OK so, here’s the deal. All of us guys at one point have had or still have a GREAT deal of “Approach Anxiety”. I have truly seen it first hand with myself, friends, colleagues, etc. etc. of all races, colors and creeds. Let’s face it..NOBODY and I mean NOBODY likes to be “shot-down”, “turned away”, “made to feel like a fool”, “ignored”, or the God-aweful words like “refused” or “REJECTED”!
Now let’s take a moment and reflect on those words. They all inspire a negative connotation and value. But guess what…they are normal and happen everyday to MILLIONS of people or they simply would NOT exist! I mean there are handfulls of examples in movies, books, experiences you know of…blah blah blah & yada yada. Just take Tom Cruise and Kelly McGillis in the bar scene in “Top Gun”. Tom Cruise goes to great lengths to sing “You’ve Lost That Lovin’ Feeling” to Kelly McGillis trying to woo her and gets “crashed and burned” but ends up getting some playtime a bit later. Did that bother him…NO…Did he feel embarassed…maybe for 1 minute…He didn’t sweat it!
Now so…this moves on to the next point. It seems as though people, myself included until I started to grasp pheros a bit more, are used to turning to pheros to create attraction that pulls women to them and alleviates their “approach” problem. Although this seems to be the great way to solve “approach anxiety”, I tell you I believe it further proliferates the problem because you think the pheros are going to pull women to you like a “tractor beam” and rip down walls and have them throwing themselves at you. Simply put, that is not the case, although it does happen SOMETIMES.
I implore you to take a different approach with pheros. You should think about it like this. What phero or phero mix makes me feel more studly? What takes the edge off of me and makes me feel like the man? What makes me feel open and curious such that I am approaching women? What makes me feel like I can ride the confidence tide? What helps me feel good about me and feel comfortable in my own skin? What helps me feel shiny? If you confront “approach anxiety” this way, you are breaking down your own barrier such that you don’t have to worry about anxiety with women and won’t have to keep searching for the mystical “tractor beam” that is going to just pull women to you out of thin air! Try to find that special sweet spot that makes you feel like the man!
You know that scene in “Jerry McGuire” when Tom Cruise is feeling low about the clients running off to another manager…Cuba Gooding, Jr. does a great job of making Tom Cruise feel back to stature…well take a minute and watch it here at this link.
You gotta make yourself feel like Cuba Gooding Jr. You get mixes and pheros that help you feel like this, then guess what brotha, you have created your own mystical “tractor beam” by breaking down your own walls and feeling like YOU are the man!
Take It Eazy
-JP 
