# What I Learned from the GF!! Is it true? **URL:** \ **Category:** Lounge\ **Created:** [April 7, 2008, 5:23pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873 "2008-04-07T17:23:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![smn1234](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/smn1234/32/2430_2.png) [@smn1234](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/smn1234)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 5:23pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/1 "2008-04-07T17:23:18Z")
First thing’s first… I’m glad to be back. Read a lot of interesting stuff here since I’ve been away. > [@](#): > > You last visited: January 12th, 2008 Anyways, here’s something I learned from the GF while talking to her few days back: Her co-worker asks her why women dress nice (to clubs?) and don’t really care when they’re complemented. She (and her women co-workers) answer(s) that women always have one guy they’re trying to impress. For instance, when women come to a club and pick a guy that they have a chance with it’s him all or nothing. True? The co-workers also say that the whole PUA / Gaming thing doesn’t work because it’s not really you impressing the woman but if the woman wants she’ll work to impress you. True? So… how do [pheromones](https://a314.com/) work here? Seems with pheros this is no longer the case… ---
**Author:** ![mark-in-dallas](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mark-in-dallas/32/860_2.png) [@mark-in-dallas](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/mark-in-dallas)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 6:24pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/2 "2008-04-07T18:24:20Z")
I remember reading somewhere that women don’t dress for us at all, but dress to compete with each other. I’ll somewhat buy the idea of it not being us impressing the women, but them deciding on whether they are interested, then working to impress us if they are. It part of the natural selection process and courting ritual. We initially try to impress the women and get them interested, and if we succeed and catch their interest, they will work to impress us. Then, rinse, wash and repeat, ---
**Author:** ![Karmiel](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/karmiel/32/2234_2.png) [@Karmiel](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Karmiel)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 6:32pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/3 "2008-04-07T18:32:07Z")
Personally my club outfits consist of nice shoes, jeans and a nice top, because when I go clubbing I go to dance with whoever wants to, guy or girl, not stand around with a drink in my hand waiting to be picked up, but I don’t ignore a nice guy who wants to talk or dance. I mean you go out to have fun, right? But I have to agree, the PUA method doesn’t really work when you can tell it’s canned material and insincere, but if you can pull it off then you’ve got something going! ---
**Author:** ![tisha23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/53a042/32.png) [@tisha23](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/tisha23)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 6:51pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/4 "2008-04-07T18:51:14Z")
Want the truth LOL People are individuals and each of us do what we do for our own reasons. But I will add my insite. There are a few reasons we dress nice. 1) we do it for ourselves, for our own self confidence. 2) we dress nice for attention male and female and its true alot of us compete with one another but its a friendly compitition. Its all part of the fun that karmiel mentioned. Attention is fun and boosts your confidence. > [@](#): > > that the whole PUA / Gaming thing doesn’t work because it’s not really you impressing the woman but if the woman wants she’ll work to impress you. True? True and false PUA tactics can work on less experienced women. But the experienced ones and I dont mean sexually experienced just the women who have been clubbing frequantly may act impressed but they seldom are. You see they know what your doing and sometimes we play along just for fun and sometimes we ignore it. > [@](#): > > when women come to a club and pick a guy that they have a chance with it’s him all or nothing. True? Depends on who is there, some women may have 1 target guy they are interested in and others may just being hanging out to socialize and if they meet someone nice that interests them great. How do pheromones fit in, They make the experience easier, Its been said again and again they wont create something from nothing but if there is a bit of a interest or attraction they give you a edge. It helps you become that target guy. Tisha ---
**Author:** ![PheroQuirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9e8a1a/32.png) [@PheroQuirk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/PheroQuirk)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 7:35pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/5 "2008-04-07T19:35:14Z")
> [@smn1234](#): > > First thing’s first… I’m glad to be back. Read a lot of interesting stuff here since I’ve been away. > > Anyways, here’s something I learned from the GF while talking to her few days back: > > Her co-worker asks her why women dress nice (to clubs?) and don’t really care when they’re complemented. She (and her women co-workers) answer(s) that women always have one guy they’re trying to impress. For instance, when women come to a club and pick a guy that they have a chance with it’s him all or nothing. True? The co-workers also say that