Hello everyone,
I am healthy and active and would be so happy if I could get just a little more interest in sex. I have a committed, affectionate sweetheart and we are both feeling the downside of our age. Our minds “want” our bodies to play but our bodies don’t seem to care though he is having better luck than I. I use BHRT and have discussed this with my Doctor, NP and Pharmacist. I do realize that our womanly sexuality is more complicated. I am not expecting anything amazing, I am just hoping that pheromones will will be a “help” in the right direction. I look forward to hearing from everyone. I am in L.A.
Les
Hi Les, welcome to the forum!
Pheromones will help influence others’ perceptions of you, not necessarily help with arousal. Though Turn Up The Heat (a mens product) if worn by a man of your choosing, should definitely help.
BHRT should definitely help as well. I’m not menopausal yet, but started on that just to be a step ahead. Try increasing your testosterone cream (if yu have that). My doctor accidentally prescribed me a full scoop instead of a half scoop, and after a couple months of a full scoop daily, I was ready to become the town slut, lol. (I managed to restrain myself).
Would you mind sharing some info about your personality and the kinds of situations you would like to improve or change (besides your sex drive) with pheros? This will help us make the best recommendations, and also get you qualified for the $25 gift certificate.
Hi, Les! Welcome! 
If it helps any, you aren’t alone here. I’m in surgical menopause (long story) & my dr. will NOT put me on HRT at ALL. In addition I have a huge ugly belly scar & big belly folds where the removal of a mammoth growth caused the abdominal wall to kinda slump, so I have, er, “body issues.” :o
Sillykitty is right; PHEROmones are not HORmones. They don’t do the same thing. That being said, if the hormones are the “meat” (NO DIRTY JOKES HERE Y’ALL! 
) then the pheromones are definitely the spice. Think good BBQ with some delish secret recipe sauce.
Talk to us. Tell us what your goals are and we’ll try to help. Some have been here awhile, some of us not so long, but we’re enthusiastic and helpful. 
Hello Les
Welcome to Pherotalk
Sweetie 55 is the new 40 . Your not alone though and although pheromones wont solve the problem they can be one tool in your arsenal that you can use along with other methods to rev things up again.
Now you mention your mind wants to but your body is disagreeing with it. You can PM me with the answer to this if you feel better or just say none of your business if you want but how exactly is your body expressing this protest. Is it you just dont feel like having sex or is it something more physical like lubrication ?
The reason I ask is while pheromones are not a cure for anything some of them have certain effects we have noticed that may help with certain specific issues.
I do suggest starting with the basics like Instant sexiness to give you a sexy soft womanly vibe which many times the wearer feels as well as those exposed.
TUTH as SK suggested. This is a men’s product and you can wear a few dabs or 1/2 a spray to increase you own arousal and his aggressiveness of he can wear it. He would use a bit more though.
Ishine I suggest for everyone. Its a must have in your mone arsenal. Warm energizing magnetic …it just makes you feel good and youthful.
I also strongly suggest you look into copulins. These are not sold here but its a staple in all phero womens arsenals. You can buy them at Love Scent and we can teach you to use them if you like. Just a short intro to cops, These are synthetic vaginal fluids of young fertile women. They arouse men and they also make us feel sexy and sensual. As we age we make less and less copulins and it really effects our outlook on sex and our ability to arouse and attract men.
If you need help of have any questions just ask. I look forward to chatting with you in the forum.
Tisha
I can speak to Tisha’s expertise. She’s never guided me wrong yet. The Instant Shine is great stuff! Haven’t tried TUTH yet, but probably will at some point (hubby doesn’t know about my mone experimentation yet). Instant Sexiness results in a good feminine feel (both to you and to the people around you), and Instant Shine is like, “I’m ready for my close-up, Mr. DeMille!” LOL
I also use Instant Honesty, but that’s more for when I’m out either with friends, or selling the books that I write at a convention. It isn’t a bedroom mone, as it were. P83 seems to add a nice flirtiness to my interactions with my husband.
You can also look for naturopathic support. I have a friend who had surgical menopause inflicted on her and she went naturopathically. Great results with none (for her) of the common symptoms.
Things like yam cream, dong quai, black cohosh, vitex agnus castus, red clover.
I know she’s used some of the above and then went to a naturopath and got herself sorted out.
more about me
Good morning everyone,
I am surprised and pleased at the quick and personal responses. Thank you for your thoughtful effort. I hope to answer some of the questions and will be blunt to give you the most insight. Let me know if you have more.
