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Field Reports & Anecdotal Experience Men's Journals
221

Alllrighty. I’m gonna start this off by saying: I’m really starting to like p83. I makes me so impulsive, I wanna just do whatever comes to mind. I love it. It reminds me of when I was a middle school kid, walking around with a chip on my shoulder, ready and willing to do anything for some excitement. Boy has that lead to some stupid, stupid ideas. :stuck_out_tongue:

But seriously, I’m loving p83, and between p79 and p83, I’ve got all the ‘drive’ pheromones I need. I don’t find that p83 is inherently sexual, though the ‘tension’ could be interpreted as such.

Okay, so before I forget, here’s what I wore:
1 drop A314, 2 sprays IS2.1, 2 sprays IS2x, 2.5 sprays IH4x, 15mcgs TAF, and 12.5mcgs p83 I threw on the p83 after a couple hours later when we were headed to party.

The base combo of A314, IS/IS2.1, IH, and TAF was good. It wasn’t a spectacularly fun night or anything, just a solid combo.

I’d say the combo got me a lot of social proofing (is that the proper term? I don’t even know these days..) when a girl came by to smoke with us. It was a girl that I’d met before, but I thought her name was something very similar. I thought it was a different girl anyways, as she was all dressed up last night and she was far from dressed up when I had first briefly met her. I don’t know if she recognized me or not. I think she might have, but I think she was a little confused too.

Anyways, she introduces herself to me and we seem to click. Eh, I dunno if click is the right term. Either way, she was throwing out a lot of IOIs my way. They weren’t blatant, but there was a clear difference in the way she reacted/acted towards me and the other guys in the room.

I can’t say how many high-fives she threw up at me, but during the brief time she was there she basically seemed to like me, then like me more, then even more as time went on. She literally exclaimed, Hey! I’m liking this guy more and more! a couple times, accentuated with high-fives. I dunno, we had a lot in common I guess. :slight_smile:

She was also very eager to point out her unique stuff, or somehow strike up a conversation with me. I wouldn’t say it was to the point where she was opening me up or anything like that, at least as far as vibes go, she just really seemed legitimately interested.

I don’t think it’s gonna go anywhere but she’s one chill girl.

Okay so fast forward with the p83 now.

We go out, hit up one place, it’s whack but free drinks aren’t bad. There’s frat party nearby and apparently one of us knows a guy, who knows a guy…basically we don’t know anyone. We get to the front door and none of the guys wanna lead. So I assume it’s up to me and just walk right in like I own the place (now..is this why I’m getting into trouble with frat boys..hmm :stuck_out_tongue:) and no one says a thing. Eventually we make our way to the back where the dancing is going on, look at each other like ‘Hey, I guess we’re in, time for some fun.’

Well, it would have been fun, but the quality of the girls really wasn’t up there that night. But it would have been a shame if we risked an ass-whoopin and didn’t even have a little fun. So I popped in there for a bit of casual dancing with one of the few cute girls there. I went to talk to her later, but she just engrossed herself in her phone in a really lame attempt to get rid of me. I wasn’t that interested in her, but I wasn’t gonna stand around. Eventually she said, you don’t have to stand here with me, you can go dance if you want. I told her, Huh? Well, I was just tryna make conversation but hey, it was nice meeting you. Bye. I noticed my friends leaving just a bit earlier so I just left with them. We went to Denny’s and grubbed so hard.

The only other notable thing was that my friend’s gf was along and she seemed to relax a lot around me as the night went on. Then again, there was a lot more interaction than usual between us that night. I dunno, not much to say really. She definitely took notice of the chill girl’s interest and the dancing in the frat house, because her behavior changed when she saw our interaction and she mentioned the dancing when we were leaving.

It was a decent night.

222

Hey Phya, great report. You should get to know chill girl better and start bringing her along when you go out partying. Sounds like she could be a lot of fun and it’s great social proofing. Get her to high 5 you a couple of times in a club, and you’re good as gold.

223

Thanks Mark, I didn’t have a chance to secure any contact, didn’t really try honestly. She hangs with another social circle that shares some people with mine. I’m sure I’ll see her around sometime, though I guarantee it’s not going to be at a club.

So I’m sitting around bored, my sleeping cycle is fucked from my staying up till 5 am on and off this week. I don’t know what it is, but this behavior seems to roll around every couple months or something. I hate it, it bugs the shit outta me, but what the hell, it’s probably just the down part of some cycle that I don’t understand and that just means things will get better from here. I need a beer to kill this cycle tonight. I’ve got shit to do tomorrow.

Anyways, since my mind’s running, I decided I’d just look back at old journal reports for some ideas. Instead, TAF clicked really hard for me. I don’t fully get it, but I get some part of it I didn’t before. The pan-focus thing is cool and all, but the main reason TAF is awesome because there is this tension with TAF. Sexual tension maybe? It’s not anxious, but definitely on the jittery side. Like wanting to remove a hot piece of clothing. You really, really want to, but you can’t. That’s TAF.

I’m not sure if these could be interpreted as IOIs, but I realize now that I see way more IOIs with TAF than I do without.

Yesterday I wore 10mcgs of TAK with 45 mcgs of TAF. The only really standout thing I saw was that the girl sitting next to me in history was playing with her hair often and bumped my arm more than 5 times during class. They weren’t quick ‘Ow I touched a hot stove’ touch. It was a relaxed contact for a brief second or two, then breaking contact. I noticed for the most part, she was leaning away from me, so I really wonder how she accidently brushed me in the manner that she did. Though, I was really wondering what the hell she was doing in a left handed seat writing right handed.

Anyways, looking back I’ve noticed that with TAF there seems to be an overabundance of IOIs.

I’ve got a lot of combinations I want to try out now.

TAF and mx200.
p83 with a lot of things. :stuck_out_tongue: IS, Ammo, p79 and p74

224

So I very unexpectedly went out last night. I didn’t have much time to get ready so I just threw on some A314 and mx200.

I don’t really have too much to say, there weren’t great hits or anything, nothing really interesting to write about. I saw A and B there, A was happy to see me, but I kinda ignored her at first to say hi to everyone else I knew there, not to mention the damn bday boy. It was kinda awkward as she was trying to get this guy off her, but didn’t want to cause a scene I guess. As he approached, she quickly whispered to me, ‘Don’t help! Don’t help!’ Needless to say, I didn’t even see that situation coming so I was thoroughly confused. I wasn’t sure if she had said Help! Help, or Don’t help. In any event, she didn’t look like she was looking for help so I trusted my ears and just stood there and watched.