the whole PUA / Gaming thing doesn’t work because it’s not really you impressing the woman but if the woman wants she’ll work to impress you. True? > So… how do pheromones work here? Seems with pheros this is no longer the case… Per tacitus there are at least 4 components of any interaction - your conscious mind, your subconscious, her conscious mind, her subconscious. So… a) Favour observation of how people actually behave over what they say. Most people don’t really know what is going even with their own behaviour, although the enlightened may have more insight than hoi polloi. b) Putting your best face forward just can’t be a bad thing. ‘PUA’ tactics run the gamut of physical confidence, inner game, outer game and logistics. I promise you that if your body is closed down and your shoulders are hunched and you are jerky and keep your head down then many fewer women will find you attractive than if you have a good vibe. Influencing tactics work even if you know they are being used on you (check out all the courses Jasmin has been on) - provided they’re not being clearly used with a bad intent. If they work on CEOs making decisions about billions of dollars they certainly work on people you talk to in a nightclub. See this for a different situation [Charlie Munger : THE PSYCHOLOGY OF HUMAN MISJUDGMENT](http://vinvesting.com/docs/munger/human_misjudgement.html) Of course pheromones also work on you even if you know they’re being used. Just trying a few sprays of spaceland and betanol with a couple of beers and see how long it is before you catch yourself blabbering. BTW one final comment is that it’s to some extent up to you to set the frame (Swingcat’s prizing stuff). ‘You are really sexy, but can you cook?’ ---
**Author:** ![PheroQuirk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9e8a1a/32.png) [@PheroQuirk](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/PheroQuirk)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 7:38pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/6 "2008-04-07T19:38:29Z")
> [@smn1234](#): > > Her co-worker asks her why women dress nice (to clubs?) and don’t really care when they’re complemented. She (and her women co-workers) answer(s) that women always have one guy they’re trying to impress. For instance, when women come to a club and pick a guy that they have a chance with it’s him all or nothing. True? The co-workers also say that the whole PUA / Gaming thing doesn’t work because it’s not really you impressing the woman but if the woman wants she’ll work to impress you. True? > So… how do pheromones work here? Seems with pheros this is no longer the case… The girl who organised the evening and dragged everyone out will often be ovulating. Not that she’s consciously thinking ‘fertile… must meet guy’, but there are subtle emotional influences that affect behaviour. ---
**Author:** ![sugarspice](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sugarspice/32/1772_2.png) [@sugarspice](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/sugarspice)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 7:44pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/7 "2008-04-07T19:44:19Z")
PUA are like pheromones…they don’t work if you’re not her type. But they do help you from blowing it if you are her type. Sometimes guys confuse my FRIENDliness with attraction or some type of point gains. My friendliness is based on my desired to be liked/popular, show off I got hit on. Like hey I feel safe, and you look like someone who will buy me and my girlfriends a drink. If he is cute enough, he is on the curiosity list for me. The curiosity list is the pitty point list. It means I will answer the phone and let him buy me dinner/movie. 😃 The curiosity list is the list I have for guys that can help me forget Mr. X I’ve been obsessed over. It’s rare for me and I think for many women, to be obsessed over an PUA, because they weren’t on our radar for very long or at all. Once in a while we have no one in mind so we obsess over the next thing that gives us attention. Most of the time we do have someone, but usually it’s not the guy at the bar. If I eye someone I usually allow other men to talk to me. Again, to give him abit of a chase challenge. But yes, that’s the one I want. If he acts I will let him in. If he doesn’t I will give the guy I’m with more attention. Either way I don’t lose. ---
**Author:** ![sugarspice](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sugarspice/32/1772_2.png) [@sugarspice](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/sugarspice)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 7:54pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/8 "2008-04-07T19:54:22Z")
PS I dress nice so people can look. But I prefer them admiring it than commenting. If it’s a friendly comment without intention to bed me I am flattered. But if it is an obvious hook up line I get annoyed. ---
**Author:** ![smn1234](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/smn1234/32/2430_2.png) [@smn1234](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/smn1234)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 10:11pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/9 "2008-04-07T22:11:32Z")
IDK if I worded this right… but that’s what she said in effect. Girls dress to impress essentially one guy. Girls konw what they want. Usually it’s 1 or 2 guys at a club, not so much the rest, that they have their eye on. It seems though that Pheromones break these boundaries, even without talk in some cases - [such as](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/a-highly-effective-pheromone-combo/10194)? ---
