"Venting" my Adventures

[Lor]

@Tigerlilly

“EST is actually sexually-dymorphic, meaning the effect a man has wearing it is totally different from a woman wearing it around men. A man wearing it only gets the self-effects of calming, & women may “mother” him.”

Thought that was very useful, so I’m putting it up.

The data I am finding also indicates that men are much more tactile and fond of each other when a guy is wearing it too.

I wonder if KatieA were to wear EST around her female TG’s what would happen… maybe I will send her some EST to find out!

all that explains men behaving differently, but does not go into detail about women.
in my experience,
there is no “mothering” by myself while wearing it,
and i am aware of that because i wear it with the hopes that i will be treated more kindly without “doing” anything to recieve that kindness.

and if a man wears it around me (one has once)
i didnt experience anything different.
but that was once.
i just dont “feel” EST.
im not picking up women feeling EST either,
and i would really like to,
because i would like to soften their vibe as well.

as often as i wear it, i just dont see it.

[Tigerlilly]

Personally, I respond very well to P74, which is why I had it in those mixes. However, I am more interested in P86. Can you make p86 work for you?

I would be very interested in p86 + TAL mixes. I will probably be wearing one tomorrow.

I think b-nol and p74 have a real affinity for each other, at least in my expereince. I think you mentioned that you use a mix of
TAL
betanol
EST
Cops
p86
p74

for work??

@Lor

well i told you i was thick.
seriously though,
i have done IO alone many times, as well as IH alone.
i have done P74 alone, and then P86 alone and TAL alone.

synergistically speaking,
i have never done just P74 and one-other,
simply because P74 never was my fave molecule.
i have used P74 mixes however.
they were nice but not money.

i cant pull out of it something i can use at work,
and unfortunately my funtime is only work time (ok so its not so fun time) but as a rule,
i dont have time to myself that isnt spent at TARGET or running errands.

P74 although i have ALOT of it at home, is nice but not yay!
and i cant get it to make me money*.*

[Tigerlilly]

Have you read the Distressed post in the Women’s main section? head on over to my Journal and read Tish’s take on my MX300 in light of that post. I found it very interesting, as that is EXACTLY what you said, a WHILE ago…

[Lor]

@Tigerlilly

Have you read the Distressed post in the Women’s main section? head on over to my Journal and read Tish’s take on my MX300 in light of that post. I found it very interesting, as that is EXACTLY what you said, a WHILE ago…

i did, and thank you

yeah well alot of what i write shows up later in other threads,lol.

im a phero magic-8-ball or a phero fortune cookie.

or maybe im the phero-whisperer and the bottle told me so…

yawn im tired,lol.

[tisha23]

LOL Phero whisperer. I like that. That would make a cute
t-shirt phrase

Your a guru girl, A lot of what I learned came from your posts

Tisha

[Lor]

@tisha23

LOL Phero whisperer. I like that. That would make a cute
t-shirt phrase

Your a guru girl, A lot of what I learned came from your posts

Tisha

we all learned from someone,Tisha .
people here were so helpful when i first appeared that you cant help but want to be helpful as well.
its a good-feeling virus
but honestly, trial and error are the only real teachers, wouldnt you say?

its so funny how i no sooner sneeze-out that something is different,
and the forum somewhere gets a cough,lol.

this is what happens in my day as well;
i remark about not having seen someone in a long time, and that person shows up in the bar for a beer after being MIA for over a year,lol.
weird.

[Lor]

okay,so tonight i only wore:

IHX2 -1 spray

IO- 1 spray

regular chatty behaviour
tips pretty decent for a slow night

people that dont usually hang asked me for a recommendation and stayed for a strong out of character beer.

newcommers to the bar shared “what i lived as a child” stories

there is always unusual trust when i wear this stuff.
people leave money/credit cards on bar.
people ask me to choose their beer.
there is this whole putting things into my hands.

[Lor]

i have determined that betanol/nol in general is essential to getting definate feedback that isnt assumed or exaggerated.

[Lor]

well , outside of phero-use
i am feeling a bit disrespected at work.

there is nothing malicious, just allowance of unjust things that go unremedied until someone makes a move.

my take on this is that you can either bring things to a head and things go bad,
or
you can be adult about it and know that if you dont like something and you have addressed it like an adult,
then its your problem if you dont like something and you need to move on.

i have adressed it like an adult and brought this “issue” to bossmans attention.
now i have to decide if i like the idea that things will be allowed to go on and i have to suck it up for the money.

those of you that know me (Fever) know i HAVE shot my foot to spite my evil leg, and i will prolly do it for the rest of my life.

i guess i never want my children growing up thinking they EVER have to be disrespected in order to make a paycheck.

life is too short.

