# pheromone fried rice **URL:** \ **Category:** Men's Journals\ **Created:** [January 5, 2009, 9:16am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524 "2009-01-05T09:16:16Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [March 29, 2009, 10:24pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/121 "2009-03-29T22:24:43Z")
**house party** 3s 203 all around neck 1s ih back neck 1s ammo back neck dabbed 272 applicator tip to jawline 1s 301 right side of neck felt a little warm, maybe it was the 301? whatever it was, if it was on the front of my neck i probably would’ve sweated. with ammo on the back and 301 on the side, it was bearable. sarah loved it immediately. all her female friends enjoyed it as well. didn’t approach too many girls; they all approached me or hung out with us. no noticeable reactions from guys. **the kicker** over the past few weeks or so sarah has been saying “i like you” a lot. last night as we were cuddling (had some guests over so we didn’t do much) she said “i really like you.” i always say it back. well duh. of course we like each other. why is this significant? i’m going to apply some male logic here to a female action and see if i get anywhere. 1. it’s always said at emotionally open times: cuddling, getting together after a fight, sharing a special moment/thing together, etc. 2. we mean it. deep looks into the other person’s eyes and a tone of voice that means business. usually preceded and followed with a hug and kiss. 3. it’s being said more often. started out as just a “random” comment one day, grew to once a week or so, now it’s probably once every time we’re together. 3a. use of intensifiers – i like you a lot, i really like you, etc. i think this is all leading up to the magic three words being said. can’t comment too much on that now but when it happens, i have a post ready for it. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2009, 1:23am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/122 "2009-03-31T01:23:57Z")
used 1s 203, tuth, and ih last night when sarah slept over. the tuth went on the side of my neck and it didn’t make me feel hot like last time, which is good. hopefully i’m getting used to it. sarah loved it instantly. last night was my makeup night – earlier i rocked an awesome mix only to find out she was off limits. now she’s ready to go again and trust me, she was certainly ready to go last night. whole bunch of new happenings between the sheets. i think it was the trusted “ih plus anything” combo for those deep hits, then some 203 on top to finish up the sig. still not sure what to do for this week. i might return to some old favorites, maybe layer on some putes with 301-304 or 203. i think i’ve used 203 every mix day for a week or so now; part of me kinda feels bad for “wasting” it but hey, why get it if you don’t use it? ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [March 31, 2009, 8:47pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/123 "2009-03-31T20:47:25Z")
good testing class was canceled today so i’ll be taking the daytime off. nice little streak of this going on. i may just take week off (except for nights) to give myself a break. sarah slept over last night and i used the half first spray of my secret free gift. i have a post typed up on the results once i’m ready to “release the secret.” i’d like to test a bit more without any outside influences. she is sleeping over again tonight; i think it’s time for some p83/203 fun. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 4, 2009, 3:30am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/124 "2009-04-04T03:30:50Z")
just checking in. not too many happenings this week except for getting busy with school. i ended up going with a dab of a314 to classes; sometimes i added some 104 for fragrance. on thursday night i went out with 1s each of 301, 2, 3, and 4, and taa. smaller party crew this week as many people are busy with school like i am. saw a group of girls that used to hang out with us and they were all very friendly towards me. one girl even approached me randomly later in the night and danced with me, i thought it was a random drunk girl before i turned around. at one point in the night about half our table got up to get refills and use the restroom. these two girls (blonde, 21-22, hb7 and hb6) came over and asked if they could sit down for a while at the empty seats, and i said sure. the hb7 was just tired, the hb6 was pretty drunk. for a few minutes they sat in peace and i kept talking to my buddies. many of them have gfs and i wanted to avoid the situation of them returning from the restroom and seeing their bfs opening random girls. as they sat, they kept looking at me. eventually i turned to the friend nearest me and said, hey, let’s talk to these girls. we did and made a short round of intros (too loud, didn’t hear anything) and we started a small card game. hb7 sat across from me and looked at me a whole lot. hb6 occasionally looked at me and the rest of the time just started in my general direction due to