It felt like I was watching the scene in a movie where the town drunk accosts the pretty young lady and the whole town just watches. Nothing bad happened and I understood the need for discretion. That guy and I have many mutual friends in common and there’s no need to put my friends in the middle like that.

People who can’t control themselves shouldn’t be drinking. I’m getting really sick of these lame ass excuses for their behavior – Oh he’s just too drunk. Sorry, I was just too high. I drink, I smoke, and I can fucking control myself. I’m just gonna leave it at that.

Today I wore TAK, TAF, and IS2.1

I don’t have much to comment on except TAK. I feel like a broken record but slowly and surely I’ve been wrapping my mind around TAK. Yes, I still imagine the wet paper towel. :stuck_out_tongue:

But I think there’s no better way to put it than how tacitus already has: TAK is not about attracting, but about a reduction in resistance. If normal interactions are like moving through water, TAK interactions are like moving through air.

Unfortunately there seems to be a very fine balance for going overboard. Too much and you get that weird..disassociated feeling. Like time stops and the world gets quiet. You’re standing there just watching the events unfold around you.

Maybe I’m just a fucking disassociative addict? I mean..I do, do drugs. :stuck_out_tongue:

Anyways, that’s off track. I can’t describe blatant hits or anything with TAK. But it definitely adds a certain…ease to the interaction. Like sitting in a leather chair over a straw chair. It’s just smoother, fluid, like a bowl of olive oil.

TAK, like TAF, is best used in combos, IMO. It’s a tough one to figure out on its own though. With other products, the TAK’s effects might be overshadowed by the other product’s effects. So it’s hard to distinguish, but over time with repetitive usage, you can see it quite clearly.

If anyone decides to try and learn about TAK for themselves, I would recommend it at a 2.5mu/spray concentration.

225

Ran into chill girl again. Called it. :slight_smile: We’ll call her…J. She just happened to roll through my friend’s place. I can’t remember what I was wearing but it was a strictly social mix. I think it had IH, p74, and IS. Maybe some other stuff…but that’s what I’d start a social mix with.

Things were chill as usual. She was happy to see me, I didn’t go in a for a hug immediately and she just stuck her arm out and said “I think we’re close enough to hug now.” I had no problems with that.

We were talking about thanksgiving and she lives up north too. She let me know there was an open space in her car if I wanted one. Hey why not? Meet some new people and have a fun ride up. A plane is more convenient but lame compared to this. So I told her I was down. Got her number and that’s that.

Later we went to a pool hall, played pool, took some shots. I put my ID down for the deposit, but the owner only wanted DLs. Smiling, I asked him what the difference was, my ID has all the same information. He said people wouldn’t drive away without their license. Bad logic if you ask me, people can just ‘lose’ an ID like a DL. I’m sure most people can make a short drive home.

Anyways, J laughs and lightly shoves me saying “It’s not a big deal, I’ll just put mine down.” We start playing pool and it’s a fun, relaxed vibe. Close friends, just kicking back, bullshittin and playing pool. :smiley: I go to get a bottle of water and the owner asks me if she’s my girl. I smile and tell him no. We chit chat for a bit longer and then I’m off, he’s a funny guy.

Oh yea, somewhere in there she invites us to her bday this wednesday. That should be fun.

I also kicked it with her briefly today, just a shot of IH2x TOGO. No real details to talk about, but she was happy to see me again. I’m actually starting to kinda like her, maybe I’m just looking for a little peace right now, but I’m really digging her vibe. Seems very laid back and relaxed. Not all nervous and tense like some of these LA girls.

We’ll see where things go this wednesday.

226

Totally forgot to post what I originally intended to post. My mind is clearly elsewhere..

I wanted to get a better handle on IFM so I decided to wear 3 sprays today.

I think I’m beginning to see how IFM works. My discussion was canceled today and as I walked out the building I saw a girl in my discussion who I had small talked with before. I spoke across the courtyard that the discussion was canceled. She was a bit in disbelief with a ‘No Way!’ expression on her face. I let her know what the note said and we just started walking away together. Didn’t really talk too much about anything, but I thought it was interesting how…casually we started walking together. Like she wanted to walk with me, or considered me close enough to walk along with. We just walked and talked for a little bit, I wanted to get some work done in the extra time I had so I told her I was going to the library. We didn’t really say bye or anything, we just parted ways. I don’t know if she assumed I was walking to the dorms too or what, but I get the feeling that the parting was abrupt.

Later on in the day, I’m in the library again and as I get up to get some books, I notice a familiar face look up at me from the other side. It was a cashier that I saw often during lunch. I just said hey a couple times and chatted about whatever with her while paying for my food. Anyways, she had told me she was quitting soon (I interpreted that as a hint that my window might be narrowing.) and she had indeed quit. I hadn’t seen her since.

It turns out today was her last day. I said ‘You must be pretty happy.’ She replied ‘Yea, don’t you see the smile on my face?’ Sure enough, she was grinning ear to ear. Then she asked me what my name was. I introduced myself and got her name as well.

She noticed I looked really tired and I said yea, I just need to get some work done and it’s been tiring. And that was the truth, so I had to excuse myself and go get work done. On one hand I’m disappointed I let that chance get away, even if she’s not the most amazing girl in the world, but at the same time, I don’t really feel like I gotta take every opening. So whatever, if I run into her on campus again, cool, otherwise, whatever.

Anyways, the point relative to IFM is that it really does seem to just open up girls, not in the talkative sense, but in the emotional sense…and there’s definitely a ‘comforting’ presence, but not in the sense of IH. I think I’m beginning to see it.

Tomorrow isn’t the best day for trials as I usually just try and get in and out of lab quickly, but there’s an Immortal Technique show tomorrow night and that might be a good place to try a simple combo.

227

Okay, two reports.

The first is IFM solo. 4 sprays to my throat.

I woke up early to take care of some administrative stuff with the school. I go up to the office and see a girl that I am acquaintances with, but never talk to too much.

Today she seemed interested in conversation. It was very light and easy, I didn’t feel like I was prying for conversation. She seemed to enjoy our interaction, in fact, one of the girls sitting next to her jumped into the conversation, asking why I was taking a basic math class so late. My business was done ahead of time, so I said bye and went to talk to my TA.

