# When will you guys realize that LOOKS are almost all that matters!?

**URL:** <https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619>\
**Category:** Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports\
**Created:** [August 17, 2009, 5:04am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619 "2009-08-17T05:04:58Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 10

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**Author:** ![MHarris](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/mharris/32/2107_2.png) [@MHarris](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/MHarris)\
**Post date:** [August 20, 2009, 7:56pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/182 "2009-08-20T19:56:02Z")

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> [@Butterfly](#):
>
> Here is a fit guide, you can see good and bad fit and how painful bad fit can look:  
> [Bravissimo | Big Bras, Lingerie, Swimwear and Clothing for D-KK cup women](http://www.bravissimo.com/perfectfit/getting-the-perfect-fit/default.aspx)
> 
> Here are a few good bras from the same site:
> 
> [Bravissimo | Bras, Lingerie, Swimwear for Big-Boobed Women](http://www.bravissimo.com/images/products/small/fyk7ata_sp.jpg)
> 
> [Bravissimo | Bras, Lingerie, Swimwear for Big-Boobed Women](http://www.bravissimo.com/images/products/small/vf25wha_sp.jpg)
> 
> [Bravissimo | Bras, Lingerie, Swimwear for Big-Boobed Women](http://www.bravissimo.com/images/products/small/pnc9blc_sp.jpg)
> 
> [Bravissimo | Bras, Lingerie, Swimwear for Big-Boobed Women](http://www.bravissimo.com/images/products/small/pnf7lia_sp.jpg)
> 
> What is best for a particular woman depends on her shape and size. In any case look for something that does not have stretch in the cup, a well engineered cut and good quality fabric.

Interesting. Thank you!

Is Bravissimo (cute name, btw) the Androtics or Apple of bras, btw, or would it be another company? I want to know who’s as engineering conscious as me, or has the eye of someone artsy and finicky like Steve Jobs.

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**Author:** ![Butterfly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/butterfly/32/1942_2.png) [@Butterfly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Butterfly)\
**Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 5:40am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/183 "2009-08-21T05:40:03Z")

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Bravissimo does not design the bras they sell, they have them made by other companies. The pattern designers are the ones with the engineering talents. Bravissimo do make really nice clothes. I study something nerdy and make clother for a hobby so I appreciate an engineering eye for clothing. Funny how far the topic derailed…the guy came looking for support and now it’s about bras, LOL.

Denec, you poor thing…At least it is weekend now soon.

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**Author:** ![magicj76](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/magicj76/32/1858_2.png) [@magicj76](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/magicj76)\
**Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:29am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/184 "2009-08-21T07:29:20Z")

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> [@MHarris](#):
>
> The Boston Phoenix covers this very topic.
> 
> [100 Unsexiest Men \> Boston Phoenix \> Rush Limbaugh, Chris Brown, Bernie Madoff, Alex Rodriguez, Rod Blagojevich, Adam Lambert, Jim Cramer, Christian Bale](http://unsexy.thephoenix.com/unsexy/)
> 
> These guys somehow do fine with the ladies.

Christian Bale unsexy ?!?  
I know that if I were a girl, I would be crzay about him.  
As a man, I’d really like to meet him and know him better. I believe this guy has a strong soul, something magnetic.  
And that brings another point : when looks do everything, people think there’s nothing to discover.

I live with this belief/challenge : find the good in everyone I meet. Find the positive thing that is hidden. Not always easy though, and disappointing with some (few) people, but so rewarding when you find it as people show it then and make everyone benefit from it.

As for social intelligence, I must admit I discovered the word here on the forum when some members were telling about the book, and I thought “wow ! That’s the exact wording of the feeling I’ve had for years”.  
It shows that many people are clever in logic but not socially. That’s unfortunately the case for my girlfriend.Sad. I hope our son won’t be like her.