her drunkness. i’m standing. out of the corner of my eye i see a girl approach the table (she knew the girls) and start to fan herself with a drink menu or something. no big deal there. all of sudden she disappears from view but i can still feel the breeze from her fanning herself. i turn around just slightly and i’m mere inches away from her. i was a bit surprised and said hi, and i don’t think she heard me. the weird thing is she wasn’t facing me or anything; i think she just wanted to stand by me. later some of her other friends came over and she talked with them, still standing very close to me. i’m pretty sure she turned around a few times as well. then she left. back to the card game. the girls were opening up more; i think hb7 was on “the hunt” and once she saw nobody at the table was interested, she put her hunting attitude down and relaxed a bit with the card game. hb6 had to pee or something so they both got up and said they would be back. i still didn’t hear them but i read their lips. i think hb7 caught this because she walked over, got right into my ear, said “we’ll be back,” and then kinda lingered for a bit. they never came back. some guy tapped me on the shoulder and i turned around to talk to him, and i saw the girls just 15 feet away on the dance floor with their friends. no matter. definitely something at work with the mx 301-4 series and taa. i purposely wanted to defy good testing rules by putting on a spray of each so i could see the combined effect. that pulled the girls in and i think taa contributed to the lack of personal space as demonstrated by the random girl standing so close to me. good ioi and dihl from other random girls too as i walked by them. i’ll probably do the same thing next week (take it easy). it helps me get in tune more. still not many chances to test my secret free gift but if they arise, i’ll be sure to catch them. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 10, 2009, 2:01pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/125 "2009-04-10T14:01:07Z")
i’ve been doing some testing with 201 (my secret free gift), you can read the results here: [mx201: the girlfriend-izer](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/mx201-the-girlfriend-izer/27914) school has hit a workload plateau so i might need to continue my scaled back phero use and testing, but i’ll try to check in as often as possible. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2009, 2:17pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/126 "2009-04-15T14:17:00Z")
**mx203: my girlfriend-izer** she wants it. she _needs_ it. bad. one day she went not even half a day before saying “i really miss you.” we had just gotten out of the same bed not long before that. it draws her in. nevermind what 201 does. it’s not a magnet like 292 either. you remember the original star wars where the larger imperial ships could lock on to a small rebel ship and slowly pull it in? it’s like that. 292 burns quick, and that is part of the reason it works so well. too quick for my needs. 201 is happy-go-lucky. good for topping off a good day but there’s no connection mechanism there. 272 comes close – nice connection, good feeling – but i feel it’s more targeted for the status aspect (a la renny’s 272 + a314 thread). **what is it about 203?** is it the hair color? the limiting factor in those types of tests is that i can’t get as close to a brunette as i am with sarah, thus i can’t test at the same level. going back to my original conclusion though, hair color changes; personality does not. that’s out. there’s also the factor of congruency. i got 203 to establish, improve, and maintain ltr with sarah. 203 alone won’t accomplish these things. we all know this. first there has to be a change with me. not to brag or anything but i think i’m a pretty good bf. solid relationships so far and a good start with sarah without 203. the introduction of 203 meant i had to jump into the deep end. i had to be _the best_. you can’t pull someone in that close and not bring your best. so i brought my best. i really tuned into her, took care of her, made sure we were on the same page. when we became official about a month ago i stepped it up again. now i not only had to bring my best to her, but to her friends, coworkers, roommates, etc. every girl wants a guy that makes her proud to say “that’s my boyfriend.” i want to be that guy. i _am_ that guy. likewise, i have to step it up to my friends too. i command a high level of respect in my social circle and my friends look to me for various things. when sarah is feeling bad, they will see how i comfort her. when we get into a fight, they will see how we resolve things. when we’re walking around, hands held tight, smiles on our faces, they will see just exactly how and why we’re such a successful couple. 203 really is a helping hand. this is the stuff that newbies look for when they make their intros – how can pheros help me? i’ve found a use for everything in my collection, from the obvious ones like ammo and a314 to some of the ptives and a few customized layered mixes. 