# So who would like to help me with Guy Advice? **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [February 16, 2007, 9:03pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075 "2007-02-16T21:03:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Rbt](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/rbt/32/2066_2.png) [@Rbt](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Rbt)\ **Post date:** [February 17, 2007, 7:18pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/21 "2007-02-17T19:18:19Z")
There is risk involved, but all of life involves risk. It’s something you have to figure out: how much risk am I willing to take? If it goes south, how bad will it really be? What’s the worst that can happen? And just how bad is “worst?” Maybe it was meant to be. Maybe it wasn’t. (I’m in one of those debates with myself right now as a matter of fact.) The things that count are rarely easy. ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2007, 6:38pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/22 "2007-02-18T18:38:16Z")
> [@Rbt](#): > > Maybe it was meant to be. Maybe it wasn’t. (I’m in one of those debates with myself right now as a matter of fact.) you know this is pretty much the credo i live by as far as love and romance are concerned. But I wonder sometimes if this doesn’t make me too passive. I mean i’ve spent a lot of time doing other stuff, expecting that Mr. Right will just eventually fall in my lap, when the Universe deems me ready. Now i don’t regret all the other stuff i’ve done, and find my life to be quite relaxed and mellow since there’s no man dramam in it - but I’m dealing with Mr. Right Now, since Mr. Right hasn’t come along. And to be honest - i’m starting to feel the biological clock ticking. I don’t feel pressed to settle down, and still get panicky at the idea of a commitment, but i also realize i’m not meeting many men worth committing to, and that time is passing by faster and faster. it’s not the marriage i want so much as the kids, but imo, kids should have both a mom and a dad worth a damn so i’m not really willing to step outside of the traditional way of making babies. (this is totally a tangent, btw) ---
**Author:** ![Rbt](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/rbt/32/2066_2.png) [@Rbt](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Rbt)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2007, 4:46am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/23 "2007-02-19T04:46:50Z")
Well I know you can’t sit by and hope something magical happens by itself. (Don’t we wish…) We _do_ have to work to make our own “good luck.” We do have to put in some effort, keep trying, pursuing (in a paced way), moving foward, etc. Fortune helps those who help themselves. But I can also understand the phrase “grant me patience, but hurry up!” I too feel I’ve been waiting all too long for some more “right” people in my life. I keep looking. Found some prospects today as a matter of fact. Time will tell. I know being _too_ passive will get me nowhere. Being “out of the loop” due to medical problems (now just about fixed) for almost 10 years doesn’t help either… As I never wanted kids, and well, at an age of over 50, that may be a difficult thing to do even if I did, and as a male, I don’t have the same biological clock issues. Can empathize however. ---
**Author:** ![Mak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@Mak](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Mak)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2007, 8:14am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/24 "2007-02-19T08:14:14Z")
Rbt has a point. There is no “Magic”, except the one that we try to see, and allow to happen. I haven’t seen Mr or Ms Right happen, without a little help here and there. I’ve seen when people ‘thought’ they had that, but because they did little or no effort to make it last, it just didn’t last. So without knowing the situation, he may not be Mr Right, but maybe he is not that far off, and there is something you can do to figure him out. ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2007, 3:06pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/25 "2007-02-19T15:06:45Z")
No he’s not far off - He’s decent starting material. so let’s say he’s not Mr. Right, Now. _lol_ ---
**Author:** ![Mak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@Mak](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Mak)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 12:20pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/26 "2007-02-20T12:20:24Z")
Mr. Not Right now ? ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 12:31pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/27 "2007-02-20T12:31:17Z")
Mr. Maybe Some Day _lol_ ---
**Author:** ![Mak](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@Mak](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Mak)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 12:34pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/28 "2007-02-20T12:34:31Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > Mr. Maybe Some Day > > _lol_ Got it. Mr. Not Right Now is reserved for hubbies or long term boyfriends. ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 12:35pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/29 "2007-02-20T12:35:48Z")
haha! aka “Mr. I have a Headache” ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 7:56pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/30 "2007-02-20T19:56:03Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > yeah i’ve known this guy for years now - he’s flipped on me a couple of times before we got together, but he always came back around. > > now i’m not sure how to handle him. like perhaps i’m too aloof, but at the same time - i don’t want to get too serious, because that would be trouble. i guess i’ll just see how the next couple of weeks play out. all things reveal themselves in time, no? Did you consider that maybe he is acting this way and saying these things to see how you react? Maybe he is trying to figure out if the “casual” talk is just talk…he may be trying to find out if you are looking for something on a deeper level… ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 8:17pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/31 "2007-02-20T20:17:51Z")
hmm…that’s a possibility i guess. I would think my actions would have made it fairly obvious that it’s strictly casual. I mean i’m not really requiring anything of him as i would of someone i expect to have a commitment with. and he did used to be a cop, and sometimes i feel like when he asks me stuff, he’s using that sideways cop style of questioning, where they ask everything around what they really want to know, to get info. i dunno. i definitely prefer direct questions and answers. ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 8:34pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/32 "2007-02-20T20:34:23Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > hmm…that’s a possibility i guess. I would think my actions would have made it fairly obvious that it’s strictly casual. I mean i’m not really requiring anything of him as i would of someone i expect to have a commitment with. > > and he did used to be a cop, and sometimes i feel like when he asks me stuff, he’s using that sideways cop style of questioning, where they ask everything around what they really want to know, to get info. > > i dunno. i definitely prefer direct questions and answers. Yeah, I prefer the direct approach myself. I find though, that many men think that even though a woman is acting a certain way and saying certain things… in the back of her mind, she has a “hidden agenda”…and since he is an ex-cop, he may be even more suspicious… ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 8:47pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/33 "2007-02-20T20:47:44Z")
