A [very] single lady...looking to put a ring on it.

Introductions - New Users, Say "Hello"!
1

Hi y’all.

I’m almost 30 and I’m making getting married a priority in life. I want to be committed with a man who makes my heart slam and my face tingle.
In order to do that, I’m working with a therapist (stomp those daddy issues once and for all) a dating coach (be a better partner and make better choices about who gets my time) a physical trainer (currently a Size 8 working toward a Mad Men curvy Size 4) and three stylists (hair, wardrobe, makeup).

Why am I being crazy-person about this? Because I’m clearly missing something about romance. I know that it’s a lot of effort but, this ain’t a game. Trying to make the full-woman improvements to make this happen, y’know?

I’ve been researching the forum for a few days, and wanted to give information that might help with what mones are recommended. Don’t mean to wordvomit, just trying to be thorough. My goal with pheromones is to come up with two scents:

Scent #1: Attract the Masses
In combination with effort in appearance and poise, I want men panting and devastated when I walk through a room. I don’t want cute or flirty. I want maneater. Showstopper. Dudes lining up to buy me drinks, women slapping their husbands as I walk by…you feel me. Crazy Wolfy - YouTube :slight_smile:

Scent #2: Keep Just One
Something to spark attachment in the man I choose to date. I’m not looking to hook up anymore or have more shallow encounters. I want a life partner. I know it’s more than pheromones, of course, but I want to spark deep longing and openness. To be on his mind all the time after our dates. Something to help take it from lust to love for that special guy and lock it down. Say Anything (1989) - YouTube

Some stuff about me that might help hone in further on the right mones.

Physical: I’m 5’4, very curvy and if I had a nickel for every time someone told me my face favors Janet Jackson…I’d have enough money to buy peace in the Middle-East. My smile/eyes get way more compliments than my body.

Lifestyle: I run two (tiiiiiiiiiny) companies and an urban development nonprofit. Making the world a better place is my raison d’etre. I get off on the pressure/power dynamics of business. Nothing makes me happier than travelling and getting to know people of other cultures through my work. I also sing and play gigs in small venues a lot. Very into my Christian faith and yoga/tantric practice is also a big deal. High energy and face paced life. I am always, always moving.

Social Reaction: I’m known for being very bubbly + engaging. When I’m at conferences I often become ‘the one to meet’. It just comes naturally. Not the showoff look-at-me type, I actually aim for a low profile. More important to me though is the work I do on purpose to make everyone feel seen, heard and important. Eye contact, interest in others. The stuff you can’t fake. People respond to that very well and I’m known professionally for the positive effect I have in making people feel great.

Because of my very young looking face and that I’m hella forever smiling, people think I’m a young kid…yet, people often say they’re very intimidated by me at first. Not sure which impression is more correct.

Where I’m having trouble:
The men I want most seem indifferent to me or not attracted. I attract men who are handsome but very selfish or immature. And, I haven’t been able to convert casual dating into a boyfriend in 4 years. This sucks and is why I’m really putting attention into fixing this area of my life.

Who I want to attract is inside: Laid back and accepting. Very clear on who he is and his life’s purpose. Unorthodox lifestyle (aritst, missionary, armed forces…something unusual). Passionate. Cares about humanity. Creative. NOT the typical Ken doll or clean cut 9-to-5 in a suit type. Something grittier and also not as typical alpha male. Musicians are my kryptonite. For the outside: Prettyboy face is my weakness! Skinny (yes: swimmer, basketball player, sufer. not so much: football, wrestler, bodybuilder) I care a lot more about his soul than other features.

Examples of my “type” are:
Rob Thomas (dude from Matchbox 20), Paolo Nutini, Brandon Boyd (dude from Incubus), Johnny Depp, Justin Timberlake. I’m only listing famous people here because it’s an easy reference point for the physical and personality flavor qualities that I’m talking about.

Pheromones are gonna be a tool in a full arsenal as I storm the bastille and get serious about finding the right man for me. Thanks so much for the help and I look forward to learning more about the community.

2

Wow… just wow… such an awesome intro!

Welcome to the forum!

Love the way you explained your situation and where you want to go. You are really breaking through your shell and getting out and GETTIN’ IT DONE. You have an awesome post going on…

Now, for you mones, I’d look to IS/b and IShine. The IS/b for the sexy kittenish vibe, like a Natalie Portman… I would also suggest you take IShine to highlight your bubbly and Engaging vibe so that any intimidation that you may show will erode with IShine and a smile that transfers to your eyes as well.

Now, for more of a sexually charged vibe, not a mone though, would be copulins, but, I’d suggest you search the forum for posts on it to get more info on their application.

I would suggest IS/b and IShine. For a LT relationship vibe, I would also add IH. Bear your soul vibe with this one!

Now, Start up your vibe and tell us how the transformation is going!

You’ll be that flying beauty of a butterfly soon enough… :wink:

1Alpha

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3

You seem like a goal-oriented, high-status woman who’s done the career thing and hasn’t taken a great deal of time to pursue relationships :smiley:

But…marriage?! It sounds like what you’re really looking for a rotation of sex pets! :smiley: Also you listed a bunch of 10/10’s as your type :smiley: Heart slam, face tingle? Oh boy, girlie…

Not trying to yank your chain, just trying to share my perspective…just for contrast, I’m looking to put a ring on a good friend who I can do day to day things with and enjoy myself. And yeah, get hot and freaky occasionally. But come on, 99% of marriage more involves working around schedules, doing household chores, dealing with the antics of children, managing finances, going to bed in time for work, etc. Same as usual life, but with a committed partner.

Basically a good marriage starts with partners who aren’t constantly hot and bothered so they can relax and live normally without needing a constant flaming jets testosterone and estrogen to keep the hot mess from falling apart :smiley: That is why passionate relationships burn out so quick…once you move in and start living the boring day to day stuff together, you can’t keep up the same game. It falls apart, or it escalates into insanity and mental breakdown.

I think you got one part right tho: a laid back and accepting dude. Hopefully someone that makes you melt after that whirlwind of activity once you get home. Some one who makes you feel like you’re home right?

But can you surrender control and let that laid back man energy create another balanced other-half of your life that will help you zoom out, relax, and see the big picture? Well, I suppose the right guy would have that effect on you, and maybe THAT subtle cue is what you should be looking for :wink:

4

Welcome Bomb,

This is a super informal and not so tailored response if you will.

I would luuuuuuuv to spend more time assisting you especially since you are a newbie.

We are short staffed and these gift certificates are done manually.

It takes a great deal and I am back logged.

I am hoping that when I catch up on my work, I can start answering these intro threads the way I use to

In fact, I am hoping that soon, someone more experienced than me can come in so I get to do what I am great at, customer service.

Thank you for giving pheromones a chance.

Your gc was issued!

5

Thanks so much for the details on what I should buy.

I’m so stoked to report that out of nowhere my favorite man on earth has come back from overseas deployment earlier than expected. He was very hesitant to start an int’l relationship while he was away but has asked to see me and ‘catch up’ first week of September.

My heart is slamming out of my chest just thinking about this. Definitely want to have the 'mones in full effect!

No matter what happens with this particular bloke, I’m on this transformation journey to feel better, stronger and sexier in my own skin and to find the right person…whoever that may be.

Thanks much for the input and the support. I will for sure stay in touch on the forums.