I'm Getting Mixed Signals from a Girl. Should I use TUTH?

Field Reports & Anecdotal Experience Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports
1

Hey guys, need some advice here

Been talking to this girl since September. We started off kinda hot and heavy, dated about 5 or 6 times, got to third base every time (cept the first date which was making out and fondling) and then after about 3 weeks she told me she still had feelings for this guy. Okay i was crushed. Whatever. Cried like a baby in the freezer where i work for a few minutes :roll_eyes: got over it sort of :stuck_out_tongue: Mind you i really like this chick. I even caught her a toad by accident by the river (and still have it, waiting to give it to her because shes obsessed with frogs and toads :slight_smile:)

Bout a month later she texts me out of the blue “hey miss you, blah blah” So we set up a time to chill. I go over there and we just kinda talk, kiss a little in my car before i headed off to church. At this point I’m like “okay we’re back on track”

A couple days later we’re supposed to go on a fishing date, I text to confirm and get ignored. Lose control, panic attack, the whole nine and start bawling like an idiot again at my house in a maniacal fit of laughter and tears (simultaneously) yelling: “It’s just a F*cking girl!” LOL it was priceless.

The next month and change from Oct 27 to Dec 12th was a lot easier to get over than the first time. Still thought about her every day and missed her. But didn’t feel like I was losing control of my emotions and head. Anyways like i said she texted me a few days ago like “hey you wanna come walk around the lake with me”

Seems like she’s kinda using me when it’s convenient for her, but after going over to her place yesterday and confronting her about it, she says shes sorry, she broke it off with the guy (which i believe because I know her pretty well by now), and pinky promised not to ignore me like that again. I got serious about it and told her it was shitty and she agreed.

So yesterday we’re talking, hung out, and the vibe was really great. She’s drama free and doesn’t get offended by stuff, and i’m very attracted to her obviously. Shes just a really cool chick. So we’re talking about sex and at this point she seems pretty willing to (not right that moment but at some point) .. Fast forward to today…

Today she seemed super loopy and weird, very giggly etc. She said she was tired all day and took a nap (it was her day off), and the subject of sex came up again and she goes “what makes you think i’m gonna f you?” lol. great. so we go back and forth about it and i can’t really read her or tell if shes serious. What i find out is that she had been dating other guy on and off for 8 months and broke it off a few days ago. (when she texted me). She tells me “I like what we have” but if you knew her, our relationship has been strictly banter so I laughed it off and she kinda did too, which made it even harder to read.

My question is three fold: I have used Ammo on her every time we hung out. Should I go for TUTH and try to see what happens? I still don’t know if she was just messing around.

  1. Should I just chill out and enjoy the moment and the bond that we have created? We have become really close, but I was a little offended when she just flat out said that. It kind of threw me off A LOT.

  2. Should I try to just tell her this isn’t gonna work out so I don’t get hurt again.

Idk maybe it’s because she just is getting out of something, but I had no idea of that until today. I thought they were just kinda casual/fling status.

I know this is long, please let me know what you guys think.

-SS

2

Honey, this chick is bad news. Classic man-eater. She has zero respect for you, and she is very comfortable with lying to you! Please, PLEASE, for your own good, drop her and never look back! She might claim to have no drama, but she IS drama! She enjoys what she has with you because she can use and abuse you all she wants, and you keep letting her!

Please save yourself. She will never stop causing you pain.

3

I agree with Miss D. She sounds like she’s using you for attention/validation/drama and it probably goes little more than her loving to have you dance to her tune. Whatever you do, don’t regard this one as any kind of serious.

If you do see her again, then yes wear TUTH - Or add an equal amount of TUTH to your Ammo dose, which raises the None/other mones proportion to 2:1:1.

That way, she’ll know you ain’t messing - and her response will be very telling.

4

thanks guys. This is very depressing. :frowning:

I really like her, and it’s very hard for me to just drop her. I never get attached to women either so it just hurts i guess. I know in the back of my mind it probably won’t work but I’m always holding out and being glass half full or whatever.

