OK I know thousands of threads are listed and I have read through many but I need more than just one persons opinion before I become a mad scientist with this stuff.
The story is familiar I am sure.
Here are the facts:
Lately a girl at work has been more friendly and even hangs out and talks to me for 30-60 mins at a time. I have caught her checking things out if you know what I mean. It was so obvious. She knew she was caught. She asked for my number (texting that night right away) and is def in my personal space at times (you would think too close) when around me. Once placing her breasts right up against my arm while standing there. (things like that mess me up, please control yourself you know they are touching me)
Something is telling me she is interested in more but, and there is always a but, she is engaged and has been with this guy a long time. I have kept the conversations real and have not shown a sexual interest in her but use those common interests to my advantage. So what is she doing? I have not a clue and can just specualte but I want to see if she will be more open and see how far she will go. I am too nice but I really want to see if this stuff can work on her.
I would say that one night attraction that you dont talk about and we move on thing is what I would be looking for. I think she is interested in something but what? Lets see shall we?
OK vets of the forum. What do I really need? There is no ice to be broken but I do need her to feel she needs to be closer to me.
While this is a forum about pheromones everyone also has their own set of moral values that they will share, myself included.
I would personally not wear pheromones around her, talk to her less, and distance myself from her and keep things professional. If she is engaged I’m not even fucking with it.
If I were to wear pheromones around her, I’d want to know why she was so flirty. I would wear 4 shots of IH to help her be honest w me. I would also consider throwing in 20 mcg of p74 to keep thing deeper. For me, p74 is definitely not sexual, but more of a way girls can confide in me without feeling a sexual attraction.
Now if you really want to bring the sexual out in her, which I don’t condone, do a search. You will find things like ammo and tuth will keep things sexual, p83 may lower boundaries, and IS could keep things upbeat. But keep in mind, do you really want to hookup w an engaged woman? good luck figuring it out
Sounds to me like you don’t need pheromones for this as she already is showing interest, so why use pheromones to see if they work on her if she’s already showing interest? What good is that going to do but have her continue acting the same way she’s acting now, or if you’re lucky maybe open up a bit more. However, as mentioned why use pheromones when you can have her open up even more just by you being you as she’s already showing interest?
Also I know every guy on here will think otherwise depending on their own values, but if you were to ask me why even bother? What are you going to get out of this but a possible lay from someone who’s already taken, isn’t of class as she’s obviously engaged but showing interest in another guy which is indicating bad juju, and a possible confrontation with a pissed off fiancée. Really, not even worth it. I know that when a guy is horny they don’t care, but you obviously stated that you’re a good guy so if I were you I’d just rather show her that I’m better than that and move on or just keep it friendly.
Just be her friend, but no more than that. She might be “feeling her oats” a little before getting married, but don’t let yourself be tempted. You’re the one who will be the loser in the end if you do.
And, even if she weren’t engaged, if she was genuinely interested in you, but you used her only for a one-nighter, she would end up feeling used, which really hurts. Believe me, I know this from personal experience.
I’ve noticed women seem to get flirtier as they approach their wedding day, I guess it’s the manifestation of the female equivalent to second thoughts and last minute jitters. Commitment is a gamble and I think we’re programmed on an evolutionary level to reconsider things, I know when I have been in serious relationships it seemed like all of a sudden I was seeing more attractive women more often which of course made me doubt my decision to be in an exclusive relationship. Remember that committing to one person can be more of a gamble for a woman than a man as women used to have a lot more to lose so it makes sense for them to experience something similar. It doesn’t mean she’s unhappy or even that she likes you better than him (sorry), just that she’s experiencing temporary doubts about her future. Acting on your own urges, particularly if you yourself are not ready for a serious long term commited relationship with this woman is a mistake.
If you think jealous boyfriends are hostile, wait till you deal with a guy that spent a couple grand on a ring, plus however much may be invested in a new home and possibly the wedding itself. And in spite of her initiating the flirting, if you and she both act on it she WILL resent and hate you for it as her future marriage is ruined, which could strain her relationships with various friends and family members. (imagine you have a daughter that’s engaged and you accepted her fiance as part of the family and learn to love him as your son in law and the marriage is called off because your daughter was unfaithful) She’ll be dealing with all of this, get nothing from you in exchange outside the one or two occasions of sex and she’ll blame you, right or wrong. Don’t think it will be an easy one or two occasions either. I’ve had “booty calls” several relationships over the years where I was very clear that I didn’t want anything serious, and every time the woman was emphatic in her agreement, and every time the girl got emotionally attached, angry at me for not reciprocating and the relationship either had to progress to an exclusive romantic relationship or end badly…this is a coworker, not some chick you met at an out of town club, “hit it and quit it” will NOT be as easy as you think.
Best enjoy the attention as a sign that women in general consider you attractive and keep a safe distance outside of that.
Thanks for all the answers and suggestions. I am not sure what I will get yet, if any for her, but plan on something for the other ladies lol. I know most of what you guys have told me have told me. Thanks for confirming it.
It’s tough but sometimes I have to hear it from other people because when something this nice (not just the looks by the way) is within reach it is a tough decision to turn away from it. This is why I don’t want to initiate that level.
I was telling a friend, who am I? Obviously the other half was able to keep her for this long and now looking for a lifetime. Who should really interefer with that.
There are some new changes for me this year. I am positive and really don’t want that negative thing to happen. We will see how it goes. I know right from wrong but this will be a tough decision if it presents itself.
Thanks again for your responses and if any chapters unfold I will be sure to let you know. I guess its on to the next one.