this mix would inspire a protective instinct, even possessiveness. I would expect it to inspire him to stake his claim and ardently pursue what was being suggested pheromonally. Instead what I got was a petulant temper tantrum. When we are out together, just the two of us, his response to this mix is negligible. He most often acts as if he doesn’t notice anything different. When we are out with good friends, he gets more jovial and relaxed. Last night he got really out of whack…same mix, different people. Most of them were people from his work, although it wasn’t a work function, per se. Perhaps it was the company that made him so wonkers? Could it be that he felt threatened by the guys from his work? He is in management at his work; most of the people there were underlings. One was his own supervisor, but they are buddies and do stuff together a lot. In my opinion, D was the most polished, most attractive and fit man at the gathering. I can’t see a reason why he would be intimidated by any of those guys. I feel like I’m rambling here, I hope some of this is making sense. So, thoughts? Just lay it out there plain. ---
**Author:** ![CelticPrince](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/celticprince/32/397_2.png) [@CelticPrince](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CelticPrince)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2013, 8:23pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/30 "2013-05-12T20:23:18Z")
Hi MoonlightBliss, Im very sorry to hear about your situation. Sorry i dont know what to say. Im 48, and Im not even joking, I think I turned down sex with a willing partner maybe twice in my life. So I am at a loss to understand why he is not interested. A Couple of thoughts… -Medical? When you do get busy, does he have trouble performing? It is common for some men in their 40’s to have sexual performance issues. Good news there are treatments for that. If he cant perform, then perhaps that is why he avoids sex. This would seem to fit his M.O. of avoiding problems and going into a shell. If this sounds like it may be a possibility, encourage him to see a doctor. Have them check testosterone level. -Tend to agree with you re is he is having an affair. Doesn’t sound like that to me. Most of the affairs I have heard about are because they are not getting enough sex, or none at all. From what you say, it sounds like you are good to go if he is. If its not one of these, I don’t know. Puzzling to me… ---
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2013, 9:31pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/31 "2013-05-12T21:31:42Z")
Medical - probably not. D had his testosterone level checked a couple of months ago, results were above normal for his age. I think it tested normal for a man 10 years younger, if I remember right. He has never had a problem performing, although his stamina has declined as our sex life tapered off. It was his own idea to speak with his doctor about this lack of interest, and explore some options. After the test results came back so favorable, he decided to go herbal in his treatment options. Using supplements of maca root, ashwagandha, horny goat weed, yohimbe… I’ve lost track of all the things he’s tried…none of them seemed to make a difference at all. Am I really in a position now where I have to resign myself to celibacy? I dearly love this man, but a sex-less future is not pleasing to me. ---
**Author:** ![CelticPrince](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/celticprince/32/397_2.png) [@CelticPrince](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CelticPrince)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2013, 9:53pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/32 "2013-05-12T21:53:22Z")
At least he is trying some things..horny goat weed?? Really? 🙂 I think the fact that he is taking these supplements confirms that he knows he has a problem, and he wants to do something about it, which is encouraging. Also, back to the party, I think it is also encouraging that it apparently bothered him that other men were hitting on you. I was at a party last summer and a couple who are friends of a friend of mine were there, and another friend told me they were probably going to get divorced. She looked great, guys were talking to her, flirting with her, etc and her husband saw it all and it didnt bother him in the least. My point is that maybe start getting worried when he doesnt get pissed off when other men ogle you… And to answer your question, no. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Dragon](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/miss_dragon/32/866_2.png) [@Miss\_Dragon](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Miss_Dragon)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2013, 12:56pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/33 "2013-05-13T12:56:53Z")
Thanks for the back story. That sounds like a really rough situation you are in, you have my sympathies. I don’t know if you’ve heard about this or not, but perhaps you might be interested in trying something a little more out-of-the-box. There is anecdotal evidence of this being wildly effective, but it hasn’t been very widely researched. Basically, it’s using copulins to their full effectiveness, the way nature intended. Not through the nose, but through fluids. If your husband has had a vasectomy, there’s a chance it might not work. Here is the website of the main scientist who was researching the process: Home Here is a very detailed blog about a lady who successfully saved her marriage through use of this process. The layout is a bit difficult to navigate, the first entries are at the bottom of the page, and you have to click the “newer” link at the bottom to see the next page. [Save Your Marriage](http://www.angelfire.com/alt2/copulin/bond/index.blog?start=1089052002) Hope this helps. ---
