# Tips and Thoughts for you who worry about your looks. **URL:** \ **Category:** Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports\ **Created:** [March 5, 2007, 9:38pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368 "2007-03-05T21:38:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Matthew1982ct](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/matthew1982ct/32/1157_2.png) [@Matthew1982ct](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Matthew1982ct)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 5:40am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/61 "2007-03-09T05:40:18Z")
Sure. Approx. 3,125,000,000 women in the world. That is females. 1 second to 120(ish) years of age. So if you’re the most beautiful woman in the world; you’re 1 in 3.125 billion. They are around 60 million people in the UK; of which just over 50% are women. 19 million people in Australia; of which just over 50% are women. So the most beautful woman in the UK is 1 in say 30.75 million. Australia is 1 in 9.375 million. I am not saying the UK one is hotter than the Australian; just that if all we know about them is that they’re the hottest in a given country, those are the numbers. So even the hottest women in the world (all we know about her is she’s 1/3.125 billion); would theoretically be equalled (or surpassed) every 3.125 billion female birth’s or so. Matt ---
**Author:** ![Matthew1982ct](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/matthew1982ct/32/1157_2.png) [@Matthew1982ct](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Matthew1982ct)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 5:52am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/62 "2007-03-09T05:52:35Z")
O yes and to work out the score out of 10; you go: 1 - (rating/population group). Then multiply the answer by 10. 1 - 1/450 = 0.997777777. 0.9977777777 multiplied by 10 = 9.97777777 or for simplicity 9.98. I used 450 as that’s how many girls are in a crowded club. So the hottest girl in the club, on a busy night, would be a 9.98 (in theory, on average, adjustments to be made of course for demographics). Matt ---
**Author:** ![Matthew1982ct](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/matthew1982ct/32/1157_2.png) [@Matthew1982ct](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Matthew1982ct)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 6:09am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/63 "2007-03-09T06:09:25Z")
And also means; negating to take the demographic into account, that there are 6,944,444 (close on 7 million) females that are better looking in the world, than the “hottest girl in the (busy) club”. A point that gives me endless cause for optimism. 😃 Jokes. Matt ---
**Author:** ![Gem](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Gem](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Gem)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 10:28am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/64 "2007-03-09T10:28:56Z")
> [@smoothplayer](#): > > so that pic in the avatar isn’t you? i’m not gay or nothing but you look good for a guy. i’m surprised anyone gave you less than a 4. Thank you buddy, It is me - but it is a lucky shot. I have a very bad relationship with food and my weight fluctuates wildly. That picture was taken while I was at a slim phase but my success with women rarely changes whether I am 12 stone or 20. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Attraction is not a choice. Upon meeting a person the human brain immediately assess’ a person’s value based on several factors (of which physcial appearance is about 20%), You the _Emotionally Percieve_ the results of this calculation. ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 12:07pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/65 "2007-03-09T12:07:57Z")
> [@Matthew1982ct](#): > > Sure. > > Approx. 3,125,000,000 women in the world. That is females. 1 second to 120(ish) years of age. > > So if you’re the most beautiful woman in the world; you’re 1 in 3.125 billion. They are around 60 million people in the UK; of which just over 50% are women. 19 million people in Australia; of which just over 50% are women. > > So the most beautful woman in the UK is 1 in say 30.75 million. Australia is 1 in 9.375 million. I am not saying the UK one is hotter than the Australian; just that if all we know about them is that they’re the hottest in a given country, those are the numbers. So even the hottest women in the world (all we know about her is she’s 1/3.125 billion); would theoretically be equalled (or surpassed) every 3.125 billion female birth’s or so. > > Matt > [@Matthew1982ct](#): > > O yes and to work out the score out of 10; you go: > > 1 - (rating/population group). Then multiply the answer by 10. > > 1 - 1/450 = 0.997777777. 