Newbie in need of advise or what to order

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1

Hi everyone, I’m new to this forum & pretty new to pheromones. I would love to get some advise from you guys.
I am a 39 year old male from Los Angeles. I’m a little more built than an average guy with 15% body fat. I tend to be a little shy & lack social skills. I usually go out solo, & I usually wait for people I know to come to me to say Hi! 9 out of 10 times, girls approach me. People that do not know me tend to think I am strange or stand-offish, but I am neither. I am a big guy with long hair & I guess average looking. I tend to be a really nice guy (nice guys finish last, right?). I do not get intimidated & I am not the kind of guy that goes around trying to intimidate people (but I think I do sometimes).

  1. What do you think I need to boost my confidence in social skills, make people feel comfortable around me, & of course make women hot for me (preferably around my age or older)?

Here’s where I REALLY NEED HELP!!! (I have been messing around with Nexus & Pure Instinct the last couple months). I dated a 45 year old lady about a year ago for about 2 months. We were intimate a few times when we dated a year ago, but now we have become just best friends (she ended it).
She tends to be a little flirtatious with me after drinking (& maybe stoned). When we’ve been at a bar, she would cuddle up with me when I sit on a bar stool, she would hold my hand & give me a little kiss, she would walk around the bar 3 times in a row to sneak up & spank me when I talked to another girl (I think she wanted me to notice her & not forget about her) (I think she was stoned) :slight_smile:
St. Patrick’s party she would kiss me 10 times & tell me she loves me 10 times, then she would press her chest into me when she hugged my goodbye.
We went to the movies 2 weeks ago as friends, Then we partied at her place. She told me I could sleep on her sofa & I of course said ok. She started dancing around & howling loud out on her balcony like she had a plan of what we were gonna be doing! Her son ended up staying up really late:0\ She grabbed my face with both hands & gave me a hard kiss, then she came back by & did it again before going to bed:0/ Yeah, nothing happened :frowning:
We recently had a talk & she made it clear that we are just best friends & she offered to be my best man when I get married! lol. (She has always felt this way since we broke up, but she still flirts like this). I’ve turned down 11 girls this last year 'cause I can’t get this girl out of my mind!
2) Here’s where I need help again guys!!! We are best friends & she trusts me, so there is no trust issues. She is comfortable with me but she does have insecurities (at least until she gets buzzed). Next time I party with her, I want to make her hot down below, I want her to “see me” & “perceive me” as the Big Man that can satisfy her every needs, & I want my confidence boosted. What do I need guys???
What would be the application process & where?? Say I show up in the evening to party. Should I…
Show up wearing IS to get her smiling,
Add P83 for touchy/feeling when we get buzzed,
Add Ammo a little later to get her hot,
Add TUTH a little later to show I’m the man for her needs,
Then add P79 towards the end to intensify all her emotions!
I’m new so all this may be a bad idea, idk???
How would I know the doses/sprays if I’m using all 5??
What should I buy???

2

Well, I’d say you are in a near-impossible position here and whilst mones might help get some kind of a regular sex life back on for you, the chances of stabilising this into a meaningful relationship are low.

More or less, it sounds to me that she won’t shit or get off the pot - She will keep you around as a friend but keep you on tenterhooks for more with bouts of flirty/sexy behaviour, which may also sabotage any interest from other women at the same time.

I reckon you might need to stand right back from her for a while, then if you must, reintroduce yourself with a new phero signature and a radically changed attitude towards her.

Your choice of pheros is good, however I’d suggest you may want to leave the P79 out FTM - This is an unpredictable one that can amplify the bad just as well as the good and particularly so around an overt sexual mix. Similarly, P83 is far better used alongside something rather than on its own - I’d suggest Ammo and IS as your base mix - It is one of the best general attractiveness mixes - happy/sexy/social/masculine, all in one go. P83 compllements that nicely, then introduce the TUTH when closeness and kino are established.