It’s hard to come to terms with the fact that maybe I’m just not smart enough or experienced enough to see through it. The thing that really depresses me is the realization that there are women who are so manipulative and so good at it that you would never have any idea.

5

There are ways to see through her games. But the problem is here, you got your heart all involved. Your heart will blind you to someone else’s flaws. When they make you feel good, you forget all the rotten things they did to you, and you keep holding out for them so they can keep doing it again and again.

I’m not saying that you should never get attached to women. On the contrary, there are lots of fantastic women out there who would do right by you and be worthy of your trust. But keep your wits about you until you learn what sort of character a woman has. The moment a woman breaks your heart for any reason, take a good hard look at her and be honest with yourself. Did you get played by her inner bitch? That’s never okay.

6

Sorry Seymour, but I have to agree with Miss Dragon and mobo on this one. My take is she still has feelings for the other guy, and she’s using you purely for validation purposes / to feel good about herself. Possibly she’s even using you to make that other guy jealous in an attempt to win him back… Too many red flags here man. ‘I like what we have’ —> meaning you can be her emotional tampon, you’ve been friendzoned. ‘What makes you think i’m gonna f you?’ –> about as subtle as an earthquake… very rude way to rub it in your face again. No respect.

You have two options:

  1. EJECT NOW! If you don’t have control over your feelings for her, this the best thing to do believe me… She knows you like her, and she’s toying with you. Tell her she’s not worth your time and leave with your chin up and chest out… It’s the honorable thing to do.

  2. Carefully monitor her behaviour, and see if she keeps her pinky promise. Whatever you do, do not get emotionally involved with her any further. If you feel you can’t do this, eject. Wear Ammo + TUTH as mobo adviced. Best-case scenario you’ll get to f her a couple of times and have a short-term affair. She has demonstrated she’s not ready for anything long-term, so do not expect anything serious and just enjoy it while it lasts…

Good luck.

7

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Trust me on this one.

I am speaking from personal experience: She gets annoyed by her boyfriend, but does not want to dump him because she still loves him, so she is unsure. She does however want someone who can give her attention, so what does she do? She starts to hook up with you because she feels good around you. Now, since you think you got a nice girl on your hand, she can wind you around her finger, giving whatever she likes and not what you want. You on the other hand get the feeling that everything works well, and get dragged into the scam. This is the orange light.

The thing is when she ASKS you to fuck her JUST after she broke up (again), that is a clear indication that things are seriously wrong. She wants to have sex, she sees you as a potential for getting what she wants, and when she gets bored with you she WILL dump you for that guy, trust me. Its that we have condoms and stuff, but have you seen Maury and its shows? Girl breaks up, girl fucks random guy, feels sorry about having sex with random guy, girl goes back to boyfriend, she notices she is pregnant month later, boy stays with her because he thinks its his fault, she gets baby and boy gets all freaked out telling her that it is not his baby. Eventually they end up at Maury and in the end that random boy gets dragged in and has to take care of the baby.

If she wants to have sex, get her a vibo and let her have fun with that, but make sure your pants stay on, trust me. If you are into a serious relationship then she should NOT have an on-off relationship with another guy, it will kill the relationship with you. She cannot choose between him and you, and if the time is there she WILL choose him over you, leaving you confused and dazzled and alone.

Just try another spray without pheromones, and see how she behaves when she is around. If you notice a change in her behavior, less clingy and more distant, EJECT IMMEDIATELY AND DON’T LOOK BACK! Most likely its just the Ammo that causes the attraction towards you, but I think its best to kill the friendship if she does not stick when you are not wearing Ammo, even though it is really hard for you. I know, it sounds weird, but I had a girl clinging to me, telling me sweet words and telling me I was her love, and when i finally undressed myself and tried to f*** she told me that she didn’t want it, because I was “not making her aroused” and “her ex did a way better job”. Instant boner gone in the bedroom, instant love gone too, and I kicked her out of the house and told her that if her ex was better than me, she should go back to him. Month later she was back with him and I didn’t feel any regret. Didn’t last long either, 2 months later she broke up again. Either you love someone or you don’t, else you will end up sharing that girl with someone else. And in the world of “the strongest survives”, that will mean you have to kill the guy who she loves so she cannot get back, or just f*** that girl once because she is an easy target and move on for something that gives a more durable relationship. From what I read she is not really interested in you but wants to see how big that junk in your pants look like so she has something to compare (you with her ex most likely). Unless you are WAY better than her ex, you will end up with a bad headache and a serious bad mood. She is like the forbidden fruit, looking really good but has a nasty aftertaste. Either she has to give up the relationship totally, break up and never see him again for at least half year, or you will end up being on the losing side for sure.

