Heya All,
Haven’t posted since my ridiculous pheromone boiling fiasco, for those interested, I still haven’t had a chance to extensively test if I really have ruined them or not, but that’s not the topic now is it.
Long story short is I’m starting a new job in a head management position in an industry I now have some knowledge of but essentially zero experience in, I’m taking over from a manager who has the complete polar opposite management style that I do, and being a whole 21 years old, I’m struggling to find confidence in myself and subsequently gain the respect of those underneath me.
Now I know eventually I’ll get a grasp of things, and basically “Get my sh!t together” but I’ll be fighting an uphill battle if the staff aren’t giving me the trust and respect that someone in a management position needs, now respect and trust needs to be earned and never demanded I know that, but I’m hoping to enhance my results and minimise damage by using A314.
Is my situation suitable for the use of the hallowed A314?
I’ve read that A314 can sometimes give a “Old man” sort of vibe but honestly, if that comes with making my job that little bit easier, then I’m willing to accept that.
Before I get flamed by the numerous people with their pre-canned speech of “Pheromones aren’t a magic cure to your social and work place inadequacies” I already know that, I’ve actually been using pheromones for a while, with decent success… (minus the boiling thing… ahem), and A314 isn’t an excuse to be a poor manager; I will earn the respect and trust of my staff, all I’m looking for is an indicator of if A314 will be of any help.
I believe it can help. Because the younger you are the sillier people look at you. I am not exactly how to 100% explain ti but I have experienced it first hand. People treat me differently in some places because I am younger. A314 can seem you look older like you mentioned and will get you more respect from others. Which is exactly what you need as a manager. So the people your managing will listen and do as you say. Hope that helps, take care!
This actually sounds like a great situation for A314. I would also get some Instant Shine and/or some Instant Honesty to buffer it if you find you need the buffering. Or maybe just to make the A314 a little lighter.
The only way to know whether to buffer it or not will be to give it a try. Wear the A314 on its own at first and see what happens. A little respectful distance is not a bad thing. Too much can certainly hamper things especially in situations where you need close coordination. So just give it a try and see.
I usually like to wear Instant Honesty with A314 as it generates meaningful conversations instead of the sometimes aimless chatter of Instant Openness. Plus it helps generate feelings of connection. Both could certainly help you in your role as a new manager. But mostly you want people doing their jobs, listening to your direction and getting the appropriate respect. A314 will help with that.
At the same time though you will need to quickly sort out who you can rely on and then get their honest counsel about what is going on, what should happen, what needs to happen, and who else you can rely on. Instant Honesty can help with that. At the same time they will need to feel they can trust you in general as well as to make the appropriate technical decisions.
Now on a general note I will tell you that people often as not want Leadership from their top managers as well as, and sometimes more than technical expertise. That is because you lead people and you manage programs. And as long as you provide good leadership and know who to ask to find out or learn the technical stuff, they will tolerate you not being the “technical expert”. Most folks will want to be the “trusted” technical expert you turn to. Be sure you recognize them at least personally when they provide the correct advise.
And watch out for the person who always wants to aks the technical question with the point of finding out what you know or don’t know and demonstrating that to everyone. Just turn the question around on them - “what do you think” or “what did you do before and why?” Or ask their co-workers to answer the question. Then you can say “thank you Ms. Jones for answering Mr. Smith’s question. Is there anything you else you are confused about Mr. Smith? I am sure Ms. Jones or anyone of the other smart people we have on our team can help us come up with the answer.” Either tactic works well.
Read my A314 Vs. Instant Gentleman thread below - esp. the part about alternating Instant Gentleman and A314. One you get yourself established, you might consider doing that also.
I usually wear two drops of A314 and two sprays of MX103 for work. First off, self-effect is amazing and it’s way better than cup of coffee 
. Oh you’ll get respect as well. Recently, I told my supervisor to re-draft my annual review because I didn’t think he spent enough time on it (plus I deserved better based on the evidence I have). He apologized couple times and fulfilled my wish.
Not saying that you’ll be given the power to push around people nor that you should, but it will give you some confidence boost and be respected by others.
Great advice here. Something else you might consider if you’ve ever had problems with -none at your age is splitting a dose between A314 and Instant Gentleman. Try the A314 first, and “if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it”, but if you get a sense that people are distant and perhaps a little intimidated, half the A314 dose you’ve been using and supplement it with a couple of sprays of Instant Gentleman.
IG has been shown to give people a perception that you’re older and more mature. Not to say that you’re immature, especially if you’ve gotten yourself a management position at your age. It’s just that for some people, age automatically indicates maturity level. So, increase your perceived age, and you see where I’m going here.
Congratulations, btw!
-D4