0.9977777777 multiplied by 10 = 9.97777777 or for simplicity 9.98. > > I used 450 as that’s how many girls are in a crowded club. So the hottest girl in the club, on a busy night, would be a 9.98 (in theory, on average, adjustments to be made of course for demographics). > > Matt > [@Matthew1982ct](#): > > And also means; negating to take the demographic into account, that there are 6,944,444 (close on 7 million) females that are better looking in the world, than the “hottest girl in the (busy) club”. A point that gives me endless cause for optimism. 😃 Jokes. > > Matt damn you and your logic. you know i’m not capable of that. I’m a woman! but if i look at your data - i have to agree…there is no such thing as a perfect 10. And really good looking people are most likely a dime a dozen. So i’m not sure why all the fuss. ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 1:43pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/66 "2007-03-09T13:43:38Z")
> [@CuriousPUA](#): > > This is what works. > > I will tell a girl something like “hey, lets get back to my place, I have some cool pictures to show you”, and she’ll say “nooo…” and then after a few minutes of conversation meant to arouse her and to change her EMOTIONS I will ask again, she’ll maybe say no. What I do then is again, trying to change her emotions so that they will override, causing her logical brain to lose control and thus lead to her accepting my offer. > > Haven’t you girls gone out one night and then ended up doing something so stupid that your logical thinking the next day went “what was I thinking!?”. Well, that was your emotions overtaking your logic… scary huh ? > > I’ve seen guys approach the most devoted of women to their husbands and play so well with her emotions that she’ll actually cheat on her husband, terrible thing. This happens countless times, I know you guys have heard of it many times yourself. > > This is why your understanding of what attracts you is distorted. > > I love women psychology adn I’m just sharing wisdom here so keep the hatin’ to yourselves, aight ? > [@Ail](#): > > So no..we don’t ALL do things after one night out clubbing that we regret, and while many of you may think I’m an oddity… > > So..take from that what you will. I have been a clubber since my late teens, and still am twice a week, and never have any urges to go with anyone else. > > I am possibly one of the most WYSIWYG women you are ever likely to encounter, and I am NOT impressed by any PUA moves. > > Read the numerous threads on this. I lost 56 rep points over three days for speaking up on behalf of many of the women here about this fact, but I didn’t care then, and I do not now either. > > START reading what the WOMEN here say they do and don’t appreciate in a man, STOP thinking with your dicks, and REALISE you should become grounded. > > THAT, is how you will succeed with women. > > Ail )O( Hey Ail…tried to give you some points for this, but the system said I need to “spead the love”… You and I are very much on the same page, I think…since you are being so REAL with everybody, I will too… I too was physically abused in TWO of my three marriages, and I also NEVER cheated…I will never cheat in a committed relationship… And, “Curious”, just for the record, no man has EVER picked me up in a bar (or elsewhere)…even though they have tried…none have succeeded 😃. I find PUA moves totally stupid…and yes, I have seen them ALL…from blatant attempts at picking someone up, to the more subtle “moves”…the truth IS…if I want to be with someone, I will, but there has to be more to the man than simply his good looks, smooth “moves”, money, or position in life… The women that you are able to “sway” with your tactics apparently do not have to moral fiber to stand up for themselves or what they want and need in a relationship…so, I’m sorry, but I am one of those women who makes it a rule, NEVER to lose control to do something that I will regret the next morning… ---
**Author:** ![Lor](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lor/32/759_2.png) [@Lor](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lor)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 3:21pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/67 "2007-03-09T15:21:02Z")
at the risk of alienating myself further, im just going to state that there are _sooooo_ many women that **love** to be picked up, feel special,get it on ,and never see you again. no big deal. i think the issue is when manipulation and deceit is necessary to get someone, which (maybe only in my eyes) really is another manifestation of bullying. some bullying is physical,some mental. now i am _wayyy_ impressed with a casanova that can woo me, turn me on, make me feel special, and- heres the kicker- when i KNOW he is a player… when i know he likes variety and its just about fun in the moment… and i _still_ think “hey, i wouldnt mind hanging out with HIM again” THAT is a real and probably natural PUA. i have trouble with the wanting women that are easily led… there is a _creep factor_ in dishonest PU. and your right,alot of women dont listen to their intuition when “creepy,skin crawling ewww” comes to mind. that feeling pops up when you recognize a lie physically but your mind ,because of conversation, tells you “nahhh he’s a nice guy”. isnt it cooler to be a PUA and leave that “i still want you” cloud behind you, rather than a “i cant believe i did that guy” cloud? even if you never see them again, the choice is positivity or negativity, and NOT to her but to yourself.self respect. ---
