# Partying without mones different than partying with **URL:** \ **Category:** Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports\ **Created:** [September 25, 2011, 5:55pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529 "2011-09-25T17:55:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![lamentofking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lamentofking](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/lamentofking)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 5:55pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/1 "2011-09-25T17:55:59Z")
So I went to this college party last night without mones . I hadn’t gone without them for a while . Anyways I went with some of my gf’s and we got there and its crowded as usual . Hardly any room to dance comfortably . Now usually when I’m wearing mones my friends will want to twerk on me (front to back dancing, you might want to google it) . But I went without them last night and none asked like usual . Well it was my first time going out with specifically that group of females so that could be it . Anyway the DJ is playing party and twerk songs the whole time and some guys are dancing with girls, some are on the wall . I was on the wall but just every now and then moving through the crowd . Half-expecting to dance with a stranger . I just get this feeling that you can’t just dance with someone you don’t know (or girls don’t want to at least, I don’t mind) . I’ve only ever asked a few times and I get shot down . So I’m just waiting for one to come ask me to dance with her . Anyway here is the point of the thread that made me post all of this . A twerk song comes on “Bring it Back” by Travis Porter . And this girl right beside me that I don’t even know comes to me bends over and goes to work . Afterwards I’m like really ? So in order to dance with a girl at a college party I have to wait for them to ask me or I have to just stand there and wait for a stranger to come over ? Didn’t make sense to me . But it made me ponder it cause one of my gf’s was dancing with a guy she didn’t know . He was an upperclassmen though so she was probably attracted to him . So do you all think having or not having mones is the variable that’ll determine if girls you know/your gf’s will want to dance with you or if it’s strangers that will dance with you ? ---
**Author:** ![thegentleman](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/thegentleman/32/1770_2.png) [@thegentleman](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/thegentleman)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 6:11pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/2 "2011-09-25T18:11:14Z")
It’s just the way chicks and dudes roll… most guys spend their time on death row watching the dance floor…and most chicks will NOT bother with them so you got lucky. I’ve been out with a girl I saw pretty seriously..and she would just hop on the dance floor and go to grinding on a dude who was with a group of guy and girl friends just for shits and giggles. Girls get caught up in the moment and want to dance…guys are usually just too intimidated. If you can’t dance..learn…if you can get out there and move your opportunities will increase with our without mones ---
**Author:** ![lamentofking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lamentofking](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/lamentofking)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 6:18pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/3 "2011-09-25T18:18:17Z")
> [@thegentleman](#): > > It’s just the way chicks and dudes roll… most guys spend their time on death row watching the dance floor…and most chicks will NOT bother with them so you got lucky. > I’ve been out with a girl I saw pretty seriously..and she would just hop on the dance floor and go to grinding on a dude who was with a group of guy and girl friends just for shits and giggles. > Girls get caught up in the moment and want to dance…guys are usually just too intimidated. > If you can’t dance..learn…if you can get out there and move your opportunities will increase with our without mones I would say I got lucky too . However most of the girls dancing with guys involved the guys already on the wall . Some guys were on the floor but took the girl they were dancing with over to the wall . I can dance but around here people want to play mostly twerk songs . And the few dance songs they did play it was hard to really move cause it was overcrowded in that house . My thing is that if all it takes to dance with a stranger is to just ask em then I’d be fine with that except I get shot down each time . I mean I’m not just gonna go down a line of girls and ask each one til someone says yes . It wouldn’t look to good if 5 other girls rejected me ya know ? ---
**Author:** ![Jabez](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/jabez/32/2193_2.png) [@Jabez](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Jabez)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 9:49pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/4 "2011-09-25T21:49:26Z")
Sounds like you lack confidence my friend. ---
**Author:** ![lamentofking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lamentofking](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/lamentofking)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 11:00pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/5 "2011-09-25T23:00:44Z")
> [@Jabez](#): > > Sounds like you lack confidence my friend. It’s not even a confidence thing . I mean would you do that ? (asking strangers til you find one that says yes) . There probably already on the dance floor with guys they already know . ---
**Author:** ![mariocisneros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d2c977/32.png) [@mariocisneros](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mariocisneros)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2011, 11:47pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/6 "2011-09-25T23:47:00Z")
Hey bro, I think you should read about body language, IOI, PUA, how to talk to anyone. You definitively have to approach girls and learn how to open groups. You were lucky, but standing still waiting for a girl to approach you wont get you anywhere 99% of the time. Read on some PUA forums… Best of lucks bro! ---
**Author:** ![Jabez](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/jabez/32/2193_2.png) [@Jabez](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Jabez)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 12:23am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/7 "2011-09-26T00:23:22Z")
Yah I do it all the time. Its just about being secure about who you are as a man and a person and rolling with the punches. If you care about the outcome then you are going to have less fun and come off as needy. Act like your the master of every situation and any girl would be lucky to have you. Its just not being a chicken shit. ---