Hell, she’s already physically/emotionaly comfortable with you, so I’d suggest you may want to try A314 and TUTH, to really signal status and capabillity, maybe with P83 to help physical closeness.

And considering your ages, I would suggest the 2x or “Heavy” versions of both TUTH and Ammo would be in order. This is due to the tendancy for a woman to respond to higher none when older and a man’s tendancy to lower none production as he ages.

But most of all, I would start looking at other alternatives instead and meeting other women. So something like IO or IG alongside Ammo and TUTH might be better - These are much lighter and more social, IO will help offset your imposing nature and make you more approchable and pleasantly sexy when combined with Ammo, whilst IG still has bags of status but is much less imposing than A314 can be (esp on a quiet guy) - Although you are of an age where A314 is very viable in dating.

And you might be surprised at her reaction when she sees you showing a more resolute interest in other women - It may well help her realise what she’s losing. :slight_smile:

3

Had to break-off - Just to add:

You should read these threads well before you get started with any pheros. All the basics on choosing and using are covered here:

We can’t really tell you how much to use as your body chemistry and range of social situations are very important factors. Pay particular attention to the “Sweet Spot” post on the first thread - you will need to take a little time with the none products.

4

Hello and welcome to the forum.

Mobo is right - she is keeping you around for a platonic semi-romatic guy friend. She is comfortable with you and trusts you but is not interesting in makking it a permanent relationship. But neither does she have the courage or the respect for you to let you find someone new - hence always “marking her territory” whenever she sees you with someone else.

What you really need to do is throw on some IH - heavy dose - and have a talk with her. Either you are boyfirend/girlfriend or you are just friends. If just friends she needs to let you move on to other relationships and you need to stop spending the night on her couch.

You might catch her in the right moood with some TUTH get another roll in the sack but that will not change the basic equation.

Get some Ammo & IO and move on.

5

I wouldn’t suggest another talk - Instead, throw-on some IH and tell her he’s stepping aside and why but not in a nasty way. Then step right back from her and leave it a while/minimise all contact till she’s desperate to get back in touch.

Meantime, he should be getting to grips with the pheros and broadening his horizons in all other ways.

Then see her again (if he still wants to) with a new sexy/social/hi-status phero sig and a take-no-prisoners attitude. And yes, no more hanging out with her at home/nights on the couch, unless its all-action. :wink:

6

Thanks for the help! Like I said, I am new to the phero’s, & I’m new to chat forums, idk how to attach a “Quote” to my post, idk what Trackbacks means, ect… :confused:

I did some more research on P79 & I agree that I shouldn’t mess with that stuff 'til I get experience. Looks like I need some A314 to mess with instead :wink:

I just had a full blood work-up, & I’m perfectly healthy, but my Good cholesterol is a little low. The Doc said my testosterone is in normal range for a 39 year old. My testosterone total was 348, normal is 250-1100 ng/dl. My testosterone free is 70.7, normal is 35-155 pg/ml.
Is this why you ( mobocaster ) suggested double strength on TUTH & AMMO?? Would having single strength make the scent too strong on me 'cause I have to spray twice as much?
I read somewhere else that you can spray -mones on the sleeve of your shirt. They claim it would last longer, & prevent my own body chemistry from making it less effective & smelling like piss. Any input??? Can -mones stain?

I think I’m ok with being just best friends with her (the 45 year old), but I sure would like to get some more lovin’ from her b4 she finds another guy! I think she dumped me 'cause I never really took initiative & I was celibate for 10 months (by choice) when I met her, so I was no Stallion in bed :frowning: We were intimate 3 times then she ended it, so it may have been 'cause of the “3 strike rule”. I’m ready to take initiative & Rock her World, which might make her reconsider dating me. :cool:

Now she is a Taurus, & you can’t really ever change there minds, but maybe you can persuade them into changing there own mind. Tauruses also tend to be possessive, even of there best friends, which is making it difficult to read her actions.

Girls of course hate rejection :angry:, which might explain why she wants my attention when I talk to other girls. But she is more this way when she is buzzed than when sober. Or maybe she just has better control with her emotions when she is sober.