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**Author:** ![magicj76](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/magicj76/32/1858_2.png) [@magicj76](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/magicj76)\
**Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 7:54am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/185 "2009-08-21T07:54:46Z")

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> [@Butterfly](#):
>
> A very good set of posts!
> 
> I think a fairly large chunk of the people who seek out good looks at the expense of inner qualites and beyond and above the appearance as an evidence of health and fertility, usually are trying to prove something to others. It is more about having a trophy to show “the other people” that they are worthy that about having a partner attractive to oneself, enjoyable to spend time with, trustworthy and admirable. When one puts the need for approval above the desire for pleasure, one lives for others first and foremost. And at that, a rather impersonal set of others that one seeks to impress. Very sad.
> 
> It is much healthier to accept yourself, gain approval from yourself and work on yourself until you get to the point where you are certain of being a person worth admiring and appreciating. The result is twofold: You get much more praise from others, and now for your permanent inner qualities and you feel much less need to receive praise because you start from a point of self acceptance, not a point of self esteem. Self esteem can be raised of lowered by validation from others, self acceptance needs nothing from others.
> 
> The person who accepts himself (or herself) does not need to compromise on important things to acquire trophies and status symbols to prove his worth. He is much less likely to be a compulsive consumer of things that bring him very little pleasure, but cost him much to meet his status symbol needs.

Thanks butterfly.  
I would rather say that being social is not easy, as we can"t live without others and without a link to others. Yes it’s good to avoid living for others only, but living for oneself only doesn’t bring happiness, does it ?  
Hard psychology of life ! 😛

Concerning relationships and love and looks, yes, many people just want significance and think that significance is being famous by being incredibly rich, living with a sexbomb, driving a very expensive car and living in a house twice as big as Neverland ! In love, they want a “trophy”.  
And they end up alone. Why ? cos they started alone and for themselves only.  
That’s why so many couples are not happy and why divorce has been increasing for years. People want someone to live with them, not to live with. Many people (my girlfriend included) want to get before they give. They won’t give until they get. they don’t smile to people who cannot bring them something concrete. Is that love and seduction ? Or just pure business ?

In Europe, I think the 2nd World War has changed many things and has brought a frustrating paradox :  
Hitler and his “world” have shown so much violence and brought so much death that people have started thinking about themselves. “think about yourself cos life is so short”. so people have got unity together against the enemy AND egoism as they started living for themselves. “You’re my friend against the enemy but my enemy in this unity”.

In the USA, I guess the Watergate showed disillusion. “Even the President can be a liar and spy on people, so why not anybody ?” No more trust.

And then, generalization ! “One person hurt me, so anybody can hurt me”  
“(S)He did so , so anybody can do so”.  
BUT those people don’t generalize in the positive way like “oh this person did this good thing, so anybody can do good things”.

Be suspicious. Be paranoid. Don’t trust anyone. think that anybody can be the enemy, for everybody is the enemy. Look strong. Don’t smile. Be hard. Don’t give. Take everything. Worry, don’t be happy. Do what you’ve been taught, don’t try to think and learn something new that could make you unique. What a wonderful program for happiness in society.

"Oh J, you’re being sarcastic and negative !

- No, see the good side of this terrible program : solve the problem of overcrowding"  
I’m being ironic again. We learnt what happens when someone want to solve the problem in such a psychological program.

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**Author:** ![denec](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/denec/32/1730_2.png) [@denec](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/denec)\
**Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 1:42pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/186 "2009-08-21T13:42:48Z")

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> [@Butterfly](#):
>
> Denec, you poor thing…At least it is weekend now soon.

Thanks..unfortunately i have to work this weekend as well…on top of that i stepped in dog crap on the way to work..and it is very rare to see that on streets of NYC…what a way to start my day…

only good thing is it looks like my phero shipment will be delivered today at one point it looked like they were not going to be delivered they were still in memphis when i checked this morning but i see they were delivered to my mailroom…woot!

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**Author:** ![tezza23](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/tezza23/32/1375_2.png) [@tezza23](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/tezza23)\
**Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 3:46pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/187 "2009-08-21T15:46:39Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> i stepped in dog crap on the way to work..and it is very rare to see that on streets of NYC.

Probably because NYC is so crowded, the dog crap is stuck to the shoes of the people who stepped in it before you got there!

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**Author:** ![Butterfly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/butterfly/32/1942_2.png) [@Butterfly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Butterfly)\
**Post date:** [August 21, 2009, 4:00pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/188 "2009-08-21T16:00:37Z")

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> [@magicj76](#):
>
> Thanks butterfly.  
> I would rather say that being social is not easy, as we can"t live without others and without a link to others. Yes it’s good to avoid living for others only, but living for oneself only doesn’t bring happiness, does it ?  
> Hard psychology of life ! 😛  
> .

You are most welcome.

