Shortly after my last post, I left the country for the holidays. Had an amazing time. I’ve been slammed since I’ve been back with a million and 1 people to see and things to do so this might be a long post.
I return on NYE. The second I land, both of my marathon sexers text me instantly wanting to know if I’ve made it back into the country safely. WOW good memory! The key players currently are 1) swinger guy 2) old man (he’s not but acts like one) 3) marathon sexer with huge dick 4) anti-cuddler #2
In the background, there is this guy who gets to me who I actually haven’t seen in a long time, let’s just call him asshole. We fight like siblings and he doesn’t believe a word I say. He is the one that wanted to be my boyfriend, said he was on his way to my house, and then just didn’t show up. He’s back in the picture now (don’t ask me how, it’s a long story)
MX274 2 sprays chest
2 sprays of 5 mcg of p78 back of neck
So I’m jetlagged, kinda sandy and dirty from the beach, and totally disgusting from my 20 hour flight, but Marathon Sexer wants me to come over. I can’t resist. I show up after showering and getting myself together, he looks like a slob and his breath smells so bad I have to ask him to brush his teeth! but he did clean his room. We fuck for hours and hours and hours. Every time I think I’m never gonna fall in love with a better bigger dick, one happens to fall in my lap. I mean it’s my favorite. BY FAR. (how many times have I said that in this journal?) He tells me I can “take it better than anyone” and how much he loves fucking me. We go out to eat at a small diner, I was all nauseated from the turbulence and couldn’t really eat. He ends up staying home to stay in bed with me. We nap, fuck, and get ready for our respective parties. Total, I think he climaxed 8 times! Talk about the best welcome home party!
So I go home for another quick nap and planned on spending NYE alone by seeing one of my favorite bands. I see that my package from AD has arrived and there is so much to explore, I don’t even know where to start! So I pick one randomly that I can take the tape off in a hurry and it ends up being MX. (I wanted to go numerically but that didn’t work, so I tried 469 bc you know, 69, but mxwon simply bc it was the only one I could open the fastest.)
1 spray MX on wrist
1 spray MX 380 chest
I’m having a great time at the show and was a little nervous that being alone would depress me. It didn’t. I danced, made friends, and at midnight was loving the song so much, did not GIVE A FUCK that I didn’t have anyone to kiss. I mean if you had my sexathon earlier that day, you wouldn’t care either. So I feel totally liberated that everyone is trying to fuck and I am just by myself having a grand ol time. It really proved a lot to me about my personal Independence and happiness. I couldn’t have felt more positive about myself starting off the new year. The crazy fan-friends I made standing near me snuck us backstage to meet the band. I do NOT enjoy this type of behavior and it embarrasses me to no end. So while I’m quietly trying to stand in the corner, out of the way, and not look like a total fucking groupie (Yuck) the fan-friends start calling me out about what a big fan I am and how I know all the words etc etc etc. I just about died.
One of the guys in the band makes eyes at me, steals me away from the weird fan friends, we start talking, taking tequila shots, and all of a sudden we are best friends. It was a privilege to get to know him, a really solid dude, and we partied the night away. We felt like we knew each other forever and even spent New Years Day brunch together. So I guess, thanks weird fan friends?
The next day, I have a date with Anti-Cuddler #2. He is really intelligent and good looking, we have the most potential of anyone in the mix right now. But he may be too into anal and that’s a deal breaker for me.
1 spray MX chest
We meet at a bar for oysters and drinks. He looks really handsome and I match him well. I thoroughly enjoyed our conversation! He genuinely wanted to hear about my fight I had with my best friend and what it was like to see my family for the holidays. It’s very rare that a guy gives a shit about what you’re saying, but in this case he did. We go back to his house, it’s still early, we do our thing, and he has to sleep because he has to work on the weekend. Not only do I not want to sleep at 11 pm on Friday night but I do NOT want to sleep with anti-cuddler! it’s so awkward! So when I say “Ok, let me get out of your hair then” he doesn’t argue and walks me out. His friends/roommates were over and I was saying I was shy to walk passed them but he reassures me that he told them he was going to see me and that they know about me. hmmm interesting, what exactly do they know? Still no compliments from him, but sexy sex and amazing conversation.
On the cab ride home, I call Swinger Guy. Man am I the energizer bunny or what? He agrees to pay for my cab to come see him. Ugh I love this. So I go to his house, we watch a movie and cuddle. I’m determined to not make the first move bc I’m still annoyed with him. Our last conversation was more like “no I’m not coming over, but you can ask me out on a date” which he reluctantly finagled his way out of and since I wanted to see him, I lost my ground. (I got no cajones!) I end up sleeping over and he tells me that he likes me but he’s got issues about other people and does better on his own, basically a slew of excuses why we can’t date. Ok. Whatever. I’m not hurt about it. I think I’m partially in denial about this bc I know how much he actually likes me so I don’t really care what we do or call ourselves.