**Author:** ![lamentofking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lamentofking](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/lamentofking)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 3:44am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/8 "2011-09-26T03:44:27Z")
> [@mariocisneros](#): > > Hey bro, I think you should read about body language, IOI, PUA, how to talk to anyone. > > You definitively have to approach girls and learn how to open groups. You were lucky, but standing still waiting for a girl to approach you wont get you anywhere 99% of the time. > > Read on some PUA forums… Best of lucks bro! PUA ? Sorry I don’t know where that is . And it’s probably somewhere obvious but could you link me to it please ? > [@Jabez](#): > > Yah I do it all the time. Its just about being secure about who you are as a man and a person and rolling with the punches. If you care about the outcome then you are going to have less fun and come off as needy. Act like your the master of every situation and any girl would be lucky to have you. Its just not being a chicken shit. You do huh ? Ok I’ll give it a shot . I used to do it but it wasn’t one girl after the other . Like after a rejection I gave myself recovery time then went after another . ---
**Author:** ![Jabez](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/jabez/32/2193_2.png) [@Jabez](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Jabez)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 5:27am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/9 "2011-09-26T05:27:06Z")
[Instant Jerk](https://a314.com/product/instant-jerk/) will help with that my friend. Haha ---
**Author:** ![Walc](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/walc/32/2210_2.png) [@Walc](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Walc)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 7:23am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/10 "2011-09-26T07:23:23Z")
> [@lamentofking](#): > > PUA ? Sorry I don’t know where that is . And it’s probably somewhere obvious but could you link me to it please ? PUA is an acronym for Pick-Up Artist. There are a bunch of different ‘schools’ out there, and I really don’t know enough to give any advice to which school or which renowned pick-up artist you should read first. But if you want an easily read and fun intro to the subject, read Neil Strauss The Game. It may not paint some of those guys in the best light though, and I don’t know if Strauss is beeing fair or if he’s sacrificing truth for a fun story. ---
**Author:** ![alex398](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/77aa72/32.png) [@alex398](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/alex398)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 8:09pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/11 "2011-09-26T20:09:25Z")
haha, ok trust me you do NOT want to get that book(the game) i got it and tried to follow his advice and man did it ever suck. Almost all of neils advice dosent work, all the open a group the wy he says it and stuff is really bad advice. PUA stuff is useless “unless” your really experienced and mega confident. Even then.. it takes these guys months to get laid using there crappy techniques and sometimes its just luck. Heres a good example: Peacocking, the stupidest “technique” to supposedly attract women, in real life when girls see that they laugh there asses off at the guy. (Peacockcing is wearing something very bizare or colorful to attract attention) Neils pua mentor mystery uses this peacocking thing. Another example, go up to a girl and compliment her finger nails and theyll fall for you,just stupid shit like that lol. ---
**Author:** ![lamentofking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lamentofking](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/lamentofking)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 9:28pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/12 "2011-09-26T21:28:30Z")
> [@Walc](#): > > PUA is an acronym for Pick-Up Artist. There are a bunch of different ‘schools’ out there, and I really don’t know enough to give any advice to which school or which renowned pick-up artist you should read first. But if you want an easily read and fun intro to the subject, read Neil Strauss The Game. It may not paint some of those guys in the best light though, and I don’t know if Strauss is beeing fair or if he’s sacrificing truth for a fun story. Ah ok . Thanks . And to support everyone else’s point about me not dancing with any girls while standing on the wall, the girl that did dance with me was when I WASNT on the wall . I was in the middle of the dance floor with a bunch of other people . 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Walc](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/walc/32/2210_2.png) [@Walc](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Walc)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2011, 10:26pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/13 "2011-09-26T22:26:45Z")
> [@alex398](#): > > haha, ok trust me you do NOT want to get that book(the game) (…) Yeah, I should’ve been more clear that I didn’t mean to recommend The Game as a book to _learn_ PUA from, more to get an idea of what it may be about. I haven’t really read much PUA material to be honest… ---
**Author:** ![lamentofking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lamentofking](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/lamentofking)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 7:19pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/14 "2011-09-27T19:19:13Z")
So what artists can be recommended then ? ---