**Author:** ![SteveO](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/87869e/32.png) [@SteveO](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/SteveO)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 3:26pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/68 "2007-03-09T15:26:36Z")
> [@Lor](#): > > at the risk of alienating myself further, > > im just going to state that there are _sooooo_ many women that **love** to be picked up, feel special,get it on ,and never see you again. > > no big deal. > > i think the issue is when manipulation and deceit is necessary to get someone, which (maybe only in my eyes) really is another manifestation of bullying. > > some bullying is physical,some mental. > > now i am _wayyy_ impressed with a casanova that can woo me, turn me on, make me feel special, and- heres the kicker- > > when i KNOW he is a player… > when i know he likes variety and its just about fun in the moment… > and i _still_ think “hey, i wouldnt mind hanging out with HIM again” > > THAT is a real and probably natural PUA. > > i have trouble with the wanting women that are easily led… > there is a _creep factor_ in dishonest PU. and your right,alot of women dont listen to their intuition when “creepy,skin crawling ewww” comes to mind. that feeling pops up when you recognize a lie physically but your mind ,because of conversation, tells you “nahhh he’s a nice guy”. > > isnt it cooler to be a PUA and leave that “i still want you” cloud behind you, rather than a “i cant believe i did that guy” cloud? > > even if you never see them again, the choice is positivity or negativity, and NOT to her but to yourself.self respect. Exactly Lor. I’d give you rep points “again” but I still need to spread some of my love around. Good thing it’s Friday 😃 . A bully is undesirable and gets left behind. What I needed to teach myself was not so much to change myself as a person, but to change my approach and use my happy-go-lucky persona to allow myself the opportunity to slip past the female shield. Very well put. We love us some Lor over here. ---
**Author:** ![Lor](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lor/32/759_2.png) [@Lor](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lor)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 3:33pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/69 "2007-03-09T15:33:42Z")
right on, steveo nothing inherently wrong in wanting to play and have a good time, but when you can do it and _maintain your integrity_ you are sexxayist sexxay man alive . [http://www.smilieshq.com/smilies/tongue0018.gif](http://www.smilieshq.com/smilies/tongue0018.gif) ---
**Author:** ![dolly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/dolly/32/1591_2.png) [@dolly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/dolly)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 3:41pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/70 "2007-03-09T15:41:38Z")
> [@Lor](#): > > i think the issue is when manipulation and deceit is necessary to get someone, which (maybe only in my eyes) really is another manifestation of bullying. > > some bullying is physical,some mental. > > i have trouble with the wanting women that are easily led… > there is a _creep factor_ in dishonest PU. and your right,alot of women dont listen to their intuition when “creepy,skin crawling ewww” comes to mind. that feeling pops up when you recognize a lie physically but your mind ,because of conversation, tells you “nahhh he’s a nice guy”. > > even if you never see them again, the choice is positivity or negativity, and NOT to her but to yourself.self respect. > [@Lor](#): > > nothing inherently wrong in wanting to play and have a good time, > but when you can do it and _maintain your integrity_ you are sexxayist sexxay man alive . > > [http://www.smilieshq.com/smilies/tongue0018.gif](http://www.smilieshq.com/smilies/tongue0018.gif) Couldn’t have said it better myself, Lor…😉 ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 6:08pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/71 "2007-03-09T18:08:55Z")
> [@Lor](#): > > now i am _wayyy_ impressed with a casanova that can woo me, turn me on, make me feel special, and- heres the kicker- > > when i KNOW he is a player… > when i know he likes variety and its just about fun in the moment… > and i _still_ think “hey, i wouldnt mind hanging out with HIM again” > > THAT is a real and probably natural PUA. word. my kinda people. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![nbully79](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c68b51/32.png) [@nbully79](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/nbully79)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 7:31pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/72 "2007-03-09T19:31:15Z")
