# Sillykitty's Salon **URL:** \ **Category:** Women's Journals\ **Created:** [June 23, 2011, 9:01pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897 "2011-06-23T21:01:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2012, 1:45pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/82 "2012-05-10T13:45:24Z")
Thank you, Bella! šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2012, 4:28pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/83 "2012-05-17T16:28:59Z")
I didnā€™t get either job, even the crappiest one, and I donā€™t know why. I have excellent education, references, interviewed well, I just donā€™t know what to do anymore. ā˜¹ ---
**Author:** ![SteveO](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/87869e/32.png) [@SteveO](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/SteveO)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2012, 5:03pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/84 "2012-05-17T17:03:07Z")
> [@Sillykitty](#): > > I didnā€™t get either job, even the crappiest one, and I donā€™t know why. I have excellent education, references, interviewed well, I just donā€™t know what to do anymore. ā˜¹ Sorry but that just means they werenā€™t the right job. Something better is in store. šŸ™‚ However quite honestly I cannot understand why you seem to continue to wear A314 especially after all the negative stuff that happened at the last job. Sure it might make you feel empowered and confident, but its how the other people feel. You told me they were intimidated by you when you wore it and felt threatened. You thought it was why they caused so much trouble for you and then your boss took their side even though it was clear what was happening. I just donā€™t see A314 doing anything good for you by causing others to feel intimidated, If I was an employer Iā€™d want everyone to like work and not feel threatened by someone, especially someone I was considering to hire. Iā€™d sans the A314, P91 and cops for interviews. Seemingly you are saying Iā€™m a confident sexual woman who likes to socialize. To me that never made sense for an interview. Even p74 Iā€™d go without. KISS - IH and Ishine. Says I am a confident trustworthy person. It accents traits valued at work, unlike everything else more valued at a club. I know the right job is in the works. Remember your pot of gold is just 13 inches away. Keep fighting šŸ™‚ ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2012, 5:18pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/85 "2012-05-17T17:18:30Z")
Thank you for your awesome comments which I cannot reply to just yet as I am unsuccessfully trying to obliterateā€¦and see? despite my unsuccessful attempts at obliteration, I still have excellent grammar and spellingā€¦so obviously I need to work a little harder with the oblivion factorā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Bella](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/bella/32/1738_2.png) [@Bella](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Bella)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2012, 4:37am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/86 "2012-05-18T04:37:47Z")
Iā€™m sorry this one slipped by you. And not to add to your misery, sweetheart, but I must say I have to agree with Steve **O**. You need to rethink wearing A314 and/or cops for this purpose. How you feel is, of course, very important but this combination just doesnā€™t seem to be working to your advantage in these situations. Hang in there, Steve **O** is right. I know itā€™s difficult right now but please donā€™t give up! You _will_ have another even _better_ opportunity! šŸ™‚ Bella ---
**Author:** ![MuskCloud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f07891/32.png) [@MuskCloud](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MuskCloud)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2012, 4:50pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/87 "2012-05-18T16:50:50Z")
> [@Sillykitty](#): > > I didnā€™t get either job, even the crappiest one, and I donā€™t know why. I have excellent education, references, interviewed well, I just donā€™t know what to do anymore. ā˜¹ SK, donā€™t despair. Iā€™ve been there so many times in the past, Iā€™ve lost count. Paper leaking out of my ears and glowing references that somehow missed the target. I wish I could say that the ā€˜bestā€™ man or woman wins, but Iā€™ve been in countless interviews, formal and informal, over the years and to put it mildly, Iā€™ve been surprised at what Iā€™ve learned. When I have time, Iā€™ll share what Iā€™ve learned with you over PM if you want. But for now, make sure that youā€™re not intimidating them. In the ā€˜crappyā€™ jobs, theyā€™re not necessarily looking for ā€˜the bestā€™. Theyā€™re looking for ā€˜good enoughā€™. If you power in and let them have it with both barrels, theyā€™ll dive under the table and think: ā€˜\*\*\*\*! Next!