Hi people
I have been working temporarily for about 6 weeks within a 3 month contract. I have been using pheromones ranging from A314 mixed with a social to IG and other socials.
I have been confident, positive and friendly on a consistant basis.
I work in a team of about 8 people. Over the past week I have felt some tension between me and the line manager of the team. I think he sees me as some kind of threat. Maybe he feels insecure due to my alpha vibe from the A314. He never involves me in conversation within the group.
Has anyone got any advice? I will continue to use the pheromones and be positive and confident and ignore the negative vibe he is giving out.
not only he is threatened, but he feels dubious. With A314, you are sending a message that you are “THE MAN” and can take care of whatever problems or obstacles the company is encountering or would encounter. Additionally, you send out a vibe that you deserve respect and everyone should look up to you and follow you, since you are all that.
If you are not doing anything to prove you deserve that much accolade and giving out such VERY BOSSY vibe, of course, the boss would be upset.
The best analogy would be like Terrel Owens or Allen Iverson, who are pretty good football and basketball players respectively, thinking they are the best ones and deserve all the credit. They think all the team members should bow down to them because they are da bombs. A314 does kind of send that kind of message. Yet, they can’t even win a championship.
No wonder coaches, owners, fans all get sick and tire of them and resent them.
Unless you can back up and prove you are A314 worthy, you will get that type of discontent and disapproval from others, esp higher ups.
You want to be their equals and be in their league, but do you really deserve it or prove you are worthy of that admiration?
This fits with a handful of experiences I’ve had with A314. After about a week of constant and consistent exposure (A314 is powerful but slow starting) the owner took to questioning me about problems that were technically other peoples responsibility and would seem quite annoyed if I reminded him of that.
Basically I got the impression that he expected me to step up to the plate and take responsibility of the office as if it were mine for the taking…So I have been.
Now when something goes wrong and he asks me “Why is this happening this way?”
Instead of saying “Ask so and so, that’s their job” I say “I think it has to do with this, this, this and this, I’ll talk to so and so and see what we can work out but I need the green light to do whatever needs to be done” He seems much happier that way.
Well, you seem to have that tough, self-imposing personality of A314. I can make it work well too, but it depends on the environment. I generally don’t like to wear it in front of my friends or peers. I like being that laid back, cool, smooth, sexy man that girls dig ( hence AMMO. Sometimes, I like IG too) than being that macho, baddest kid in school both boys AND girls look up to. I do like A314 when I go out to eat or shopping sometimes, but I definitely leave it out for school, socializing or meeting girls for FUN.
With A314 comes much respect and admiration, but also much higher expectation and responsibility. It is a tough shoes to fill. Once, people lose respect w/ ur wearing A314, man… it will be a tough road to climb out of, in terms of others thinking higher of you. Used when you know you will be at your best, or else, you bring shame to guys like Clint Eastwood
I use A314 regularly at work, when I do seminars, and when out and about. I wear three to four drops at work. Only one when going out.
Three at work puts a damper on unstable clients who like to intimidate the meeker employees. I only need to simply be present and they’ll back down to my staff. It was somewhat like that before…now its like taking a Firetruck hose to a fire. Its out before it even starts really. I love the stuff.
Sounds like there’s some psychological friction that might be caused by the alpha vibes of the A314 as others have said. Work environments are all about politics and ego management. Sometimes, it actually pays to step back a little and let the person whose position assumes an alpha role be the alpha. It’s okay and doesn’t make you less of a person. Pheromonally speaking, I’d ease off the A314 and supplement with IG. IG is like A314-lite. It says “I’m a decent guy who can handle my business, but I’m okay with deferring to someone else who’s in charge.”
Attitude also helps. Actually defer to the guy, even if his ideas may seem wrong in your opinion. Here’s another non-pheromone tip that can be of help to just about anyone working within a corporate structure. Pick up “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie. It was written in 1936 and is a little anachronistic in places, but it’s the definitive and comprehensive guide to interpersonal relations. Every professional person whose office I’ve visited has had a copy of that book on the bookshelf. I’ve got the audio cd set myself and it’s great to listen to while winding down in the evening. It’s a veritable gold mine. A lot of it is common sense and may seem basic, but you’ll find that there’s stuff there that you never really considered just because it seems basic.
Ok I used IG today but I still got the same response by the group ie avoided and excluded from the conversation. Is there anything practical I can do to sort this situation out? I think I should be up front and ask what everyones problem is - in a calm composed manner.
The days are going to drag if I am not going to be able to have a joke and a laugh. I also liken being ignored to psychological abuse. If worst things come to the worst I could just quit the job rather than suffer in silence.
Exclusion comes from 2 things in my experience, both linked:
because you are different
because you are a threat
Is there any chance they could see you that way? It may be no fault of your own. In your position I would keep being myself - make cups of coffee for them if there are office “rounds” where people make coffee for each other. Involve people etc. Don’t try to join in so much if you possibly can, aim to initiate instead.
This kind of group that excludes is generally “run” by one person who influences everyone else. Most people won’t care or won’t want to be part of it. If you win them over then the individual who is being silly will change to avoid being isolated themselves…
I’d also go without mones for a while if I was you. It could be you are confusing them with your signature and it’s time to be unadulterated “you” for a bit.
Also don’t quite the job if you can help it. Speak to the HR department. You may be doing future employees a favor. If there is no HR dept speak to your manager. If they are part of the problem speak to their manager. You have rights as an employee even if you are only there on a contract.
Whoa… that’s an “everything and the kitchen sink” mix if I ever saw one. Waaaay too much going on with that. With pheros, simple is better. Stevios’ advice is sound and good. Sometimes other things need to get settled before pheros can do any good. If you still want to try something, here’s something to think about. Don’t use anything with androstenone. Period. Instant Shine, Instant Openness, and Instant Honesty are ones I’d go with, either separately, or in a combo of two. The worst thing you can do in this situation, phero-wise, is to start layering up something so complex you can’t figure out whether you’re trying to sex up a lamp post, or establishing dominance over a tire iron. KISS. Seriously. Stay way from any list that looks like an inventory of someone’s medicine cabinet.
