Hehehe . . . despite Dr. Phil . . . hehehe . . .
Who needs a dating site?!? Anyone else got a serious cyber-crush on Toilofday?
That boy doesn’t even need pheromones. Whew. 
xoxo
jp
Oooh…
sing-song voice Toil has a girrrrlfriend… 
Well, I went to True.com and signed up for the one week trial - which I will cancel tomorrow as I am so grossed out/disgusted, etc. Most guys anywhere within my age range are looking for younger women. The cutoff seems to be 45. The bitter irony is that while I am not a big “looks” person, they look really OLD to me, lol. Some of them so much so that they HAVE to be lying - and liars are what they should get in return.
Then I saw, read other stuff that makes it official…I’m swearing off men forever. I don’t care how the world sees me, I know I deserve better than this inanity. I love men but they are just going to have to be buddies from now on. I’ve been in love. I have kids. Enough already.
This is so not fun. It’s supposed to be fun. Time to take up knitting, or collect sex toys, or both. I’ll use the pheros for the other stuff, respect, fun, be smarter, happier, more focused. I’ll applaud the adventures of the rest of you flashy ladies. Read gothic novels. Retreat to my fantasy world. Gain 50 pounds. Pick at my corns. Anything but THIS.
I am not prepared to settle for anything less than everything I want and I sure as heck do not need one more iota of struggle in my life. I think that’s what I needed to know - and I do. Whew.
Go kat!
xoxo
jp
I’m the closest one to him! Nya nya!
You could knit bags for your sex toys.
And good for you, seriously! Never settle for less than you deserve, which happens to be all the world.
It’s almost funny how things show up when you stop looking for them. I wish I would learn that lesson permanently.
:o Um…eh…er… Hi! haha. So, do you ever make it to Indiana?
She does have a point.
You ladies are great. You should see the smile on my face right now.
the official reason is “because gay people can’t get married and we are a marriage site”
Hey vkat…True.com is, as far as dating sites go, one of the ones that I believe said that you can find “hot” singles…I steer away from anything like that. While I AM hot , most of the ones going on there are probably looking for sex. You may want to seriously consider looking on match.com. I met my man on there (as well as a lot of other, very nice men). I had almost given up, but decided to give it “one more go”, and found the one that I believe may be my soul mate.
Just my 2 cents worth…
well that sucks! I’m sorry that it was such a negative experience for you. I was just trying to think outside the box.
to be honest, whilst i’ve dabbled with dating sites - I didn’t really go looking for, or find, the love of my life on them. It was more a way for the Universe to know I was open. I dated a lot from there - some pretty decent guys too, just not the right guys for me.
really?
be a bartender and watch the madness everyday!
i havent bartended in months,
but i am slowly thinking of taking up knitting myself.
i mean, i have way more guy friends than girlfriends.
i do block my ears and scream “la la la lal la i dont HEAR you…” but it doesnt work.
men that dig younger women turn me off physically (im talking much younger) and i cant look at them sexually.
to me it feels like an esteem issue.
younger women are more likely to look up to you,depend on you,especially for money.
im not lumping everyone “there” in that catagory;
just when its your freakin JOB, statistically speaking i see more evidence.
the more i look, the more i want to close my eyes 
the optimistic side of me however says that i know for sure i am not exploring every avenue, and that the world is much bigger than my perception of it.
open my mind to one thing different,and the world just got bigger-
including the dating scene 
with that said, im going to look less and have fun more, and when your not looking…well…im convinced THATS when he pops up
[quote=“Nunya, post:51, topic:2590”]
well that sucks! I’m sorry that it was such a negative experience for you. I was just trying to think outside the box.
Oh Nunya, it’s not your fault - and I had toyed with the idea before. It’s just the culmination of everything. You’re a doll and I appreciate you and Carrie making the suggestions. It’s all just information, in the end. I think this was helpful, I really do feel relieved to know what I am and am not willing to do or buy into.
Dolly, True screens people and prosecutes those who lie and are married or have a record. They have done it too, to a guy who slipped through their background check, which apparently isn’t all that extensive but it’s something. They tried to get legislation forcing dating sites to do some kind of check and created quite a furor. It seems like a step in the right direction.
They do, however, have this little video of a very cute girl in panties and bra laying on her bed chatting away on the computer. It’s not outrageous, she’s cute and innocent looking but it does give one the impression that this is the sort of person you want to be talking to, fosters that fantasy. Nothing wrong with fantasies. But in real life, people, men and women can and do fall for somebody who doesn’t match their list of physical attributes and “see” it all different somehow.
But to be fair, at some level, everybody is looking for sex, including me, of course. Men like me and I do have male friends - come to think of it, more than female. I always have. I could have sex with some of them, but I value our relationship as is and I’m not wanting to tinker with that.
And I’m not looking to get married again or all tied up-it’s just that unfortunately, the sex-thing just doesn’t work for me without some kind of other connection. I wish it were not true. It’s not about morality for me because I make my own at this point. I don’t think there is anything wrong with casual, heedless sex when everybody knows what the score is and there is certainly nothing wrong with me doing it because I’ve paid all my dues and I don’t owe anybody an explanation. Those guys on there are also human beings who do deserve to have what they want too. It just…doesn’t…work…for me. Sex toys really are a decent stand-in for that and much safer and more reliable. I just need to leave it be and be ok with it.
I’ve been thinking a lot lately that the most important things to me at this point in my life are freedom and authenticity. Feeling like I need to be somebody else’s idea of what is desirable and needing their approval or validation is still lurking in me big-time whether I like it or not but I think my real work right now is to get completely free of that. So it’s all good.
Enough of the heavy stuff…there’s more interesting things going on in this thread…back to fun…
And VKAT, you know, the moment you give up, is the moment you will have the most awesome guy in the universe trip accross your path. That is what happened to me.
Hey Ilsa…I sent you a PM…did you get it?
Check your inbox.
It is amazing, isn’t it? The older we get the more comfortable we become, as women, with our sexuality. To make a statement like that at a younger age we might be labeled a slut. But women are allowed to like sex too, just as much as men. -Sometimes more actually, we just express it differently.
Not only can they be a decent stand in, but sometimes even better than the real thing. lol. And a whole heck of a lot safer too. Just line them up and give them names. Jack…Richard…Johnny… Hmmmmmm… let’s see… tonight I think I’ll have a date with…
Now we’re having fun again. Hank. I just remembered Hank, my imaginary boyfriend. I made him up and my daughter and I had such fun with him (of course Hank is the best boyfriend your mother could have, he’s such a great guy. Everybody loves him). This is what I get for being unfaithful to Hank, after all he’s done for me and the way he was so kind to my children. Shame on me. Hank, I am so sorry, to hell with batteries, I’m ready to commit. Let’s pick out a power cord.
And then there’s BOB…stands for “Battery Operated Buddy”…
You’re seeing Bob too?? 
That jerk. 
We’re so over.
Tomorrow.
xoxo
jp
Toil, I’m pretty sure there isn’t a snowball’s chance in hell you’ll still be single by the time I get out to Indiana. A girl can dream though.
Mwah.
xoxo
jp
p.s. Glad we made you smile.