She always asks me to text her when I get home safe. I didn’t text her when I got home a couple weeks ago (Easter Sunday) cause I was upset over wanting her & I think she knew. She texted me 2 hours later asking me where I’m at, but I ignored her. She then called me 3 times in a row 10:30am the next morning & left no message. I texted her a little later telling her Easter was nice.
She called me that evening & told me repeatedly that we are going on a date to see the 3 Stooges Friday & it’s gonna be awesome! We did have an amazing time, but I just got friend vibes from her.
Then we had the “I love you to death, but we are just best friends” talk (she seemed sober) a week later.

Here’s something interesting that I would appreciate some feedback on. I mentioned in my first post about the 2 other brand phero’s I’ve messed with. I was wearing PI & Nex when I was sitting next to her on the love sofa & I got some weird reactions (we always sit together on the love sofa, though she does have another sofa). She would make a deep quick sniff once in a while, idk if the scent irritated her or if her psyche was trying to identify the -mones. Then I noticed something else that same time… We always “sit back” on the love sofa together & watch tv, but this time she scooted her booty all the way up to the edge of the sofa & sat that way for a long time! Maybe the -mones bothered her so she scooted forward to kinda get away, or maybe they made her HOT & she was trying to get away from me to keep control of herself?? IDK, any ideas out there???

Sorry in advance for all the blah & q’s, I catch on quick though :wink:

7

Thanks mobo! I numbered you statement above that I would like to comment on.

#1) Im concerned of standing back, she is Mega Hot & she’ll have no problem finding another guy quick ;0/ I do want to see her next time with a new signiture though. I want to be cool, fun, confident, & fine with being just friends. Then I want the -mones to make her arroused by me, & for her to see me as her sitisfier :wink:

#2) Maybe that combo might be good if were just hangin’ out, chillin’, or doing errands together?

#3) That combo may be good if were partying/drinking! But I noticed you didn’t mention AMMO, why? Wouldn’t that make her Hot & make her want me?

#4) I agree! Should I wear some kind of “come f*** me” -mones when her & I go out to do errands so other girls will flirt with me in her presence, she may think that there must be more to me than she thought.

I had another question on the side,
In my case, is it a bad idea to wear -mones that would make her horny while we are clubbing? Could this just make her take some other guy home to satisfy her needs? Should I just wear those kind of mones when we are alone? And which -mones do you consider to be that kind??

8

Yes, partly scent control - Ammo is about the strongest scent in the AD range and partly because an older woman is liable to respond to a more overt signature in the first place, so you may still need multiple sprays, so it is a good economy measure.

Not with any AD product - they are all formulated for skin application. Some others are claimed to be suitable for clothes application (eg Alter Ego), however that is unpredictable at best - Different fibers all have different absorption/diffusion properties and many are no good at all. Then, you invariably need a far higher dose (4-6x IME) and they are still less effective. The fibers can still trap the pheros and stink in a way that is difficult to remove even by washing I even find Alter Ego more effective applied to the skin and can use it far more effectively that way.

You need to overcome this and be ready to take the consequences - IME this often shows a strength that can be surprisingly attractive. But yes, they often do find another guy fast but often it is just as much of a sham “relationship” to get back at you. You can’t control who she sleeps with just now, so what’s the worry?

I’m a Taurus - Stubborn, resolute and bloody-minded are my middle names! :stuck_out_tongue: :smiley:

These and other behaviours you describe are not unfamiliar to me and causing an idea to form in the back of my mind - its not a good one. Not going to put in words yet.

Yes, she could well be detecting the change in your phero sig and reacting but your not being congruent with it confuses her.

Again, this is an absolute classic response from a subject to someone wearing an overt (usually none-based) phero in an inappropriate setting and/or not being congruent with the signature. They get uncomfortable, testy and sometimes even angry or aggressive - IME, it is very seldom if ever because they are turned-on. A lighter more social sig is far better at this time - make yourself attractive in other ways. This is another reason why you need to cut down the time you spend just hanging-out and make the time you spend with her count in all the attraction building ways you can. These also let you be fully congruent with the sig.