> [@Lor](#): > > at the risk of alienating myself further, > > im just going to state that there are _sooooo_ many women thatlove to be picked up, feel special,get it on ,and never see you again. > > no big deal. > > i think the issue is when manipulation and deceit is necessary to get someone, which (maybe only in my eyes) really is another manifestation of **bully** ing. > > some **bully** ing is physical,some mental. > > now i am _wayyy_ impressed with a casanova that can woo me, turn me on, make me feel special, and- heres the kicker- > > when i KNOW he is a player… > when i know he likes variety and its just about fun in the moment… > and i _still_ think “hey, i wouldnt mind hanging out with HIM again” > > THAT is a real and probably natural PUA. > > i have trouble with the wanting women that are easily led… > there is a _creep factor_ in dishonest PU. and your right,alot of women dont listen to their intuition when “creepy,skin crawling ewww” comes to mind. that feeling pops up when you recognize a lie physically but your mind ,because of conversation, tells you “nahhh he’s a nice guy”. > > isnt it cooler to be a PUA and leave that “i still want you” cloud behind you, rather than a “i cant believe i did that guy” cloud? > > even if you never see them again, the choice is positivity or negativity, and NOT to her but to yourself.self respect. Great post! I love you, Lor!🙂 And I notice you mentioning my name a couple of times.😛 ---
**Author:** ![Godhand](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/godhand/32/2378_2.png) [@Godhand](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Godhand)\ **Post date:** [March 9, 2007, 8:27pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/73 "2007-03-09T20:27:45Z")
Here is a repost of what I said on the very same topic over at King Flex’s forum: Actually, I’d say that looks DO matter, but they are not the end-all be-all in pick-up. A guy that looks good can pull females without talking at all. A guy that looks below average has to come out his mouthpiece with verbal game. Also, I count physical appearance as a part of game. People are in control of 90% of their physical appearance. A person that looks very attractive is simply somebody that put in extra preparation. Most of pick-up is preparation. I can get vastly different results if I let myslef go, then hit the club looking bummy as opposed to staying in shape and getting booted and suited. When people say “no matter what you look like”, it is almost always a marketing scheme for their product. I stay away from PUAs and gurus that state that their system works no matter how you look. This is simply pandering to the American mindset of not wanting to put in hard work for results. Its like instead of changing their eating habits, people want a diet pill. When sombody says a system of game works regardless of other factors, they are simply telling you what you want to hear in order to sell you something. ---
**Author:** ![Lor](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lor/32/759_2.png) [@Lor](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lor)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2007, 2:03pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/74 "2007-03-10T14:03:04Z")
> [@Godhand](#): > > Here is a repost of what I said on the very same topic over at King Flex’s forum: > > Actually, I’d say that looks DO matter, but they are not the end-all be-all in pick-up. A guy that looks good can pull females without talking at all. A guy that looks below average has to come out his mouthpiece with verbal game. Also, I count physical appearance as a part of game. People are in control of 90% of their physical appearance. A person that looks very attractive is simply somebody that put in extra preparation. Most of pick-up is preparation. I can get vastly different results if I let myslef go, then hit the club looking bummy as opposed to staying in shape and getting booted and suited. When people say “no matter what you look like”, it is almost always a marketing scheme for their product. I stay away from PUAs and gurus that state that their system works no matter how you look. This is simply pandering to the American mindset of not wanting to put in hard work for results. Its like instead of changing their eating habits, people want a diet pill. When sombody says a system of game works regardless of other factors, they are simply telling you what you want to hear in order to sell you something. you might be right,but when you say “not wanting to put in the hard work” what product are you refering to? from what i understand of the game and similar methods to encourage success in PU, it hardly sounds effortless! the effect might appear effortless, but the very little i know sounds like effort to me! :o ---
