# two girls and me. Desperate need of help. **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [September 3, 2008, 4:39pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765 "2008-09-03T16:39:57Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 4:39pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/1 "2008-09-03T16:39:57Z")
A year ago I would never of thought I’d have to make this thread and it just goes to show you have to be careful what you wish for. I’ve been hanging around with some old friends for the past couple of months and a new social circle has formed which includes the two girls, girl a and girl b. They are best friends and have been for years. Basically a generic teenage situation has arose. Both girl a and b like me, they’ve both told me they like me and have had arguments about me. I am not interested in girl a other than friendship however I am very interested in girl b, there is a LOT of chemistry there and she is someone I would genuinely like as a long term girlfriend. The problem is I don’t want to ruin the friendship in anyway as there going to be living together in a few months. There have been times when I really should of made a move on girl b (the other night we where talking with our heads six inches apart) and I don’t want to delay making a move for much longer now incase she becomes uninterested. Has anyone any advice on how I should go about this situation, I’m totally lost on what to do? ---
**Author:** ![mark-in-dallas](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mark-in-dallas/32/860_2.png) [@mark-in-dallas](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mark-in-dallas)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 4:55pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/2 "2008-09-03T16:55:42Z")
I think you’re in a no win situation wildflower. I hate to say it but I think there’s a very good chance if you move on girl b, girl a will feel jealous or betrayed and the friendship will become shaky, at best. Girl a and b are friends too and you said they will be living together. If they are good friends, girl b would and should reject you out of consideration for girl a, knowing that she likes you too. If girl b does get involved with you and somehow manages to keep her friendship with girl a, how long do you think that relationship will last once the girls are living together. Or another scenario is that you get involved with girl b and girl a writes both off both of you. Now the relationship started off on the note of killing a couple of good friendships, and girl a having to find other living arrangements. Sorry buddy, but I think you’re in a tough predicament and will likely have to choose between friendships and a potential relationship, and if you choose the relationship you’ve got to be prepared for the fallout. I know that’s not what you wanted to hear, but I’m not the type to sugarcoat a situation and just tell you what you want to hear. Best of luck to you though! ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:00pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/3 "2008-09-03T17:00:55Z")
lol I’m glad you tell it like it is, I was thinking the same thing pretty much. My only resentment I have towards girl a is that I’m no where near as close to her as I have become with girl b. She would become jealous but I think thats a selfish atatude considering we don’t even vibe. oh well, at least I know ammo is working. ---
**Author:** ![BiGGieK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@BiGGieK](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/BiGGieK)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:06pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/4 "2008-09-03T17:06:18Z")
Bonk em both! Have a threesome, that way, neither of them should get jealous. 😃 K ---
**Author:** ![mark-in-dallas](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mark-in-dallas/32/860_2.png) [@mark-in-dallas](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mark-in-dallas)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:11pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/5 "2008-09-03T17:11:01Z")
Yeah it may be a selfish and jealous attitude, but it is human nature! If you liked a girl, let her know that you liked her, and had another friend that was into her too, and he ended up dating her, you would feel a bit hurt, jealous and betrayed too. You might not show it on the outside, but inside you couldn’t help but feel so. Just trying to watch out for you buddy! Remmy was in a similar situation just a couple of weeks ago. Here’s the thread: [melting in philly](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/melting-in-philly/13735) ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:15pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/6 "2008-09-03T17:15:44Z")
Yeah I guess, although I wouldn’t be prepared to fall out with him over it, especially if he got on with her better in the first place. Thanks for the link, I’ll check the thread out now. ---
**Author:** ![BiGGieK](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@BiGGieK](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/BiGGieK)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:17pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/7 "2008-09-03T17:17:44Z")
> [@WildFlower](#): > > The problem is I don’t want to ruin the friendship in anyway as there going to be living together in a few months. On a more serious note 😉 Ya reckon that girl B is ‘the one’? as you said. You can see her being long term, or are you just after a root? :o Mate, if you are seriously keen on her. Go for it. I’m sure the other girl will get over it, besides, they can work it out themselves- the whole friendship thing. K ---
**Author:** ![Phya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@Phya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Phya)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:58pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/8 "2008-09-03T17:58:37Z")
> [@BiGGieK](#): > > On a more serious note 😉 > Ya reckon that girl B is ‘the one’? as you said. You can see her being long term, or are you just after a root? :o > Mate, if you are seriously keen on her. Go for it. I’m sure the other girl will get over it, besides, they can work it out themselves- the whole friendship thing. > > K +1 I wish I could type more, but if they are really friends, they will stay friends, with or without you. Probably not worth a ONS, but if she’s worth it, go for it. As Biggiek said, it might even turn out really nice. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 5:58pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/9 "2008-09-03T17:58:51Z")