Actually, though it may be paradoxical I think we need to accept ourselves and work on ourselves first so we can give real attention to other people. If a guy is using a new car to bolster his self esteem, worrying about being seen talking to the right girls, worrying about his height, his clothes etc. he is not going to be able to give others his full focus. If another guy knows he is a worthy person, knows he is appropriately dressed, does not care who he is seen with and is at ease in his skin his mind is free of worries. This gives him the opportunity to spend attention on everything outside himself. He can notice the great speech Thomas gave, the pretty dress Jennifer is wearing etc. If you seek pleasure, and looik for things to enjoy, you find things that are good about others, enjoyable, praiseworthy. People feel very much connected when they are enjoyed, appreciated, admired. They feel loved a little when you love something they did, made, chose or said.

It does take practice to learn to notice and enjoy the underlying qualities people have and to express them in a way that the person will also enjoy. But truly healthy people are not afraid of work, if those works result in greater pleasures in the future. The mark of adulthood is to be able to take delight in delayed gratification. But when you are able to not just admire Jennifer’s nice dress, neat house and well decorated cake, but also her eye for beauty, her diligence and her attention to detail, she feels much more loved and connected. Some if you saw the charismatic, knowledgeable and warm person Thomas is behind the good speeches, the interesting lectures and the lively conversations over a glass of wine. At this point, it is no longer necessary for them to do great things to impress you, for you can notice the underlying principles in the small things. You do not have more, or experience thing that are more interesting in and of themselves or meet better people, but when you live from a perspective of joy and love, you appreciate everything more. This makes you richer, more satisfied.

> [@magicj76](#):
>
> Concerning relationships and love and looks, yes, many people just want significance and think that significance is being famous by being incredibly rich, living with a sexbomb, driving a very expensive car and living in a house twice as big as Neverland ! In love, they want a “trophy”.  
> And they end up alone. Why ? cos they started alone and for themselves only.  
> That’s why so many couples are not happy and why divorce has been increasing for years. People want someone to live with them, not to live with. Many people (my girlfriend included) want to get before they give. They won’t give until they get. they don’t smile to people who cannot bring them something concrete. Is that love and seduction ? Or just pure business ?  
> .

When you accept who you are and live from a perspective of love, not one of fear, it is easy to give. You are not looking to get hurt the least, to take the fewest risks. You do not worry about what could go wrong, but anticipate what could go right. It does not need to be monetary gain, it is just as beautiful if the baby boy smiles back at you or the old couple waves at you. Even if people have nothing concrete to offer, people themselves are something to appreciate. Everyone has admirable bits in his or her character. When you can appreciate strongly everything you see in the world, you gain so much everyday, giving away a smile, or a dozen smiles, or a hundred smiles do not make you significantly less rich. People who fear to lose out by giving an unreturned smile are not rich emotionally.

We say you give when you give someone attention, but when you give a person real attention you are actually opening yourself to joy and beauty. There is no winner and no loser, if anything you are both winners. That is how amazing nature is! To people lacking in empathy, there is only one cake. Our social nature gives us the opportunity to multiply cakes so we can share them, have them and eat them too! People who are worrying about not getting a big enough slice of the cake are so pittyable, they are really selling themselves short. It is bad business too to be stingy with smiles, affection, attention. It is much more seductive to be a joyful, loving and appreciative person.

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**Author:** ![chads](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/2acd7d/32.png) [@chads](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/chads)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 12:51am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/189 "2009-08-22T00:51:25Z")

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> [@Advanced](#):
>
> Social interaction skills dont mean a damn thing if girls brush you off within seconds.
> 
> Cosmetic surgery can greatly improve one’s appearance. I have already gotten 1 procedure and I am planning 6-8 more in the future.

[The HisTory of Michael Jackson’s face](http://www.anomalies-unlimited.com/Jackson.html)

Might want to check out a history of Michael Jackson’s face before you go too far.😉

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**Author:** ![Xman0142](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/13edae/32.png) [@Xman0142](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Xman0142)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 4:22am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/190 "2009-08-22T04:22:59Z")

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so someones a troll if they dont go along with the mainstream idea?

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**Author:** ![justaguy2116](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ec9cab/32.png) [@justaguy2116](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/justaguy2116)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 8:48am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/191 "2009-08-22T08:48:25Z")

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> [@Xman0142](#):
>
> so someones a troll if they dont go along with the mainstream idea?

Nah, having an opinion doesn’t make someone a troll. Expressing an opinion in a way that is insulting to others and clearly intended primarily to disrupt and agitate is what makes someone a troll.