**Author:** ![Lor](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lor/32/759_2.png) [@Lor](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lor)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2007, 2:05pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/75 "2007-03-10T14:05:51Z")
> [@nbully79](#): > > Great post! I love you, Lor!🙂 > And I notice you mentioning my name a couple of times.😛 i _hardly_ associate you with bullying 😛 but if i ever dont seem to mention your name in any particular post, just assume im talking about you 😃 😛 😮 ---
**Author:** ![Nunya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ac8455/32.png) [@Nunya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Nunya)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2007, 2:06pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/76 "2007-03-10T14:06:12Z")
i may be mistaken Lor - but i think he means things like…taking the magic pill instead of hitting the gym and watching what you eat. Opting for the elevator, even tho the stairs would be faster, driving around a parking lot for 15-20 minutes, just so you can have the spot closest to the door, never mind the spots that would mean a walk. we Americans do so love the soft option. ---
**Author:** ![Lor](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/lor/32/759_2.png) [@Lor](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Lor)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2007, 2:15pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/77 "2007-03-10T14:15:57Z")
> [@Nunya](#): > > i may be mistaken Lor - but i think he means things like…taking the magic pill instead of hitting the gym and watching what you eat. > > Opting for the elevator, even tho the stairs would be faster, driving around a parking lot for 15-20 minutes, just so you can have the spot closest to the door, never mind the spots that would mean a walk. > > we Americans do so love the soft option. oh i read that, and i understand and agree to the extent that it would be silly for anyone to not want to save time, but anyone that wants to improve their game,or especially those without game at all, are going to want something they havent heard before. im just not convinced anyone would pay any amount of money to learn tactics they dont intend to use,which IMHO is not lazy. \*\*_just the decision_ to better yourself in anyway is action.🙂 \*\* i compare this to say someone wanting to lose a few lbs. they arent lazy for wanting a quick-fix. its emotional. who the heck wouldnt want to work-out and excersize and sweat infront of other people who are also in shape _when they already look the way they want to?_ but _prior to looking the way they want_,excersize is a chore because they are unhappy with themselves physically\*.\* maybe not a perfect analogy but you get the jist. ---
**Author:** ![tacitus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@tacitus](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/tacitus)\ **Post date:** [March 10, 2007, 6:13pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/78 "2007-03-10T18:13:36Z")
Getting through with style There are those people who are remarkably skillful at geting through life, so I have to think that “success” with others is a large skill set… it is a wise idea to avoid **fragmentation** and **comparmentalizing** … as if to think there is a specific box filled with love skills… thats mostly a load of marketing BS that has next to nothing to do with real life… like you may find yourself in social groups, meetings on one hand, parties with a business edge to them, hanging out and shooting the breeze, sometimes small clusters of men brushing up against small clusters of women… and there’s a hell of a lot of signaling on three levels, the top level are the overt, obvious, intentional signals, (in intention-speak, what “you mean to mean”), then there is a middle level, sometimes referred to a **liminal communication** which is that slippery communication that is semi-conscious but still has some conscious intentionality to it, the meaningful looks, the subtexts, the double entendres, and then there is also a rich world of fully unconscious communication, this is closely related to recurring life patterns, “why does this ALWAYS happen to me ?”, things we identify as fate or patterns of events that occur around one person and not another… which I think is also connected to shamanism, sorcery, divination practices, and sometimes revealed through the use of pyschedelic materials that may cause a sudden sharp awareness of the third layer… the sad fact is that our culture has massive surface fixes and almost no resources available to deal with the third level self, where so much of the action is. ---