203 works for and _with_ me. i can use it, shape it, or just wear it and let it flow through sarah and see what happens. i like 203. proudly introducing the return of jayarea. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2009, 12:39am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/127 "2009-04-17T00:39:53Z")
1s 203 ifm ammo ih front/left side of neck (right in sarah’s face while cuddling) bed time this kinda backfired on me a bit at first. long story short, ammo did practically nothing. we had been away from each other for a few days and i thought that the 203 + ammo would give us a good spark for the night. i goofed a bit earlier in the day so i wanted to throw in some ifm for good measure, and then top it all off with ih to drive it deep. well, 203 girlfriendized her as it always does and ifm made her comfortable, and ih drove that feeling so deep that she became very sleepy (think extended cuddling) not long after she came over. the “comfort” part of the mix worked well but once it got out of my control, the ammo was overpowered. there was some light kissing in bed but with her face constantly in my neck, she was out in a matter of minutes. not one to let a mix go to waste, i turned the failed ammo into a slow build ammo. right before she fell asleep i threw in some more sexual kisses and let my hands run around a bit. all through the night i would gently touch her or whisper things into her ear and she would respond with a content-sounding purr in her sleep. as i saw it, she had her face in my neck all night, getting basically a constant stream of ammo. throw in some sexual kino and pre-foreplay foreplay, and you’re bound to get somewhere, right? my hard work paid off in the morning. we woke up about two hours earlier than the alarm, and when this happens, it usually/always means we have some activities in mind and allow time for it. you can use your imagination to predict what happened next, but allow me to mention that she had two (yep, two) of the strongest orgasms ever in our time together, and probably ever in my history of girls having orgasms with me. i guess after a whole night of being built up with ammo, you have a lot to release. 😉 **what’s the point?** a few people have mentioned 203 + ifm as a good combo, and general knowledge of ptives and mx’s predict they work well together. **point 1** : we can see in this case that 203 and ifm did have some, if not most, of the primary effects. on an established gf they provided a sense of extreme comfort, which ultimately led to being tired. with a random or not so close girl, i figure this would lead to some cuddling (“need to be held”) or the start of a close bond, both of which are good starts to further pursuing. **point 2** : we can also see that sometimes, just because a + b work well together and b + c work well together, doesn’t mean that a + b + c will work well together. 203 and ammo makes her melt. ammo and ih makes her super horny. ih and ifm comforts her and brings her close. one would think that a combo of all those would bring her close and make her horny until the point of melting. at least in this instance, this was not the case. 203, ifm, and ih greatly overpowered ammo. the effects of the first 3 were unfortunately not in my favor; if they made her excited or hyper or something this might be a different story. **point 3** : going off point 2, just because something doesn’t go your way doesn’t mean you have to give up. for the most part, there’s always another way to make your mix / part of the mix work. i could’ve fallen asleep and hoped for the best with the ammo, or called it a bust. this would be waiting for a hit. as all good phero users know, we can’t wait around for hits (unless it’s a test); we have to go out and make them. i took a primary loss with ammo and turned it into a secondary effect. always stay on your toes and be creative. ---
**Author:** ![health78l](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f19dbf/32.png) [@health78l](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/health78l)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2009, 5:28pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/128 "2009-04-17T17:28:52Z")
Thanks guy , I will keep reading [https://www.revenuecents.com/upload/50/1239783018/random.gif](https://www.revenuecents.com/upload/50/1239783018/random.gif) ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2009, 12:34am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/129 "2009-04-18T00:34:26Z")