ā€™ They donā€™t want to see a formidable intellect and a go-getting attitude. They think that person will get up and leave after a few months and they have to go through the recruitment process again. Iā€™ve known some of them to look at it like I look at a pile of washing up that needs to be done. ā€˜Aww, crap. Do I have to?ā€™ They hate recruiting, they hate seeing some of the oddballs that turn up, they hate everything about it. Iā€™ve sat in boardrooms when the boss let off steam after interviewing. Itā€™s eye-opening, an invaluable learning experience and an opportunity to discover what theyā€™re really thinking. More often than not, itā€™s a ā€˜WTF?ā€™ moment. Forget the sanitised interview feedback, lol. While Iā€™m on the subject of feedback, if you fail the interview, make sure you ask for it, lol. Many expect you to give up and go away quietly. It works quite well if you catch them on the hop. Getting an unrehearsed response can be illuminating. Make sure that you give them what they want to see and nothing more than that. What they want and what you think they want are often completely different. Took me long enough to figure that out. Musk ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 7:37am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/88 "2012-05-25T07:37:27Z")
Thank you all for your great advice, it totally makes sense. Though I did call and found out they happened to get people with more experience than me, and that they needed to totally reword that letter. My mother took her own life at the age of 40, i have never shared this with anyone. I found these under her bed at grammaā€™s house after she died and i was just checking if I forgot anything when I was leaving. Here is one poemā€¦ "I waitā€¦ I listenā€¦every nerve awareā€¦ I hold my breath and wish that someone would pound at meā€¦shake me until I am weakā€¦I have only a craving to to fling my arms and laugh and cryā€¦I ache to call out, to break the stifling dam that holds me, and dares me to to move, to touch, to feelā€¦ I shudder at the sound of a voiceā€¦and yetā€¦I respondā€¦but is it I? It is only the test of beingā€¦" ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 7:47am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/89 "2012-05-25T07:47:59Z")
Here is another of my momā€™s poems that I found under the bed: "Helloā€¦out there! ā€¦You are the Black Dot that makes ā€¦my mouth grow smallā€¦ That sits on my nose ā€¦and dares me to live againā€¦ One day, perhaps, I willā€¦ ā€¦knowā€¦ ā€¦That ā€œlove is not allā€ā€¦ And you will onlyā€¦ ā€¦sit back To conspire with my soul ā€¦To sayā€¦ ā€¦at lastā€¦ ā€¦she is the fool." I hope these are not offensive to anyone, to me, they are brutally honest, beautiful, painful and well written. ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 8:11am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/90 "2012-05-25T08:11:56Z")
Another: "And because it has comeā€¦ ā€¦and as it ever wasā€¦ Too brieflyā€¦ ā€¦I saw againā€¦ Alone and hauntedā€¦ So suddenly it came ā€¦with tears ā€¦And all the painā€¦the same.. ā€¦the all sad beautyā€¦ A one thing Yes It was thereā€¦hereā€¦ A cruel lightā€¦oneā€¦ ā€¦clear momentā€¦ And thenā€¦ ā€¦so suddenly ā€¦Beyond everythingā€¦awayā€¦ Knowingā€¦ ā€¦The all, but for this, isā€¦ ā€¦nothing, ā€¦but shimmering ashes ā€¦trying not to dieā€¦ A slave to being To the Blackness of my love" ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 8:23am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/91 "2012-05-25T08:23:32Z")
Okay, what the hellā€¦they only get better and better, and it would be selfish not to shareā€¦ "And youā€¦if only now I never ā€¦knew youā€¦ The desert hot sand that sticksā€¦ ā€¦to my wet handsā€¦ Open and blindā€¦waiting for every grain to dryā€¦ ā€¦and fall awayā€¦ Until I may slip them around ā€¦each daffodil And know it is mineā€¦ ā€¦again." ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 8:37am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/92 "2012-05-25T08:37:10Z")
She had a great talent for poetry, there is more, which is even more beautiful, yet also more poignant. It feels right to finally share this, but at the same time, I would never wish to cause pain to any reader. ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 8:56am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/93 "2012-05-25T08:56:30Z")
