Beansmike, welcomr to pherotalk! If you decide to buy from Androtics, be sure to post in the intro section for a gift cert worth 15 USD.
Phero wise I see you asking two different questions and finessing the two together may not be easy.
For a big guy who may be intimidating Instant Gentleman is a good choice… it’s not so good if your main problem is being seen as “just a friend”.
The social pheromones IH IO and Ishine are certainly must haves. Many guys overlook them but women are social animals and anything that helps a guy be seen as a social animal too is awesome.
Last are the products that contain androstenone. They will project a more sexual vibe but they also can make you more intimidating. Ammo is a good product to start with.