She was also very upbeat for having been sick earlier in the week. She seemed to like my thesis as it was very different compared to the plethora of essays on the rise and fall of the Roman empire. Anyways, she was pretty helpful and cleared up a lot of questions for me. I wouldn’t say there was a dramatic change in behavior as she is normally very helpful, but the IFM quality was there.

Later, I went to get an early lunch. I talked with the cashier a bit. When she handed me the receipt stub to sign, she handed me a pen with a fake flower on the end of it. She was saying, sorry you have to use the flower pen. It’s so no one take our pens. I joked that maybe I should take it, I’d get a lot of attention in class – miming being in class and writing down notes furiously, the flower flapping around. She got a kick outta that.

Later, in class, there was a girl sitting a seat away from me. I had some notes to copy before class, so I started on that. As I did, I noticed she pulled out some fruit loop snack thing. Then a little while later, I notice her pull out a soda out of her backpack. I remark, Damn, you’ve got all sorts of snacks! She turns and laughs, explaining that she’s got a long day and doesn’t have time to eat. We talk for a brief moment, but the class started and the professor is difficult enough to understand without talking in the background so I just focused on class. Later I casually asked if she was close to done with her day. We mutually complained about how many more classes we had that day and went our ways.

And that ends the day with IFM. No crazy hits, I don’t think that’s what IFM really is geared for anyways. There is little doubt in my mind that IFM really does put women at ease, and not just during that time of month. I believe that IFM is a useful product for all times of the month, women just seem to open up to me. I don’t know if it’s putting them at ease, me sending a signal that says ‘Chill, I’m all good.’ or what. Either way, there seems to be less resistance to me just talking a girl up. Usually there is an obvious defensive reaction.

Either that, or my openings are getting better. :stuck_out_tongue:

Okay, so the second part of the night isn’t really as interesting.

I was wearing a large mix in a long time. A314, p74, mx100, IH4x, IS2.1, IFM, TAH, and TAL.

As a mix, it was well balanced. It didn’t feel out of sorts in any direction. The environment wasn’t the best. I put that mix together thinking we were going to go clubbing. What I was met with was a whole bunch of couples at a restaurant. These guys were extremely protective of their women. With the exception of a couple girls that were close to the birthday girl, I didn’t really talk to the majority of the people there. These people really didn’t feel like meeting new people I guess.

What I found most interesting, and I think this is the TAH and TAL coming out again, is that the couples that were around me were kinda fussy. Meaning, the girls appeared to be getting smothered by the protectiveness of their guys. I distinctly remember both the girl in front of me telling her guy that he’s getting too cocky, and the bday girl telling her guy that he just fucked up and that she’s kinda mad at him.

Lol, sorry guys. I didn’t mean to make it rough for yall, but you need to act more proper than that anyways, otherwise you wouldn’t be getting those reactions.

I’m not the kind of guy to try and cut into relationships, no matter if it’s one week, or one year. I’ll be friendly, but I deliberately act like I’m kinda uninterested to avoid unnecessary tension. Anyways, there was clear interest, but unfortunately I couldn’t follow up on it.

The people that I did converse with seemed to enjoy my company. We were all at a new restaurant and no one knew what dishes they did well. I joked that they probably do coconuts the best as the name of the place was Coconut Bay. The liked that. Later in the night, the girl in front of me had ordered a pina colada in a coconut. I saw that and joked again, ‘I think you took my suggestion a bit too literally.’

A good social mix, I commanded attention if I wanted it, and though there was definitely some tension with the guys, the girls seemed to enjoy my company, even if I had to limit myself.

Later we took it back to an apartment and drank some more. I seemed to make a big impression on some of the newer guests. Yet another couple came through and by the end of the night, the girl was exclaiming ‘This guy should be famous! Do you know that?’ :smiley: The guy was equally full of praise, and apparently, Koreans have a pretty bad image. I don’t know what it is, but recently I’ve been getting a lot of those comments.

I think I need to find those ESL students and get them to expand their horizons a bit..it’s making me work uphill. :stuck_out_tongue: Those Korean ‘gangstas’ in LA don’t really help either for that matter…

Anyways, the night didn’t turn out how I expected it to, but it wasn’t a bad night either.

I’m happy that I’ve more or less figured out IFM, I think I’m going to start making some simple combos with IFM.

I forgot to add, there was significant kino from one of the girls at the apartment. But maybe she was just really off balance?? I dunno, I didn’t respond to it because of the aforementioned couples thing. Although, I kinda got the feeling that this particular couple wasn’t even quite an item yet, but just in the beginning stages.

Dammit, I forgot another interesting detail. One of the guys, who I assume isn’t too close to the bday girl, J, said ‘You guys must have known each other for a long time.’ To which we laughed and she said, ‘Nah, we only met like..3 days ago.’ I don’t know how that kind of impression comes about, but the impression of rapport must have been formed fairly quickly if to an acquaintance thinks we’re that close.

228

So, from the earlier report, I mentioned that I thought the bday girl and some of the other girls were attached. That’s not actually so. The girl who I thought might have been really off balance, she’s been touching me even more lately. Either that or she just really likes to get into people’s personal space..

Oh, before I forget, I was wearing a very simple combo. I didn’t expect last night to be a big deal. I wore IH4x, IS2.1, TAK, TAF, and p74.

Maybe the combination between TAK and IS, but I felt kinda awkward in the early stages of the night. Anyways, I don’t really remember too many outright hits, just the usual good social acceptance that goes with a standard social combo.

The only hit I’d say is an Asian girl came up behind me and pressed her body against mine. I looked back to see who it was and upon seeing her, I said hi. Then she went around my back to my other side, and pressed herself against me again. I didn’t pay any attention, I wasn’t into her.

This is sort of a side note, but never underestimate the value of a smile and eye contact from across the room. I wasn’t planning on it, but I happened to look at a girl and she looked up at me from across the room. I just smiled at her and she smiled back, blushing a bit and turning away. That was practically an invitation. Some other guy started talking to her, I walked past her and to the balcony. A few seconds later, she stopped talking to the guy and went to the center of the dancefloor. In order for me to walk back out, I had to squeeze past her. Those are the small details to notice when a girl is giving you an invitation to talk to her.