well the issue is this:
quite a while back
a gal was allowed to come in and turn the bar upsidedown because she was “cute”.
i didnt care, as long as it didnt interfere with MY money.
if the bar lost money, oh well.
i have walked out once, after she came behind the bar and went through my stuff looking for something to pour in.
under my pocketbook?
um hell no, i dont think so.
i walked out the door and bossman talked me back in.

this girl has come in THREE different times, left me a TAB all THREE TIMES, and and left a mess.

frosting on the cake-
all 3 times she asked me to fetch her tab.
when i went to retrieve it,she walked out.

what does bossman say?
oh well, live and learn. let it go.
after all, shes cute.

of course, cuteness just drank his beer and pissed off his help-
he has to be getting something out of this, im not stupid.

well she came in with a boyfriend last night, and bossman asked her to sit in front of the register.
outloud i said “are you crazy?”

question guys-
was this disrespectful???

so in this light, im considering quitting.

i know people at work check this thread out occasionally.

im not saying anything that hasnt been said, so i dont feel its wrong venting in my journal.

sigh

maybe after the weekend i’ll feel better.

[djandarial]

damn that sucks Lor… working in bars is not piece of cake, when I help out, I really hate those girls who think they own the place… it’s a bar… what’s to own… a haunt? lol spooks who knows…

[Lor]

@djandarial

damn that sucks Lor… working in bars is not piece of cake, when I help out, I really hate those girls who think they own the place… it’s a bar… what’s to own… a haunt? lol spooks who knows…

no doubt, brother

shes not in often enough to act like she owns the place,
but how she is allowed to behave the way she does makes me less mad at her,
MORE mad at bossman!

she’s only doing what she is allowed to do.
HE IS ENCOURAGING IT!!!

sigh

im too old for this shit,LOL

[Tommy_Fever]

you have integrity Lor.

Don’t worry dear. If you get thrown under the bus, i’ll pick you up at the next stop.

[Lor]

@Tommy_Fever

you have integrity Lor.

Don’t worry dear. If you get thrown under the bus, i’ll pick you up at the next stop.

as spongebob would say,
this is a bunch of barnicles.

its funny how you can walk 5 miles because it feels good to,
but feel totally exausted after only a few hours of meaningless BS.

dude im tired. im ready to have fun.

(hear THAT, lotto-god???)

[Tigerlilly]

Lor,

Yes.

I do not know your place in the food chain at the bar, but the Bossman has put his foot down on the issue and has stated who he will and will not have in his bar. You are not stupid, and yes he is getting something out of this, tangible or not. However, your place is not to determine who sits in front of the register. It’s his bar.

You have made your feelings known on the matter and he has ignored them. Your only recourse is do act. Choose to stay, and realize that HIS actions will net him HIS results, and you are free from any blame/consequences, as you stated your position. Or choose to leave. The bar will go on without you, and she may raise hell there again, and Bossman might one day say “Damn, Lor was right.”

Can you let him make his own mistakes?

It is not disrespectful to you if your “higher ups” are making their position known. He feels she is accepted in the bar, and will allow her behavior. When that impacts you personally (going through your stuff, breaking a law, stealing, etc) then yes, act and react accordingly.

If you were both on equal footing, then yes, ignoring your views and opinions would be disrespectful. But since you are a subordinate, and it’s his bar, what he says goes.

Yes, it may be crazy to have Crazy Cuteness sit in front of the register, but at the end of the night, when he has an empty till and you have a wad full of tips - who feels stupid then?

We always have to report to someone in life. We will never always agree with it. Instead of asking yourself “Can I suck the “disrespect” up for money?”, ask yourself if you can allow the Bar Owner/Bossman to make his own mistakes, and possibly learn to trust your instincts a little more, if it goes down bad and you turn out to be very much “right.”

Maybe not what you wanted to hear, but my take on this issue. :o

[Tigerlilly]

@Lor

its funny how you can walk 5 miles because it feels good to,
but feel totally exausted after only a few hours of meaningless BS.

Hear, hear, sister!

[diane999]

@Tigerlilly

Lor,

Yes.

I do not know your place in the food chain at the bar, but the Bossman has put his foot down on the issue and has stated who he will and will not have in his bar. You are not stupid, and yes he is getting something out of this, tangible or not. However, your place is not to determine who sits in front of the register. It’s his bar.

You have made your feelings known on the matter and he has ignored them. Your only recourse is do act. Choose to stay, and realize that HIS actions will net him HIS results, and you are free from any blame/consequences, as you stated your position. Or choose to leave. The bar will go on without you, and she may raise hell there again, and Bossman might one day say “Damn, Lor was right.”

Can you let him make his own mistakes?

It is not disrespectful to you if your “higher ups” are making their position known. He feels she is accepted in the bar, and will allow her behavior. When that impacts you personally (going through your stuff, breaking a law, stealing, etc) then yes, act and react accordingly.