Maybe this sounds terrible, but I kind of can identify with her feelings/words/expressions. I just couldnā€™t express then as eloquently as she did. I think Iā€™m better at technical writing (ie, reports, etc). ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 9:02am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/94 "2012-05-25T09:02:55Z")
What the hellā€¦ "I walk along a crooked path Where I do not know I feel the sun burn on my back And then it blinds my eye I twist and turn and amble on But still beneath the sky While sky and stars watch where I go Iā€™ll keep this tired pace I cannot see the path for long Its turns are sharp and fast But if I stop Iā€™ll never know My will to stay must last" ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 9:13am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/95 "2012-05-25T09:13:11Z")
More poetry written by my mom that I think she never meant anyone to see. But sheā€™s dead now, and I think itā€™s too beautiful to not share. Sorry mom, I think you understand. "Recall your sinful actions And spite your aching heart Look back, and cry aloudā€¦ You played the evil part! Your eyes will swell from weeping Your soul will cringe and die When you recall the sins The heart cannot deny" I wish i could ask her all about these these things, but by the time I found them, it was too late. Someone really, really hurt her badly. My dad? Very likely. Others? i guess Iā€™ll never knowā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 9:21am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/96 "2012-05-25T09:21:54Z")
Since i canā€™t sleep and itā€™s 6:17 amā€¦ Another mom poem: "She livedā€¦ ā€¦To be loved and admired She livedā€¦ ā€¦For a chance at fame She livedā€¦ ā€¦For all to desire She livedā€¦ ā€¦To achieve a name She livedā€¦ ā€¦And for beautyā€™s sake She livedā€¦ ā€¦The world to enthrall She livedā€¦ ā€¦But she was alone She livedā€¦ ā€¦And was nothing at all" ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 9:41am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/97 "2012-05-25T09:41:28Z")
Hereā€™s a good one: "What is it ā€¦to be nothing A nobody that is.. ā€¦to speak of nothing Is ā€¦of a void A nowhere ā€¦Where time has ceasedā€¦ ā€¦to toll the hoursā€¦ Hours of daysā€¦ Days of eternityā€¦ Where flesh isā€¦ ā€¦warm and vital And mortals loveā€¦ Each momentā€¦ ā€¦is forever. Curious souls.. ā€¦that litā€¦ (Iā€™m not sure if this next part is a continuation of the previous poem, or if itā€™s a new one) "The moments pass And forget they have ā€¦Been.. Never see a new world But cry ā€¦wasted tears of ā€¦lost seasons And know only ā€¦To crouch ā€¦in the fog And chant a hymn ā€¦in praise ā€¦of no-one" ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 9:57am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/98 "2012-05-25T09:57:55Z")
There are more, but I think my favorite one is the ā€œBlack Dot that makes my mouth grow smallā€ one. ---
**Author:** ![Sillykitty](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sillykitty/32/1574_2.png) [@Sillykitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Sillykitty)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 10:08am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/99 "2012-05-25T10:08:33Z")
I hope I havenā€™t offended anyone with this sharing, if so, then, oops, maybe you shouldā€™ve had a V8, lol. ---
**Author:** ![SteveO](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/87869e/32.png) [@SteveO](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/SteveO)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2012, 2:08pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/100 "2012-05-25T14:08:01Z")
If you did, then they need some more. ---
**Author:** ![SteveO](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/87869e/32.png) [@SteveO](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/SteveO)\ **Post date:** [July 17, 2012, 4:04pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897/101 "2012-07-17T16:04:57Z")
> [@Sad News - SillyKitty](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sad-news-sillykitty/56171): > > It is with a deep sense of loss I have the obligation to alert you, my friends, of the passing of our dear and beloved friend. A forum member sent me a PM asking if I heard the news about SillyKitty. I automatically assumed that her long quest to find meaningful employment had finally ended and called to congratulate her. At that time I learned that SillyKitty had passed away. Please keep her and her family in your prayers and thoughts. SillyKitty has passed away ā˜¹ [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897.md?page=4) [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/sillykittys-salon/50897.md?page=6)