I recently started a new job and have unfortunately realised that my boss is a bit of a dangerous character.
He has a mercurial nature like an unpredictable dog that will be friendly one minute and then go for you the next for seemingly no reason.
He also communicates a lot of contempt when interacting with his staff and my feeling on talking with him is that it is like having dog shit rubbed in your face and then having to pretend you like it.
Talking with other colleagues I have learnt that he has a long history of using people as scapegoats for the chaos he causes, sometimes even having them fired.
I know I have to get out of this situation as quickly as possible and get another job but that could take several months and my priority has to be keeping my current job until I get a new one despite it being a pretty unhealthy psychological environment.
One of my problems is I am now starting to find it hard to remain friendly and agreeable when interacting with him.
I too have a boss who’s like that - sort of. I mean not to the extreme degree that you’re talking about, still same type of behavior nonetheless.
My advice is hit your boss hard with a respect mix…
I personally use a respect mix on my boss because I don’t want to use a social one and end up talking with him too much. When I wear it he respects me, keeps his head down, and generally only speaks to me when he has to. He is friendly when he says hi to me but almost in a timid way. Before he would bug me, get on my case, tell me I’m doing stuff wrong (when I’m not), tell me to do something I already did, etc.
May I ask your boss’ age ? It plays a significant factor.
For a respect mix, and you being in your forties, you would probably want to try A314, maybe with some Instant Shine so it isn’t so rough around the edges.
Hopefully some of the older and more experienced users will come and give you a more specified mix for your age and needs.
Ok then that’s perfect, yes A314 should work well here.
I suppose it isn’t improbable, however I have found respect mixes to work quite the opposite (unless on women). People tend to be walking on eggshells around me. But women WILL approach me and even get all flirty at times.
The Cttm2 if in too high a dosage will most likely make him target you.
Just got to find the right A314-CTTM2 balance.
I did experiment with pheremones years ago and while there was definitely increased interest from women I also felt I was getting hostility from random men so I have been cautious about trying them again.
You’ll have to solve the friendliness issue first. So I will recommend IShine.
Introduce the A314 later when you think he associates the happy vibe with you. The logic, if he feels happy with you, he might possibly eliminate you from his list of targets.
Then when everything is on a friendly level with him, start introducing the A314.
I find a combination of IJ and A314 helps keep my “mercurial” boss in line.
He now has an absolutely clear impression that he will not pull that shit on me!
Of course this isn’t a regular work combo - I wear mostly just A314 day to day but use the IJ to drive my point home whenever I want an argument or we have a head to head in private.
Well, we’re kinda in similar situations. I’m in my mid-50s, and I use the pheros mainly for work. I’m fortunate in that I don’t have a whacked-out boss, but I do have weak managers all around me. My boss is female and early 30s, so she responds well to my phero use, and the weak managers generally go beta on me when we’re in live meetings (as opposed to e-mails or conference calls).
I would stick with oils rather than sprays. For me, sprays have too much impact too quickly. This has been especially true in work environments, or enclosed areas like cars.
I’ve found the oils work much better in general, and extended exposures work better still. That said, if I have to have a hard but brief meeting, I might add a single spray of something to drive home the point quickly.
I use 4 drops of A314, 2 drops of iShine, and 2 drops of iHonesty. You might want to try 3 drops of the A314. Test it out to see what works best.
With this mix, I’ve had other business professionals treat me like a CEO when I was just another guy in the crowd. But be warned, I’ve had some really wild reactions from women sub-22 years old. If you’ve got a lot of females in your office that are between 18 and 22, you might want to tread lightly.
The A314 will give a status hit, and that seems to be supported by the Shine. The Honesty seems to help convince people that I’m essentially an honest guy and that they can trust me. The combination is really strong for me at work. But make sure that the iHonesty doesn’t make you talk too much.
But be prepared - there are just some people that won’t react to it at all. But that seems to be true of just about every phero combination out there. Your body chemistry, the phero’s themselves, and the receptors on your target, all have to be lined-up to make the greatest impact. That’s why so many people here talk so much about testing. You have to test to find out what mix will work best with your body chemistry to make the greatest impact on the largest number of people possible.
In my experience, when someone feels the need to talk down to subordinates that way, they’re communicating personal insecurity.
If that’s the case in your situation, you might not want to send too many “dominant alpha male” vibes, which would only serve to make him feel even more threatened by you, and make the problem worse.
Dee’s suggestion sounds right to me- start by helping him to feel more comfortable with you. If he doesn’t feel as threatened, he’ll be less likely to try to play “king of the hill” with you.
I know there is truth to what your saying and one way to handle him is to just constantly kiss his arse but that is the bit that feels like having dog shit rubbed in your face and having to pretend you like it. I’m human with my own insecurities and I may react or just not be able to deal with the level of rudeness and contempt one day. Which is why I was wondering if mones could help.
How far do we take this all nasty people are really just insecure argument anyway it doesn’t change the fact that they can do a great deal of psychological damage to other people especially when in positions of power.
I totally understand your point..
Some people are just plain PITA’s all the time.. I’ve never been an arse kisser but I’ve been friendly with people to the point their crookedness isn’t aimed my way… but it tended to always result in people wanting to be extra friendly when I’m not trying to be friends.. this is when I like to use mones.
