Somechick's Journal

Field Reports & Anecdotal Experience Women's Journals
422

So I am beyond stressed and I am just SOOOOooooooo done with everything. Work just added a bunch of responsibilities, which is great, because it means they are grooming me for a bigger role. Which may sound kind of lame because I work in a deli, but if I take over more ordering and planning, I will get another raise, and that will help with the new housing situation.

I have less than two weeks to get out of here and I don’t see how I am going to make it. I am doing my best, and that is all I can do. I really need some P130, because my mind is mush. I can’t process any more information. I can’t think straight, I can barely function, I am so tired and overwhelmed.

I have a bottle of P130 ordered, and it says it has shipped, but of course, that doesn’t mean anything because it tells you it shipped days before it actually does. It has been sitting there ready to be shipped since last Friday. I know I shouldn’t rely on pheromones, but P130 is such a great anxiety eraser for me, and I’d rather use it than take a pill .

I am just afraid it isn’t going to get here before the move, and that really sucks. I have no place to go still and if I get the house I am trying to buy, there is a 3 week gap between when I have to leave here and when I can close. Weekly rentals around here are about $1400 a week, so that is a lot of home improvements and I don’t want to have to spend that much on a rental. ARGH! I am going to lose it!

423

Potentially a good book. Memoirs of a Home :slight_smile: I remember Marilynne Robinson’s “HOME”.

424

So, WOW. I’ve been reading for days and finally finished (well, it shows there is one more page, but it won’t actually take me there). Thanks for sharing all that you have. You write so honestly and you’re experiments were great. Thank you so much for sharing!

425

This is truly a gem journal. May you harvest inspiration from here to build your own journal as awesome as this. :slight_smile:

426

OMG! I have had my computer set up for 35 seconds and this is the first place I came!!!

I have been living in a hotel with the kids since June 1st…LOOOOOOONG summer! But I FINALLY closed on my house last Thursday, which was my dad’s birthday. I have been trying to buy this house since March, it has been hell and if I ever have to buy another house, it will NOT be bank owned!

BUT I have my OWN house! It’s small, humble, but has a beautiful 2.25 acre yard with pretty trees and privacy. It has a nice attached garage and my favorite carpenter says its a good house for me. He has some projects here he is going to help me with.

I have missed reading and being part of the forum. I have tested some while I was dealing with the massive amounts of bullshit that went along with buying this house. So when I am actually settled and living here, I will post more.

I should have the place all clean and ready to live in by the end of the weekend.

I am pretty sure that having my own sweet little house should make me a major catch, so look out NH boys, I need someone to play with!

427

I’m happy to you your real estate nightmare has come to an end and that you finally found a nice cozy place to call your own with your family. Welcome back :slight_smile:.

428

I’m feeling the good vibes flowing too 'chick! Am happy for everything happening to your life now. You deserve the rest and the happy life. :slight_smile:

And I’m so watching this thread again. Major catch is in the house. :slight_smile:

429

Congratulations on your house and is a big step. Hopefully things will get back to normal. I used to stay in a ghetto fabulous motel myself for almost 2 years. It was frustrating some of the things that went on and how everything was broke all the time so I understand.

At least you have something that is now yours. Good to see you back here.

430

Congrats on the house and the move! changes are always so hard and scary (sad about the old house!). It can take years to build a home for yourself somewhere new but I can’t wait for your new experiences ahead! Time for 106 years of memories in a new place <3

431

While the kids were away this weekend, Scott was supposed to help me get my beds out of storage. I was going to hit him with some pheros. I figure I can get some eye candy(in my mind, anyway) even if we haven’t managed to get together.

I somehow lost a brand new 30 ml bottle of P130, P83 and some of my Vanilia Cops during the move, so I was kind of bummed. He reacted so well to P130in the past.

