# search costs and the death of courtship **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [October 10, 2011, 9:12pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/search-costs-and-the-death-of-courtship/52763 "2011-10-10T21:12:15Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 5\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![PheroQuirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9e8a1a/32.png) [@PheroQuirk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/PheroQuirk)\ **Post date:** [October 10, 2011, 9:12pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/search-costs-and-the-death-of-courtship/52763/1 "2011-10-10T21:12:15Z")
[SMP searching costs and the unmourned death of courtship. | Dalrock](http://dalrock.wordpress.com/2011/10/10/smp-searching-costs-and-the-unmourned-death-of-courtship/) ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hammer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/90db22/32.png) [@The\_Hammer](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/The_Hammer)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2011, 2:38am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/search-costs-and-the-death-of-courtship/52763/2 "2011-10-11T02:38:53Z")
I love it when human biology, psychology and economics collide. ---
**Author:** ![TwistedOstrich](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/twistedostrich/32/627_2.png) [@TwistedOstrich](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/TwistedOstrich)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2011, 5:50am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/search-costs-and-the-death-of-courtship/52763/3 "2011-10-11T05:50:49Z")
> [@The\_Hammer](#): > > I love it when human biology, psychology and economics collide. My thoughts exactly, I’ve had these ideas rolling around in my head for some time… wow, I was reading in the comments section.. really resonates with many of my observations… attention horing, hmmm > [@](#): > > the woman I pursued was actually interested in me first – by learning how to recognize the subtle clues, and the not so subtle clues like extended eye contact, body language etc. This often works, however I have noticed in the last several years the rise of the attention-hors – those women who give off those signals to even an attractive man, simply for the satisfaction of having caught the attention of the attractive man, but without any intent of following through on anything. This is why even good looking guys need to learn game, because they are most susceptible to attention horing from females. Indeed females like this Bereznak bitch would even pull this crap on an alpha – just so they can say they turned him down and further feed their massive egos. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Hammer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/90db22/32.png) [@The\_Hammer](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/The_Hammer)\ **Post date:** [October 11, 2011, 10:46pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/search-costs-and-the-death-of-courtship/52763/4 "2011-10-11T22:46:00Z")
It seems like “the game” has evolved so much in the past 10 years it is incredible. Some of that is my own observational bias as I have grown older, but I think the internet and other cultural factors have really changed things. I like to refer to my generation as the “sex and the city” generation. Most every girl I know is or was at sometime connected with that show. Often times the obsession started much earlier than I would expect (below 16 years old). Watching shows like this at an early age defines the sexual culture, norms and acceptable behavior from an early age without much background history. I never watched the show, save an episode or two, but one thing that is important is the women were all at least in their 30’s. To me, it is more acceptable or expected for an “older” women to have more sexual freedom because she is more used to her body and understands her own emotional limitations/expectations. Many of the women I know (and men too, but that’s another thread) were conditioned to believe that this is the way for all women to act and I see younger girls getting into situations where they are clearly uncomfortable but feel they need to do something because that is just how things are done. I’m all for sexual freedom, and I don’t care what a person does until it becomes harmful. For some of the women who idolized the characters in that show, it became self-destructive on either a physical or emotional level. This was a bit of a digression. Please feel free to disagree, I want to read your thoughts on this. ---
**Author:** ![PheroQuirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9e8a1a/32.png) [@PheroQuirk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/PheroQuirk)\ **Post date:** [October 14, 2011, 4:36pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/search-costs-and-the-death-of-courtship/52763/5 "2011-10-14T16:36:35Z")
> [@](#): > > For some of the women who idolized the characters in that show, it became self-destructive on either a physical or emotional level. Sex and the City is written by gay men. It’s not surprising that following this kind of script tends to make women unhappy. Men and Women don’t function the same…