**Author:** ![CuriousPUA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@CuriousPUA](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CuriousPUA)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2007, 5:54pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/79 "2007-03-11T17:54:20Z")
> [@steveo](#): > > I mostly agree with what you’re saying here CuriousPUA. > > I will say this though; the problems occur when men or women try to fit the other into categories. It has never worked and never will. That’s what makes us unique and individualized in our approaches to life. > > I know that there are women on here who loathe me for me being what I am, and I’m OK with that. It’s the genuine that makes me who I am. > > As an individual I sometimes boast about my success with women as if they were a trophy. This is a fault that I recognize within myself and strive not to do it. That is why I stopped my results post after I realized I was doing it again. I live a lifestyle I choose freely to live, but this does not give me carte-blanche to force it on others. > > A little bit of background is needed to understand why I choose this lifestyle. When I was a boy growing up, I was very popular, into sports, had brothers who were very popular and that got me some interesting moments with girls, but by no means did it get me where I needed to be as a man. Unfortunately I was a great guy always doing nice things and soon I learned that this course of action caused me great discomfort in my life. > > Sure everybody loved SteveO, but every one of my relationships with girls withered and failed until soon we always became just friends. This added little credibility to myself as a person. People talk to people and soon I was the nice guy all the girls could trust and talk to as a friend. > > At 17 years old I was the most popular lonely guy on the planet. It’s profound to look back now and realized what impact that had on my life. I joined the US Army. I did everything tough; Ranger school, Demolitions, Air Assault, Tact Currier (if you know what the last one is then you have an idea what I was into, but you know I also cannot elaborate). > > Did this make me tough? Well in some aspects it taught me discipline and determination and heck I could spend a night drinking a bottle of Tequila and still make the 5K run in the early morning, but all-in-all I was still lonely. > > After I got out I was one tough bastard with a rather hardened view of the world, but believe it or not my solace was to be nice to women. Somehow it was ingrained in my chivalrous upbringing that a woman was to be treated as a princess. What I failed to realize was this did not mean let them walk all over you as a man. > > Many, many heartbreaks later and severe bouts of depression I transformed my desire to be loved by women into a love for food. It was a long psychological spiral to wards oblivion that finally got me to where I am today. One day I said that’s it and changed my life. > > I believe, IMHO, that many guys experience some type of social letdown with women. They come to validate their lack of experiences with over eating and destructive behavior. There was a time I called women foul names and hated all of them but still desired them as a warm body, but only physically. My mental anguish caused great suffering and yet from my dawn a new day had arisen. > > It took me a very long time of self understanding through diet, exercise and most importantly meditation to come to understand that my life has a direct impact on all of society. For the first time I realized that it wasn’t, nor it couldn’t be society having an impact on me, but it was my reality and I was making it what it was. > > I changed my outlook and read everything I could. I downloaded 10 gigs of ebooks and sorts off the net and read everything. I made myself understand that I could not be affected by anyones thoughts of me. I am me and I am happy with me. Affirmations are predominately the single most important step you can take to change yourself. The first step must be to recognize what you are and set your path. > > I realize how there are men who feel jaded in the game of life and love. I realize there are women who feel mistreated in life and love. It is and always shall be. What I try to understand is the pain and hurt I felt when I was confused and acted out in regressive behaviors to belittle others (women). It was an angry time in my life and I tried to hold it in until it boiled over and affected those around me. > > Now I have come to an understanding that certain things must be done to garner attraction from women. Regardless of those who stand by and judge me without ever first even knowing me, I am very much a kind and loving man toward women. I have learned from the MM and DYD that attraction is not a choice and in order to survive in the game you need to trigger attraction. Does this mean that I am a mean and nasty womanizer, who wants nothing more than to demean women (fuck em and leave em)? No, this means with my skills I am able to capture that initial spark of attraction and utilize it to build a great relationship. > > Coupled with PUA material and my personality, the man that I am, I am able to build and keep meaningful relationships. You may call it what you like, you may call me what you like. > > Yes there are strong women and men on this forum, but please let us understand the difference between strong and hateful. A person, regardless of gender, who is strong is brilliant in my reality. One who is able to observe and even though disagrees with someone or something is strong enough to do so without attempting to belittle those. Everyone is entitled to their opinions, yet this does not give anyone a right to call someone names or say they know that persons life. > > Keep it in check here folks, the Internet is a place where many, if not all, like to boast. It allows the opportunity to anonymously say what you otherwise would bite your tongue about. Some members would not bite their tongues, but would rather unleash a tirade about how what differs from them is horrible and wrong. In doing this they have failed to understand the beauty of differing perspectives. > > Please keep an open mind to everybody’s opinion regardless of how wrong you believe it to be. > > PS. Leaving an unsigned negative rep is childish. If you got something to say please post your view. With understanding and open minds will be the only way our differences are settled, or at least come to medium that yes as unique individuals we all shall have differences. > > Sorry about the rant. Yeah, people, if you saw what I said as me trying to read your thoughts you misinterpreted it. All I was trying to do is help guys and even some women. Because through experience have I and countless other guys seen a very strong pattern in women, that is why I can sometimes come across as a “mind-reader”. But the reality is, if it was true with 10.000 women out there from various cultures and ages, it’s probably the same with the next woman out there (even if she denies it). I’m not even saying it’s so, but take it as it is and make up your own mind about it. Aside from that, let me state that I do not care about my “rep” so I do not care if you anonymously give me bad rep. On the other hand, Steve, this is actually very common with guys. I see it all the time. When you talked about your resentment towards the non-physical side of women, yet craved their presence I was practically hearing what numerous guys have experienced. Also, hitting that rock-dead-bottom and then being so fed up you just had to change, again, very common. Guys will often not change until they have a total breakdown. They will often refuse advice because their ego created barriers and those barriers have yet to be broken down so they can hold their hat in their hands and just let go of former beliefs and learn from a neutral point with no prejudice. - **This is what some of you guys in here need to do so you can use the information out there to help you.** You who read this and SteveO, did you notice that a lot of your problems were do to how good you were with women ? I mean, this goes out to all the women out there, that if you think guys put much value into other things as you women do you’re probably pretty wrong. What we value and what guys see as an main indication of how successful they are is pretty much their skill with women and their experience with them. If a guy says “I’ve slept with 10 women” to a guy that has slept with 2, they’ll almost always assume position depending on that. So the guy with more experience and skill can always use that to retain his status. CAN YOU THEN IMAGINE WHAT BAD SKILLS WITH WOMEN CAN DO TO A GUY ? Please understand that most of what guys build their confidence around is their ability to attract women. That’s why when a rock star with little ability gets women thrown at him he can get miserable because he knows that it was not really his skills that got him the women. So he doesn’t know what he did right and what wrong. It’s like if you’re bad at math as a kid because you didn’t study that hard and then all of a sudden you get really good for no apparent reason, it fucks you up because you’ve ingrained the belief that studying hard gets you places. Uhm, that was a segway, but an interesting thought I thought I would share it 🙂 All in all, Steve, great job and you’re just another example of what should be inspirational to guys who have not yet walked that path. ---