Anyways, I noticed two Asian girls at the party and they happened to arrive at the same after party I went to. I immediately jumped on the chance. They came into the garage while we were setting up for beer pong. I walked over and simply introduced myself, asking their names. I found out that they are foreign exchange students from Japan. We’ll name them I and S. I wasn’t into I, but I was definitely into S.

I talked with them for a bit until my partner called me for my game. During the game, I noticed them taking pictures of me and my friend, I said ‘hey, we weren’t even looking at the camera!’ They look back and take another picture while we pose. I also noticed my friend try to make moves, I don’t know what his approach was, but I noticed her legs had shifted into a defensive posture when it was previously opened while I was sitting there talking with her. Hmm..guess she’s a little picky.

Anyways, the game’s going on, and I just do little things to keep S involved. Also, her responses tell me that she’s feelin me. Like, there’s music playing, and I’m just dancing, I look at her, and she starts dancing too.

They left during the middle of the game, and I thought they left so I was kinda annoyed. Turns out they hadn’t. I jump on it right away again. I had to twiddle my thumbs for a bit while they were in the bathroom. When I saw S later, she said she was looking for I, I let her on her way and happened to find I first. I engaged her in some small talk and S showed up. I redirected my conversation to S and I just slipped away. I talked with her for a bit longer and then wrapped it up and asked for her number. She gave it to me and stuck around for a little while longer. When they were leaving I hugged her goodbye.

The rest of the night was just chilling with J and K, both of whom treated me a little differently. I guess watching me talk to that Japanese girl did something for them. :stuck_out_tongue: Okay, gotta turn the cocky down.

Now I’m just wondering how I should go about this…today’s saturday. I leave wednesday night for thanksgiving, so that leaves monday night or tuesday night to plan something with S. I don’t want to wait until after thanksgiving break because that’d be way over a week, but maybe it’s better that way?

I’m thinking at least a small little meet up to solidify the connection, otherwise it could easily fade into nothing.

I dunno, maybe someone can chime in and help me out.

229

So I’ve been playing around with IFM more. It really deserves more attention..seriously.

I wore 1 drop of A314, 3 sprays of IFM.

If I had to describe this combo, I’d put it down as: girls feel comfortable enough to approach you, and with the A314, you’re worth the risk.

Got to discussion a little early. As we walk into the empty classroom, I start talking with one of the girls. I don’t know her name, we never introduced ourselves (maybe due to the distancing of the A314, she didn’t try and get too familiar?) Either way, we were talking about the upcoming midterm. She was sending out plenty of IOIs. Started getting really giggly with her friend and did whatever they needed to, to draw attention to themselves. These two in particular liked played ‘Woe is me’. ‘I was up all night studying’ or ‘I’m so screwed, I don’t think I’ll do well’..that kinda stuff.

I just smiled at the cute whining and crammed for a different midterm coming up next.

On the way out, they were talking very loudly, in fact, they waited in the hallway for me to walk past them. I laughed cause they said something funny and they remarked ‘he’s listening to us’. I responded back ‘Yea, it’s hard not to when you guys are walking so close behind me.’ I can’t remember the rest of the conversation, honestly.

Killed the midterm and went to get some lunch. After getting my food, I run into some friends of J’s. We’ll say, M and S for now. Well, I’ve met M before and she’s definitely into me. Plenty of IOIs and I couldn’t ask for more prompt attention. We talk for a bit, she invites me to sit with them and I just bullshit with them for a while, while eating.

They go to class and right then, my friends show up. We study a bit more for this history midterm then just relax. Go take the test, kill that one too and I wait outside for my friend.

While I’m standing there, N from waay earlier, comes up to me and asks me how I think I did, etc..small talk. Let’s me know that her roommate’s having a bday thing sorta and that my friends and I should drop by. Her friend comes out and they leave.

I’m still waiting and the girl I was talking to in discussion walks out with a different girl from discussion. I guess the 3 of them are friends. Anyways, girl 1 starts the conversation, it mostly goes along the lines of ‘Oh, I did so bad..’ (Someone give me sympathy..)

The other girl is equally enthralled and the two of them are competing for my attention. I’m not really into either one of them, but it was better than standing around by myself. My friend comes out, and I break the conversation.

As we’re leaving I hear girl 1 kinda yell out, I still did horrible on the test. Either an attempt to regain my attention or gain someone else’s attention..I don’t know..

Either way, IFM really gets your foot in the door. I’m planning on building off of this. It would probably be very effective with some IS. Anymore pheromones and it will need some major tweaking..

Honestly, I think this combo would work better with Instant Gentleman.

230

~30 mu TAF, 2 IFM, a dab of p79.

Nothing to report except that I had to spend an hour trying to get into a required math class. I don’t know if the IFM helped, but all the workers were women. It couldn’t have hurt.

Anyways, this may have just been a good approach, but there was a girl in front of me. The line splits and she hadn’t picked a line yet. She was leaning on the left side, but then decided to go around the barrier to the right side, moving directly in front of me. I thought she was listening to her ipod, but she apparently wasn’t when I was standing next to her.

I noticed that she had a small keloid growing out of her tragus piercing. I asked her how her rook piercing was (I was completely wrong). She laughed and told me it was a tragus. I told her I used to have a conch piercing and she lit up at that. She was really excited about that. We talked about piercings for a bit, we were interrupted by the checkout. At that point I was thinking to myself, what should I do with this opening? Am I interested enough in her to try and secure later contact? I didn’t decide fast enough and just let it slide by basically. Before she left the counter, she asked my name and introduced herself. After introductions, she said I hope I see you around.

That’s it for today.

231

Some p103 stuff:

232

Okay, so I recently ordered a new bottle of IG and man, I should have had that all along for school.

I wore 1.5 IG, 1-2 IFM, 1 IS2x, 1 IH4x, 30mu TAF

Wonderful social combo. I didn’t think it’d work so smoothly, but it did.

I’m headed to a late study session and I’m running a bit late. I show up and there aren’t any seats at the table. I sit down in the open chair, but a couple minutes later, someone at the table leaves. I ask the guy next to me if he wants to sit at the desk. He declines and lets me take the seat. I catch up on whatever I missed, and a few minutes later, we have to change libraries.

During those few minutes, the vibe of the study group changed to a much more casual vibe. People started relaxing and being themselves. I believe the IFM played a large role in this for the girls and the IS helped for the guys.