‘the one’ hmm thats tough considering I’m 20 and not very experienced in relationships. On the other hand shes the first girl in as long as I can remember I’ve bounced of so well, I’m totally scared at how fast I’ve fallen for her and I’m sure it’s mutual. I’ve had so many IOI it’s unreal and shes even said to me directly that she likes me. There’s loads of kino and sexual tension but Mystery method says that If i don’t kiss her soon I never will. If it weren’t for girl A I would of done by now but I don’t think it’s as simple as going in for a kiss which would probably have repercussions. I think to resolve this I will need to talk with both girls which means putting myself out there and running the risk of looking like an AFC. This sucks but I know I’ll regret not doing anything in years to come. ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 6:02pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/10 "2008-09-03T18:02:02Z")
Thanks guys for the advice, I’m gonna “go for it” for sure, I’ll regret it if I don’t. Any advice on how to go about “going for it” thats my sticking point here. I was thinking of explaining my feelings for girl b to girl a and hopefully girl a will be sympathetic and the word will get through to girl b via grapevine. ---
**Author:** ![iamstretchypanda](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/iamstretchypanda/32/1228_2.png) [@iamstretchypanda](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/iamstretchypanda)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 6:32pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/11 "2008-09-03T18:32:17Z")
Hmm. Tough position. A couple of things: If you are hanging around girl A its OK to do AFC things because you WANT to get into the friend zone. Keep in mind the difference between kissing and making out. Kissing will still escalate kino but won’t put Girl B in as tough a position with girl A. Talk to them. Good luck :]. ---
**Author:** ![Phya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@Phya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Phya)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 6:39pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/12 "2008-09-03T18:39:23Z")
> [@WildFlower](#): > > Thanks guys for the advice, I’m gonna “go for it” for sure, I’ll regret it if I don’t. Any advice on how to go about “going for it” thats my sticking point here. > > I was thinking of explaining my feelings for girl b to girl a and hopefully girl a will be sympathetic and the word will get through to girl b via grapevine. I wouldn’t. Ask her out yourself, or just go and hang out casually, but alone. Be direct, don’t rely on the grapevine. You can definitely talk to girl A about dating her friend, but you aren’t asking her permission. I would probably date first, ask questions later. ---
**Author:** ![iamstretchypanda](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/iamstretchypanda/32/1228_2.png) [@iamstretchypanda](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/iamstretchypanda)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 8:14pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/13 "2008-09-03T20:14:52Z")
> [@Phya](#): > > You can definitely talk to girl A about dating her friend, but you aren’t asking her permission. I would probably date first, ask questions later. Agree’d. A fun date with some kissing then talk to girl A. Girl B will know whats up if you guys are kissing 😛. ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 4:20pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/14 "2008-09-04T16:20:09Z")
Thanks everyone for the advice. I saw them both last night and they’ve made up again. Had a good talk with girl b, she reaffirmed that she liked me and kept asking “do you like me?” to which I replied “you already know the answer and besides I like to keep a little bit of mystery” I still on and I’m going to make a move tonight. ---
**Author:** ![Wrlprchnx](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wrlprchnx/32/1360_2.png) [@Wrlprchnx](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Wrlprchnx)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 3:57pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/15 "2008-09-05T15:57:28Z")
My best solution would be to directly approach A and just tell her that you like her friendship… but it’s friends chemistry that you have with her… not romantic - Say your interested in her friend B and ask for help with B – If she feels like she helped set you two up then she will be much less likely to feel jealous when she sees you together. (of course it could backfire horribly… I don’t know the girls personalities enough to really tell() ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 9:01pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/16 "2008-09-05T21:01:47Z")
I’ve decided I’m just going to escalate loads of sexual tension and then go in for the kiss. It’ll be on sunday but I’m already pysched up, might try and make it not a big deal incase I pysche myself out. I now need to decide on the perfect mix. I’m gonna be carrying a lot of togos round with me thats for sure. Do I want attraction, comfort or loads of socials? I’ve got till sunday to do a lot of puzzling. ---
**Author:** ![river](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/river/32/934_2.png) [@river](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/river)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 9:27pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/17 "2008-09-05T21:27:10Z")
> [@WildFlower](#): > > I was thinking of explaining my feelings for girl b to girl a and hopefully girl a will be sympathetic and the word will get through to girl b via grapevine. She may still be hurt that you didn’t pick her, but I’d think she’d at least respect you for being up front with her. ---
**Author:** ![WildFlower](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/wildflower/32/1260_2.png) [@WildFlower](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/WildFlower)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 10:04pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/18 "2008-09-05T22:04:10Z")
Well I had a really good time with her yesterday but it was just as friends and I think shes realising we can have a cool time together and not be romantically involved. ---
**Author:** ![Hazard](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/hazard/32/1153_2.png) [@Hazard](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Hazard)\ **Post date:** [September 6, 2008, 9:30pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/two-girls-and-me-desperate-need-of-help/18765/19 "2008-09-06T21:30:37Z")
I would definately tell girl b im into her… date 1st… then tell girl a afterwards. You aren’t seeking girl A’s permission… Date girl B - have a good time. If everything clicks and you guys are “official” then tell girl A if you know she likes you. tell her how important her relationship is to you but make sure you tell her that right now theres a “spark” with girl B. Call me s dcumbag but i wouldn’t tell girl A shes just a friend and will never be anything more. Who knows… girl B might not work out… girl A could develope into a friends with benefits situation if that happens LMAO! In the end… just make sure girl B wont be jealous of you and girl A being friends. ~Haz~