**Author:** ![Curiouschic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f19dbf/32.png) [@Curiouschic](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Curiouschic)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2008, 10:33pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/10 "2008-04-07T22:33:11Z")
> [@smn1234](#): > > IDK if I worded this right… but that’s what she said in effect. > Girls dress to impress essentially one guy. Girls konw what they want. Usually it’s 1 or 2 guys at a club, not so much the rest, that they have their eye on. > It seems though that Pheromones break these boundaries, even without talk in some cases - [such as](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/a-highly-effective-pheromone-combo/10194)? I still dont agree with the one guy mentality. That would completely undermine the drunken one night stand that clubbing is so well known for! Girls tend to look around the bar and pic out eye candy that they may want something else from too, but we often will pick back-ups and if there is just no one of interest we may settle for a girls only evening. A guy who steps out and shows us that he is worth an extra look can totally have a chance that night. There are so many tangents at play to say we want one guy only at the bar is limiting and not considering all variables… CC 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![smn1234](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/smn1234/32/2430_2.png) [@smn1234](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/smn1234)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2008, 12:15am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/11 "2008-04-08T00:15:57Z")
AHHH Thank you curioschic!!! You reminded me. The ONE case, she told me, where none of this applies is when a girl is very drunk…!! THANKS 🙂 hehehe ugg my memory fails me… at such a young age too ☹ ---
**Author:** ![sugarspice](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sugarspice/32/1772_2.png) [@sugarspice](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/sugarspice)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2008, 3:31am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/12 "2008-04-08T03:31:56Z")
> [@Curiouschic](#): > > I still dont agree with the one guy mentality. That would completely undermine the drunken one night stand that clubbing is so well known for! > > Girls tend to look around the bar and pic out eye candy that they may want something else from too, but we often will pick back-ups and if there is just no one of interest we may settle for a girls only evening. A guy who steps out and shows us that he is worth an extra look can totally have a chance that night. > There are so many tangents at play to say we want one guy only at the bar is limiting and not considering all variables… > > CC 🙂 Oh yeah that back up guy. I wouldnt say 1 or 2 then. More like 5 or 10. Sometimes the moment happens so fast. Like oh cute. Next thing you know your grinding on the dance floor not knowing what happened. For me and probably only me, I don’t think about sleeping with him. I think “oh he’s cute, I might like him.” And I always wonder why I end up in bed with him…ok not always… maybe twice. teehee. Back to the point there were cases that I saw a cute guy, and was mildly interested yet a more witty cooler guy came along and was just so fun to dance with. I totally forgot about the cute guy. My point is I don’t want guys to believe that she already made up her mind. No way, you can’t deny tall buff and handsome or any model of perfection, but that by no means does it mean he’s won. He just had a head start. ---
**Author:** ![phernoob](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/phernoob/32/180_2.png) [@phernoob](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/phernoob)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 1:49am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/13 "2008-04-11T01:49:15Z")
> [@smn1234](#): > > IDK if I worded this right… but that’s what she said in effect. > Girls dress to impress essentially one guy. Girls konw what they want. Usually it’s 1 or 2 guys at a club, not so much the rest, that they have their eye on. > It seems though that Pheromones break these boundaries, even without talk in some cases - [such as](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/a-highly-effective-pheromone-combo/10194)? Sorry but OD on spaceland - whatever- anyway you are soooooo cute ---
**Author:** ![sugarspice](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/sugarspice/32/1772_2.png) [@sugarspice](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/sugarspice)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 3:45am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/14 "2008-04-11T03:45:46Z")
> [@phernoob](#): > > Sorry but OD on spaceland - whatever- anyway you are soooooo cute Noob, you crack me up. I can just see u at a bar right now…“I’m not drunk ociffferrrr…i’m on spaaaaacccceeeelaaaanddd…” ---
**Author:** ![smn1234](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/smn1234/32/2430_2.png) [@smn1234](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/smn1234)\ **Post date:** [April 11, 2008, 4:22am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/15 "2008-04-11T04:22:23Z")
haha Spaceland.. it’s the NEW high ---
**Author:** ![smn1234](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/smn1234/32/2430_2.png) [@smn1234](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/smn1234)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2008, 4:45am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/16 "2008-04-17T04:45:52Z")
anyways, I’m still concerned about this. This was confirmed by a girl **friend** of mine that I asked. _eeK_ is it me? lol ---