I didn’t plan on taking control of the group, but it sorta just fell into my lap. We joked and chatted on our way to the library. We get there and we are still a small group at that point. We find our seats and get started. Slowly, more and more people show up until we need to rearrange the seating and split up into two groups. Originally, there were 3 other guys, and 5-6 girls. Of that original group, one would stereotypically be a ‘jock’, one would be a ‘nerd’, and the other would just be…‘effeminate’ (for lack of a better terms). The all of the original girls ended up in my group, with the exception of one pregnant black girl, and the ‘nerd’ and ‘effeminate’ ended up in my group, while the ‘jock’ went over to the newly formed group, however rather than taking charge, he opted to remain in the background – presumably to do as little work as possible, or maybe he was genuine and wanted to see what others had to say. I mention this because I felt that there was a subtle challenge for the alpha seat. Man..this would have been a lot easier to draw out than to type out. Anyways, if anything, it was a subtle change, not something that is too noticeable.

The study group is becoming more and more unorganized and chaotic. I think the IH played a part in this. People were more concerned about whether a topic would be on the test or not, and debating over it/complaining about it, rather than just studying. I definitely had to keep the group on track at multiple points throughout the night.

However, the group was very social, as shown by their lack of focus. The girls in my group seemed to enjoy all my jokes. I didn’t even really intend to make jokes, I was just being me. They were all contextual jokes, mostly one-liners/comments made after something happened. Either way, I controlled the pace of the study group. When I directed my efforts towards getting something done, they followed. When I relaxed for a moment to laugh, so did they.

Eventually, I ended up dictating my notes to another guy transcribing on a laptop. The ‘effeminate’ guy noticed the…‘attention’? ‘air time’? I dunno, but either way, he wanted in. I welcome any and all contributors, but it became annoying when I would dictate a series of events, then as I finish my last word, ‘effeminate’ skips in 'Hey, don’t forget, that event, so and so, repeating everything I just said and confusing the hell out of the guy on the laptop. Eventually, I ended up being a little sharp with him and either saying, ‘we’re past that’, or just ‘yeah…then what happened is..’ People definitely noticed it, but no one challenged my ‘authority’ so to speak.

Also, a couple people ended up dropping by, so social proof is also in effect here. One guy is just a friend, another friend who was also in the class but didn’t stick around, and a girl from class that was studying in another room. Either way, once the studying is done, it’s pure social time.

That’s where this combo shined. I think the fact that we all stressed over studying for the final together, and the resulting bonding played a factor socially, but the social vibe was definitely up a notch. I remarked at one point how we were probably waay too loud for a library study group. We had the door open, laughing and yelling for over 4 hours.

As far as effects on the women, the girl who organized the study group was giving me strong, strong eye contact. She would look to me first, then the rest of the group. The other girls in the group did the same, but seemed to be more cautious about it. If I had to designate an ‘alpha’ female, it would have been the girl who organized it all. But, honestly, she wasn’t a real ‘alpha’ female, just the most ‘alpha’ of the girls who were there. Perhaps the same could be said about my position that night. I’m not an ‘alpha male’ in the strict sense, but I was the most ‘alpha’ male in the room.

Anyways, there’s not much more to write upon, other than another small hit. I was at my friend’s place, just hanging out and some girls come through. One of them introduces herself immediately. Later, on our way out, she gives me a hug. I’ve never met her before. It wasn’t an OMGZZ! kinda hit, but it was a hit nonetheless…

I’m not really sure where I’m going with this one, other than Instant Gentleman is very nice for college. I think it’s going to be the base of many of my combos now.

233

2 IG
10 p79
15 p74
30 TAF
5 p83
1 IS2x

Hmm..okay so, what was the idea with this mix? A very masculine mix, not aggressive. Just laid back, composed, and chill.

I love IG + p79 and p74. IG on it’s own is great, but put p79 on top and it gets some teeth. The p74 lends a sense of hipness. I love the contrast between the smooth qualities of IG and p74 with the primal energy of p79. It’s like an Aston Martin or an AMG Mercedes. Classy, elegant, but underneath lies a beast. It’s not like a modded import, or a brash muscle car. It’s elegant, but has bite. You get the point.

The Shine was just polish, and the p83 was just there, not as a sexual element, but to give it a little more spice.

The TAF, not sure why I put 30mu.

So a couple of my friends are driving over to hang out. A couple of them get here first and I go to meet up with them. It’s J and one of her friends. We’re smoking and stuff, she’s throwing the usual IOIs, but the TAF made it that much more in your face. She drew attention to her hairstyle change. I didn’t notice how much shorter it was because her hoodie was hiding it. She just kinda stood up and shook her hair. I was like, damn, your hair is hella shorter. Looks nice. Did you dye it too? It’s more..purple. I was right on the money. That’s exactly what she did.

Her friend was respectful and perhaps a bit taken aback from my friendliness. (He’s a guy) He was friendly himself and seemed to warm up to me very quickly. We smoked, chilled, whatevers it was cool. We went to the club to pick up some more bud.

The doormen are usually friendly, but this guy was over the top. He might as well be a bellboy at the Ritz. Very polite, very courteous, and upbeat. Like: Hi! How are you today? Doing fine Mr Kim, thank you for asking. Please come inside. On my way out, he was just as chipper saying Have a good night Mr Kim! :slight_smile:

Inside, there was a woman in front of me, couldn’t have been older than 27. I didn’t know her or anything, there wasn’t anything in particular about her that struck me. The only thing was that for some reason, whenever I looked at her, she seemed to scream ‘Talk to ME!’ with her body language. So I did.

Now, initially, her legs were crossed away from me. I decided to ignore it because her facial expressions and everything else was saying go for it. I wasn’t interested in picking her up, but I figured, it’s a long line, I might as well practice my socializing skills.

I just started off asking about her favorite strains (which, btw, also gives you an idea of their economic background, something which I didn’t think about earlier, she clearly works a decent job as she was choosing the higher grade strains) and that led to some more chit chat about stuff in the room. Like how they’ve changed a lot, replacing the whiteboard with a projector, how other clubs have TV screens now, etc..really nothing of importance. I didn’t get into any personal details or anything, just talking about the common ground we clearly had.

At one point, I noticed she was going to ask a question or state something, but we started talking at the same time, and she gave me the mic, so I just kept talking. I wonder what she would have talked about, if only so I could know where this interaction had her headed.

