OK first off, that “ladder theory stuff” get that shit the fuck out of your head right now. I’ve read Ladder/Intellectual Whores and it offers nothing actually constructive. In fact all it is is a bunch of AFC…(actually BFC’s since being average would mean getting laid at least once in a while which these bitter ass clowns obviously do NOT.) Whining about how every reason that “nice guys” can’t get laid is the womans fault.
It’ll make you angry, and if you’re already angry it will make you go “YEAH! Damn right!” and you’ll still go to bed alone.
Now the M3 model is great, it doesn’t make judgments, the world is what it is. However while the Mystery Method book is great for examples of techniques and laying down the basic theory it’s kinda like showing somebody a picture of a house, a pile of lumber and saying “make it happen”. Somebody mentioned Style and I concur. Read Rules of the Game and follow the 30 day challenge. While doing that get the Dicarlo escalation ladder.
Here is a HUGE problem you may be running into. Some guys can open set, create attraction, move into comfort, but then get stuck in comfort and get friend zoned so they get shut out when they try to escalate to seduction…why? Usually the guy was not making enough casual physical contact the whole time during comfort and when he moves in for a kiss or something more overtly romantic/sexual it’s this big high pressure deal.
The escalation ladder shows you how to begin making physical contact in a casual low key way and then gradual escalate in a way that makes each step seem to the girl like no big deal…kino type B is no big deal since it’s barely a step up from kino type A, Type C is right next to B so if you’re already touching her in type B then C should feel natural and normal.
Now try going all the way to F without going through A-D first and it’s like “wait what are you doing?”
And finally, this is most important but also the hardest…let go of needing it to happen. Bro, seriously I can feel your desperation all the way over here, if I can feel it, the women can feel it and while women like sex as much as men, they usually have enough options that they’re never desperate for it…so when they sense desperation, they figure you don’t have any options (and if you have no options, there must be a reason) ie desperation is unattractive.
Try this since you’ve read the Mystery Method I figure you should be able to follow me here.
Consider the four attraction switches, now look at area’s of your life where those apply to you, Where are you a leader of men, in what ways are you protective of loved ones, How many attractive, and interesting female friends do you have to display social proof? etc
Work on those area’s. if you’re not in a leadership position someplace, work on fixing that by starting some sort of social club of your own (meetup.com is good for this)
Go out and make friends with attractive women…friends, getting blown out with one hottie today is bad when you consider YOU can friend zone HER and either look great to other women when she gives you a friendly hug at a party, or even get introduced to the women in her social circle.
Now, work on presenting your attractive traits in a way that’s interesting and compelling (storytelling)
Here is the most important part. Make a list of qualities (physical, and personality wise) that you would want in a woman. Commit to that list…at least the personality and behavior aspects. By commit I mean even if the girl wants to have sex, don’t have sex with her if she’s below you standards…HAVING STANDARDS IS HANDS DOWN THE GREATEST CURE FOR DESPERATION THERE IS.
Stop approaching the interaction from the “I wonder if she’ll make out with me” mentality and instead come in with a let’s see if this woman is up to MY standards.
It takes time and effort, especially during a dry spell but I’m at a point now where even if the woman begged me to fuck her, I stick to my mental checklist and if she ain’t up to the bar, then I move on. You’ll find that it makes you much more attractive to other women that you’re picky…why?, because sleeping with you means shit to their ego if you’re so desperate you’d sleep with anything that would have you. BUT, if you’re the kind of man that turns women away that don’t meet his standards, well then sleeping with you means that they DO measure up.
That’s one of the reasons that rock stars and movie stars get the amount of women they do. You think women realistically think the lead singer of a metal band will give up his lifestyle to give them a white picket fence? No, it’s because they know they’re one of thousands of women that want to have sex with him, and actually getting him means they were chosen above those thousands.
Standards bro, never settle just to get a little action.