I have a great NP and Pharmacist and they have been working with me, on this particular challenge, to try different combinations of Testosterone, Estriol (vaginally) and Progesterone compounded-creams, but, I have never returned to that sexy feeling. All I can say is, I have a great life in every area but sex, feeling sexy, arousal. It is just getting flat and flatter. I have good interaction with everyone whether it’s close friends or strangers at a store, and, actually attract younger male attention. (not as much as i used to) “I” just don’t have that “sexy” feel anymore.
My sweetheart and I can make-out, and it is great. I am sure something is released then because I do get that floating sensation in my head, but, touching myself is like touching my knee. Rarely do I get physical arousal and it’s a lot of work getting an orgasm. Sometimes, I just don’t want to bother. As he says, 'it’s like riding a bicycle uphill". He is slowing down, too, because of age but he is happy with me and still quite in touch with his sexuality and arousal.
There is no doubt in my mind that our pheromones and copulins are depleted. We don’t even have to use deoderant, anymore.
As I said in my original post, I am not expecting fireworks, but, it does sound like pheromones could be a supporting adjunct, an undertone.
I am anxious to hear what everyone says.
Good morning Sillykitty and all,
Thank you for your comments. I am new to responding to threads and hope I am doing it right.
I believe I have done my work with the BHRT and am stuck with what I’ve got.
I am a “pleaser” personality and very social. I like everyone to be happy, but, I have learned my limits. I am a care-giver, a helper, a true Aquarian.
There are no other areas of my life that I need help in. As I said in the original post, I am healthy and active. I don’t wear makeup and am mistaken for being 10 to 15 years younger than I am. My hair is long and gray for which I was a model. I really am satisfied in all areas except feeling sexy and arousal.
Let me know your thoughs.
Good morning Tisha,
Thanks for sharing all you know. I see you, too, are a helper. I am happy to share it all, here, for everyone’s benefit. As I said to Silly Kitty, people assume I am a lot younger and I am youthful, in every way except sexiness.
Menopause was a shock to me and, of course, there are exceptions. You think you are going to be the same the rest of your life, but, when those hormones go away, real changes happen. I don’t believe you can really comprehend this until it happens to you. You can intellectually empathize, but, like most of life’s big events (having a baby, being married, losing someone) you can’t really empathize till you’ve worn those shoes.
(I have something to say about hormones and mating but I will start another thread and keep this one to your specific questions).
Back to your question. I like my sweetheart and we are very affectionate with lot’s of hugs and kisses which can turn sexual, but, I don’t feel aroused. I suspect my body doesn’t lubricate anymore but I use that vaginal estriol. Though I am very causious about not letting him come in contact with the hormone, the carrier-cream is still in the vagina and acts as a lube. So, a lack of arousal seems to be the problem.
I will look into copulins asap and get back with you.
I am grateful for everyone here. Thank you for sharing your thoughts and experience.
Les
copulins
(I am new at writing in threads but starting to get it. I just changed the title).
I just looked at the Copulins over at Love Scent. Is there any special way to use their PCC? That was the only Copulin I saw. I am anxious to start here, with the IS. Would the PCC/Copulin be a good addition to start. I know that my situation is not rare and if I find a solution, there will be many that benefit from it. I am very willing to share my experiences with everyone.
Les
Boudicca,
Thank you for sharing your supplies and will ask you more details, later. I like the phrase “bedroom mone”. That sounds like a good "mone’ to me. LOL I think there must be some humor in there, too. LOL
Les
Oh yeah. I have a decidedly warped and inconvenient sense of humor sometimes.
Anyway, what I was intending to differentiate between was “social” mones and “sexy” or “sexual” mones. One greases the skids in relationships in general, the other will be more arousing to some degree. “Out in the world” vs “bedroom.” My tongue-firmly-in-cheek terms.
Oh, amen to THAT. I’ve been shocked and horrified at the changes, and I. DON’T. LIKE. IT. Not that I seem to have a choice, not even HRT at the moment. I’m sorry yours isn’t doing quite what you want it to, and I wish I could wave a wand and make it better. It sounds to me like the TUTH might help you, then. Like I said before, I haven’t tried it - yet - but I’ve read enough about it on the boards to believe Tish when she recommends it.
Les, the “real” copulins at Love Scent are called Essence of a Woman, so you may have seen it but not realized it was copulins. They are kind of stinky when first applied, but dry down nicely after 10 to 20 minutes, and can easily be covered by fragrance if you prefer.
As for the products here, they are all excellent, and have different purposes and effects. Instant Sexiness B will give you a sexy kittenish aura, men will want to please you more and be more protective of you.
Instant Shine will give both your mood and the moods of those around you a nice boost, you will have a happy glow that will draw others to you.