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**Author:** ![Zackary](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/898d66/32.png) [@Zackary](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Zackary)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 10:47am UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/192 "2009-08-22T10:47:00Z")

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\<Gasp\> I can’t believe I am going to reply in this troll post…

Advanced… Buddy if you actually went through with cosmetic surgery, then you bought into the worst scam that ANYONE could have ever bought into. Whats plastic surgery running these days?? $5k or more? Not to mention the possible side effects?? (I’m not even going to go into examples of stars who did this, and came out looking like freaks)…

All the plasic surgery in the world won’t help you loose your virginity if all you do is sit at you computer and reply on multiple forums trying to instigate arguments.. Try investing that same time into going out and talking to people..

Now on to the PUA material arguments that you have tossed around so much, and proclaimed as fake/scams etc etc… Most of the material that is available has been gathered by multiple sources. The first step to any of these systems, programs etc etc are to take a look inwards and project your best self. I have yet to read any PUA material that says you should become something you are not. In fact all the PUA materials I have read STATE with 100% certainty that you have to be congruent inside and outside to achieve results.

Now to toss on a little advice that has worked wonders for me.. When I want to meet a girl, thats exactly what I do. I don’t set goals durring the conversation, nor do I have expectations on how the interaction is going to go.. I live in the moment, and enjoy it.. I don’t care if I get her number, if she goes home with me, or if I go home with her. I go out to have fun, if anything else happens it’s a bonus to the night and a great story to add to the collection.

Finally to wrap up the snake oil argument… Unless you try them yourself and have feedback on their effectiveness or lack of, your opinion is not welcomed in this community. Just like in the real world, If you want your opinion to have value and merit you have to have experience in the product you are talking about.

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**Author:** ![Advanced](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/58956e/32.png) [@Advanced](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Advanced)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 9:33pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/193 "2009-08-22T21:33:23Z")

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> [@Butterfly](#):
>
> - That said, if a girl has to choose between dating a repulsive guy with an okay character and an okay looking guy with an ugly charcter, she will generally choose to stay home alone. **Even if the girl herself is unattractive.**

Here it is…FROM A FEMALE USER ON YOUR OWN SITE!

She admits that even ugly girls will turn down ugly guys even if they have an okay character!

Now think about what she said…if UGLY women dont want us if we are ugly even if we have a decent character…what the hell CAN we get? That’s right NOTHING. Not even girls at the very bottom of the totem pole want us.

See…even extremely unattractive women can afford to be PICKY PICKY PICKY because they have an extreme advantage in the dating game. Even they have sooo many options.

I had a female cousin who used to live with me. She was almost 300lbs, had horrible acne, was extremely rude, seldom showered, pathological liar, klepto, etc. I dont normally slam family members but she repeatedly stole from me and my parents…and one time i got blamed for something she stole.

Anyway she NEVER had a shortage of guys to chose from. I know because guys were constantly coming over to pick her up for dates. She is now living with a rich man who is also decent looking.

But anyways…back to what I was saying about Butterfly. Butterfly, thank you for proving my point.

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**Author:** ![justaguy2116](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ec9cab/32.png) [@justaguy2116](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/justaguy2116)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 9:51pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/194 "2009-08-22T21:51:37Z")

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> [@Advanced](#):
>
> Here it is…FROM A FEMALE USER ON YOUR OWN SITE!
> 
> She admits that even ugly girls will turn down ugly guys even if they have an okay character!
> 
> Now think about what she said…if UGLY women dont want us if we are ugly even if we have a decent character…what the hell CAN we get? That’s right NOTHING. Not even girls at the very bottom of the totem pole want us.
> 
> See…even extremely unattractive women can afford to be PICKY PICKY PICKY because they have an extreme advantage in the dating game. Even they have sooo many options.
> 
> I had a female cousin who used to live with me. She was almost 300lbs, had horrible acne, was extremely rude, seldom showered, pathological liar, klepto, etc. I dont normally slam family members but she repeatedly stole from me and my parents…and one time i got blamed for something she stole.
> 
> Anyway she NEVER had a shortage of guys to chose from. I know because guys were constantly coming over to pick her up for dates. She is now living with a rich man who is also decent looking.
> 
> But anyways…back to what I was saying about Butterfly. Butterfly, thank you for proving my point.

