My wife and porn

Lounge
1

Hello everyone, very long time since I’ve posted. I’ve got a hell of a situation here, and I’d appreciate your insight as I don’t have many other people to talk to about this.

A couple months ago my wife and I were going over our budget, figuring out what we could adjust to make money a bet less of a worry. I work full time, get a decent salary we can live on, but nothing really large. My wife is doing the stay at home mom thing (we have two boys, 7 and 11) and is looking to get back to work at least part time once our 11 year old matures a bit so he can watch his brother after school.

So we were talking about things she could do from home to bring in some cash, or at least something she can do while the kids are at school since she has several hours to herself every day. We weren’t having much luck, when suddenly she says “Hey, why don’t we sell porn?” I old her the market is already saturated with people selling porn movies, we’d probably just end up with a bunch of low quality smut in a box somewhere.

Apparently I misunderstood. She says “No, I meant why don’t we MAKE porn and sell it?”

I honestly didn’t have a good answer for that one. I thought about it, pondered the possible outcomes, researched the market and companies that would buy amateur porn from a couple of plump almost 30 year olds…but in the end I had to tell her I wasn’t comfortable with it, mostly because of the kids. I didn’t want them to find out Mom and Dad fuck on tape for money (decent money, but still)

Since then, she’s hinted at the idea a few times. I’m pretty sure she still wants to do it. I suggested instead of making movies she “works” for one of the many webcam sites for a while, see what that does. She isn’t too keen on that idea because she doesn’t want to have to put on a show, she just wants to have sex on camera and sell it. I’m not annoyed with her hinting at all, I’m just starting to second guess my answer. As one of my friends that I have told put it…there’s millions of pornos, what the chances of the kids (or family, coworkers, friends) stumbling on the few we may have clips in?

So, what are your thoughts?

2

It could wind up costing more than you expect. You will probably still need a business license. You’ll have to look into the legalities of running your at home business as a company, get a fictitious name permit, file the proper tax forms, get a lawyer to have proof of age verification for yourselves. and of course figure out the actual logistics of distribution. If selling hard copies you’ll need to consider that almost nobody uses tapes anymore so you’ll need a set up for DVD production (and even that medium is in decline)
Barring webcam shows, the main way people get their porn these days is via download from websites. You’ll need to set one up with age verification so you don’t get popped for selling pornography to minors, get a paypal or similar set up for monthly member rates. Figure a way to promote the site, and accept that every member you get will likely upload the video to a file sharing or torrent site so that for each paying account you have, several dozen to several hundred people will be able to get your product for free.

There are a lot more factors involved than just lights, camera, action. My best advice would be to see if you as a couple could get sponsored/hired by an already existing company and do it for a regular pay rate. Less potential income but less investment risk.

3

Thats a tough situation, I don’t think anybody knows if its right or wrong for your relationship except you.

I recommend sitting with your wife and writing out a pro’s and con’s list.

4

The idea was to make the videos and sell them to existing companies. There’s several I found that once you fill out the legal paperwork they have, all you have to do is send in the videos and they quote you a price. Of course, anything they pay isn’t taxed, so we’d have to hold some of the earnings back…figured 25% to be safe.

And we’ve talked this up one way and back down again a few times, we just lack outside opinions. Not exactly something to bring up at the next family gathering! :open_mouth:

5

Aside from whatever moral/cultural opinions people may have, it’s one simple thing. You do whatever you feel is necessary and acceptable to provide for you and your family. Whatever it is, if you do it so that you can better provide for you and your kids, then go for it.

There are a lot of jobs out there that are “socially acceptable” that plain out scam people and do worse by them. So in reality, as “bad” as that sounds, things like that happen and if you feel that it’s something you have to do, then do it.

I don’t know anyone who would look down on anyone if they did it to help support their family after all options were weighed out. And quite frankly anyone who berates or thinks of you as anything less than a human being is a POS anyway.