**Author:** ![phernoob](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/phernoob/32/180_2.png) [@phernoob](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/phernoob)\ **Post date:** [April 17, 2008, 1:22pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/17 "2008-04-17T13:22:00Z")
> [@Curiouschic](#): > > I still dont agree with the one guy mentality. That would completely undermine the drunken one night stand that clubbing is so well known for! > > Girls tend to look around the bar and pic out eye candy that they may want something else from too, but we often will pick back-ups and if there is just no one of interest we may settle for a girls only evening. A guy who steps out and shows us that he is worth an extra look can totally have a chance that night. > There are so many tangents at play to say we want one guy only at the bar is limiting and not considering all variables… > > CC 🙂 Yea, I totally agree with your theory. There is always a plan A, B & C. Dang, who wants to be bored? ---
**Author:** ![Phya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@Phya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Phya)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2008, 8:51pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/18 "2008-04-18T20:51:49Z")
> [@smn1234](#): > > anyways, I’m still concerned about this. > This was confirmed by a girl **friend** of mine that I asked. > _eeK_ > is it me? lol There’s no need to be concerned. Some girls are that way, some are not. Some guys are out and about trying to get with every cute girl that comes their way. Other guys already have a cute girl around, so they aren’t looking for others. Then still some other guys aren’t interested in the many cute girls, but have their eyes only on the most gorgeous, vivacious girls. Point? Every guy is different, so is every girl. That particular GF of yours might be that way, but not every girl is. Also, what PheroQuirk said applies. Actions speak louder than words. I’ve seen many girls tell me they would never even speak to a guy that is a liar, or cheats, etc. Then, the next thing I know, they’re with the guy that lies, and cheats, etc.. So even if they’re consciously trying to avoid a certain type of guy, they still find themselves in situations where they are interacting with said guy every now and then. And ultimately, let’s hypothesize that what your GF said is true. Well, she never really gave any criteria for who that one guy would be. So even if what she said were true, you couldn’t apply it at all. How would you become that **one** guy? You don’t know what qualities she values in that one guy. On top of all of that, we get back to where we started, every girl is different, and therefore, that one guy isn’t going to be the same guy every time. So where does that leave you? You know a little more about that GF of yours. You know a little more about _ **one** _ club-goer’s perspective. That’s really about it. There’s absolutely no need to be concerned about what she said. Also, PheroQuirk, when you have the chance, can you clear up your inbox? I wanted to send you a PM. ---
**Author:** ![Phya](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@Phya](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Phya)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2008, 10:24pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/19 "2008-04-18T22:24:06Z")
By the way, in case any of you haven’t read PheroQuirk’s link, if you are interesting in Psychology, I highly recommend reading the whole thing. There were lots of great insights that are commonly overlooked or undervalued. I myself learned new things about Pavlov and his experiments. Thanks PheroQuirk! ---
**Author:** ![Curiouschic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f19dbf/32.png) [@Curiouschic](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Curiouschic)\ **Post date:** [April 18, 2008, 10:28pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873/20 "2008-04-18T22:28:01Z")
> [@sugarspice](#): > > Oh yeah that back up guy. I wouldnt say 1 or 2 then. More like 5 or 10. Sometimes the moment happens so fast. Like oh cute. Next thing you know your grinding on the dance floor not knowing what happened. > > For me and probably only me, I don’t think about sleeping with him. I think “oh he’s cute, I might like him.” And I always wonder why I end up in bed with him…ok not always… maybe twice. teehee. > > Back to the point there were cases that I saw a cute guy, and was mildly interested yet a more witty cooler guy came along and was just so fun to dance with. I totally forgot about the cute guy. > > My point is I don’t want guys to believe that she already made up her mind. No way, you can’t deny tall buff and handsome or any model of perfection, but that by no means does it mean he’s won. He just had a head start. So true, many back-up guys, initial thought isnt “I want to lay him”. It definetly isnt looks that seperates you from the pack. It is really “that something different” we need to see some sort of spark to allure us 😃 > [@phernoob](#): > > Yea, I totally agree with your theory. There is always a plan A, B & C. Dang, who wants to be bored? Gotta love the nights when you are on the prowl 🙂 Boredom is NOT an option, bring on plan a-Z 😛 [Next page](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/what-i-learned-from-the-gf-is-it-true/10873.md?page=2)