**Author:** ![CelticPrince](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/celticprince/32/397_2.png) [@CelticPrince](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CelticPrince)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2013, 1:41pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/34 "2013-05-13T13:41:31Z")
Miss Dragon, Just read through the links you sent..hmmm…I guess I get the science, and I want to be supportive and respectful, but I dont know- Its not for me. MoonlightBliss will have to decide if this is a viable approach for her relationship. Just seems that the technique is a bit emasculating. I operate utilizing the “Ladies-first” school of lovemaking. If I take care of all of her needs first, the rest takes care of it itself. Extra orgasms after that are a bonus. Climaxing simultaneously is the pinacle. Its a powerful bond… It just seems to me that the author is a lifetime member of the “She-woman men haters club”. (IMHO) But hey, live and let live I always say. If it works, great. Just seems like shes turning a supposedly “beautiful thang” into a lot of work. ---
**Author:** ![Miss\_Dragon](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/miss_dragon/32/866_2.png) [@Miss\_Dragon](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Miss_Dragon)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2013, 1:52pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/35 "2013-05-13T13:52:26Z")
I agree that the author of the blog is a little embittered. And I’m also very glad to hear that you are a decent man who treats a lady right. In Moonlight’s situation, she’s unfortunately not getting the beautiful thang she deserves. It might be a bit of a radical approach, but perhaps behavior modification might be needed to get things back on track. ---
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2013, 7:50pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/36 "2013-05-13T19:50:26Z")
I’m off to go reading! Thanks for the suggestions and support. I appreciate you and the freedom to vent my situation here. ---
**Author:** ![MoonlightBliss](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/moonlightbliss/32/1641_2.png) [@MoonlightBliss](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MoonlightBliss)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2013, 9:45pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/37 "2013-05-13T21:45:24Z")
Okay, wow! I’m a little blown away! This is a very unconventional idea. I’m not even sure what to think. I’m a little rattled by the whole idea, for several reasons. First of all, there is the premise that one spouse has the privilege and right to influence/control the other. Second, … never mind, I’m still stuck on the first one. Miss Dragon, thank you for sharing it with me. At the very least, I know more than I knew before. I will have to think about this for a while. Here’s something that occurred to me earlier today. I’m going to throw it out there in case it rings a bell with anyone. D’s dramatic decrease in drive and desire occurred almost simultaneously with kicking a serious porn addiction. He had been an avid, and addicted viewer for 25+ years, and decided that he didn’t appreciate the influence it had on his life and behavior. He gave it up at around the same time as his sexual drive diminished. I can’t remember the exact timing. I would say it was all within 2-3 months at the most. Does this strike a chord with anyone? ---
**Author:** ![CelticPrince](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/celticprince/32/397_2.png) [@CelticPrince](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CelticPrince)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2013, 8:15am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/38 "2013-05-14T08:15:25Z")
Hi MoonlightBliss, Im no psychologist, but I have a friend who is. I will ask her and get back to you here. But..it seems to me that the timing of all this is a little too coincidental. It is not uncommon to see people change when they go through a big life changing event. I had a good friend from High school who I also went to college with, and we actually did some business together. He had a major drinking problem and it got so bad that I organized an intervention for him. It was a hellish 9 hour intervention, but at the end we got him to get in the car with us and we drove him to treatment. Fast forward to today, he successfully completed treatment and has been sober for almost 15 years. The downside was though, that it drastically changed our friendship. We went from best friends to now where I maybe see/talk to him once a year. It sucks that we are not close anymore, but if that is the price I have to pay for saving his life then so be it. I would not want to be sitting here right now wishing I would have done something, because he was definitely in a death spiral. Might need to bring in the professionals… 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![CelticPrince](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/celticprince/32/397_2.png) [@CelticPrince](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CelticPrince)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2013, 7:54pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076/39 "2013-05-20T19:54:15Z")
Moonlight, haven’t had a chance to talk to my psychologist friend yet, but I did come across an article that sort of addresses the porn thing discussed earlier: [Porn-Induced Sexual Dysfunction: A Growing Problem | Psychology Today](http://m.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201107/porn-induced-sexual-dysfunction-growing-problem) Not exactly the same as your situation at home, but does show a link. Maybe he just needs more time, idk.. Keep trying 🙂 [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/off-and-running/58076.md?page=1)