it is my belief that the direction is always forward. Do not linger on the past. You must stay aware of new possibilities romantically everywhere. Your ex has made the decision to open the relationship, thus now you have the freedom to put her in competition against other women. This can be towards your benefit, and in her mind you have no fault in this decision. She has made her desire openly known that she wants to be free from any obligation towards you. In other words, she wants to be free of feeling resentment towards you. To the degree that you can eliminate the source of that resentment, your relations with her, and other women, may have potential to improve.
Do not make argument or concern her with the decision to break up. The pattern to maintain is to mirror her. As she pulls away, so you too pull away, and similarly free her of any obligation to feel or act any particular way towards you. You can from time to time re-engage to make moderate physical and playful advances, without any expectation of return. Make sure that what affection and attention you give her fits no pattern, she does not know when it will come, and when your attention will be focused elsewhere. Similarly, other women must feel the same. When your affection is given, it is given as a gift, without expectation. When you lead, she either follows or she does not follow, in keeping with her feelings. You simply affirm her character in either case, no hard feelings - you express only joy for her, and support for her cause. She does not do wrong, but merely acts in her true character.
Right now your depressed mood will kill any chance of romance, both with the ex and other targets. The man must maintain a positive state, regardless of how negative she acts. Your power lies in gaining control over your own emotions and behaviors. In breaking your patterns of thought. Statistically, it is the male’s positive outlook and affirmative behavior that guides any relationship status, as it is the male’s role to guide. As with all women of romantic interest, whom you should all treat the same; do not burden them with obligations to treat you any particular way or provide for you. They do such things only out of love, never out of obligation. Always start any conversation with affirmations to their character, such that you are not a threat to their sense of self. Then provide a guiding direction to their behavior and activity. Plan and strategize, but say as little as possible other than to provide direction. Do not be an open book - you do not want them to find you too predictable. The women you engage are not obligated to cooperate with your plan. They follow only out of expression of love which is existing in their true character. By freeing them of obligation, you steer them clear of any possibility for resentment towards you.
Do not waste any breath trying to tell her what is true. The more you try to get someone to realize the truth, the less they will understand it. The more you argue and press your case for a particular viewpoint, the more unsure or op positional she will become. She will only dig in her heels and become trapped in an alternative viewpoint. What is true is demonstrated in action, and experienced first hand. Arguing is only useful when you are caught in a lie. Argument is only useful to provide uncertainty, where someone comes to realize a truth that is inconvenient to you. Then in arguing and pressing, you can make them uncertain.
She will see truth in your affection only when she sees you are NOT depressed by her behavior, no matter how she behaves. Love is not about control. Rather, love is an expression of joy regarding the character of another. Not when she does what you want her to, but when she is making her own choices. Other men might judge her, but never you. You only affirm her feelings and choices and her true character. How you really feel, and what you might do next, she should not ever be quite sure. Other men might obligate her and thus garner her resentment, but never you. You free her of resentful obligations, leaving only a path of true loving expression. It is a path taken by a woman only by her choice. Truth exists only in actions, never in words. She can not be told what to do, and certainly not told how to feel. She can only be invited to join you in a plan which she can not predict - thus she has but one option, and that is to follow your lead.
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