> [@health78l](#): > > Thanks guy , I will keep reading > > [https://www.revenuecents.com/upload/50/1239783018/random.gif](https://www.revenuecents.com/upload/50/1239783018/random.gif) thank you for reading. hopefully you can pick up some things on what to do or not to do in your phero journey. **you don’t date the girl, you date her friends** 3s 203 front neck 3s 292 back neck 1s 272, 201 sides neck 10pm a few of sarah’s good friends were celebrating their birthdays last night. i can totally dominate sarah with a mix but i felt that i needed to include her friends as well, since it was their night. 203 was for sarah, 292 was for everyone – i wanted to give off a “that’s a cool boyfriend” vibe. 272 and 201 rounded things out. good hits all around. lots of ioi from her friends (in a “friend” way). there weren’t too many guys around, just a few from the party crew, and they’re already used to my status and social aspect. met up with hb9 randomly and she loved the mix, but i don’t think there’s a mix she doesn’t like. **what’s the point? point 1:** friends of a girlfriend are like walking shit tests – you could be a wonder of the world in your gf’s eyes but if you fail with them, they will hound your gf endlessly. she can either ignore them (depending on how good of friends they are) or listen to them, and then you’re SOL. on the flip side, if you completely win them over, they will report good things back to the gf and you’ll score more points. points are good. 292, 272, and 201 helped me get some points. i like points. **point 2:** 292. ---
**Author:** ![pherophreak](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/pherophreak/32/1531_2.png) [@pherophreak](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/pherophreak)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2009, 11:30pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/130 "2009-04-18T23:30:30Z")
> [@jayarea](#): > > thank you for reading. hopefully you can pick up some things on what to do or not to do in your phero journey. > > **you don’t date the girl, you date her friends** > > 3s 203 front neck > 3s 292 back neck > 1s 272, 201 sides neck > 10pm > > a few of sarah’s good friends were celebrating their birthdays last night. i can totally dominate sarah with a mix but i felt that i needed to include her friends as well, since it was their night. 203 was for sarah, 292 was for everyone – i wanted to give off a “that’s a cool boyfriend” vibe. 272 and 201 rounded things out. > > good hits all around. lots of ioi from her friends (in a “friend” way). there weren’t too many guys around, just a few from the party crew, and they’re already used to my status and social aspect. met up with hb9 randomly and she loved the mix, but i don’t think there’s a mix she doesn’t like. > > **what’s the point? > point 1:** friends of a girlfriend are like walking shit tests – you could be a wonder of the world in your gf’s eyes but if you fail with them, they will hound your gf endlessly. she can either ignore them (depending on how good of friends they are) or listen to them, and then you’re SOL. on the flip side, if you completely win them over, they will report good things back to the gf and you’ll score more points. points are good. 292, 272, and 201 helped me get some points. i like points. > **point 2:** 292. You know who your writing style reminds me of? Tucker Max. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2009, 4:58pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/131 "2009-04-19T16:58:56Z")
> [@pherophreak](#): > > You know who your writing style reminds me of? Tucker Max. i read his book thing once. not a fan of him or what he does or what he says he does, but i guess there are some similarities in the writing style. i gleaned some style from madtater too. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2009, 1:33am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/132 "2009-04-20T01:33:45Z")
**first experience with 200, and 203 = my girlfriend turns into a baby** tried some 200 on friday night, albeit not alone. 1s 203 and then the first spray of 200. no drastically different or adverse effects on anybody. i’ll try to test more this coming week. with my recent run of 203 use, i’ve noticed an amusing trend: whenever it’s on, my girlfriend turns into a babbling, cute-talking, funny-thing-doing small child. she’s normally very mature – a 22 y/o with her head on straight, job in order, heading back to school soon for an advanced degree. hit her with some 203 and a kiss and she goes into cutesy mode. baby noises, puppy kisses, general small child wonder and amazement, etc. i don’t mind it, and at times i’ll even play along as it’s a good way to just have some fun in the day. off day yesterday and today. i might put some 203 on before sarah comes over for bed (yep, it’s pretty much assumed now) and maybe layer it with something. the past few nights i’ve done some a314 to really kick up the boyfriend vibe. enjoy the week. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2009, 12:23am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/133 "2009-04-21T00:23:15Z")
update here: [mx200: 292's sidekick](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/mx200-292s-sidekick/28229) ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 22, 2009, 4:22pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/134 "2009-04-22T16:22:14Z")
