That’s the truth. I suppose my sense of humor doesn’t really fit in all the time. Truth is, I need to just keep my mouth shut with some people. That’s pretty much what it comes down to. I’ve noticed that the people that have no sense of humor often have no sense of self, at least not a positive one.
Onto today. Three sprays of IS. Shine has never really produced results for me, at least not what I’ve noticed. However, for the first part of work I was humming a bunch of different songs to myself. Songs I haven’t heard in a a while but are favorites of mine. The mood lifting is really subtle for me. I think the crash might have been 7 hours later, but it wasn’t a crash but more of a greater sensitivity to the criticism of others, if that makes sense.
There is something to be said for IS. I wore 3 Sprays IS again today. There really isn’t a reason for these two women to reach over my body to use my computer. I’m not saying that they are sexually attracted to me, at work that would probably be bad. However, I do feel like the IS gives women a lot of comfort/happiness. Playful banter turns out better with more smiles etc. People more willing to help. I can see why Steve uses this with pretty much everything. I can’t remember testing with anything over 3 sprays, but I bet the results to a point are exponential and not geometric.
Today I wore 3 Sprays IS and 3 Sprays IO. I think that’s about as much neroli as I can safely handle. I mean, it’s not like I was cologne guy or anything, but I like to walk around without much of a scent, and even though the dry down is really light, I just would prefer not to have much at all.
I was by myself most of the day, until about 10 hours after application (I know, right) a woman who was exposed to my smell for the majority of the day (wafting over the cubicle wall) started to talk to me. She’s the barbie that I work with. She started talking to me about her trips abroad and her brother’s girlfriend and all sorts of other things. I have the feeling that she isn’t the best conversationalist, or perhaps we don’t fit very well together, but she makes the effort. I don’t think she is doing so entirely to be polite, either. She casually mentioned that she is taking some people out of the office for lunch…
Also, somebody else said “hello” to me today which I thought was awkward. She is a girl from the office. I give her some work from time to time, so technically I’m sort of her boss. It just seemed like a meek and submissive hello. I think that has to do with my personality, though, because I can take a bit longer to warm up to people and can seem cold/authoritative to people who are naturally shy.
I’ve been wearing 3 sprays IO for the past two days, and I’m gonna continue. Maybe not tomorrow because I will probably be in my office by myself all day, but I get a feeling that this has a cumulative effect over the course of hours, say even after the initial application has ended. For example, Barbie talks to me at the end of the day consistently and gets really chatty when people stop by. I’m wondering if she has an urge to talk all day with everybody and ends up letting it out when nobody else is around and can’t hold things in any longer. Or perhaps it is just the end of the day wind-down. Just my two cents.
Also, I randomly ran into K today and set things up for a date next week. Any ideas on what to use with a shy girl? I want everything to be subtle and not over the top. Attraction, but the kind that leaves you thinking LTR instead of something dirty. I’m leaning with IG or A314 here. I think IG perhaps with some IS and/or IO is going to be my plan of attack. My personality tends to blend better with IG.
She’s shy? A314 may be a little too intimidating for a shy person. Is she assertive? I like your IG, IS and IO idea. I’ve worn IS and IO together and other people seem to like it. I don’t wear IShine for me - I wear that for other people. If you say your personality blends better with IG, don’t you think that would be a cool (unrealised) gift for the shy girl? You with IG all suave n stuff; IS so she likes to stay around and IO to help her open up a little. I love IO - for me, it’s what IS is to everyone else. I think you got a great idea.
I think IG is the answer. Of course, I do need to order one of those IG MX packs…
Today I didn’t wear anything. I just plain forgot. I went to the barber today. I’ve exposed him to IG before. Maybe it is just my own personal bias towards IG, but it seems to work very well on older gentleman shopkeepers. I sat down and I got the Don Draper treatment. He cut my hair for a full hour and a half making sure every hair is absolutely correct. I don’t know how much of it is his previous exposure and how much is his own personal bravado, but he is a nice guy.