**Author:** ![thegentleman](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/thegentleman/32/1770_2.png) [@thegentleman](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/thegentleman)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 7:59pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/15 "2011-09-27T19:59:09Z")
> [@alex398](#): > > haha, ok trust me you do NOT want to get that book(the game) i got it and tried to follow his advice and man did it ever suck. Almost all of neils advice dosent work, all the open a group the wy he says it and stuff is really bad advice. PUA stuff is useless “unless” your really experienced and mega confident. Even then.. it takes these guys months to get laid using there crappy techniques and sometimes its just luck. Heres a good example: Peacocking, the stupidest “technique” to supposedly attract women, in real life when girls see that they laugh there asses off at the guy. (Peacockcing is wearing something very bizare or colorful to attract attention) Neils pua mentor mystery uses this peacocking thing. > Another example, go up to a girl and compliment her finger nails and theyll fall for you,just stupid shit like that lol. You really have no clue as to what you’re talking about. There are guys on here who use the M3 model and nothing else and have amazing success with it…one of the guys I roll with he too uses the M3 model and has major success with it…if you knew what you were talking about, the M3 model is built off of sales / persuasion techniques that have been around for years. Don’t wanna sound harsh, and I’m not a Myster / Neil fan boy. if I were to pick a “school” it would be more of David Dangelo inner game stuff that I tend to follow and support…just when people claim something doesn’t work or is out of date shows me they’re talking out of their asses. Yeah it does take some time to get good. Some people evolve faster than others. Others have years of issues they have to work through before they start to see some success in pick up. Even in the game it took Neil quite some time before he got laid the first time, but after that it wasn’t as difficult each subsequent time. There is no magic pill out there. It all requires some effort on your part… now back to the OP… RE: Confidence, approach anxiety etc. There really is no other way to get over it than just conditioning yourself to not be phased by it by going out and approaching as many women as you can every single day. There is a reason a lot of people suggest doing a 30 day challenge and going out and doing approaches for 30 days straight with no break. Because as soon as you take a break, somedays even if its just for a quick bite to eat, you lose momentum. When me and my boys roll, and we start to get “cold.” I remind them…an object that’s in motion tends to stay in motion." which is just a reminder that we gotta keep moving. We’ve done it all…we’ve done nights of sloppy approaches where we just went up and said or did the stupidest thing that came to mind. Did it get us laid? Nope. but it did help us to understand that it really doesn’t matter what you say…its how you say it. I could take the world’s most successful pick up line and walk up to a decent looking girl and if I’m nervous and stuttering over it she’s not gonna buy it…and then I could just walk up to a girl and with all confidence say…“I’m hung like an infant.” And she’d eat it up. I remember just agreeing one time with something stupid a friend was saying about me to a woman and he asked her…“do you believe it?” And she was like…“No…he was just too confident when he said ‘yes.’” Even if you don’t check out pua materials. You will have to move away from the wall you’re leaning on in life and introduce yourself to women. Do it at the checkstand, in line at Starbucks, at the DMV etc. Just talk. You don’t have to try to pick up or dance with every girl you talk to…just go out with the mindset that “I’m a great guy to talk to and I’m gonna let these people know that.” EDITED TO ADD: What has hours upon hours of approaching done for me? When a girl blows me off, no matter how nice or mean I look at it as another notch in my belt…the meaner she is the more funny and interesting story I get to tell later. ---
**Author:** ![thegentleman](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/thegentleman/32/1770_2.png) [@thegentleman](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/thegentleman)\ **Post date:** [September 27, 2011, 8:02pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/16 "2011-09-27T20:02:47Z")
> [@lamentofking](#): > > So what artists can be recommended then ? I would suggest you go look at [rsdnation.com](http://rsdnation.com) They have a well rounded line of products that focus not just on technique, but inner game as well. The company was started by papa and tyler durden from the book the game. And just to clarify, The Game is a narrative, its a story. It does have some technique in it, but not enough to teach you what you need to learn. that’s what the book the Mystery Method was for, or Mystery’s follow up, The Pick Up Artist, which is also a narrative, but an instructional one. ---
**Author:** ![Maidenfan01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Maidenfan01](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Maidenfan01)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 3:09am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/17 "2011-09-28T03:09:17Z")
The gentlemans advice is great. If your really suffering from shyness, try the 30 day challenge. I believe its by Neil Strauss. Some of the stuff in there is absolutely ridiculous, but that’s the point. Also, don’t ask to dance, just do it. A good sales technique (which applies here!) is not letting them think that no is an option. If they get the chance to say no, they most likely will, if you just assume they are interested, they will most likely be interested. People are easily influenced 😛. ---
**Author:** ![lamentofking](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@lamentofking](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/lamentofking)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 3:12am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/18 "2011-09-28T03:12:40Z")
> [@Maidenfan01](#): > > Also, don’t ask to dance, just do it. You mean let her see me approaching her right ? I don’t think just rushing onto the dance floor and rubbing my junk on her from behind without her seeing is such a good idea . lol . ---
**Author:** ![thegentleman](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/thegentleman/32/1770_2.png) [@thegentleman](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/thegentleman)\ **Post date:** [September 28, 2011, 3:12pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/partying-without-mones-different-than-partying-with/52529/19 "2011-09-28T15:12:36Z")
lament…go to a country bar and just watch the guys there. they’ll just walk up to a girl grab their hand and lead them out onto the dance floor…the girls are always smiling and looking back at their friends like they’re just so excited. Now that’s not necessarily the way you wanna do it all the time…but yeah you do have to approach women to meet or talk to them. Another good way is just like you were already doing…get together with a group of friends guys and gals and be out on the floor dancing and just merge your set with another set you’re interested in and start dancing with them. In all fairness, when I go out dancing normally I’m with someone already. But the few times this last year that I wasn’t…yeah I just looked at a girl and said…“let’s go” and made a motion with my head towards the floor and started walking and 9 times out of 10 we were already dancing before we even hit the floor.