So the fact that I know one ugly guy who gets laid all the time doesn’t prove that there’s more to attraction than just looks… but the fact that you can point to one woman who says she’d rather stay home than go out with an ugly guy proves that looks are all that matters? Yeah, that’s consistency right there. 🙄

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**Author:** ![Advanced](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/58956e/32.png) [@Advanced](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Advanced)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 10:14pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/195 "2009-08-22T22:14:37Z")

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> [@justaguy2116](#):
>
> So the fact that I know one ugly guy who gets laid all the time doesn’t prove that there’s more to attraction than just looks… but the fact that you can point to one woman who says she’d rather stay home than go out with an ugly guy proves that looks are all that matters? Yeah, that’s consistency right there. 🙄

Your friend is an anomaly.

Butterfly however describes the norm. 99% of girls think like butterfly and will not even give an ugly guy with decent character a chance…even if they are ugly themselves.

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**Author:** ![Butterfly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/butterfly/32/1942_2.png) [@Butterfly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Butterfly)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 10:30pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/196 "2009-08-22T22:30:53Z")

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You are pulling things, way, way beyond the scope of what I said. The same happens to an okay looking guy with ugly chracter. But you don’t hear people coming up saing they can stop looking after themselves because they are a jerk anyway.

I guess you just want to tell us that you have no hope ever of finding a girlfriend and you want our support for you making excuses to make the least of your life and to hack up a healthy body with 6-8 surgeries. If you are constantly being rejected, even by girls you met in class, at work, online etc. you have more about you that bars attraction than just looks. Even if you got all that surgery done, you won’t have women falling into your lap.

It won’t bring you what you want. You are like the man who believes his poverty makes him miserable and is hoping the lottery will save him while postponing his life. Then it all goes wrong when he finds out money is not coming to magically save him from his problems. There is no good fairy that is going to make your life free of effort, no mommy to satisfy your every need, no saviour to tell you that you are good and go to heaven. Welcome to adulthood. You either take responsibility for your happiness, or accept being unhappy.

First of all, you being so focussed on proving your manhood by losing your virginity clues us in that you have done little that makes you a man. Sex is not a tool to reach manhood, sex is an expression of love and a source of physical pleasure. Second, instead of doing something about your situation and empowering yourself in some way, you seek to disempower yourself by laying the blame on things you cannot control. Women do not want a man who shirks responsibility, but a real man they can respect and trust, a man who focusses on what he can control and improves that.  
And **that** is where your problem lies.  
Thinking and acting like a man will improve your hormones, your posture and your motorics and make you more attractive on all levels. It also helps your career and social life. Surgery won’t make you grow a pair, won’t make you move and smell like a man. At best, women just don’t really notice you after the surgery, at worst, they will be just as repulsed.

Feel free to give up, but realise that **you** are still responsible for making yourself miserable.

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**Author:** ![Advanced](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/58956e/32.png) [@Advanced](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Advanced)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 10:34pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/197 "2009-08-22T22:34:41Z")

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> [@Butterfly](#):
>
> First of all, you being so focussed on proving your manhood by losing your virginity clues us in that you have done little that makes you a man.

WOAH WOAH WOAH!!! WHEN DID I EVER EVEN SUGGEST THAT???

This has NOTHING to do with “proving my manhood” or anything like that.

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**Author:** ![Advanced](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/58956e/32.png) [@Advanced](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Advanced)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 10:39pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/198 "2009-08-22T22:39:49Z")

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Let me spell this out for you…and anyone else who assumes this…I DO NOT CARE ABOUT “MANHOOD”. I am being denied romantic love and sex…two things I naturally desire and IMO it is cruel I am being denied these things.

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**Author:** ![Butterfly](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/butterfly/32/1942_2.png) [@Butterfly](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Butterfly)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 10:48pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/199 "2009-08-22T22:48:14Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> - Looks do not matter _that_ much, unless you are really repulsive. Few people are, most people look so-so to decent, so on average, looks are not as important as you think.
> 
> - Most truly good looking people are also above average in other qualities. The underlying factor is good genes. Good and bad qualities tend to cluster.
> 
> - The difference between spoiled food and dry bread is bigger than the difference between a burger and a sirloin steak. If something is repulsive, you will not eat is if you have any other option, even if that other option is skipping a meal and being hungry. It works the same way with looks.
> 
> - I’d rather date an okay looking guy with great character than a great looking guy with okay character.
> 
> - That said, if a girl has to choose between dating a repulsive guy with an okay character and an okay looking guy with an ugly charcter, she will generally choose to stay home alone. Even if the girl herself is unattractive.

This is the original post that Advanced is taking completely out of context. He turned the repulsive guy into a merely unattractive one and the just okay character into a decent one. Then turned the unattractive woman staying home alone into an extremely ugly woman with lots of dating options.

