How do you wipe your ass?

Lounge
1

There are three main variables in wiping after shitting:

  1. Sit or stand (to wipe).

  2. Crumple or fold the toilet paper.

  3. Wipe away from (start at bottom and move up) or towards (start at the top and push down) the genital area.

There is a multiple choice poll, vote and discuss one or each of the variables.

For the record, I stand at a 100 degree arc with my legs bend, crumple, and wipe away from the balls. Seems the most obvious to me. I always take a shit butt naked for some reason, it feels more comfortable to me.

2

…This is the “WTF” factor to it…

But I’m bored and game, so…

Sit, crumbled, away from balls

3

You cannot be serious. No, no…WAIT, ARE YOU SERIOUS?

4

Yes I’m serious, this thread is not meant to be as a joke. Mickaelia, how do you wipe your ass? I’m curious to how others do it.

5

No, he can’t be. This must be a joke!!:open_mouth:

6

I love it! :slight_smile: Somehow, unfortunately I think he might just be serious.

7

Girls don’t poop.

8

Any doctor will tell you, girls have to wipe from front to back so they don’t transfer and cause Hoohaa problems.:roll_eyes:

9

The strange thing is I wondered something similar. How do you know if you’re doing it wrong? (Provided you don’t smell like poop on a daily basis.) Nobody talks about it.

Me, personally, I use the shower curtain or the inside of the hand towels.

10

I beg to differ girls poop rose smelling gold don’t you know? like the goose that laid the golden egg. :cool:

Hence the terms: Bircd,Chicka and Chick.:wink:

Duh everyone knows that.Gah mikoto where HAVE you been?:roll_eyes: dahlink your ladies holdin out on you you could buy a house but I bet…Shes having her nails done instead. :stuck_out_tongue:

11

LOL, hell if she’s pooping golden eggs I wonder where she’d hide them!

12

… yes he is serious… so glad I invited this guy here LOL

This is one of the most interesting threads in a while for the lounge LOL

13

Taibo, when you say “bent 100 degrees forward”, is that considering vertical to be zero degrees? So if we were looking at you from the side, with your head facing to the left, your body would be in a “four-thirty” clock position?

That’s fucking weird.
But not as fucking weird as this poll! :smiley:

I sit down, scrunch, wipe away from genitals and finish off with baby wipes. Those things rock.

14

Who wipes?

That is what bidets with heated water are for!!!

15

SWEET! Another baby wipes user! I never have been back to just dry wiping! Well, unless I’m stuck with no wipes! Got to be fresh at all times you know. :smiley:

Here’s a question though, why crumple paper? Folding is much better and less chance of it tearing on you during the middle of a wipe! Sturdier!

16

Nothing like the confidence you get from an immaculately clean bum! Started using them when I saw what a good job they did on my baby daughter’s behind. I figured if they could clean up toxic waste spills like that, they could do anything!

17

Not King Julian, Lord of the Lemurs! (Anyone get the reference?)

18

Just got done dropping the kids off at the pool which of course lead me back here. This is how I sit and do it:

DSC01704-1
DSC01704-1479×639 56.5 KB

I always crumple the paper and never knew why, I will start folding it and might get some of these baby wipes thing you guys are talking about. I always grab my balls with one hand and lift them up so using my other hand, I have a clear opening to wipe my ass with the crumpled paper.

You guys are welcome to post pictures of how you wipe your ass.

19

:open_mouth:
I just busted a gut! :smiley: :smiley: lolololol

20

Taibo, it’s the darnedest thing…in that picture it looks as if you’re perched on the edges of the toilet bowl.
Could it possibly be?