Anyhow, I woke up at 4 AM Saturday morning, with what I thought was indigestion and severe back pain from sleeping on my brand new couch for the first time. I got up and tried to get ready for work. I felt nauseated, but still thought it would go away. Had to sit on the bathroom floor with a hand mirror to put on makeup and dry my hair. Are you feeling how dumb I am? All this pain and I still tried to go to work. They sent me home with a plea to go to the hospital.
I tried to tough it out, was crying a lot, couldn’t get comfortable, tried the couch, the chair, the floor. My big dog, Rebel, kept coming over and licking my tears away and ‘talking’ to me. He could tell there was something really wrong, even if I didn’t want to admit it.

After most of the day, I decided that since it hadn’t gotten better and didn’t seem likely to, I called my aunt to drive me to the hospital. It didn’t take the ER doc long to suspect my gall bladder. An ultrasound showed an infected gall with a bunch of stones in it. They couldn’t believe I didn’t know I had gall stones.

They kept me overnight, took out my gall bladder Sunday morning and sent me home this afternoon.
I’m a hurtin’ pup, and all I can think about is where the hell did the pheros go and when can I find another chance to have Scott around?!

I feel like crap, and will be going to take a nap, but I had a few minutes to kill while I waited for my son to get out of the shower, so I thought I’d whine about my widdle boo boo on here.

Hope everyone had a nice and much less eventful Labor Day Weekend! This was NOT how I imagined mine going!

432

Get well soon, dear. Things can only get better. And those bottles you are looking for will be in the last box you unpack… It’s always like that…

433

Get well soon 'chick. :*

434

Sorry to hear that Somechick! You’ve gotten a bad feel there, it’s just like your dreaming. Things coming along along, looking forward to your days except you have that nagging pain within. I was going crzay when I had that same thing happen. My Gallbladder decided to act up on the day before where I was supposed to speak in a conference. After the Frustration of time and denial, asking for Pain medication to be able to get out of the hospital so that I can go complete my conference and come back for my scheduled surgery.

Yes, a sudden pain, a denial of the gravity, confusing it with another superficial pain, then, going into ER and having an overnight stay at hospital, surgery the next day. I’m sure it was host of emotions from fear, overwhelm, frustration and feeling weak, small and fragile. That’s right.
Now, that it’s over, focusing on making beneficial changes for you and your health because you need to gather resources, create a plan that you can stick to. As you have realized, I’m sure, looking backwards at your life and what’s happening, with this shake up, you see life is precious and you’re kids and family are precious it’s odd that now it’s evident that you realized that a healthy plan for you and your family is important because you’ve seen that it’s easier than you imagine to make these changes. You have a HUGE WHY to do this and it’s clear as day for you now to make the necessary changes and have a clear view of focusing on making sure what is the Most Important things in your life.

Mones will only work best on a live and healthy woman which I wish you to be! All the best.

1Alpha

.

435

Congrats Somechick! Enjoy your new pad!

436

I swear I will never understand men!

I have been nowhere since my surgery last weekend, except once to the pharmacy to pick up a rx for meds for thrush…yes! thrush! Oh the fucking joys of having all the skin peel off every surface of your mouth! And the worst sore throat ever! Strangely, I have been taking a probiotic so I wouldn’t get a yeast infection, which I haven’t. But I had hoped I wouldn’t get thrush, either.

Anyway, I digress. Men! Scott and I are not seeing each other, we don’t even talk about the possibility of it. It just seems we are never going to communicate. So I decided I am going to get over him. My friends all laugh at me, but I will do it. There is someone out there that will recognize that I have a lot to offer. BUT, he seems to enjoy being my friend…so he had offered to help me get my beds out of storage last weekend, which didn’t happen because I got sick. And I didn’t hear from him.

So I was peacefully sleeping on my comfy little loveseat nest this morning when the dogs went nuts. I jumped (yeah right ) up to see what was going on, and he was here. He stopped by to see how I was. He updated phones and lost all his contacts, so he didn’t have my number in his phone to call ahead. Anyway, he KNOWS I like him, he KNOWS I am trying not to, so why does he have to be so frigging nice when he is around!?!?