Instant Openness is good for encouraging conversation, it will relax you and those around you, people will be friendlier and chattier.
Instant Honesty will add depth and intimacy to conversations, others will feel more comfortable around you and tend to trust you more. IH is also great for creating and strengthening emotional bonds.
Just ordered…
Hey everyone,
I just got my gift certificate and ordered:
One of @ IS/A and TUTH…
I think I will lightly try one and see what happens and then, another day, try the other and see what happens. Then, I’ll report to you.
I can’t wait. This is so exciting.
I’m waiting to hear if you’ve got any suggestions.
Les
PCC works OK for the younger set because its so mild. I am in my 40’s so I get EOW which stands for Essence of Women. I need the Big guns LOL
Be prepared its kinds stinky but you cover it. Its been scientifically proven to raise men’s testosterone levels by 130 to 150% when exposed on a women. Its like the mating scent. I dont know about the rest of the ladies who use it but it makes me feel more sexy, feminine and mildly aroused when I use it despite the gag worthy scent.
Once you get going with the standard stuff and see how you like them I have some suggestions for putatives that may help as well.
Tisha
not IS “A”…I got IS"B"…whew
Correction:
I just re-read my post and saw that I put A instead of B…
I remembered watching something (it wasn’t Oprah this time) and the infamously famous Dr John Gray has extended his repertoire, hope this helps:
Some recent and very exciting scientific discoveries have proven that the differences between the sexes and how they relate to one another are biochemically based and can be explained by our hormones. “Venus on Fire, Mars on Ice” provides groundbreaking insight into:
? The Unique ways that each gender deals with stress
? How the stress hormones harm our health and complicate our ability to relate to one another
? The important role of ?superfoods? and good nutrition in replenishing hormones
? How balancing our blood sugar is intricately connected to balancing our hormones
? How achieving hormonal balance will not only improve our relationships but give us the strength and energy to cope with the challenges of our modern lifestyles.
? Why menopause ?and ?man-o-pause? don’t have to be the relationship stressors they currently are
In “Venus on Fire, Mars on Ice,” John Gray shares essential elements of wellness, happiness and lasting passion while revealing the keys to natural health and restoring vitality.
http://www.marsvenus.com/xcart/product.php?productid=190&cat=4&page=1
Oooo, Astrea, I’ll have to check this one out too! I just finished a book about “Why You Get Fat” and adjusted my diet appropriately. We shall see how it goes, but I am feeling better because of it. Maybe this one will be just what I need to polish the system, as it were. Thanks!
I know, huh? Makes sense, because when you look at the cultural data:
Asian women don’t suffer this kind of symptomology. Neither do (dot) Indians and notoriously - those countries that don’t have access / or interest in the highly processed food and drinks that the west does. My great grandmother didn’t do menopause until 67 (so I’m told) she died at 79 and had none of the drama we associate with it.
My grandmother didn’t do menopause until the same age and had only mild (apparently) symptoms - but she was a sugar addict.
I have also seen a water presentation that shows the bottled water - I’m gonna name a couple sorry if they get deleted; Dasani and Aquafina are as high on the acid scale as they can be. This is useless for hydration and health. The best bottled water on the pH scale is spring waters. Evian showed neutral on the pH scale.
Meaning: high acid water is not going to be absorbed easily by the body (this is just for those who are not scientists; I’m not patronising anyone) and this is what makes you slosh and bloat.
Properly ionised water is best; but if you can’t, do the spring waters.
It’s all gotta help, right? Oooh, before I forget! The point of the John Grey book was this premise: You’re body is still your body - there is no use by date at the cellular level; so what keeps everything functioning?
Food. Why HRT? Because it’s easy and doctors are not necessarily concerned with your diet - unless your health is at risk because of it.
His words not mine.
Hope it helps. If it does - let me know, eventually I’m gonna need that information. 
Wilco! You know, what sucks is that my mom had to have a hysterectomy at an early age and got thrown into surgical menopause too - but her doctor gave her HRT long enough to ease her into it.
But my GRANDMOTHER was way older’n me before she hit menopause. Which supports your info.
And here I am slogging my way through all this stuff and the doctors wouldn’t give me HRT even when I asked. Tisha recommended a site the other day and it had an online quiz I took - you know you’re a mess when the dang thing registers that you have SEVERE symptoms. (And it’s all caps.) I’m trying an herbal/nutritional supplement, which (along with changing my eating habits, exercising, drinking filtered lemon water <natural electrolyte replacement>, massage therapy to work out the pain, and some stuff like that) seems to be helping. Whether it’s enough, I don’t know yet. If it isn’t, I’m going to my GP and asking for bio-identical HRT.