Barbie apparently likes IJx1 and IOx3. I can imagine her liking a little none because she is a workout fiend and probably is around heavily muscled guys for 2 hours a day.
I didn’t wear anything today, but I realized something:
Barbie is one of those types that doesn’t listen, she waits to talk. Remember that scene in Pulp Fiction where that is asked of Travolta’s character? She just waits to talk. There are two reasons that this could be:
Emotional immaturity/love of self. I find that the people who cannot listen to others are the people most afraid to relate to let people in. It’s a terrible affliction, locking yourself in your own self, unable to relate to others. You feel lonely and desperate to have others relate to you so much that you forget that it is a give and take. Instead of making the effort to relate to others, you try and have them relate to you. Of course, others are put off by this and then it becomes a vicious circle where you try harder and harder to connect but it never happens. I was stuck in this for a little while. Perhaps I’m projecting, but I think there is a part of this thought pattern in all adults, which is why it never works. Besides all of that, some people don’t have an actual need for connecting with somebody on a deep level because they get everything without that connection. Her own character growth has been stunted by her beauty. Why develop deep personal bonds if it isn’t necessary. By the time you realize it it important- oops, too late! Time to play catch up.
Intelligence. This isn’t so much an actual cause, but perhaps the reason for #1. David D. said something in one of his newsletters a while back. He cited a study where they pitted average joes against smart guys in the stock market. The smart guys lost. Why? They were too sure of themselves. Smart people are so used to being right the vast majority of the time that they block everything else out but their own thoughts. The average joes see the tide turning against them and quickly change the game plan. This smug sense of self-worth, not to be confused with a truly edifying and complete self-love, becomes a block in life. They think, “why bother connecting with others unless they agree with you?” Well, life doesn’t work that way and often this line of thought runs into the emotional immaturity.
Now, I’m not saying by any means that I can “observe self” or that I don’t run into these sorts of problems on a daily basis, but I feel that especially in this particular instance, a deeper connection could magnify any attraction I’m able to build otherwise.
I’ve also noticed her hate for silence/awkward pauses. I’ll elaborate later.
I have another option: Maybe she’s so desperate to impress you, that she’s just latching onto something that she can expand on in the conversation. It happens a lot; and girls are taught not to let the silence drag on
“you need to keep the conversation going, you don’t want a boy to think you’ve got nothing to say. Keep it light, boys don’t like to hear negative things and if you say negative things; it isn’t likely you’ll get asked out a second time” -
“you have to be sweet; guys don’t like it when you’re blunt. You have to be sweet to get a guy interested - if you’re not, you’ll be alone” and the ever popular
“don’t get into a serious conversation, guys don’t want a serious discussion. They want a nice, sweet girl that’s easy on the eyes and mind”
This bullshit is still being actively promulgated - by females! I have been told all of the above a bunch of times by a bunch of different flaky fems (who have no credibility in my eyes, anyway) who routinely LIE about who and what they are. Guess what the guys they conned think about that. Girls are still told a whole lot of absolute bullshit about how to and how not to interact with guys. That’s why I’m laughing my head off every time one of those bimbos loses another bf; and why I’m single - homegirl don’t play that. So many guys play into and along with this pathetic game - by reflex if nothing else - thereby prolonging the life and resuscitating this pointless little game. When it should be labeled DNR.
I’m not saying that this is what’s going on - just a possibility of that kind of crap lingering where it’s not wanted. Also, looking at your post, the literacy, the subject matter and your vocabulary - you might be talking so far above her easy comprehension that silence makes her feel “too stupid to hold her own” - maybe??? Are you taking the conversation where a nice shy girl isn’t supposed to go? Are you asking her to think in public!!!~!!!
A deepER connection?! Now you’re just being unreasonable! “Everyone knows () that guys aren’t looking for a connection; they don’t want to work that hard. All guys want is sex with someone they like well enough to keep around. Being serious isn’t a connection and guys don’t like serious so they won’t keep you around” Catch 22. The generalities left over from the 50’s (circa June Cleaver) are still being spread! Maybe a conversation about the value of a conversation . . . . I dunno - just a thought.