9

LMAO! about the Taurus thing! I’ve been studying a lot about that sign this month, I’d say about 30 hours online reading. Just trying to understand her better & figuring her out.

Would appreciate your input on her behavior, I’d rather have bad news than be confused. I’m a Virgo, so I’m kinda like RAINMAN trying to figure out “who’s on first”, 'cause I have to figure it out. lol
Would love to get her buzzed, then put on some IH & find out why she dumped me. I would do this later down the road after trying to get back with her dating or just sexually.

10

1 - This is a risk you have to take. She currently knows you find her hot and thus she can wrap you round her little finger because of it - You show her that you are unmoved by her looks (even to the point of taking interest in far less attractive women)/friendship and she will have lost a lot of her power over you. That surprisingly can magnify sexual attraction many-fold - you have had a hint of this already when she has sabotaged your talking to other women and from the way you feel towards her despite how she has treated you - its called “Push-Pull” by the PUA guys and she is currently doing it to you expertly.

At the moment you are only a friend, so yes, she could meet another guy who turns her on and and leave you for dead with him there and then. Its not at all nice when that happens but you are in a no-win situation here because the more time you spend just being her “friend” (no matter what mones you wear), the more likely this is to happen. :frowning:

The other thing about what concerns me about women demonstrating the traits you describe is that they can always find another willing guy/victim no problem - that goes with the territory but despite trying to rub your face in it initially, they will nearly always come bouncing right back to you, probably sooner rather than later.

2 - Yes Ammo/IS is a good basic attraction mix that is useful across a wide variety of situations and well enough socially moderated to signal sexuality without the negative effects of more overt mixes. Do wear this when/if hanging out and yes, it will help you at point 4-.

3- This is exactly the mix you asked for at the end of your OP - very overt/mature/high-status/capable/“know what I want” and unashamedly sexual. However this is far less social than an Ammo-based mix and you need to be able to be highly congruent with it - from your described personality, I feel it could hinder you in meeting new women (initially anyway but work on it for the future) but as she already is very (if not too) comfortable around you, it could shake her-up a lot in the right environment but its important not to waste it just hanging out - keep this for the pubs and clubs instead when you can demonstrate your most attractive/sexual qualities around her.

Simplicity is also the key here - Less is often more with pheros and this mix is a perfect example. Use a fairly high dose of A314 and a relatively small amount of TUTH to steer its sexually. Do not overcomplicate it with other pheros. All I might add to this is some P83 to encourage physical closeness, or some P114 to expand its sociability a little. Mostly however I just stick to TUTH/A314 - if you go for the oil base, PM Steve for a password to the A314 forum and you will find much more discussion. However, the A314/a spray will also have a lot of impact with this. Oil is still best/most subtle and long-lasting IMO.

A314/TUTH works best with more mature women IME - 30s/40s/50s are most attuned to its sig - younger women can be repelled or find its status far too serious/daunting. More fun/social/socially engaging mixes are the way there.

It is possible yes but you are facing a very real likelihood of this anyway and clubbing/partying does give you the best opportunity to use sexually overt pheros most effectively - Its up to you to capitalise on this environment and have her want to take you home for more. And don’t let her land you on the couch again. Get-up and go home, even if it means walking miles or an expensive taxi. :slight_smile:

11

Later - I really need to know a lot more but don’t really want you to write everything. Lets see how you get on from now.

Don’t do that! Its as big a passion-killer as you could ask for and the chances are she won’t even tell you the truth anyway, no matter how much of a friend she may be at heart.

Concentrate on the here and now and the feelings she demonstrates in current interaction.

12

Welcome to pherotalk Manimal!

I am a little confused by her behaviour so I will let the guys handle this as they have done well so far.

