Product and dosage:
p91 - grapefruit - 40 mcg per spray
Environment:
Home, doctor appointment, out and about with male friend
Self effects:
I’ve been in a bit of a pissy mood the past few days, due to having left my job, am on unemployment, and overwhelmed with paperwork, mail and a really boring online continuing education course that I need to complete in order to make myself more eligible for a job I am really interested in landing.
My friend had been bugging me to get out more, he’s just trying to help, I know, I’ve tended to isolate a bit too much lately, so I finally said I would go out and about with him. This particular morning, I really, really didn’t want to go, which made me even more prickly feeling.
Around 11:00 am, I applied two sprays (80 mcg) to my chest/neck region and hair. It didn’t cheer me up per se, but shortly thereafter I felt more mellow, less annoyed at the prospect of “hanging out” all day, when I really should stay home, procrastinating and staring at the mail and continuing education course I really need get started on.
Riding into town with my friend, he seemed more mellow too. I’ve never seen him angry or pissy (though I haven’t known him all that long). He can be a bit annoying sometimes, cracking jokes that are not so funny (though I do appreciate him, nobody’s perfect).
Doctor appointment:
The doctor appointment was a follow up for something the doctor had screwed up with a little, and I wasn’t feeling very kindly towards him. However, I somehow managed to keep my mouth shut, and my feelings to myself. More mellow than I would normally have been. Good.
Next stop, the thrift store. On the way, my friend tells me I look “hot” (and with no makeup on), which I don’t respond to, I don’t feel the same way towards him.
Thrift shop:
At the thrift shop, I was in the skirt section, looking for something comfy with an elastic waist, just below the knee, not too short, not too long. Another woman was already looking through that section as well, but then for some reason just started looking for and pulling out ones she thought might fit or look good on me. Interesting. She moved along, I kept looking through the skirts, and then another woman came along looking through the skirts for herself, but then also began picking ones out for me. Curiouser and curiouser…
Outdoors Touristy mall near beach hotels:
My friend wanted to go to a surf shop that was having a “grand opening”, that had some really good prizes. I really dislike shopping malls, and touristy ones are the worst of all. Somehow, it wasn’t so bad. Upon arrival, I went to use the public ladies room, and a girl in another stall was loudly popping her gum (which I really dislike). Normally I would have rushed out of the bathroom as quickly as possible, but for some reason this most annoying of sounds did not disturb me as it normally would have. (Note: chewing gum is a pet peeve, I hate seeing and hearing people chomping and smacking away at it, to me it seems vulgar and disgusting, my mom always said chewing gum makes a girl look “cheap”, so I think I got that from her).
12:45 pm, exiting the ladies room, applied one more spray 40 mcg chest/neck area. Went over to the surf shop where they were handing out raffle tickets, prizes, etc. It was a bit crowded, but I didn’t mind it as much as I normally would have…until…my friend suddenly popped a piece of gum into his mouth and began chewing it loudly, right by my ear…what is this, gum day or something? I kept trying to move away from him a little, but every time I did, he would just move that much closer. I think because he likes me a little. Because I haven’t known him all that long, I just tried to throw the hint, by telling about the gum-popping girl in the ladies room and how I thought gum was gross.. He totally didn’t get it.
They were doing the raffles every hour, so since my friend really loves these things, plus it was kind of a far drive, plus he has only been kind and thoughtful towards me, we hung out and caught the 1:00pm, 2:00pm and 3:00pm raffles. Didn’t win anything though.
My mood had been okay until he started the gum-chewing (which coincidentally was right after I had sprayed the additional 40 mcg at 12:45pm). I felt annoyed, and my irritation slowly rose throughout the afternoon, though I was quiet and tried to keep my grouchiness to myself.
At one point, he got something to eat, and I then also realized that he chews both gum and food with his mouth slightly open. I felt grossed out and felt like I just wanted to go home, but was quiet and instead excused myself to go check out the ladies room again. When we went to sit down on a bench in between raffles, he would sit too close, with his leg touching mine, and also scratch my back from time to time (my back wasn’t itchy, dammit). I kept trying to move away from him, in a natural-seeming manner, so as not to hurt his feelings.
By 3:00pm, I was so relieved to get out of there and get back into his truck. I was feeling much better, thinking we were heading back towards my house, but then…he took a right instead of a left at the highway. I said, where are we going?, he said, to another mall (which is way bigger, more touristy and way more crowded and awful than where we just came from). …ack!!!
At the other, worse (outdoors) mall:
4:00 pm. As we got out of the truck, I asked my friend why we were coming here, he said, just to cruise around, mingle. There was a special musician playing, in this center area, it was mobbed and full of tourists. I absolutely hated it, and just walked around with him, saying nothing. There were tables here and there, with special offerings such as ukulele lessons, lei making, ukulele making, etc. As we passed one, he jokingly asked, do you want to get “lei-ed”. Hahaha. I snapped, NO, and as we were near one of the exits, began walking back towards the parking lot, he had no choice but to follow.
I breathed a sigh of relief as we got back into his truck and started back towards home. Of course, he didn’t want to take me back home, so I directed him to some beach/waterfront areas that I knew and preferred - nice quiet beautiful spots that are not crowded, have no stores or tourists. We just cruised around, stopped here and there to look around, or walk briefly on an old creaky small boat dock and look down into the water. Ahh, much better…
Conclusions:
The initial 80 mcg of p91 was okay, mellowed me, but when I applied the additional 40 mcg less than two hours later, I became more irritable. So I think I OD’d a little with the additional 40 mcg.
My mellowing out later might have been due to getting away from that annoying mall, or possibly with my suspected “OD” dying back down to the more mellow effects I had earlier, or possibly a combination of both.
The unusual attention towards me at the thrift shop, where 2 different women started looking for a skirt for me, when they were at first just browsing for themselves, was interesting also.
I actually don’t mind crowded places, with the right person (or at least not with someone who keeps being unintentionally annoying as hell), or at night if I’m intoxicated in a nightclub environment, lol.
