I simply forget to watch others body language. At work, I’m pretty much rushing around with tunnel vision, trying to get work done because now I’m officially the only guy left there along with 15 other female coworkers.
I dont mean to say that the girls dont get any work done. They do its just when an event happens (like a coworker finally becoming in an official relationship with her boyfriend) they just talk and talk and talk. So I’m running around giving samples, cleaning the tables, topping bar, ringing people up, refilling the topping bar.
Only time I notice hits is literally on my break or after I get off my shift because I can relax and become more laid back.
As for school, I can detect body language easily simply because I never pay attention to whats being written by the professor and I can watch others.
(in my two classes I sit directly in the middle of the room. I usually get there first) So stuff like yesterday when I was surrounded by females when there was 20 other seats open, stands out.
Simply put, I forget I’m wearing mones sometimes. Especially recently now that I’ve become full time at work and have to pick up some slack sometimes.
Anyone else ever been in a similar situation? forgetting to watch others.
Of course, as with anything new you’re looking for you haven’t quite become unconscious competent in that department. It takes focus for you to notice etc.
But as you practice more and more during the slower times of your day, you will develop keener senses.
I’m just now really committing myself to learning NLP, will go for a certification before the year’s up, and I love studying body language, I have seen my ability to pay attention to the smaller details in life grow.
Break it down, create small exercises for you to accomplish throughout the day. For example today, while wearing an A314 / CTTM / IS mix, I decided that I would watch for the blatant IOI’s (hair flipping, proximity etc.) and some of the not so noticeable (to the beginner that is) IOI’s like pupil dilation etc. More important was the dilation. I was able to watch a woman’s eyes today go from pin points to saucers as our interaction went from taking her order, to getting her to laugh, of course as her eyes dilated, the hair flipping began.
I will spend a week doing something like this. Then I will spend another working on watching people breathe, and then pace their breath to create rapport.
The guys at work, I give them PU tips all the time, and constantly point out when they’re getting major IOI’s, they know that all of this is a big hobby for me. So some days I will pick a couple out in the store, and will try to decipher what’s going on via their body language. I say it out loud to them, the reason, is that when you teach something it creates greater retention.
This whole hobby is a one big game for me and becomes increasingly so as I learn more. now that I’ve added mones to the mix, hooyah! I’m in hog heaven.