# Social Intelligence - the book **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [January 28, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/social-intelligence-the-book/1803 "2007-01-28T18:04:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![PheroQuirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9e8a1a/32.png) [@PheroQuirk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/PheroQuirk)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/social-intelligence-the-book/1803/1 "2007-01-28T18:04:21Z")
by Goleman [Amazon.com: Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships: Books: Daniel Goleman](http://www.amazon.com/Social-Intelligence-Science-Human-Relationships/dp/0553803522/) On order, but first chapter looks good. Here is extract from SciAm review - “We are wired to connect,” Goleman says. “Neuroscience has discovered that our brain’s very design makes it sociable, inexorably drawn into an intimate brain-to-brain linkup whenever we engage with another person. That neural bridge lets us affect the brain—and so the body—of everyone we interact with, just as they do us.” Each encounter between people primes the emotions. This neurological pas de deux stimulates our nervous systems, affecting hormones, heart rate, circulation, breathing and the immune system. Goleman peppers his discourse with anecdotes to illustrate the power of social intelligence. From the countertop of Rosie Garcia, a multitasking baker in New York’s Grand Central Terminal, to the tantrum-tainted class of a Texas teacher, he shows how social sensitivity and wisdom can profoundly reshape conflicts. In one encounter in Iraq, a quick-witted U.S. commander turned a Muslim mob’s threats into laughter when he ordered his soldiers to kneel, lower rifl es and smile—averting a potentially fatal clash. Goleman deftly discusses relevant neural pathways, including the thalamus and amygdala, which together regulate sensory and arousal stimuli. He speaks of spindle cells, which rapidly process social decisions; of mirror neurons, which sense another’s movements; of dopamine neurons, which react to pleasure-inducing neurotransmitters that flow freely while two lovers gaze. The author’s introductory tour through this emerging research landscape helps readers grasp core concepts of social neuroscience, illustrating abstractions with poignant anecdotes, without excessive jargon. Goleman also explains how such research may influence our lives. Given our socially reactive brains, we must “be wise,” he says, and be aware of the ways that our moods influence the biology of each life we touch. ---
**Author:** ![Carrie](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/carrie/32/1537_2.png) [@Carrie](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Carrie)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 6:23pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/social-intelligence-the-book/1803/2 "2007-01-28T18:23:41Z")
That sounds worth looking into, Quirk, thanks for bringing it up. I’m intrigued by the kneeling soldiers defusing a volatile situation; would love to know more about that commander and his thought process. ---
**Author:** ![PheroQuirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9e8a1a/32.png) [@PheroQuirk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/PheroQuirk)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/social-intelligence-the-book/1803/3 "2007-01-28T18:29:48Z")
> [@Carrie](#): > > That sounds worth looking into, Quirk, thanks for bringing it up. I’m intrigued by the kneeling soldiers defusing a volatile situation; would love to know more about that commander and his thought process. Excerpt (sadly not covering that episode) is here… [eBooks.com - Social Intelligence eBook](http://www.ebooks.com/ebooks/book_display.asp?IID=257823) > [@](#): > > When it is driven by alarm, the amygdala’s extensive circuitry commandeers key points throughout the brain, shepherding our thoughts, attention, and perception toward whatever has made us afraid. We instinctively become more attentive to the faces of the people around us, searching for smiles or frowns that give us a better sense of how to interpret signs of danger or that might signal someone’s intentions. > > This increased amygdala-driven vigilance heightens our alertness to emotional cues in other people. That intensified focus in turn more powerfully evokes their feelings in us, lubricating contagion. And so our moments of apprehension increase our susceptibility to another person’s emotions. This is a long shot, but I wonder if the process described above is at work when wearing large doses of 'none and hit-spotting. Is it possible that when one is initially in a bad mood none increases emotional arousal and leads to a downward spiral in state? ---
**Author:** ![Lor](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lor/32/759_2.png) [@Lor](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lor)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 7:09pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/social-intelligence-the-book/1803/4 "2007-01-28T19:09:35Z")
wow. interesting stuff about the 'none. high amounts give me flight or fight anxiety,but not necessarily bad/good. > [@](#): > > That intensified focus in turn more powerfully evokes their feelings in us, lubricating contagion. And so our moments of apprehension increase our susceptibility to another person’s emotions. do you think this applies to good/sexy/or comforting feelings, and do you think there is an outside factor that decides whos emotional cues over rides and dominates anothers? > [@](#): > > He speaks of spindle cells, which rapidly process _social decisions_; of mirror neurons, which sense another’s movements; of dopamine neurons, which react to pleasure-inducing neurotransmitters that flow freely while two lovers gaze. ---
**Author:** ![Carrie](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/carrie/32/1537_2.png) [@Carrie](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Carrie)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2007, 7:29pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/social-intelligence-the-book/1803/5 "2007-01-28T19:29:24Z")
The excerpt was great, too. It’s going on the list! ---
**Author:** ![PheroQuirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9e8a1a/32.png) [@PheroQuirk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/PheroQuirk)\ **Post date:** [February 13, 2007, 12:46am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/social-intelligence-the-book/1803/6 "2007-02-13T00:46:34Z")
> [@Lor](#): > > do you think this applies to good/sexy/or comforting feelings, and do you think there is an outside factor that decides whos emotional cues over rides and dominates anothers? Yes - I think this applies to good feelings as well as bad. I think that the person with the highest ‘state’ is the one who drives social resonance within a group. > [@TD Blueprint](#): > > When you’re in state, the world is your oyster. Your mind quiets, and everything you do just works. Your humour hits, your stories rock, and people follow your lead. The guy who is the most in state usually has the strongest “magnet” of attention --, so to speak. > > There are different ways of thinking about why state has this impact, but a cogent explanation comes down to this: State is a reflection of identity, and your identity is a reflection of social value. Therefore, whoever is the most in-state must be the person with the highest social value. > > Beyond that, as a part of human nature there is inherent value in people expressing their personality from a place of authenticity.