He just sees what he wants to see and plays the ‘poor hopeless me’ game.

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**Author:** ![Advanced](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/58956e/32.png) [@Advanced](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/Advanced)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 10:49pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/200 "2009-08-22T22:49:43Z")

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> [@Butterfly](#):
>
> This is the original post that Advanced is taking completely out of context.

You have no room to talk about taking stuff out of context…you COMPLETELY made up lies about me…claiming I only care about losing my virginity to prove my manhood…when i never said anything REMOTELY like that.

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**Author:** ![pheroclone](https://sea2.discourse-cdn.com/flex016/user_avatar/pheromonetalk.com/pheroclone/32/1312_2.png) [@pheroclone](https://pheromonetalk.com/u/pheroclone)\
**Post date:** [August 22, 2009, 11:18pm UTC](https://pheromonetalk.com/t/when-will-you-guys-realize-that-looks-are-almost-all-that-matters/31619/201 "2009-08-22T23:18:03Z")

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> [@Advanced](#):
>
> Your friend is an anomaly.
> 
> Butterfly however describes the norm. 99% of girls think like butterfly and will not even give an ugly guy with decent character a chance…even if they are ugly themselves.

As someone who admits that he has no experience with women, (due to an OBVIOUS lack of knowledge of female psychology) what makes you think _you_ know what “99% [of] girls think like???”

You also misunderstood Butterfly. In her example she used a “repulsive” guy with an “okay personality.” She was absolutely correct that most girls _would_ choose to stay home instead of dating this person. But what you failed to realize was that a “repulsive” guy with a great personality, or even a good personality, WILL be successful. In fact, it’s not even so much about having a good personality that will aid in your success with women, as much as eradicating the bad traits from your personality. That’s 100% true. (And _I_ actually have the knowledge of female psychology to back it up)

> [@Advanced](#):
>
> Here it is…FROM A FEMALE USER ON YOUR OWN SITE!
> 
> She admits that even ugly girls will turn down ugly guys even if they have an okay character!
> 
> Now think about what she said…if UGLY women dont want us if we are ugly even if we have a decent character…what the hell CAN we get? That’s right NOTHING. Not even girls at the very bottom of the totem pole want us.
> 
> See…even extremely unattractive women can afford to be PICKY PICKY PICKY because they have an extreme advantage in the dating game. Even they have sooo many options.
> 
> I had a female cousin who used to live with me. She was almost 300lbs, had horrible acne, was extremely rude, seldom showered, pathological liar, klepto, etc. I dont normally slam family members but she repeatedly stole from me and my parents…and one time i got blamed for something she stole.
> 
> Anyway she NEVER had a shortage of guys to chose from. I know because guys were constantly coming over to pick her up for dates. She is now living with a rich man who is also decent looking.
> 
> But anyways…back to what I was saying about Butterfly. Butterfly, thank you for proving my point.

You’re so certain that you’re right that you are blind to the contradictions you keep making in your argument. YOUR words were, “Your friend is an anomaly.”

a⋅nom⋅a⋅ly  
/əˈnɒməli/ [uh-nom-uh-lee]  
–noun, plural -lies.

1. a deviation from the common rule, type, arrangement, or form.
2. someone or something anomalous: With his quiet nature, he was an anomaly in his exuberant family.
3. an odd, peculiar, or strange condition, situation, quality, etc.
4. an incongruity or inconsistency.

Considering the fact that everyone on this board has agreed that an “ugly” guy can, with a good personality, be very successful with women, I would argue that your cousin is an anomaly, rather than all the people we collectively know who defy your “anomaly.” I wouldn’t have brought this point up, except for the fact that one of the main staples of your argument has been, “Well that one, ugly guy who you know is just an exception to the rule. (An anomaly, if I may.) **You can’t base an entire argument based on one person who you happen to know.** ” May I ask, what did you do with the example about your cousin?? You based your argument on simply one person, who you just happened to know. Bam.

Furthermore, the fact that you ignored all of the positive comments on this thread, which people took time out of their/my busy day/s to write (and I assure you, we, unlike yourself, _do_ have lives) in order to help YOU, a “troll,” as they like to call you, is appalling. Instead you focused on the single comment that you thought you could manipulate and twist to aid you in your frivolous argument. But then again, your argument made no sense and actually hurt your case by once again proving your ignorance and stupidity, so I guess I should thank you for proving my point.

Advanced, thank you for proving my point.😃

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