Tater checked right.
Toilofday,
Excellent point. I believe that in the situation that talked about before, the woman operated in that type of manner. (Sigh) Hindsight is always 20/20.
My advice would be to find out how healthy their relationship is. Now since she said that her boyfriend would like you, I would hazard a guess that it currently is very healthy. If she really is the type of woman that is never without a boyfriend, the only way for you to have a shot is to remain in the picture as “replacement boyfriend candidate #1”. Its going to take a lot of patience, great sense of timing, and a lot of luck to get this woman.
-SwingerMD
Message came in for me. She will be in Lisbon in a few weeks and would like to discuss our successful engagement in hopes that we can work together again in the future. She also sent over her personal contact information and asked to have me call her at home.
That could mean everything or it could mean nothing. Think ill try to call her Tuesday morning and get in a few questions about her boyfriend if things feel right. None of our common associates said anything about a boyfriend.
Mate, i don’t knwo ya but why don’t ya forget about phero’s for a night and go with a load of really bad jokes it’s a dead cert for inteligent girls. Just really daft jokes with a few cheeky ones. Makinga girl laugh is better than any phero i should imagin. it will at least get you to the second date when you have your phero’s.
P.S.
Jokes where you sort of show her with your hands ha. always good.
As a newcomer to this community, I’m still figuring out how pheros work, and this forum too. So, I’m rep’ing someone for the first time, and that’s to you Tate.
I enjoy your journal and your posts. You come across as one of the great gurus of phero experimentation here, and yet you reveal yourself to be just like most of the rest of us guys. Couldn’t care less how the pheros work on any given girl. If it’s a hit or a miss, there’s plenty more of them out there. But when it comes down to that one girl, suddenly there’s no room for f*ck ups.
I just came back from a dinner with the one girl I am mad for. Her family was there too. Not going to go into backgrounds and details here, but our families have known each other closely for years. Never thought twice about her before, but then suddenly this summer, I woke up and had one of those WTF moments, and saw her in a different light. In fact, she is the whole reason I stumbled upon pheros. It’s funny, because when it comes to most girls I meet, I couldn’t care less how it turns out: if it doesn’t work out, I am always ready to move on. With this one girl, though, I just don’t want to mess it up! I have a feeling she may have a bit of a crush on me too, and I’ve been hoping that pheros would help me determine that and also help my game and give me an edge.
I had some nice subtle effects with the mix I had on tonight. We flirted a lot, and she was less reserved than she usually is. Not to mention, her sister, who was also there and sitting next to me at the dinner table, wouldn’t shut up - just kept yammering away. I wasn’t looking for this girl to jump my bones tonight, but I think I accomplished my goal in terms of “planting a seed”.
I swear by Instant Shine, and soon I think I’ll be singing praises for Instant Female Magic too.
Spot, I agree with you on all counts. Tater is definitely an asset to this community, and you are SOOOO right in that the one girl you really, really want to make an impression on can take whatever skills you have at picking up and throw them out the window. When emotion is involved, it gets in the way. Not a bad thing, but you can’t rely on game to get anywhere. You have to truly be yourself, because if a relationship takes off, that’s the person she’s going to be with. Not some caricature we like to make of ourselves when going out and prowling. That’s why it’s so hard, and you really don’t want to screw it up.
Reps beget reps, so I’m going to share the love.. Hope to see more from you and your endeavors!
-D4
Im with you on that. When its THE ONE, the stakes are higher.
IFM and Instant Shine are essential accent pheros for me. IFM, in particular, is amazingly reliable for what it does.
Let us know what happens with your SPECIAL girl too and thanks for the kind words.
Tater
The other guys Tater and Data have spoken well
Spot if you like this girl i wouldn’t experiment too much with mixes at the moment.Stay with something reliable though you really cant go wrong with instant shine and ifm they will help her feel good around you which is really important in the beginning.
The other thing i wanna say is if this girl likes you can now feel confident of success but remember even though she feels comfortable with you still you have to be bold and escalate the sexual tension.
OK Tate,
It’s been a couple of months now…what happened with your smokin’ redhead
She and the boyfriend are engaged. Rather than send someone to off him, I try not to think about it…much.
Oh…
…big hug filled buiscuits for Sweet Tater…
Tater, I just read this thread. I’m disappointed in you. By the sounds of it, you never even let her know you were interested. Something about decorum and all that. Yes, there is decorum to consider, but it sounds to me like you made the same mistake that I used to make. And it’s a critical one. That is… you expect her to make a move on you.
It doesn’t work like that 99% of the time. And take it from me… 99.9999% of women aren’t mind readers! You have to say, in some way she understands, that you’re interested in more than friendship. That doesn’t mean you have to disregard an in-place relationship… but if she doesn’t think you’re interested, she may refrain from responding entirely, no matter what she thinks, simply because of that!
My policy is this. If I find a woman attractive, and I am interested in more than friendship with her, I will tell her straight up. Body language, eye contact, and words. To her face. But at the same time, I refuse to play games. If she’s involved, she’s got to change that to single to have a chance at me. Tell her you are interested, but that you have been trying to respect her in-place relationship, and that’s why you haven’t done anything so far. She may have wanted you, but gave up because you didn’t say you were interested in a way she understood.
