There’s this girl I have a MAJOR crush on who works at a comic book store. Over the past couple of months I’ve stopped in & chatted with her. Always with the intention of asking her out down the line. It’s actually been a classic romantic little… thing. Much like when Rocky would stop in the pet store to see Adrianne. While we have good conversation, I can tell she’s shy & nervous. As I ask her questions she has a look on her face like I’m pointing a gun at her head. For only a microsecond. And there’s a bit of a pause before she does respond. I know these traits b/c I used to be very very shy & nervous.
I’ve also said “no” to a lot things out of shyness & nervousness that I really did want to do. So what I want to try to do is avoid that type of “no” from her. The art company I work for is putting on an opening this Saturday. I want to go in the comic shop on Thursday & ask her out. So my questions are:
Should I even ask, or continue on with a progressive sorta relationship then ask her out to something smaller?
HOW do I ask a shy girl out? I’ve gotten rid of most of my shyness & I’ve become really good at asking a gal out, but not in this sort of scenario.
And of course, WHAT DO I WEAR?? Personally, I’ve found that I almost repel people with the A314. I’ve been wearing a steady dose of 1 part TUTH, 2 parts IH & that worked really well. In fact, when I wavered from that with just Instant Gentleman I seemed to get less out of her. Feel free to recommend ANY pheros.
Well since you can get her to talk to you IH is a good one to wear! As far as asking her out, I would open up a conversation get talking and close with getting her phone number, once you have it call her the next day or you can wait a day or two. You can text her too but I would call, start up a convo and lead into asking her if she is free (whatever day you want) such as Friday if she says yes, then you know what to do from there. Pretty simple really, just be confident, don’t cross your arms, I would recommend putting your thumbs in your back pockets to show you are open (crossed arms seem to display that you are defensive) head held high, don’t look at the floor. In short just be confident and you will be fine. And DO NOT OPEN WITH TRYING TO GET HER NUMBER!!! If her guard is up she will deny you.
I like the body language tips. Will definitely throw those in.
But I feel like I should have something to offer up when asking her out. Like, a specific event or just an idea in mind (movie, etc). To be honest, I’ve never ever asked a girl for her phone number, straight up. For me it’s always been, “Hey wanna go [insert activity here]?”. Then the phone number followed only b/c it just makes sense.
Well I am going from the perspective of a PUA here since I have been taking courses on how to be a master PUA lol, generally you always close your first conversation with a girl you like with either a phone number or kiss close. Try wearing some IShine to lighten things up a bit and drop the TUTH and maybe use AMMO if you have some when trying to get her number. TUTH may be too much to start out with and making her close her-self more.
You could close by giving her you number. Just say “Hey here is my number if you wanna do something some time” or something simple like that, not really much to it.
I don’t know, this really isn’t the type of thing where she’s just ANY girl to be picked up. There’s a build up of casual conversation, getting to know here, etc. I wanna keep coming in too. It has to be played a little carefully than a standard, “Hey, here’s my #”. I know how to ask a girl out, generally. But this isn’t a general situation.
Well you don’t have to exchange numbers then, just ask her if she is busy on so and so day, if the response is no then ask her if she wants to do something. Just make sure to get her guard down, the body language stuff I told you will help with that generally if your relaxed she will unintentionally mimic. I would do some observations for a few days really look for IOI’s when you are having general conversation with her and even when your just in the store, that way you decrease your chances of failing, getting her to laugh and relating with her is the best way to get her to open herself up, and watch her body language, really good way of telling when she is starting to relax. Also she is just ANY girl, by singling her out and putting her on a pedestal you are setting your self up for failure. One key thing I learned is not to over load them with complements, don’t keep telling her how great she is and pretty she is, blah blah blah, they begin to think they can’t live up to it causing LMR because they crack with all the pressure you are putting on them.
Don’t get hung up in all that PUA stuff. Just be genuine.
You want to take her to an art opening. So ask her what kind of art she likes. Then ask her if she likes the kind of art that’s going to be on display. Then say, “Hey, I’m going to this art opening and I think you’d really like it. Can I bring you along with me?”
If it was up to me i would go for IO.
Just talk ask her tel number and call her.
IH is a good one for the first date.
Don’t use none or rone.
You don’t need them right now.
You can use some IS if you like it.
Beautiful! That’s the advice I’m looking for! That little key that’s been eluding me. “So what other kinds of art do you like?” So beautifully simple. And it fits wonderfully b/c she almost has to be into art if she works at a comic book store. 95% of our conversations have been comic book related. Thanks again.
I should have also mentioned that I asked her if she could recommend anything. The proceeded to buy what she showed me. That gives me another conversation piece, but again, I’ve been racking my brain as how to bridge the gap from the comic books store to the rest of the world.
I only skimmed the other comments, but TUTH with a shy girl is going to kill you. Why would you even wear that while trying to pick up a shy girl?
TUTH is supposed to send off a “this is a sexual guy, and he wants to fuck you right now” vibe. Do that with a shy girl, or most girls unless they’re REALLY into you, and she will think you’re just asking her out to get laid.
Stop wearing TUTH for everyday things. use ammo instead. TUTH is for when you have a horny girl and want to push her over the edge. Or when you have an established girl and plan to make a move.
What i’ve said here is based off the theoretical knowledge of TUTH. I haven’t used it enough to confirm that’s how it works, but I’m going off what the description is, and what others have described its effects as.
Wearing TUTH is best in situations where sex is on the immediate agenda and everybody knows it or with an established partner. Wearing it to meet people is mainly doomed to failure, especially with younger women (teens-early 20s) in a more sexually sedate environment - Its about as bad as walking-up to her with your cock out!
However, if you have approached her with TUTH - and 1 TUTH/2 IH is a fairly good moderating ratio, it may be that despite her shyness, we have one of the exceptions here?
Does the OP have any IS he could throw into the mix?
It’s a scientific fact that shyness in women is strongly related to cock-hungriness. Showing your cock to a shy girl is like dripping blood into shark-infested waters. Try it and see!
I’ve only been going about once every other week. And I didn’t have the immediate impression that she was shy. Just a super super super hot girl. So when I decided that I liked her I didn’t really have any set perception of her general attitude. I only got the shyness thing over time.
One thing I like to do as add just a touch of TUTH to either IG or IH. I said the ratio was 1 to 2, but it’s probably closer to 1 to 3 or 4. To just add that bit of sexuality. For her to see me that way & maybe even think of me that way after I’ve walked away. And overall it seemed to work. (I wont use AMMO, I HATE the smell & have turned ppl off with just the scent). And mobocaster, I do NOT have IS That seems a no brainer…
Tomorrow is the big day! With Mr. Dbot’s stellar advice I feel really great about it. Not so much a “yes”, but my biggest worry was putting myself out there in a way that, if I got a no, I couldn’t feel great about coming back & trying again. I think with the subtle question & leading into it I can word it in a way that even if she says no or simply can’t, I can still work with her. Thanks again, dude.
Well there is a post some where on here by tish, pretty much saying that when a girl says know it just means “I don’t want to” it doesn’t mean they aren’t attracted to you or don’t like you so trying again is always an option if you get an initial no. Like you said just slowly lead into it so she lets her guard down, it will give you better chances, keep an eye on her body language to tell when she is less defensive. BL is just as important as verbal communication!
That seems a no brainer…