The only thing I can think of is that she has been hurt before and like most of us know as soon as we give up the cookies that the men leaves and as much as she wants to she doesn’t want to you to walk out on her.

She might be partly right seeing that she is driving you crazy simply because you can’t have her.

Your gc was issued!

13

Just placed my first order!

IS 30mL
TUTH 30mL
AMMO 30mL
A314 5mL spray

Should get it all Friday AM!

I’ve read they throw in a gift or 2 sometimes too, hopefully it’ll be something like IH or IO so I can try it out too! :slight_smile:

Can’t wait!!!

14

Welp, I just got my order this morning :slight_smile:

My roommate was grumpy all morning, so I put on 2 sprays on AMMO + 2 SPRAYS IS. I waited 5 minutes, then went into the kitchen when she was in there, first thing she said was “did you just put something on? It stinks!” :frowning: I did notice a little while later that she was in a better mood, she was out back with headphones on swinging her head like Stevie Wonder & singing a Bruce song out loud! lol

The AMMO scent is ok, but I’m more of a JOOP, PLEASURES, I AM KING, FAHRENHEIT, kind of guy.
AMMO is probably fine for at a club, but not sure about using it when I’m kickin’ it at a girls house, it seems too strong. Any tips???

15

OMG!!! I am a 100% believer of this stuff!!! This sh*t just blows my MIND!

I dated this girl just over a year ago, we have been best friends ever since & nothing more. I went to her place for a little 5 person bbq party.
At about 9pm I put on 2s TUTH + 1s AMMO + 2s A314 (all 3 at regular strength)
We sat next to each other like usual on the love sofa. Right off the bat she was scooted up against me & she continouslly tried to press her body up against me even more! Around 11:30pm I added 1 more spray of TUTH on my chest. She started crossing her leg over mine for a while & lightly shaking her leg. I had my hand to my side & she kept on crossing her hands together & placing them on top of mine! A couple times I would slide my hand in between hers & she would pull her hands away & put them between her knees (this happened 3 times), then she started interlocking her hand & fingers with mine for a while a few times! And she rested her head on my shoulder a couple times too! None, & I MEAN “NONE” of these things have happened for over a year!!! She gave me several multiple regular kisses (this is typical).

We only see each other about 3-4 times a month, but now she wants to go to the movie tuesday, she invited me to see her son play sports wednesday + friday, & we have a concert sunday!

I texted her when I got home & she texted me back 2 times…
“GooD Night My most special Guy!!! I <3 you. See u Tuesday talk to u tomoRrow”
& “I know u will not b here Tuesday. JuSt dreaming”

Now there was no sexual contact & no french kissing.

I am really blown away by these -mones :open_mouth:

Any tips??? Should I stick with this mix & take it slow & let this tension build up inside her to where she’ll finally makes out with me?
2s TUTH
1s AMMO
2s A314

  • 1s TUTH (2 hours later)

Or should I add a little more to make her nuts!?

I’m concerned about making the first move 'cause she made it clear 2 weeks ago that we are just friends & nothing more. Her trust & friendship means everything to me. So I think I need to get her to passionately kiss me first!

16

Excellent! :smiley:

Well, you can try a totally different signature but as you had such a strong response, I would tend to stick with this mix as your basic and see it through.

Upping the overtness of the none as you go-on is good, so interaction can build to a more sexual state naturally but it might be good if instead of bludgeoning her with still more none (although at her age she could probably take it), you add something feelgood or even a disinhibitor instead to help things along - Instant Shine or P83 would be my first choices here. The IS will help her feel very good about being in your presence, whilst the P83 is great at helping physical closeness/touching/kino (both ways) along seamlessly. IH might also help with bonding/sharing a “special moment” feeling but I would shy away from P74 because you don’t need any more of the “best friend” vibe that it can encourage.