8

I’m still on the fence about this though.

-If we’re still getting to third base, then I haven’t really been friend zoned. I also don’t know if she was just having an off day yesterday.

-She broke up with him, not the other way around. She told me that at 22, he was too young for her, got too clingy, and instead of leading him on, told him that it wasn’t going to work anymore. One of the things that I respected was the fact that at least she told me she had feelings for him the first time we stopped talking. It’s not outrageous to think that she did like him for the duration of the relationship, but started to realize that it wasn’t going to work just recently. We had a long discussion about it.

-Are you guys saying she’s lying about it altogether? If so I really would have to stop and evaluate everything I know about everything. I mean that’s utterly depressing. That would mean I know absolutely nothing, which just doesn’t make sense. :confused:

-I just don’t get it. When we were first dating, I went down on her all the time and got her off, and she returned the favor. Does that mean absolutely nothing just because she doesn’t want to immediately sleep with me now? I asked her a couple days ago why we didn’t have sex, and she said part of it was the guy (who she still had feelings for), and part of it was because she didn’t want to seem completely slutty and do it too soon.

Himeros, your advice seems the most logical. Everyone’s advice has been good, but in the context of what went on.. I think I have a big decision to make. After yesterday I feel like I have more control over my emotions than I did before. Something about our discussion really got me thinking, and I haven’t texted her or anything since then. We’re supposed to hang out this week or weekend, but I think I’m just going to let her make the first move, and if she doesn’t I will try to just let it go.

Also, Miss Dragon, I think that’s what happened yesterday. After the weird convo we had (she mentioned a lot of other things that stopped me dead in my tracks) I went home and had to really think about it, and also look at myself. So it totally makes sense. But you’re right, when you really like someone and care about them, it’s hard to do that. It’s hard to let it go.

I think I’ll just give her the cold shoulder for awhile. Is it not realistic for us to be good friends and see if it turns into something? I feel like we have become really close. If I can at least break free of my attachment, or make HER think that.. then maybe it could blossom into something without me or her really trying.

mrseeker, that is an interesting theory. Do I have enough balls to do it? (not wear anything pheros around her). Meh I don’t know Lol. :open_mouth:

9

Hmm, based on what you are telling right now, I still am not sure, but let me tell me my story I am going through now, and why I think its best to try once without pheromones.

I had a LAT-relationship for over 7 years. No mones, pure love. Worked really well, but for some reason I have been a bit slacky on the relationship and became a total crappy guy. Year ago she moved a bit closer to me, but I kept behaving like an idiot, demanding she should stay with me, and doing things she did not like at all, she left me and she told me that I should continue on with my life. This is pretty recent material. I totally freaked out, made the mess even worse, and then suddenly realized that if I want my girlfriend back I should completely alter my behavior in a good way. Also the A314 did seem to have a hand in that one too. Now I am trying to get her back as the new and improved me, using mones as the gun in my arsenal of love and some help about “how to be the perfect alpha male” as a guideline.

During that period one of her friends who was single came over, tried some ammo with TUTH to test its effects, and although we didn’t do anything except playing games, that girl who was once REALLY distant was now sitting really close to me, even suggesting I should watch a rather sexual series and I was overwhelmed by it. She was feeling like wax in my hands, I could just mold her into my perfect girlfriend. Just think what power I was suddenly holding in my hands. I could easily go to third base if I wanted to, fourth base was a bit more difficult. Its that the convo kept revolving around my girlfriend, else I think I could not restrict myself. If she was not a friend of my girlfriend, she would certainly date me right now, that serious it got by just using mones. Ammo is like a nuclear love bomb, I never thought it could be that potent stuff! I hardly knew the girl, and there she was next to me ready to receive some love.

