Remember high school? Or around that time? Remember how you might get embarrassed by your parents? Or your friends? Well you think that passes and once you go off in the world and become an adult, those days are gone.
True, in my case the rampant summertime tradition of public humiliation by a friend sneaking up behind you to pull your shorts to your ankles mercifully passed. But the embarrassment of the parents? Yeah.
I think that is longer lasting. In some cases, it gets creepy over time. Like when I brought home my first serious post-college GF and mom tried to bond with her talking about her sex life. Awkward!
One of my absolute most embarrassing moments actually happened over the phone. I was moving from one apartment to my first condo and I had short period where I was out of the apartment and not yet able to move in to the condo.
All the big stuff was with the movers and the boxes were in the parents garage for two weeks. Now one of the sisters or my mother wanted something and I directed them to a particular box. It turned out, I had been mistaken as to which box it was they needed and three of them were now opening box after box.
A short time later, my sisters call me back laughing hysterically. It appears that my girlfriends vibrator made it into one of the boxes and good ol’ mom found it. According to my sisters, she didn’t know what it was and yet was able to turn it on, throwing them into further convulsions of laughter.
My GF didn’t make it to Thanksgiving that year. Wonder why?
I can see it now…“Well, hello Mrs. McGillicutty. What is that? Um…ooo…that’s just my deep muscle massager.” Mrs. McGillicutty > “Isn’t that nice, dear. Look! It has three speeds!”
Bella - spot on. Oh and as for scars for life, it just one more.
I was on the phone as this was happening, so you can imagine the commentary happening as I am turning every shade of red despite being 90 miles away!
My sister on the phone with me : “now she’s waving it around!” (uncontrolable laughter by both sisters)
The poor vibrator. It’s pleasure making days had passed. GF wanted nothing to do with it again and bought a new one. It was forever tainted and she said to dispose of it. I think she was even more scarred.
It’s funnier now, but nothing I’ll ever discuss while home for a holiday.
I got home late after work, around 2am. Was pretty tired as I worked 17 and a half hours that day, but my girl texted me so I didn’t go to sleep quite yet.
Heres how the conversation went.
Her: Hey Bob!
Me: Hey babe, been busy at work sorry about that.
Her: It’s ok, I know you work hard
Me: I play hard too babe.
Her: Hehe well I wish you were here then we could ‘play’
Me: Sounds good, but im so tired I’d fall asleep on the way there most likely. (side note, yes I just turned down sex)
Her: Aww…well…why dont you tell me what you would do if you were here Suddenly Captain Nemo wakes up and I get a sudden energy boost
Me: Okay, I think we can do that.
So, things kinda heat up a little bit and I get into it, so does she. Midway through she stops replying to my messages. About 15 minutes later I get a message.
“This is *****'s mother. Go away from my daughter. Now.”
Maybe you should just jump in there with both feet and act like the embarassment doesn’t bother you. It can really free things up.
I have always had a great relationship with my mother in law, but when I first married her son, she was uptight about a lot of things, sex especially. Now we talk about anything, and she finds all sorts of things funny and interesting that before she wouldn’t even talk about. I had to go out on a limb to find this other side of her personality.
For St. Patrick’s Day I got her a shirt that says, ‘Kiss me, I’m magically delicious.’
She wore it to the senior center for lunch.
What is that? Um…ooo…that’s just my deep muscle massager.” Mrs. McGillicutty > “Isn’t that nice, dear. Look! It has three speeds!”