I decided to switch things up today because I had some sort of premonition that I should save some socials.
Today was just 1 drop of A314.
Good thing I had a premonition because I had a surprise meeting with my boss in the first two hours. No noted effects, except that I had a more serious tone throughout the day. No jolly joking around with people. I felt like my old serious self, the kind of super serious person that I was when I was a child. I’ve loosened up a bit since then.
I went back to reading this book called “The Four Agreements.” It’s basically a new age book that describes four different things you can do to make your life (and in turn the lives of others) better.
Well, the first time I read it, I skimmed over the earlier mythological stuff. Now I’m thinking that was a mistake. There is a part where it is said something to the effect of the stars are made of (or by) light and that we are all stars and all made of light.
This got me thinking. The nuclear reaction that takes place to give off light from stars essentially means that the photons were a part of the atomic makeup of the stars to begin with. In this sense, it is true that light makes the stars, not the other way around. Of course, if every nucleus is reducible, at least in part, it is true that we are all made up of light. I’m going to reread this book again.
Today I wore 3 sprays of IO. I didn’t notice anything out of place today. I suppose I talked a bit more than usual, but not by a large margin. I just didn’t have the interactions that I needed. I was also only in contact with Barbie for 3 hours. Maybe work isn’t going to be the best testing ground for things going forward. I guess I’ll just have to get off my bum and get more dates with more women.
Speaking of women. I am heading out to meet K tomorrow. Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like this is going to be a date. It seems like she wants to catch up with me instead of see me on a regular basis. It doesn’t matter because there are enough people out there anyway. Either way I’ll just be myself. Who knows, sometimes things happen.
I love that book. Unfortunately in a fit of generosity, I gave it to someone who needed it more than I at the time. So, I have to get it again. Yes, the mythological parts are just as important as the rest. It puts you in the frame of connectedness.
One drop isn’t a whole lot Hammer. Have you sweet spot tested or is this a part of that cycle? I’m pretty certain you will see even better effects at two or three drops but I’m a real slut when it comes to mones. I like lots of it
I understand that it isn’t a whole lot, but I think when I started using A314 I went overboard with two and three drops so much that it caused intimidation with others. I won’t say that two and three aren’t in my sweet spot, but I like to keep things a little more casual/less authoritative than what I could comfortably wear.
In fact, I wish I wore one drop again today, because I ended up in a surprise meeting with a surprise auditor. It could have really helped me out, considering I’m so new.
Instead, I wore 2 sprays of IH today. I should really get into some sort of pattern with my mone usage, but I guess I’m too carefree to craft a plan. It’s a shame, really, because I know by doing this I’m not using these tools to their full potential.
Within the first 5 minutes of seeing Barbie this morning she talks my ear off for 30 minutes and then shows me some iphone pictures of her in a bikini. Then, I didn’t talk to her for nearly the whole day. It seems like she just needs a reason to talk to me, and then it is off to the races. That being said, there isn’t any sexual attraction for either of us and I don’t really plan on changing that. She’s a nice enough person, though.
Partay at the beach yesterday. Mones don’t work well in this environment as others have noted.
I put on 3 Sprays of Ammo and 3 Sprays of IS. I figured, I needed a bit more AMMO because of the competing effects of the wind and the sun tan lotion. Whatever the sun tan lotion would finally let diffuse would near instantly be swept away by the open air.
I can’t say I got any really in your face hits except for one. A drunk friend of mine (who is married) stuck her whole face into my chest 3 times just to smell what I was wearing. The first time she just wanted to see if I was the one wearing that nice cologne. The second and third times were to get a whiff of them again.
I had some decent interactions with some of the women there. One in particular, S, who I haven’t seen in about 3 years seemed extra friendly to me. I like to subtly tease her and give some DHV, that sort of thing. For instance, we went on a brief hike and she was wearing flip flops and she told me that she was the brave girl for hiking that way. I said, “I’ll take your word for it,” which demonstrates my cocky disbelief and makes her prove herself. She followed with a combination of qualifying herself and playfulness. Just playful flirting/laying the groundwork with this girl. I’m not likely to see her again but it is always fun to flirt a bit.