Hearing about what that guy is doing with the girl, I would say its similar to what I was experiencing, the toddler with the blanket syndrome. She either needs to be very serious about her relationship with him, or let him go. If she can’t let him go first then its of no use to date you anyhow. She is not dating material right now, period. Cold shoulder would be good, but tell her that as long as she keeps thinking about him, its better not to date anymore. That makes her into a position where she has to choose. Does she stick with him, or continue on with you?

Assuming that she wants sex means that she is sexually frustrated. Trust me, I had that thought too, and it only gives a bad after taste the next morning. Like I said, try it without pheromones and see her reaction. If she does not stick with you even without pheromones, then dump her. Then she does not love you, but only sticks because “you smell so good”. That is actually a bad sign. Its like waking up with a random girl next to you smoking and telling you how well you were in bed, and you with a big headache not knowing what happened last night.

10

That’s a good point. Maybe say something like: Hey I don’t know what’s going on with you and that guy, but yesterday you seemed to still want to talk about it a lot. You seem confused, so maybe you should sort out your feelings once and for all and get back to me when you’re completely done with him.

Yesterday she said “I still feel bad about doing that to him”, but I just don’t have feelings for him anymore and at least I told him instead of continuing to lead him on. It made perfect sense, so I’m like “What are you going to do about it?” (he is still contacting her), and she said just ignore him, etc.

I’m pretty sure at this point the mones really don’t have as much to do with it as you say. Maybe I’m wrong though. I just don’t see why not wearing them once (after knowing her/dating her/talking for three months) would suddenly just transform her attitude into a complete 180 towards me. :roll_eyes: Then again, if i’m too p***y to try not using them, what does that say? I guess I’m just so used to putting them on.. it’s like brushing my teeth or something. I also think that Ammo, while it works, isn’t quite as powerful as advertised. It definitely does enhance situations though, and has gotten me a first kiss on nearly every first date i’ve been on since summer. But I don’t think it’s some end all be all magic potion.

I agree though, it’s still hard to say at this point whether she’s completely done with him. I want to say yes, but still not sure which is why I’m trying to pump the brakes a little. (unlike last time when she ignored me).

11

Same here - which is why I suggested an overt mix. If she is well-into you, she will take it in her stride and likely warm to you but if she’s an attention/validation seeker, she’s more likely to respond poorly/want to get away/not get close/physical with you -which will answer all your questions.

Don’t bank-on it. I’ve met plenty of her potential type who will keep their suitors (and I use that advisedly - she could well have others in the same position) hanging-on on the promise of being “nearly there” for sex/wonderful relationship or whatever else they feel will keep the guy on point for them - and this does include getting physical to just short of full sex, then having an off-day, crisis, become conflicted etc to stifle his passion. The cycle then begins to build again.

Again conflicted with her relationships/feelings - And a huge clanging alarm bell! A woman like this can often absolutely torture her poor suitor with her blowing hot and cold over other guys - esp ones who were otherwise poor to her in relationships, or who will regale them with tales of their great “lost loves” - its one of the ways they draw you-in and latch your emotions. Its a very strong confusing and attraction-building trait. Eventually contradictions will begin to emerge - so don’t suspend your credulity around her.

I wouldn’t say she’s lying (but I wouldn’t rule it out altogether either) but I’ll lay money on her having a very different take emotionally on things compared to you. Again, watch for the cracks beginning to show.

Not completely but when a woman is attracted to you, the transition between first getting physical, through partially sexual behaviour to a fully sexual relationship will be pretty smooth, not (dead-stop, start, reverse and start-again) - and questions of “sluttiness” will never come into it. I’d say she’s appealing to your honourable nature for dishonourable reasons. Again, a woman like this can leave you for dead when a guy who really turns her-on appears - and again, sluttiness will not be a question!

Actually a good idea. Your suddenly going absent for her can be a very good catalyst for any underlying attraction. But again, its very telling - so if you have to resort to tactics like that to keep her hot for you, she’s not a keeper.