A guy looks like he’s done and so she gets up to walk up to the counter when she realizes he’s not actually done. She’s kinda embarassed and smiles back at me and sits down. We joke about it for a moment, then her turn actually comes up and she goes up to the counter. When she’s leaving she turns and says bye.

I go up to the counter, deliberate over what the best value would be and make my purchase.

Fast forward, J and her friend had to leave, two of my other friends show up. We drive up to a chill spot and drink and smoke for a few hours. We were pretty much exclusively in the car for the first 3 hours so I think the pheros had a strong impact.

They are essentially fighting for my attention. They aren’t doing it outright, I wonder if either of them are even doing it consciously. I doubt it. I’ve noticed this behavior before back at school where we normally hang out, but never to this extent. I think the p83, IG, and p74 had to do with this. Not to mention the fact that I’m the host, and the fact that we’re in a car for most of the time. I feel the p83 made their reactions more spontaneous, and the p74 had the ‘cool’ effect. The IG brought a sense of ‘the big man’. Like, the one to talk to when you need something done.

They both had their own ways of demonstrating loyalty or support. One guy did it by making sure I had my share of stuff. Airtime, drinks, smoke, whatevers. The other did it by making things easier for me, turning on lights, checking for lost stuff, things like that. Almost like being the Godfather and these two guys were my associates. (Bella, please correct my mob lingo if I’ve got it twisted :stuck_out_tongue:)

The thing is that it was all subcurrent communication. Meaning, the surface communication was equal, but the subcurrent communication was weighed in my favor. Another factor might be the positioning of seats. I was in the drivers seat, one friend was in the passenger seat, and the other was in the rear passenger seat. Effectively splitting up their interactions (they can’t really face and talk to each other), while I have direct access to both passengers (being able to talk to both face to face).

Perhaps the dynamics would be different if I were in the back and my two friends were in the front?

Anyways, that’s what I’ve got. Overall, it’s a balanced mix. The guys are either generally nice, or simply respectful. With the women, I’d say younger girls are into it. It’s got a fairly young feel to it, youthful but traveled.

234

2 IG
10 p79
15 p74
1 IS2x

I decided to break the previous mix down to the basics. I removed the TAF and p83 just to nail down the ratio between IG/p79/74. Even without the TAF and p83, I got huge hits from one girl, it was hits non stop.

A girl had her house open and they were just chillin and drinking. My friend invites me over and when I arrive, he introduces me to the girl, L. She says we’ve already met before, but doesn’t know where and when. I’m like..uh..no, but go ahead and try to remember. :stuck_out_tongue: She disregards that and strokes my face gently. She exclaims, ‘You have such soft skin!’. I’m like huh? Uh, thanks. :slight_smile: Meanwhile she’s just kinda staring at me.

Anyway, we go inside and there’s a guy I haven’t seen in a long time. We celebrate for a bit and catch up on what’s happened. There were two other guys there, they weren’t very social and seemed kinda nervous when I was introduced to them. There was also a gay guy there, hard to say where he was coming from, but he’s not that flamboyant. Can’t say how this combo effected him.

At one point, L is telling a story and she’s trying to show what happened, but needs another person. I get volunteered for it and sat down on the couch. L’s telling the story and massages my shoulders then my head. I don’t know what the story’s about, but I’m just say things like ‘Ooh, that’s nice..I could get used to this.’ Might as well enjoy, right? :smiley:

We’re on the porch smoking and chatting. I don’t know what we were talking about, but L suddenly looks at me and says ‘You have beautiful bone structure.’ I’ve been told I have nice skin, but nice bone structure? That’s definitely a first. I’m a little thrown off, but I smile and say thanks. We end up needing more liquor, so I’m volunteered to make the run since I haven’t had any drinks yet. L ends up coming with me. We play the game, who else do we know in common? on the way to the liquor store and other random stuff. She also exclaimed that I had a nice car, just mentioning it because it’s part of the pattern. :stuck_out_tongue:

When we get to the store, I ask her if she’s got any cash. She doesn’t, but she has her card. The catch is that she’s not 21, but I am. To my surprise, she offers her card and pin..:open_mouth:..yeah. Yes, we know two people in common, but this is still the first time we’ve met. I walk in, buy the bottle with her card and we’re back at the house.

Cool, now I’m drinking quickly, tryna catch up. :slight_smile: And again, out of nowhere, L compliments my teeth. Apparently, I also have very nice teeth.
:smiley:<–See? I was really taken aback now. I mean, seriously, this is the 4 time tonight. It’s not ‘Oh, you have nice teeth.’ It’s ‘WOW, your teeth are SO nice!’ Like spotlight, center stage.

After some time though and my disinterest, L started getting frustrated, openly exclaiming that she’s sleeping alone tonight and hates it. Clearly she’s saying ‘Hey buddy! I’m feeling lonely and want a warm..uh body. wink wink’ Unfortunately for her, and myself in a way, I’m not into her like that. She’s not ugly or anything, but she’s just not for me. I know better than to try and sex for the sake of having sex with someone you’re not that into.

Eventually she passes out and we go home. Either way, those were some very strong hits.

The respect from guys wasn’t nearly as pronounced, but we weren’t in the small, sealed environment of my car. I think the base of the combo is pretty solid. It might pop out better with a very small dash of -none. Then I’ll need to adjust the ratio of TAF and p83 relative to the base combo.

235

Good reports so far :slight_smile: Keep it up buddy :slight_smile: You are getting hits all the way :slight_smile: Reps for your reports :slight_smile:

236

2 Instant Gentleman
20 p79
15 p74
1 IS2x

Friend’s bday, went out to a lounge/bar and met up with my friends. Without any -none, 20mu of p79 is nice, but I’d tone it down if paired with any -none. I’ll have to try it to be sure. Hmm..hits? I went to a booth with a few people in it, wondering if they’d be willing to switch tables since we had so many people. The guys were a little touchy, but as I was walking away one of the girls called out after me. I wasn’t sure if she was yelling for me at first because she was just saying ‘hey! hey!’. When I had walked back to my friends, she was still yelling and the guy I had just talked to was yelling too. I’m wondering what the hell is going on now so I walk back over. She thinks she knows me. We exchange a couple questions about where we might know each other. I had no clue, but hell might as well see if we had any friends in common. She did kinda look like a girl that I knew, but it’s hard to say. I thought she might have been from b-high since everyone at that bar usually is. Anyways, that’s an example of pheromones getting your foot in the door. I didn’t have to do anything for that one, doesn’t matter if I didn’t do anything with the opening, it’s still a good advantage.