But that is not even the part of the day that KILLS me! I haven’t heard from Rob in 2 months, I deleted him from my phone and I don’t contact him. He doesn’t even know I have a house now. The last time I heard from him, he wanted to borrow money for a few days and I told him no. Well, actually, he did text once after that and ask how I was, but then he disappeared. So today, he texts and asks how I am. About ten minutes after Scott left. I tell him I had surgery. He asks what for, what happened. I tell him and he hasn’t responded in five hours…WTF! WHY!!! Why does he just pop out of the woodwork like that!?

I know I should just run away to Saskatoon and not have another thing to do with men, but I can’t seem to get my affairs ready for a move out of the country.
I know Scott and I are not going to happen. I accept that if he wanted to be with me, he would. I KNOW I deserve someone who actually cares. That is why I am moving on. I don’t think I will ever look at him and not feel the insane chemistry, but I can’t have him. So I am good with moving on. But every single time I spend any time with him, I find more and more to like about him. Today he was spending the day with a friend whose 18 year old daughter died recently. He always makes sure I am okay in the winter, with plowing, etc…dammit! Why must he be thoughtful!
And Rob, I am under no illusions that there is anything going on there, but why on earth does he have to pop in like that? I know, I know, I should tell him not to, but I had truly thought I would never hear from him again…

I don’t understand! I am the dumbest girl alive!

437

It’s not you, girl. Some men are dumb. There is nothing to understand from those, no matter how hard you’ll try. Don’t torture yourself or doubt yourself, move on.

438

I am with Conjurator on this one. I would enjoy your new house and work on your skin thing and get through anything you need to in your life and you know just have fun along the way.

On a side note I have found that taking probiotics either at least 2 hours before or 2 hours after taking antibiotics is best because the antibiotic may kill off the bacteria in the probiotics.

439

Thanks, guys. I AM enjoying my house. I am so proud to have finally managed to buy one. I LOVE my yard, I’m super excited to have my own garage (LOL), and the house has a ton of potential. I have a lot to do to finish unpacking and getting it the way I want it, but I am living in my own home.

Personally, I think that makes me a catch…I know, not very humble. But, really, I have a job, I’m funny, smart, nice, get hit on all the time, so I can’t be too hideous, have my own house. My mortgage is pretty small in comparison to all my friends, so I already have a ton of equity in my house.
although at the moment I am not too happy with it! The people up the street are having an insanely loud party*

Do guys not want girls with their shit together? That are not needy or clingy? Girls that don’t want to change them, but enjoy them as they are?

I am pretty excited for everything going on in my life. I AM moving on from Scott but I feel like I have this great thing happening in my life, and no one to share it with.

Last weekend in the hospital, I didn’t have anyone to visit me. Not that it’s a big deal, but the kids were with their dad and he lives more than an hour away. SO they couldn’t come. It was pretty lonely. And strangely the whole time I was there, everyone, male, female, doctor, nurse, assistants of all varieties, kept telling me how much they loved my hair. Even with bedhead!
So, even sick I am not awful to look at. Just undateable.

440

You are a highly dateable lady. A not awful to look at (too humble probably, sheesh), independent, confident woman, with a nice house, great kids and nice financial health, and, obviously, a fully functional head firmly installed between the two shoulders. Maybe you should try and go out to meet new men or maybe a dating site? You seem to know very well what you want, so you can filter out lots of candidates easily if they don’t fit what you are looking for…

441

I meet a lot of people in my job and through friends. I have tried dating sites, but no matter how thoroughly I fill out the questionnaire the people they match me with are not even close to what I am looking for. It’s like they see a male and a female and we are both human, so they say 'hey! 100% match!". It’s become somewhat of a joke with my friends. My ex-husband met his ladylove online, and they are great together. So I know it can happen. It’s just really laughable how far apart my matches and I will be. I mean everything will be like my polar opposite. They want kids, or their political beliefs are totally counter to mine, or they want someone athletic and slim, or tall. It’s actually pretty amusing, but it hasn’t gotten me a single date…and I would be willing to go out with someone who wasn’t a perfect match! But I can’t see dating someone who hates everything I am, or vice versa…

Oh, well…maybe someday. Until then I have a floor to ceiling bookcase project to plan, so when I am done recovering I can start building it!