6

That’s really something only you and your wife can decide but really really weigh the possible ramifications first. Like John said the pro’s and the cons.

When weighing those pro’s and cons remember your weighing not just for you and your wife but for your kids as well. Everything you do will effect them in there lives.

I know you will protect them from that side of your lives but if there friends or there friends parents discover this it can make there lives a nightmare. If its something you pursue be sure to take extra precaution in that area. Kids have a way of knowing when there parents are hiding something.

Another thing to remember especially selling anything on the net is you have to be sure minors dont get a hold of it which is not always easy. Legit porn sites go through legal hell trying to keep kids from obtaining there products and still they get it and legal action can be taken against everyone involved so be sure to consult with a lawyer before you pursue this.

There is nothing wrong with doing what you have to to support your family. I dont judge anyone for that. Just be sure if you do it do it right because there is a lot more involved then just filming yourself having sex and selling it on the web.

Tisha

7

I say do it. Live life and have lots of sex and if you can, get paid :slight_smile:.

8

Has anyone checked the legality of making porn at the family residence in relation to Family Services? Some state laws could make your life a nightmare concerning your kids, then that would become a matter of public record.

9

Well, according to Indiana Code 35-49-3-1 it’s a Class A misdemeanor to: send or bring “obscene” matter into Indiana for sale or distribution or offers to distribute, distributes, or exhibits to another person obscene matter. So I can’t bring porn into Indiana or sell it to another person. I’m pretty sure selling to a business isn’t the same as selling to Joe Bob.

Code 35-49-3-2 says A person who knowingly or intentionally engages in, participates in, manages, produces, sponsors, presents, exhibits, photographs, films, or videotapes any obscene performance commits a Class A misdemeanor. So I can’t videotape, engage in, etc a “performance” (defined by law as any play, motion picture, dance, or
other exhibition or presentation, whether pictured, animated, or live,
performed before an audience of one (1) or more persons.)

Technically, I wouldn’t be video taping a performance as defined by law, because while taping there wouldn’t be anyone else watching.

But then again, we all know the legal system is so screwed up that if you fart wrong it’s a damn felony, and I’m no lawyer, so who knows?

10

Well I did a little looking and according to the United States Supreme Court the only place its legal to film porn is in CA which I found surprising and you need a permit. The law defines porn as any sexual act photographed or filmed for distribution or sale. They have more stuff about writing porn to. Now I cant say Indiana abides by this but from the laws you did post they seem a bit strict on it.

This may help explain to. First Amendment Lawyer - Creating Adult Content Outside California

Seriously think about sitting down with a lawyer before doing this. Every state is different and what may not even faze people in one state will send them into a morality riot in another. I know you think well no one will find it on the net but you never know. All it takes is one person who recognizes you both and all hell breaks lose.

If you didnt have kids in which this could effect I would say go for it. You do though so precede with the law on your side and knowledge.

Tisha

11

Caelas,

I know times are tough for everyone in this economy and I’m not judging you. I just want to say that no matter your reasons for considering/doing this, and no matter how cautious you are…there are going to be serious implications. Once it’s done and distributed there’s no telling where it will turn up and there’s zero chance of recalling/eradicating it. It’s out there for posterity and all the world to see. You’ll be screwed and not in a fun way.

Do whatever else you have to do but that. I may be the only one on this board who will actually come straight out and say it but since you asked for our opinions…I vote no. A big resounding NO. You don’t want to do that to yourselves and you really don’t want your children to have to face/deal with that kind of judgment/scrutiny under any circumstances.

Frankly, I’m not willing to take that chance. With my luck it would be broadcast at The World Series. Yea, go team.

I know you’re in a tight spot and that’s probably not what you want to hear but in good conscious, especially because of your children, I cannot encourage this.

Although if you do decide to forge ahead, please make sure you and your wife disguise yourselves (wigs, make up). I’m not kidding.