**Author:** ![CuriousPUA](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6a8cbe/32.png) [@CuriousPUA](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/CuriousPUA)\ **Post date:** [March 11, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368/80 "2007-03-11T18:29:20Z")
> [@](#): > > I’ve never done ANYTHING in terms of sex I regret. I have never had a one-night-stand in my life. > > In fact, cards on the table here.. > > I will be 40 in less than a month, and can here and now hand on heart say, I have slept with two men - ever, and one of those used to beat me up daily for just under 8 years, rape me, torture me to levels you could not even BEGIN to contemplate, and made me terrified to open my eyes every morning. > > Scary, huh? > > So no..we don’t ALL do things after one night out clubbing that we regret, and while many of you may think I’m an oddity, I prefer to think of myself as having been extremely unlucky, surviving ONLY because of the man who is NOW my SO -who is the salt of the earth, never tries to play mindgames or convince me something is anything it is not, and simply is the best thing that has ever happened in my whole life. That’s great. I really liked hearing that you’ve started on a better path. > [@](#): > > So..take from that what you will. I have been a clubber since my late teens, and still am twice a week, and never have any urges to go with anyone else. Then probably you’re a rare breed to withstand a potential relationship with a great man that could offer you good things. Or you’ve never been hit on by the right guy. I don’t know but what I do know is that superior naturals or PUA’s, in my experience have gotten almost every girl they’ve approached. Now THAT is scary…(If you’re a woman… if you’re a guy, it’s not so scary, it’s fantastic to know you can get any girl out there if you work towards it.) > [@](#): > > I am possibly one of the most WYSIWYG women you are ever likely to encounter, and I am NOT impressed by any PUA moves. There, you’ve said it yourself: You are rare, and that’s cool but as I was writing this short article and those posts I had in mind what MOST (note, not “all”, just “most”) girls are like. This is really interesting because you said you were not affected in any way, the techniques and theories behind pick up. Well, here are the basics: 1. Have the girl laughing, it makes her feel good for a short time. 2. Bond with her on a deep level, it makes her feel good for a long time. So my question is this: You’re over-all not affected by these two steps and that every man that uses one of two or both will have impact on you and most likely will never build even a slight attraction within you ? I love to get your thoughts here so don’t misinterpret my responses as a way to shut you up because they’re not. I actually enjoy discussing this because I’ll often times gain a little wisdom here and there. > [@](#): > > Read the numerous threads on this. I lost 56 rep points over three days for speaking up on behalf of many of the women here about this fact, but I didn’t care then, and I do not now either. That’s too bad, it probably sucked, especially if you’ve built up rep points for a long time. But you’re cool so no worries, they’ll show up after a whilw. > [@](#): > > START reading what the WOMEN here say they do and don’t appreciate in a man, STOP thinking with your dicks, and REALISE you should become grounded. > > THAT, is how you will succeed with women. Yes, probably the women on here have things you could benefit from. But realize that women tend to frown upon men that TRY (consider this word) to get somewhere with them. A alpha man does not try, the man they seek does not TRY ! He DOES. He is what he is and is genuine in all he does. We are considered manipulative when discussing this because we’re WANTING something and trying to get somewhere… that’s why a woman will never ever tell you how and when you should do things for her or to her. She’ll say: “OH! I don’t want to tell you, you should know !” - Wow, that just pisses us of doesn’t it ? 😉 Just a little distinction for you guys. Anyways, when you ask a woman what she want in a man she’ll 1) Access her logical brain and 2) Imagine the super high value, model/CEO guy lying in bed, so of course she’ll say stuff like be nice to me and honest. 3) Tell you things that are affected by her former experiences with men. (So if she’s like Ail, with little experience but the experience she has got is negative or abnormal, she’ll tell you things based on that experience.) So I’ve given you some reasons to listen to women and take value from what they tell you, BUT I’ve also told you why you should not take many of the things they tell you. Like I said in a former post of mine… If women knew how to be good with them, why are there ONLY guys teaching other guys how it works ? Our moms have tought us throughout our childhood. Did her teachings work ? Did you become a real alpha man with so many options your head was spinning ? Just think about it, I’m not telling you what to think, just that you should read what I said and view your own experiences and see if they align with what I say… [Previous page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368.md?page=3) [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/tips-and-thoughts-for-you-who-worry-about-your-looks/2368.md?page=5)