You don’t need to be macho, you don’t need to be rude, careless, thoughtless, you don’t need to be a jackass. But you do need to step up and show your masculinity and interest for her to be able to respond. She’s obviously not the type to go pounce the guy herself. Ask her how her boyfriend introduced himself. Ask her what she found attractive about him that first time. My money is on one word: confidence.
Hiding your interest while hoping she becomes the aggressor does not say confidence. I spent a lot of years alone because of that. And once I made that simple change… I had all the women to choose from that I could handle. Too many, in fact.
And then there are two other things to remember.
#1. All natural redheads are mine.
#2. There is no one woman who is as important as you think this one is, until after you have gotten into a mutual relationship with her.
I’ll explain.
I claimed all natural female redheads years ago. 
And…
The fact is that when you make one woman the only hope, the only point of interest, you make her seem so valuable that you begin losing your confidence because you’re afraid to blow it with her. And that leads to not doing anything at all. Which leads to… well… you see what that leads to.
Now I’m not saying this woman isn’t the perfect vision of loveliness. What I am saying is, she’s just a woman. And no matter how rare her particular traits are… and believe me, by your description, the physical traits she has are millions to one against, there are others who are as good or better. The more options a man has, the less he will be desperate. The less desperate he is, the more confidence he will tend to act with. And the more confidence he acts with, the more women find him attractive.
On top of that… “working on her for three years” screams “lost virtually any chance with her almost three years ago”. It doesn’t work like that. You’re going to need a major make-over of your attitude and confidence to have a shot now. Most any man experienced with attracting the ladies will tell you, in your case, just move on.
I can say that you still have a shot. It’s pretty slim… but it’s still there. Here’s what you need to do.
-
Get your hands on a good set of subliminal CDs designed to enhance self confidence, self esteem, and self worth. Make sure you choose a reputable maker, since a lot of the people making subliminals these days don’t know what they’re doing. I’m not going to suggest my own, because that would be advertising, but I will suggest the work of the only other producer I would trust with my mind: Dick Sutphen.
-
Practice talking to people. It really helps to use a mix of IO:IS for this, if you’re naturally shy.
-
Tell her the truth. Flat out. Find a way to make it natural, and not desperate/creepy. Don’t make her feel like you’re trying to steal her from her fiance. That will just lose you her friendship. Be casual, and “confess”, but mention that you respect her and her relationship, and that you respect yourself too much to disrupt her relationship, or go after a taken woman.
It’s complicated… there are a lot of variables I can’t account for in my advice because I’m not there, and I can’t see it all. But you’re never going to get anywhere if you wait for the woman to take on the man’s natural role. Trust me, it’s not hard… you already know her.
Best of luck to you. And stay away from the redheads from now on. They’re mine. 
PS - About the comment that statistically speaking, redheads have the most sex? You cannot generalize that or conclude that from a woman’s hair color. Red hair has correlations with intensity and passionate nature, but that can be just as effective in keeping her from having sex. Redheaded women are much more intricate than that. Consider the woman, not the stereotypes about her hair color. Every woman is unique, and an adventure to discover. Treat her as such.
Catlord, my apologies for embarassing the phero-old-timers like yourself. I couldve made a stronger play, i know. But her hair just took my breath away. Ive never seen that much hair on a woman…curly, vibrant red mane, so much of it, and so immaculate. Have you ever danced with, and twirled a woman with that much sparkly, perfect red hair? Like dancing with a Barbie powder puff while she speaks with an unplaceable sexy Italian/Spanish/French accent that sounds like shes cooing instead of talking.
Anyhow, Tater has a strict policy of not pursuing women who are spoken for. Husband, boyfriend, all bets are off. I dont move in on anyones girl and have encouraged a good number of women to give their existing relationships another chance.
Besides, all she had going for her was the incredible hair, the gorgeous face, that rapturous body, incredible wit, charm, laugh, money, political and business connections, remarkable intelligence and social acumen. Sure that might be enough for most men, but …
Oh, and i assure you…Tater is not shy, just awestruck.
Your a trustworthy guy Tater.Id trust you in a double sleeping bag with my gf.
Then again if she come on to you id be in trouble lol
Takes character to stand by your principles.I admire that
Thanks flaming. Its scary to say, and i know nobody believes me, but i believe very strongly in honor amongst men. If one of my friends claims a woman first, even if i know he doesnt have a chance with her, i believe its the right thing to defer and let him go for it. There are men, and there are dogs. I dont act like a dog and i certainly dont want a dogs’ leftovers.
Tater doesnt even take biscuit leftovers…well maybe Tisha’s. 
I like redheads too but it’s a pity the only ones I seem to meet are those who colour their hair red..
not really a recent post but I need some help on this..
When a 20-something you’ve agreed to go out with, the next time brings up ‘oh I’m seeing a boyfriend’, it could be a shit test then I guess..
I wonder how one should go about this.. how to pass the test, I mean..
ammunition is one way.. lol..
Just act like you don’t care. And really don’t care. See her anyway. You’re more of a man than her boyfriend could ever hope to be. You dig? When she brings up her BF, don’t get all flustered or depressed about it. Just a casual, “that’s nice,” and move on to whatever else you feel like talking about.
Thanks.. that seems like some very sensible advice.. it was the strategy I was thinking of using, too..
gitsmw is on the money.My opinion is when a girl agrees to go on a date with you her relationship with bf is on the rocks or she already considers you a friend.