used 3s 201 yesterday before heading to the store. guess it was a bad shopping time as nobody was really there. my only hit was from walking past a girl (20’s, brunette, hb7) in one aisle. she may have looked up at me as i passed, i squeezed by pretty close to get past her and a cart. i go another aisle and i was looking at the selection of peanut butter for the longest time (chunky? creamy? low sodium?) when she walked past me. she started staring at me when she rounded the corner into my aisle, kept staring at me as she walked down and past me, took her gaze away to browse some products (i’m still staring at peanut butter but can see out of the corner of my eye), picked something up and looked over at me, figured i was lost in peanut butter and wasn’t gonna say anything, then left. i guess it’s like 292 where you have to be in one place for a while before the effects really kick in. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 23, 2009, 11:06pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/135 "2009-04-23T23:06:30Z")
posting this in my journal right now so i don’t forget. this is what i’ll be wearing out tonight. if it rocks out for me, look for a thread on it in the main section. if it’s only so-so, i’ll just update this. key points: - sarah and i hit a rocky point last night. being completely unbiased here, she was 99.999% / 100% at fault. (long story) we didn’t talk much in the morning but i let her know how extremely disappointed and hurt i felt on the car ride home. she tried to apologize, then later i find out some info from a buddy that makes the situation slightly worse, i let her know, and i haven’t heard from her all day. in the rare case that she’s coming out tonight and willing to be by me, i’ll be wearing ifm to ease things. - given the above fact, i also need some “me” time. some time to breathe, have fun, forget all the stress of life and ltr and women problems, etc. i’m gonna be social tonight, heark back to the early days of my journal. - good impressions. this is probably one of the last big party nights of the school year. gotta go out big. also being good company for some out-of-towners and new friends. with that said, the unofficial mix as of 7pm. 2s 292 back neck 2s ifm back neck 2s 272 front neck 2s 203 front neck 1-2s 200 front neck 1-2s 201 hair 2d a314 jawline maybes: 1s 79, 83, taa hair neroli products first, drydown, game products it’s a bomb just typing it out. yikes. we’ll see what happens. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2009, 2:20am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/136 "2009-04-26T02:20:49Z")
> [@jayarea](#): > > posting this in my journal right now so i don’t forget. this is what i’ll be wearing out tonight. if it rocks out for me, look for a thread on it in the main section. if it’s only so-so, i’ll just update this. > > key points: > > - sarah and i hit a rocky point last night. being completely unbiased here, she was 99.999% / 100% at fault. (long story) we didn’t talk much in the morning but i let her know how extremely disappointed and hurt i felt on the car ride home. she tried to apologize, then later i find out some info from a buddy that makes the situation slightly worse, i let her know, and i haven’t heard from her all day. in the rare case that she’s coming out tonight and willing to be by me, i’ll be wearing ifm to ease things. > - given the above fact, i also need some “me” time. some time to breathe, have fun, forget all the stress of life and ltr and women problems, etc. i’m gonna be social tonight, heark back to the early days of my journal. > - good impressions. this is probably one of the last big party nights of the school year. gotta go out big. also being good company for some out-of-towners and new friends. > > with that said, the unofficial mix as of 7pm. > > 2s 292 back neck > 2s ifm back neck > 2s 272 front neck > 2s 203 front neck > 1-2s 200 front neck > 1-2s 201 hair > 2d a314 jawline > maybes: 1s 79, 83, taa hair > neroli products first, drydown, game products > > it’s a bomb just typing it out. yikes. we’ll see what happens. 😉 this turned out to be a much bigger situation than i anticipated. i drew some resolve from this mix, some other mixes, and personal growth. in order to get some more exposure and input, i decided to post the conclusion in the main forum. > [@pheromones make my life better: a case study](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromones-make-my-life-better-a-case-study/28389): > > posted 4.25.09 for events 4.23 10pm the backstory oh gosh it’s a long one. if i had to sum it up? … sarah did something bad, i got mad at her, we weren’t able to make up in time so she did not come out with me. part of the mix was in preparation of seeing her and easing her back in. the other part of the mix was the “me time” part. we all some time to breathe once in a while. since my gf wasn’t coming out, i threw in some goodies to be extra social. not to spite her or cheat on her or anything… check it out if you haven’t already. real eye-opening experiences for me. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 26, 2009, 11:59pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/137 "2009-04-26T23:59:14Z")