On a more personal level, one or two people told me that I haven’t changed much from the least they saw me, 2 or 3 years ago. That is a bit troubling to me. I always want to be moving forward. I’m going to be thinking about that more in the coming days and weeks.
Before you get into that; please remember: That as long as you don’t seem to be ‘corrupted’ or ‘completely different’ or ‘so much more …’; people are not likely to admit or even look for any difference in you. Above, you state that you hadn’t seen them in 2-3years; how much time did you spend with them all up on this day? Enough time for them to get every single detail of the things you’ve done, how you’ve grown, what’s changed in your outlook and processing?
Just because they didn’t see or acknowledge any changes; doesn’t mean that you haven’t. How did they see you in the first place? Did they already see you as an accomplished person with lots going for himself? Answer that question before you go at it in your own head.
The best source of that information (whether or not you’ve changed) is firstly: yourself - in the privacy of your own mind, do you believe you’ve changed? I don’t think you couldn’t change - it’s the nature of the beast. We learn and assimilate new skills, modes of seeing, ways of processing - it’s unavoidable, regardless of how some may resist change. You don’t come across as the type to resist change - you just said so.
Secondly: the people who have been with you for those years on a constant or near constant basis. Those are the people who see your ups and downs; help (sometimes) with developing new processes; and are there for both disappointments and victories and get to see the development of you.
Sometimes those statements say more about the people making them than the people they’re aimed at. Like those that are close to you needing time to acknowledge a new mone sig; sometimes those we remember well aren’t acknowledged as having changed until it’s more than blatantly obvious - they’re still overlaying a memory onto the current you. If it fits well enough; then no change need be acknowledged and all is well in their world. You still fit well enough to their idea of you.
People in general don’t really want you to change - it’s work to rethink a person. They like to keep you in a pigeon hole that they made for you - forcibly if necessary. Think of the resistance some parents have to their children growing and changing - at 30+ some people still get treated like (and reminded of how they were as) children. Ironically, not acknowledging the changes in themselves, or the fact that the only constant is change.
So, please, before you go to hard place; go to the easy one. Have you changed - in your mind? Did you work to improve and implement those improvements? If yes, well then, one day at the beach doesn’t fill a person in on 2 or 3 years.
I agree completely. I know I have changed, at least internally, but I don’t think I’ve changed enough on the outside. The impression that I make with others isn’t the best impression that I can make irrespective of whether I know them or not and that is something that I can work on.
I think I’m going to use A314 a bit more often. I ended up transferring to a new building where I’m in more constant contact with my superiors so I think that will do me good.
Additionally, I’m also more in contact with women. I will probably slip a social or two in here and there.
I took a brief hiatus from wearing things, as I’m apt to do, but I found a half-full bottle of Mx390 in my 'mones drawer. I used to sprays today to find out that all the shops I wanted to go to were mysteriously shut down. The only interaction I got was at the bank. The teller seemed a little intimidated by me almost. She’s in her early to mid 20’s and I’ve been there before, but for some reason she seemed more serious and less friendly than normal.
In addition to all of this, I noticed that the mix inside of the bottle was slightly discolored to look yellowish. I don’t know if this is the result of storage, as I’ve had the bottle for over a year, or if there was gradual degradation in the bottle of one of the compounds. The scent is strong, but not as strong as I recall it being. It also lasts very long. I took a nap about 5 hours later and woke up smelling that scent.
) that guys aren’t looking for a connection; they don’t want to work that hard. All guys want is sex with someone they like well enough to keep around. Being serious isn’t a connection and guys don’t like serious so they won’t keep you around” Catch 22. The generalities left over from the 50’s (circa June Cleaver) are still being spread! Maybe a conversation about the value of a conversation . . . . I dunno - just a thought. 