I would say that from your description, after the second application of TUTH, she was very much in a state where she was wanting you to make the next move - you got a bloody knee-trembler off her for heaven’s sake! That’s about as clear a signal as you can get! :smiley:

Everything you describe just screams it and remember that you had just hit her with a strongly enhanced sexual and status vibe which has turned her on and put you very firmly in in command. Next time this happens, you will need to capitalise on it and take that risk with your feelings of friendship for her by becoming more determinedly sexual. Enough to make your interest quite clear anyway, do it physically - don’t vocalise it and don’t stop for a “talk” or you could completely wreck the mood/moment - This needs to be one of these "“it just happened” or “was just meant to be” things. I’m not suggesting you start ripping her clothes-off straight away of course - Unless she gives you some very clear green lights! Which with this kind of mix, can happen suddenly - and I might lay good money down on at least some part of her actually wanting you to do it that night. :smiley:

As for her wanting to see you more - this can be both good and bad. We tend to call it “Fallout” and it is quite prevalent with A314 (several threads if you search) again it is often better to leave her wanting more rather than being available for her every demand on your time, if you can’t capitalise on her renewed interest, don’t do it - And maybe think about “being busy” for at least one of those potential dates. Same goes for texting - My past experience of women in this state is that they can start to text/call you constantly when you are not about. This is not a good thing, so don’t be in too much of a hurry to reply/respond and don’t feel you have to respond to everything. Let her mind/imagination fill-in the gaps - this can help a lot! :wink:

To that end, a more status/social/lightly sexual mix may be more appropriate for the Sports day and remember that if this is outdoors, it will not have quite the same impact as indoors - the effective diffusion range will reduce markedly. But carry what you need to transition to a sexual mix if the situation changes. However, don’t use it if you land-up socialising with her and the boy together. Keep the sexuals for one-on one adult time. :slight_smile:

17

FWIW, I’ve had a woman give me exactly that talk and within an hour, she was the one on top wearing just a cowboy hat, going at it hammer and tongs, on a night that left me with carpet burns in some quite surprising places. In her case it was a social/playful/sexy mix that got her going - MX297/IS/TUTH.

And she didn’t regret it one bit and was even phoning me at 3am Sunday morning, despite not having seen me for several months!

So its “actions, not words” and “a sense of the moment” that applies more than anything else here! :smiley:

18

LMFAO!!! I’m now humming the song “You Can Leave Your Hat On” by Ty Herndon :cool:

I just received my first order Friday, & I just placed my second order already! lol. Yeah, this shit is that good! :wink: I ordered 4 of the 5mL of> IH, IO, TUTH, & AMMO ds.

I am the worse! She could sit in my lap & straddle me, & my dumbass would just put my hands on her waist & tell her she is pretty, that’s all I would do :angry: I think with my heart & not my hard-on :frowning: I think this is why she dumped me in the first place. I know for a FACT that these -mones will get me to the point of intimacy with her, the only problem is me following through with it :angry:
Calling Dr.Phil… calling Dr.Phil!!! lol
Her melting spot is her neck (taurus trait) :slight_smile: I would like to whisper something in her ear like “dinner was wonderful” & then kiss her on the neck a couple times, if she pulls away- I’ll stop, if she stays- then I would continue & start rubbing her leg, or something.
Any input would be great, even if you have to say “you’re a dumbass manimal!” lol. I read everything you’ve sent me several times, I would appreciate any direct &/or specific tips, as you can tell that I severely lack in this dept. :o

19

To make matters worse - She actually wanted me to sing that song in Karaoke for her! :open_mouth: :smiley:

20

OK, start by reading this thread fully:

The Poster Radman has written some truly excellent stuff on projecting sexuality and interacting. It will be one hell of a trawl through his postings but well worth it - he has distilled many of the various approaches into clear, concise and everyday-applicable language.

Lastly - neck, great! a perfect opportunity for gentle touching/stroking etc before moving-in closer for a kiss. And yes, go so far, pull back for a bit, resume and of course if she shows signs of pulling back/discomfort, stop! Resume later/another time if she gives you the green light again, so don’t make it a big issue or seem that bothered - You can expect to dance back and forth on this for a while maybe.