real nice to get everything settled this week. pretty lax week coming up, sarah and i are doing very well, my phero antics are sharp… life is good. i want to really drive these new good feelings in so tonight i’m breaking out the ih. i’ve been having too much fun with the 200’s lately; time to go back to the roots and what got me here in the first place. i’m thinking ih, a314, maybe some 203, and my arms wrapped around my babe. update will follow in the morning, hopefully this cough gets worked out and i can snuggle in peace. as always, thanks for reading. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 28, 2009, 9:23pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/138 "2009-04-28T21:23:45Z")
as much as one thing can go from bad to good really quick, so too can it go from good to bad. **trying to control something that is out of your control** here [pheromones make my life better: a case study](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromones-make-my-life-better-a-case-study/28389) i mention a situation where sarah and i are just hanging out when a guy asks us if we’re going to stay together after graduation. at the time we shrugged it off but that definitely got the fuse going. the first sign was that sarah was very happy with me the rest of that day and got happier in the following days. why? _she knew our time together was getting short_. it makes perfect sense too. we had just gotten over a big fight, we’re closer than ever, and we want to hang on to and take advantage of every moment we’re together. the second sign came last night. we hung out for a bit and then she went home early to rest for a big day today. right before bed she messages me to say that she’ll be sad when we graduate. _“shit,” i think to myself, “just play it cool and see where it goes.”_ i ask her why, and she replies that she no longer will be able to come see me whenever she pleases. then her feelings kick into overdrive. she continues on about how she has been thinking about our future for a while now, i say that the guy asking us didn’t help, she agrees and then we start to tumble down the slippery slope. at first she was slightly optimistic and mentioned doing a long distance thing. i’ve done it once before and even though it wasn’t really all that long distance, i still didn’t like it and it could’ve ended better. she’s done it once before too and while hers was a more serious long term long distance thing, it also did not end well. i told her this and said i was cautious of doing another long distance one, especially since she’s a great person and if things end between us, i want them to end on a “good” note. she paused for a bit to reflect on this and then her overdrive feelings kicked in. she says that if we’re not going to be together much longer, she doesn’t want to commit more to what we have now. i say i understand. she goes on to say that she’ll probably cry herself to sleep tonight and if her pillow is soaked in the morning, she’s coming after me. i tell her to call me if she starts crying so i can come over to _kiss her tears away_ and bring some of her favorite alcohol (as a joke). she pauses again, then says that me saying i would kiss her just doesn’t feel the same as if i would’ve said it 30 minutes before, or the day before, etc. whoa. that was fast. we hadn’t even decided anything yet and already the thought and mention of me kissing her has taken a new meaning and feeling. i think she just had to gush her overdrive feelings out. she apologized later for bringing all this up right before bed, i say it’s ok, and she goes to bed. this morning i get a text saying we should probably talk soon so that she can stop worrying about all this, and i agree to talk tonight. i got a few more texts from her and it seems like she’s in a better mood today, but i can’t read her for sure. also, there’s no telling what tonight’s conversation will bring. we both knew this was coming eventually. unfortunately the guy asking us about it set things off at the wrong time and everything spun out of control. very quick too, just last week i was scheduled to meet some of her other friends for dinner later this week because they had heard all about me and wanted to see me in person. now, that may not happen. what gets me is her saying she wouldn’t commit more effort to the relationship if things were going to end. that itself makes sense, and i agree and understand. however, **what’s the point of hanging on?** i feel that if we’re going to go, we go now. we’re happy, things between us are going well, and we both understand each others’ viewpoints. yeah it’ll hurt and suck and break our hearts, but through all that i want to still respect her as a person and enjoy the memories we share. we could’ve ended it last week during our battle. she probably would’ve thrown my stuff out and i would’ve passed her belongings to a mutual friend to send back, and we would hate each other. i’ve had to do that once and it is no fun. “the talk” is tonight. we’ll see what it brings. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [April 29, 2009, 2:03pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/139 "2009-04-29T14:03:14Z")
