it may sound weird, but i’ve never really had to “meet the parents” before. my past serious relationships either were local, and i just said hi to the mom and dad in the living room as i picked her up, or the relationship ended before meeting the parents. also, sarah is the most serious relationship i’ve ever had, so it’s a bit different.
when sarah met my parents, we all went to dinner with a family friend. he’s a complete chatterbox so we spent most of the night listening to his stories. it really made things less awkward for sarah. she was afraid my parents were going to grill her or something – not at all the case. they just wanted to put a face to a name.
anyone else ever been in this situation? for example… do i hug the mom? ever? (sarah hugged my mom after dinner was over) what are the rules with buddying up to the dad? etc.
i’m sure everything will go fine. i’m just tweaking out right now to get it out of my system so i can be calm on the big day. any suggestions of what not to do are welcome too.
the answer to the big question is yes: a314, ishine, cttm2, and a sexual something for alone time with sarah.
Man, when I first met my wife’s parents her mom hated me. She likes me now, but she literally told me that she didn’t like me also the fact that I wasn’t of their religion didn’t help her like me. However, she’s nice now but yeah it sucked. However, don’t let this story scare you, not all parents are dicks, just try your best to remain calm, polite, and remain a gentlemen with manners. Open the door for her mom and Sarah for example if you happen to go out with them, not like if you’re trying to show off but just do it like if you do this everyday for other people. Just little things like that, and remember to most importantly be yourself.
You don’t have to fake being someone else, because eventually they’ll get to know the real you, but as mentioned just remain polite and all that good jazz. Since it will be your first time meeting them a simple handshake will suffice, a hug would be appropriate for when you’re saying good bye. For the dad a stern handshake with a slight pat of the back would be showing confidence. Not necessarily a pat per say, but just a light touch of his shoulder blade back area with you palm although this is not necessary if you don’t feel comfortable with that.
The most important thing here is making sure you remain respectful (and show respect) to Sarah in front of her parents so they can see that she’s in good hands. Perhaps pulling her chair out for dinner, or taking her plate to the kitchen after dinner would be showing care. You know, just little gentlemen things like that. You’ll be good man, just stay confident.
Excellent advice! I wish I could add something more to that but I found that being polite and being yourself are the two most important things. Good luck!
thanks for the advice. sarah said her parents are excited to meet me so i guess the feeling is mutual – i want to make a good impression and they do too so they don’t seem like the “awkward parents.” i’ve been told that there isn’t much contact with her parents planned, just simple meet and greets throughout the day between activities. hopefully that eases things up a bit.
Yeah, no problem jay you’ll be good. Meeting parents for the first time is scary no matter what though, but I’m sure you’ll do good. Just remember that you’re dating Sarah, not her parents so even if they end up not liking you for some reason don’t worry.
If you try to act differently than you would normally act you will feel insincere… insincerity puts alarm bells in parents heads simply because if you are being insincere with them, whose to say you aren’t being insincere with their daughter?
Be true to yourself - that is the person that their daughter fell in love with and if they know their daughter at all, they will recognize that.
I’m very rarely a fake person… my ADD doesn’t allow me the focus to act for long enough to really pull it off. I’ve never had a girlfriends parents dislike me despite the fact that I tend to have a personality that sometimes takes some getting used to.