The next day, I have a date with Old Man. He is by far the one that is most committed to me and clearly wants something “real” with me. We talk everyday and have gotten quite close, even while I was out of the country. I respect him a lot and can be myself around him. He adores me and gives me the most genuine compliments. He has a successful career, I’m attracted to him, things are easy, but I can’t help but feel there is a spark missing. He enjoys comedy but our conversations are rather dry. He is extremely intelligent and open-minded but I keep feeling like he is very “run of the mill” and ordinary. Is that fucked up to say?
2 sprays MX on chest
tight skirt, high heels, sweater
He is being such an amazing date. He patiently understood that I was jet-lagged and almost napped through our date. I was 25 minutes late, enough to make most people angry but he was very patient and cool about it. We talk about all sorts of things, he tells me how much he admires me, what he likes about me, etc. It’s a really smooth date. He knows I’m annoyed with his anti-cuddling rule and promises to make me feel more comfortable at his home bc he likes me sleeping there. He’s been calling me “babe” non stop and for some reason it comes out so casually for him, as if we’ve been dating forever, that I don’t like it! He convinces me to stay for breakfast and we spend the afternoon together.
He wants to see more of me and is understanding of my work schedule. He’s a catch and I’m not throwing in the towel yet, but I can’t pinpoint what it is that isn’t getting me excited about him. What’s holding me back? bc the things I’m annoyed with are stupid things, like I’m searching long and hard to find things I don’t like about him.
So I have to be honest and say that I didn’t shower after him and I think the mones were still on me the next day at work. Also, I’ve been wearing the same scarf that lies close to my app points and it’s been smelling like MX*** (and TBH a bit copulin-y which makes sense bc they are “old.”) So all my patients gloat and brag about me to my attendings as if I’m the best doctor they’ve ever had. And trust me, I did NOTHING special. I wasn’t even that nice that day.
To re-test the “day-after” theory, I spray MX*** (2 sprays) on Tuesday night when I go over to my friend’s house. No change in her or her bf’s behavior at all. (I put it on just in case I visited any of my other boys in the hood but it didn’t happen.)
At work the next day, same thing! Patients talking my ear off, flirting with me, men and women alike, just totally loving me.
Ok don’t judge me, but I’m curious to see the longevity of this and IT’S ASS-FREEZING COLD OVER HERE, so I don’t shower a couple of days. Hey it’s science. I applied Tuesday night and Friday afternoon had the hottest patient ever who was totally flirting me. He was looking for any excuse to ask me questions, get me to touch him, finding out more about me and vice versa. I really wish I could have just asked him out but was way too scared to do it, you know professionalism and all. My supervising attending even asked me why I didn’t ask him out! It’s taking all my strength to not be a creep and send him a message on Facebook.
Another patient on Fri afternoon was interviewing me and trying to set me up with his “loaded grammy-award winning” nephew. AND! The supervising attendings were fighting over who got to work with me. There are 13 other interns they could have fought over but they wanted me! That’s one of the greatest compliments ever!
Friday night
2 sprays MX chest
Jeans, sweater, heels, same scarf
I have a date with the OKC guy from a while back who I was convinced was wearing mones. He started seeing someone this holiday (EVERYONE DID OMG I’M SO PISSED ABOUT IT) but I was really happy for him because it’s been years that he has let anyone in. I think I’m making a positive difference
anyway he says I still smell incredible and it’s the same smell, but he’s wrong! He hasn’t smelled this! What he is referring to is Neroli/ p78 or MX 274, or my cover scent Diptyque Eua Duelle (very vanilla based goes well with the vanilla fragrances) He’s begging me to include him in this side hobby of mine but I’m being very stubborn about sharing. (sorry AD, I got my sister and my bestie to purchase from you guys!)
Anyway, there is ZERO flirtation on our date because he is really hung up on this girl who isn’t on the same page as him apparently. For the record, if a girl talked this much about another dude on a date, the guy would have sent her flying straight to the curb. But I’m kinda more of his friend at this point and I enjoy being there for him. It’s obvious he needs me about this topic and he’s totally falling apart. I really want to support him making himself vulnerable. We do our thing, I sleep over and leave in the morning. OH and I HAD TO PAY. To be his therapist/friend and he stopped going down on me right before I was about to go. He’s fired for reals this time. I just really wanted my necklace back. Which by the way, I’ve left a necklace at every guy’s house this last month, the jewelry is totally declining rapidly and I wish I didn’t lose my two favorites 
Conclusion: MX has longevity. Not as much sexual for me as much as it is bonding. People opening up and talking to me who already know me and flirting/trying to open up from new people.