Another girl that I’ve been friendly with before was there and we were catching up. We were there drinking alcohol, talking about how an extra hydrogen bonds to the water molecules, causing us to be dehydrated. I was cracking stupid nerd jokes, basically nerding out but she liked it and told me that turns her on. Lol. Then later we were talking biology and I made a not only lame, but technically incorrect joke. I didn’t care, she still thought it was funny and I’m past being called a dork.

Anyways, things are heating up when she puts a stop on it. She tells me she has a bf now and that she got into a fight with him, etc..but she didn’t brush off my arm. Then she said, she totally would, but can’t. I told her I understood, I wasn’t about to be involved in anything like that so I just removed my arm and changed the subject.

After which she started sitting even closer to me. There was plenty of room in the booth, but she was squeezing every part of her leg, thigh, hips and shoulders on me, topping it off by laying her head on mine. We just had a drunken chat for a while, watched my friend try to score with two different girls at the same time, then watch him strike out twice..ouch. It’s okay dude, you’ll get em next time..lol.

Oh, yeah. I was waiting to get a drink and there was hella people crowded around the bar. I weaved through the people not in line and got as close the the bar as possible. I asked a guy if he was in line and he told me he was. I apologized and told him I wasn’t sure who’s got drinks and who doesn’t. A second later, a group of people moved away from the bar leaving an open space. I see it, no one else is walking towards the bar so I figure why not? I walk over and take the space. A split second later, there’s a woman behind me sticking her arm around me to the bar. Not to be outdone, I lean forward and I wait for the waitress to look at me. When she does, I order the second we catch each others eyes. She takes it in stride and fills up my drinks for me. While I’m waiting, the guy I was just talking to taps me on the shoulder and says ‘Hey, how are you gonna go and order before me right after talking to me?’ Hmm..he did have a point, but bars are pretty much always a free for all. He didn’t take it personally. When it’s all settled, she combines my drinks with the customer before me, thinking we’re together. I clarify that we’re not on the same bill and I get my drinks. I guess the way I ordered, she just assumed I knew the person she was currently serving. A little assertiveness can go a long way. :slight_smile:

237

Man, 3 weeks? School starts and time just whizzes by. My schedule’s been kinda hectic this quarter, but things are good. I’m reaching new heights in my personal fitness, but mostly I’m proud of being able to stick to my goals day in and day out. That goes for school too.

I haven’t been wearing pheromones lately. It’s surprising to realize that unintentionally I took a 2 week break. Kinda makes me wonder if subconsciously, I’m working on improving my 90%
before throwing on pheromones again. Like training in high altitude for a competition, then coming back down into oxygen rich air and blasting away the competition. Okay, I’m on 3 hours of sleep here, I might be talking gibberish.

I tried p95 once a while back but it didn’t amount to much. I guess I’ll probably start testing out putatives again. Fridays are my best days to test since I’ve got classes back to back for the whole afternoon. Plenty of test subjects there. :smiley:

Okay, well I’ve got a lot to catch up on, so I’m gonna get reading.

238

Aside from the couple p95 posts, I’ve been pretty phero-less. Probably for a couple reasons..

The first is that my dad’s been in town for the last two weeks and I’ve been busy just hanging out with him. He left yesterday and so now I’ve finally got some free time to go out and socialize.

The second is that I’m finding this need to try and find the ‘natural’ me, if that makes sense. I’m already in the process of cutting down my alcohol intake and for the first time in my life (that’s almost half my life for me), I’m considering taking a break from smoking weed. Part of it, is that I’m wondering if I’m just driving my body too hard. Definitely need to be getting more sleep.

Life’s challenges were staring me in the face and I feel that I’ve come to accept them. However, now I have a personal challenge of my own and I wonder how much of it is self-limiting. It’s a little embarrassing to discuss, but I suppose that is the beauty of anonymity. It can give you courage to discuss things that you wouldn’t ordinarily. I actually wished I’d talked to my dad about this when he was here, but I couldn’t bring myself to bring it up.

First off, I know I’m not gay. It’s not a homophobic statement or anything, I just know that I’m not. I have a masculine essence that cannot be avoided. My problem isn’t getting ‘laid’, per se. If I apply myself I can get to the point where I’m in bed, making out, taking off clothes and getting ready to get down and dirty. The problem comes with me. My mind doesn’t seem to be there. I wonder if it has to do with my recent string of sexual experiences and also my first time.

I don’t know how most guys consider losing their virginity. I don’t know if you count just sticking it in. But that’s what my first time was like. I was called up by a friend, she asked me to come over, and I stayed. But the problem was that we had a mutual friend that had committed suicide and I felt a great deal of guilt being with her, because I knew they used to have a relationship. At the time, I felt partly responsible for his suicide, and I kept restricting myself. (That seems to be the commonality here)

After that I had a couple tame sexual experiences until I got a gf. At that point, it was no problem. I leave for college, not having broken up like I should have, and inevitably, we drift apart. She’s doing shady things with some guys, but that’s not the point. I’m doing shady things too. A girl at a party comes up to me, starts grabbing on me, we make out and dirty dance until she tells me she wants to go upstairs and fuck. Again, fed by my guilt, I’m torn between going upstairs and staying ‘loyal’ to my gf.

Eventually she finds out through someone else because of my inaction and hangs out with some other guy. Then some other time, I walk into my dorm room, and my dormmate is hanging out with a girl. They don’t ask for privacy or anything, and he starts going to sleep. The girl’s about to leave and I say hey, where are you going? She comes to my bed and we start making out (see a pattern here?) she’s all ready to go, and at the last moment, condom in hand, I tell her I can’t do this and she leaves.

Finally the truth in our relationship comes out and I break up with my gf. I’m ‘free’. I start developing a relationship with a girl in the hall and everyone expects us to hook up. There comes a point where we’re almost intimate, but I pushed too hard and end up driving her away. Eventually she finds out that I cheated on my gf, probably didn’t like the egotistical manner in which that information was presented to her (I thought I was being honest) and we became ‘just friends’. This girl was the one that got away for me. After lots of time spent wasting away thinking about her, I finally got over her.