**jayarea, you idiot…** i learned something valuable last night. phreak and all the others who may look to my journal for advice, i hope you’re smarter than i am but if not, you can take this away too in case you find yourself in a similar situation. i’ll keep it short and sweet. i picked her up for the talk last night. right from the start it was awkward. no hello kiss and our conversation was not genuine. slight kino and a few laughs, but nothing even close to normal. we sit down on the couch and just cuddle for a few minutes, then the impending doom is too much. i ask her what she’s feeling. **from my point of view** , i wanted to give 100% until the very last day of our relationship, whenever that may be. no half-assing it, no making excuses. but wait. **from her point of view** , she said that if i knew we were going to end sometime soon (and wanted to end on a good note), then i should have spoken up earlier. **she called me out on leading her on.** i thought long and hard about it and _although it was not my intention to lead her on, **that’s basically what i was doing.** _ i see where she’s coming from. i had this vision of a perfect breakup where we’re happy one day and then we breakup that night or something and then the next day we’re happy and single again. i should know better. things don’t work this way. after she called me out i couldn’t speak for a few minutes. the more i thought about it, the more it made sense. i tried to explain myself but that only made her cry more. i let her get it all out and then we started talking for real. we decided to stay together and give it a shot, see where things go. we’ve both done long distance before so we know what it entails, and i hope our experience will help guide us in making the right decisions at the right times (i.e. breaking up when we need to instead of ignoring it and trying to fight a losing battle). **the takeaway point** what you feel is best may not be the same as what others feel is best. this goes for everything. sometimes this is arbitrary (politics), sometimes it is manageable (raising kids), sometimes you’re just plain off the mark (my situation). where possible, keep steady communication going and maintain a pulse on the big picture, and hopefully you can avoid or do a better job in my situation. ---
**Author:** ![jayarea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/48db29/32.png) [@jayarea](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/jayarea)\ **Post date:** [May 1, 2009, 7:58pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524/140 "2009-05-01T19:58:03Z")
**that’s more like it** last night, 10 pm 2s 292 back neck 2s ammo back neck 1s 200 front neck 1.5d a314 jawline covered with 1s light blue (dolce and gabbana) gotta shotgun this report so here we go, decently in chronological order - had some people over for pregame before heading out. good status hits, everyone was very social. nothing out of the ordinary there. - the forecast called for rain so we got some buddies to drive us out. everyone in my car was even more social than before. starting to see the trend here. - at the first bar, hb9 made her way over and jokingly danced with me for a bit by my table. i think the mix really got to her because about 2 minutes after we stopped, she stormed back over and literally dragged me out onto the dance floor. grinded on me for a few songs all while leaning back and turning her head so she could smell me. _very sexual._ - way way way back in the beginning of this year (start of spring semester) i had a few reports involving a girl in my group. we’ve had a “professional” relationship so far and we’ve seen each other out a few times. last night she decided to approach me and talk as friends and not just group members. at first she walked by and said hi, then came back shortly to jokingly dance on me like hb9 (is there a trend there too?), then came back throughout the night to just hang out. _social and slightly sexual_. - met lots of new people last night and everyone was really friendly. - at the second bar i got stuck with the dick bartender. long story short, he’s always a dick. last night he was fairly friendly. don’t know if that was from me or not. - i stopped by sarah’s place (she was not feeling well and didn’t come out) and together we walked back to my place. good building of intensity on the walk home, social and sexual back at my place. i teased her a lot and really worked the 292/ammo angle and she loved every minute of it, and by the graceful work of my hand and mouth i took her on a natural high a few times. i’m sure i forgot a bunch of stuff but i’m in a hurry. just wanted to report on a fun mix. [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524.md?page=6) [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/pheromone-fried-rice/24524.md?page=8)