If you were both on equal footing, then yes, ignoring your views and opinions would be disrespectful. But since you are a subordinate, and it’s his bar, what he says goes.

Yes, it may be crazy to have Crazy Cuteness sit in front of the register, but at the end of the night, when he has an empty till and you have a wad full of tips - who feels stupid then?

We always have to report to someone in life. We will never always agree with it. Instead of asking yourself “Can I suck the “disrespect” up for money?”, ask yourself if you can allow the Bar Owner/Bossman to make his own mistakes, and possibly learn to trust your instincts a little more, if it goes down bad and you turn out to be very much “right.”

Maybe not what you wanted to hear, but my take on this issue. :o

I’d add only one thing here. And that is I’d find time to talk to bossman when little sister isn’t around and say something like this, “You know that my concern is not only for myself, but for you as well. Personally, I don’t think this girl can be trusted. But you are the boss, so I’m backing out of this completely. But I will take steps to make sure she can’t steal from me, and I won’t be taking her tab anymore, but referring it to you. I’m not going to say anything else about the matter and the chips will fall where they may.”

• or something to that effect to clarify where you stand and that you aren’t going to buck him or try to mother him any more. Then when he has to feel the brunt of the outcome of his own decisions, he can’t blame you and he has to take responsibility for his own decisions. And if he has to take care of her tab every time, and get nothing in return, maybe his feelings will change on the matter. But even if they don’t, it doesn’t affect you any more.

Diane

[Lor]

@Tigerlilly

The bar will go on without you, and she may raise hell there again, and Bossman might one day say “Damn, Lor was right.”

Can you let him make his own mistakes?

It is not disrespectful to you if your “higher ups” are making their position known. He feels she is accepted in the bar, and will allow her behavior. When that impacts you personally (going through your stuff, breaking a law, stealing, etc) then yes, act and react accordingly.

Yes, it may be crazy to have Crazy Cuteness sit in front of the register, but at the end of the night, when he has an empty till and you have a wad full of tips - who feels stupid then?

We always have to report to someone in life. We will never always agree with it. Instead of asking yourself “Can I suck the “disrespect” up for money?”, ask yourself if you can allow the Bar Owner/Bossman to make his own mistakes, and possibly learn to trust your instincts a little more, if it goes down bad and you turn out to be very much “right.”

Maybe not what you wanted to hear, but my take on this issue. :o

im not sure i gave enough info on the story then,lol.

there is no wad of tips when i am asked to wait on people he never intends to let pay.

in the bar biz, that is NEVER appropriate.
you are supposed to announce to the help that they dont have to pay.
NOT say that them walking out is not right, and then allow it again.

if she tells me the tab is in bossmans hands, i respect that.
dont tell me that you would like to pay,and then run.

there is where allowing this to continue is disrespectful.

i never said i find making your position known disrespectful,lol.

bossman isnt saying i like her,allow her;
he is saying i know she lies and oversteps, and that is NOT okay…
but…while she is here …lets ply her with beer and put her in front of you.

see?

so,
i do not feel he is making any mistakes,with her.

his only mistake is not being honest with me, and then i have to decide if i want to work with someone who is not straight-up with me.

this is where venting allows me to feel out where i personally stand on the issue.
as i hear myself talk about it, do i feel that i can allow this ?
or
do i feel that i am disrespecting MYSELF by remaining there?

THAT is my issue…

all my layered mixes saved me from reaching over the bar for old-times sake.
grand exit is what i have to unlearn.

[Lor]

i am soooo MX134ing it tonight.

i need to make some money because money is distracting

[Lor]

@diane999

I’d add only one thing here. And that is I’d find time to talk to bossman when little sister isn’t around and say something like this, “You know that my concern is not only for myself, but for you as well. Personally, I don’t think this girl can be trusted. But you are the boss, so I’m backing out of this completely. But I will take steps to make sure she can’t steal from me, and I won’t be taking her tab anymore, but referring it to you. I’m not going to say anything else about the matter and the chips will fall where they may.”

• or something to that effect to clarify where you stand and that you aren’t going to buck him or try to mother him any more. Then when he has to feel the brunt of the outcome of his own decisions, he can’t blame you and he has to take responsibility for his own decisions. And if he has to take care of her tab every time, and get nothing in return, maybe his feelings will change on the matter. But even if they don’t, it doesn’t affect you any more.

Diane

what effects me is that people who DO tip and pay their bill dont get timely service because i have to deal with this kaka.

its not that i care if she steals,lol.
i WELCOME mistakes that dont effect me

i care that people SAY one thing and do another.
i guess its what pushes my buttons.

again, i think i am just too old for these games

[marty]

I’d politely tell the boss man that you’re not gonna serve her, and let him deal with the whole entire mess himself. There are plenty of other customers who need taking care of.

I mean jeez, what’s a guy gotta do to get a drink in this place?