Bella

12

I was in this biz for a number of years as a web designer and affiliate.
I’ve been to the trade shows have met a lot of the people involved in this biz and I can say ultimately its something that destroys people. Even my lead designer would message me on some days something like, “I lost a little bit more of my soul today.” And he was just designing galleries / banners and ads.

I’ve met women who were seemingly okay and watched them deteriorate over a few years. I had to find talent for a client at one point here in Las Vegas and had models quoting me $300-$500 for a fairly lame scene in comparison to what is out there only to get a call from them days or weeks later saying something to the effect, “I’ll do anything for $50.” That is no joke.

Drugs are rampant, people who get into that business and I hate to sound judgmental, but this glass house is gonna throw some stones…they usually aren’t right mentally. Its a world full of damaged people with addictions and personality disorders.

Now I’m not saying that is your wife, or you. What I am saying is before you do something so desperate for money you really have to weigh how much your willing to commit to this.

You will never be able to run for so much as PTA president, because you will be found out. It could come to haunt your family in ways you’re not prepared for and would never consider happening.

As far as the law is concerned, it may be against the law to produce outside of California, but there are many states who just don’t bother with this issue because its a free speech issue and they just don’t have the time or money. But then there are certain counties like in Florida that go after anything they consider immoral with a vengeance.

I know of acquaintances that have been investigated, threatened with jail and some that were actually shot and killed in a raid because they were doing business in a foreign country.

There are costs and consequences to every decision we make, so think it through. If you have any questions PM me.

13

We’ve had several porn “producers” on the boards over the years and pretty much all are out of it now. There are a proliferation of free sites now so who is going to pay when you can get it for free?

I still say do what makes you happy :slight_smile:

14

I can’t see making a lot of money from just doing one video. You would probably have to do many videos to make much money. That would increase the chances of your children finding out. Maybe she should try extreme couponing. Zack and Miri Make a Porno was fictional.:slight_smile:

15

A number of former clients some very large companies have shut their doors because yeah, their stuff is just ripped and given away as soon as its released on line. Its a tough biz to really make money at anymore.

When I first started in the biz you could put up a doorway page with 1 single pic on it using a pay per click company and generate more income in a month than most people see in a year.

You didn’t get much for free. Site were built in a pattern called circle jerks where you got them clicking leading them to something else only to have them start completely over and they’d get so tired they’d just buy a membership.

Then someone got the idea to give 2 pics, then someone said, I’ll give 10 pics away and “steal” their traffic. That lead to full pages of pics, then short clips of videos and before you know it people were giving away the farm. And those were just the affiliates and producers.

Now you have the customers who start sharing on newsgroups and then youtube adult type sites and now there is no need to buy anything.

Yeah the internet is for porn, racism and copyright infringement LOL

But yeah there are some good things that have come out of it too.

16

I am not trying to give you any risky ideals or anything but how about those 1-800 phone sex things people call where you play a role and talk dirty and get paid. I am not sure if those are still popular but they may be.

Maybe that would be better then jumping right into porn. She would be safer with that because she would have more control. Its a 800 number so people dont know its you and you can turn it on and off so your not getting calls at all hours, just when the kids are at school. Of course I dont know what the laws in Indiana are about that though.

I am sure both you and your wife have talents outside of the sexual realm as well you just are not seeing them. There are lots of ways to make extra money. I work full time but I make a couple hundred dollars a month coaching on the side and I also do ghost writing for a few blogs and can make a $100 to $200 a month depending on how much time I put into it.

I used to mystery shop LOL Actually if you can get in with the legit companies you can make an extra $100 or so a month and get tons of free stuff.

I even wrote for a popular erotica site a long time ago. Nothing got published in hard copy but two of them were released as online short stories and I made some nice money from them.

Did you know there is a company that will pay you to advertise on your car with those magnetic billboards ? You just tell them how much you drive around and where you live and as long as its not in the boonies you can make money.

I know with all the scams on the net its hard to find something legit but it is doable.

Dont give up.

Tisha