_lol_ well he’ll have to get over that. I’m one of the more straightforward people he’ll know in his life. and trust is a 2-way street. he needs to trust me as much as he may want me to trust him. we’re gonna ahve to have that conversation, when next we talk i think. i hope he does ask me about my personal business again, because that would make a good segue into general topics of trust issues, and boundaries, and how far we’re each willing to go. ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 9:16pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/34 "2007-02-20T21:16:30Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > i hope he does ask me about my personal business again, because that would make a good segue into general topics of trust issues, and boundaries, and how far we’re each willing to go. EXACTLY 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 9:27pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/35 "2007-02-20T21:27:27Z")
hah! i was going to give you rep points, but apparently i need to share the love so the board won’t let me - so thanks! i don’t know how you jsut did that, but you certainly managed to get me pointed in the right direction. ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 9:41pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/36 "2007-02-20T21:41:38Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > hah! i was going to give you rep points, but apparently i need to share the love so the board won’t let me - so thanks! i don’t know how you jsut did that, but you certainly managed to get me pointed in the right direction. Glad I could help!! Yeah, there have been lots of times that I want to give some more rep points to people I have given them to before…like my girls Lor and Ail, but the point system won’t let me…but, they KNOW I love them…😉 ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 10:08pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/37 "2007-02-20T22:08:23Z")
you know i was gonna put this in the vagina thread, but then realized this one is closer to the topic. it’s actually about tailoring, and your experiences with the 2 very different guys. when i wear alpha androstenol cleo around this guy - is when the possessive stuff comes to the surface - but his passion for me seems to ratchet down a notch. when i’m “naked” - no pheros at all - he’s all passion, not so much with the possessiveness - but there’s also “no talking more kissing” what’s your read on that? and how do you think i should modulate the passion vs openness issue? I haven’t had a chance to test him with [Instant Honesty](https://a314.com/product/instant-honesty/). ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 10:32pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/38 "2007-02-20T22:32:46Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > you know i was gonna put this in the vagina thread, but then realized this one is closer to the topic. > > it’s actually about tailoring, and your experiences with the 2 very different guys. > > when i wear alpha androstenol cleo around this guy - is when the possessive stuff comes to the surface - but his passion for me seems to ratchet down a notch. when i’m “naked” - no pheros at all - he’s all passion, not so much with the possessiveness - but there’s also “no talking more kissing” > > what’s your read on that? and how do you think i should modulate the passion vs openness issue? I haven’t had a chance to test him with Instant Honesty. Well, I only tried Cleo once…a friend of mine let me try hers, but I never got any reaction from it. I believe Ail uses Cleo, so maybe she could speak more to your questions about that particular product… As far as [Instant Honesty](https://a314.com/product/instant-honesty/) is concerned, you will probably get more deep conversation…it has a lot of Beta Androstenol in it…try it…he may react differently to it… I can only guess that it must be the Alpha Androstenol or some other ingredient in the Cleo (they say it has “secret” ingredients)…maybe it has something that is affecting him and causing the possessiveness…I think I would try Instant Honesty, without the Cleo, and see what happens…maybe you could throw in a little of my favorite, Essence of Woman…😃 Or, maybe Instant Honesty in your hair, along with Instant Sexiness with Xcops…that way, you should be able to get the openness AND the passion… ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2007, 11:22pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/39 "2007-02-20T23:22:09Z")
well at this point, other than the Cleo I’ve got [Instant Honesty](https://a314.com/product/instant-honesty/), Instant Shine, A314, PCC and some edge gel and perception stuff, which i have no idea what to do with. So how about Instant Honesty in my hair, with some Edge gel on the chest and some PCC rolled here and there? incidentally cleo seems to work well with darn near everyone else, making them want to stay and chat with me as much as possible - it’s not overtly sexual, but very congenially flirty. The guys seem to turn into perpetual 8 year olds asking if they can marry me when they grow up. It’s that sort of vibe. ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2007, 1:17am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075/40 "2007-02-21T01:17:38Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > well at this point, other than the Cleo I’ve got Instant Honesty, Instant Shine, A314, PCC and some edge gel and perception stuff, which i have no idea what to do with. > > So how about Instant Honesty in my hair, with some Edge gel on the chest and some PCC rolled here and there? > > incidentally cleo seems to work well with darn near everyone else, making them want to stay and chat with me as much as possible - it’s not overtly sexual, but very congenially flirty. The guys seem to turn into perpetual 8 year olds asking if they can marry me when they grow up. It’s that sort of vibe. Well, the Perception gels do NOTHING for me…and I do mean NOTHING. Try a couple sprays of [Instant Honesty](https://a314.com/product/instant-honesty/) in your hair, and a whole LOT of PCC. PCC is ok, but never was strong enough for me…I had to break out the big gun of cops…Essence of Woman. EW will make things VERY OVERTLY sexual…trust me…it is the total and complete BOMB!! 😃 Now, if you want a sexual encounter to get raw and animalistic, use a few dabs of Edge…I put a little in my cleavage and a dab on my belly…takes things to a different level…😮 [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075.md?page=1) [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/so-who-would-like-to-help-me-with-guy-advice/2075.md?page=3)