Then the summer comes, I see an old friend of mine, and we partied and shared a sleeping bag. We end up making out and I get it in her, but we decide to move it to the bathroom because we didn’t want to wake up the other people in the living room. It doesn’t workout there, I think, honestly because it was cold and she wasn’t that sexually appealing to me.

My ‘first’ moves down south and we meet up. We get intimate again, and again, I can’t seem to get it up. I believe it was from thinking too much about the first time and all my ‘problems’. Maybe deep inside, I wasn’t really attracted to her.

I go home for summer and meet a girl at my friend’s bday party. We get close and go home together. This time I’m fully ready to go. :wink: But she told me before we got home that she wasn’t looking to have sex. Maybe that was a shit test, I dunno, but I chose to respect that decision and didn’t even push the issue.

I come back to school and meet a girl at a party, she comes home with me, she’s giving me head and I can’t get it up that time either. I thought maybe it was from too much drinking. I don’t know though. Anyways, it’s that night when those frat boys come over and fuck me up.

For a while I let that effect me..

Then comes this most recent time, I’m hanging out with a sweet girl that I’ve known for a while and I’ve always thought she was cute. From the first time I laid eyes on her, I knew we had chemistry. She was sending me strong signals and I was sending her strong signals. We went upstairs, got hot and heavy, no clothes came off, but I figured her non-stop grinding on me would get me a little hard. Not the ticket.

Basically guys and girls, it’s been over two years since I’ve really had sex. I’m a little scared to think that this might be a reoccuring pattern, especially because my problem doesn’t lie in picking up girls, but in finishing the deed, so to speak.

On one hand, I think it might be a physical problem (hence me cutting out alcohol/weed), and a lack of sleep (hence me trying to sleep more). On the other hand, I think it is clearly a mental problem. If you look at the reoccuring patterns, there seems to be a pattern of me restricting myself. I’m not sure where it stems from yet, but it definintely seems to be there. Either because I think my social group will disapprove somehow, maybe I have too high standards?

I even took the initiative to stop masturbating for a couple weeks. Tried cutting out any visual porn, maybe I should try just once or twice a week, using only my imagination?

I really don’t know and as sensitive of a subject as this is, I’d really like some input from some guys that might have experience with this. I know my dick works because I’m able to pleasure myself without any problem. I’m 90% sure this is a mental problem, but I don’t know how to clear it.

I’m getting plenty of exercise and that’s not doing it for me. Usually that’s how I clear my head. Now, it only leaves me feeling satisfied. Maybe I should exercise less? Maybe my dick is just desensitized (is that possible? I know it happens to women who use vibes all the time. I don’t use male masturbators, but I’m sure my hand is a ‘stronger force’ than sex.)

Anyways, I’d really appreciate honest input on this. Thank you.

239

One thing about you, Phya, you’re always up for honesty.

I’m not a guy but I’d like to give you my take on this. Seeing as how I’ve known you for a while and read practically every thing you’ve written.

I applaud you for posting this.

Well, I know you’re not gay. It’s evident you don’t have any real mechanical problems with Lil’ Elvis, as he works fine when you and he are…alone. Though cutting down on smoking and drinking can’t hurt. Let me also say that occasionally equipment failure hits even the most lusty guys. Reasons for “failure” are myriad. Take your pick. For some there’s always quilt associated with sex, except in marriage and even then there can be quilt. Elvis is a good example. After Cilla had their baby he couldn’t fuck her anymore. He couldn’t get over the fact that she was now a mother. In his mind you didn’t fuck mamas. :roll_eyes: Poor Cilla.

I think what it is…is…you need emotional connection. Just sticking it in ain’t doin’ it for ya. It isn’t enough for you. I don’t mean from just your side, you need it from her as well. That’s the way it needs to be to get rolling for you. :wink: I think you may need a love connection to get the lust to the level that it needs to be. Forgive me for saying this but a sure fire way to test this theory out is…to go to a pro. The ultimate sicking it in experience, so to speak. See how that works for you. Then fall in love and see how that works. Of course, the later may take a little longer. :slight_smile:

Life is basically conquest and survival. The search for love is both. You’ve got the conquest part down.

I think (I know) a lot of guys aren’t the horndogs they’re made out to be. Personally, I’m not attracted to nor do I want to keep company with a man who jumps on every opportunity, as if it’s a law and a crime not to do so. It certainly says a lot about the essence and character of a man who is more discerning in his choices.

Oh, and another thing, while I’m here. * Cough * Stop fucking or trying to fuck your roommate’s ex-GF’s, unless you both really have a thing for each other. No wonder it’s bothering you. It might help to actually clear the way with your roomie about that, to make sure it’s over between them and he doesn’t have a problem with the two of you getting together. In that case, that’s what might be holding you back.

Ok, that’s it. Hope it’s of some help. I have no doubt about your ability to straighten yourself out about this. You’re already half way there.

I think you just need to find somebody to love who loves you back. :slight_smile:

Bella

240

Phya, firstly, any guy who has got the guts to post this has got serious balls, respect for that :wink:

Short story of my life. When I was 15, I was under the impression that I was the only virgin in my year, mentally beat myself up about it, tried too hard and scared most of the girls off. Later I realised that all my mates were full of bull, half of them wouldn’t know where to put it and the other half would hardly achieve penetration before shooting their bolt. One guy ( as legend has it) actually orgasmed while undoing his girl’s bra strap.

Nearly three years later, when I wasn’t looking, lightning struck, I met a wonderful girl, no pressure either way, when we were both ready, it happened, first time for both of us and ( as anyone whose first was worthwhile will tell you), I still remember and treasure the experience.

Nearly twenty years later, I have been divorced once, had several relationships and ONS and am now on my second marriage with two kids. Nothing compares to sex between two people who truly care about each other.

Stop putting pressure on yourself, it will happen when it is destined to happen. there is obviously nothing physically wrong, I would suggest that by trying to force the issue, you are stressing yourself out. It happens to every guy at some time, it’s happened to me once or twice and I would hazard a guess ( No guys I’m not asking you to tell us) that most of the guys on here over the age of 30 have been unable to perform at some time.

Booze certainly doesn’t help ( to misquote Shakespeare, alcohol increases the desire but decreases the ability) and to that end, the dreaded weed is even worse in that you can’t be bothered to even if you wanted to!

In short, relax, go with the flow and, when it happens, enjoy it. If the girl is worth it, she will be happy to wait until you’re ready.