Before I begin - I know this is not a relationship forum, but I’d still like to post this, as I could use any help I can get. As it is an Off Topic part of the forum, I figured that no harm can come out of this 
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I’m facing a situation, where I do no not know where I stand at. It is a long story, as I tried to be as precise as I can. - I added a short summary of it all in the end.
A little about me before I begin. (For those who haven’t seen me before, or do not remember my introduction - i.e likely most of you 
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- I’m 28, from Estonia, I have worked as a seaman on different passenger- and cargo ships, and have by now a deck officers diploma, which I can exchange to a license once I get one more month of seafaring practice.
I have experimented with pheromones. None of them from Androtics, though. But I did order (and just received my first batch), containing:
*Instant Openness
*Instant Gentleman
*Instant Honesty
*Alpha A314
*Putative 102
I haven’t tried them out yet in a dating context yet. As I might get a new chance with the girl I like, I’d prefer to increase my chances as much as possible. I’d appreciate any dating advice, any insight into what she might be thinking, and also any advice regarding pheromones. Should I order something more for this specific case?
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Summer 2009 - I’m on a cruise. A girl approaches me. We talk for an hour, part our ways. She seems to be more attracted to me at that time, than I am towards her. We do not exchange contact information. Both of us are likely too shy. She does however tell me where she works, so I could find her.
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2009 to 2010 - I see the girl on a few occasions at her work (she works as an check-in assistant for the shipping company), when travelling. She is flirty, but not even once did I ask her contact information.
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Spring 2011 - I went on a cruise again. As I was about to embark, she approaches me, telling me that she is going on the same cruise. I offer to wait for her so we can go together, but she has to wait for her friends. I then meet another girl onboard (a member of the crew) with whom we have instant attraction. We start talking, until the first girl passes by and joins us. The two girls are friends with each other. The next day the first girl adds me as a friend on Facebook.
*We chatted quite heavily, but I was cautious with her, as I was dating the second girl I met onboard. I asked her out once I realized that things between me and the girl I met onboard might not be working afterall. She(the first girl) did not show up for our first planned date, claiming that she forgot and did not hear the phone ring when I called her. She apologised in every way she could and seemed to be sincerely sorry. We arranged to meet a few days later outside her workplace at the harbour and she hugged me when she approached, and when I left. Soon enough I got confirmation, that the second girl was not interested in me any longer (albeit I did not get the message right away, and tried to make her reconsider). I did, however accept it, and did not bother that second girl any further. Me and the first girl I met chatted days on end. I finally asked her out once more. This time she came and had a really good time, giving me a very big and strong hug when we left. We chatted for several hours, well into the night.
I might have managed to inadvertently offend her during one of the chatting sessions (did not realize it at the time). We had just decided on our second date when it happened. I went to the meeting place, but she did not show up. I asked her, and she just told me that she was sleeping. We continued on chatting, however, but I kept receiving more and more vague responses when asking her out again, until she started ignoring me altogether when she realized I was about to ask her out. We did not chat as much as we used to. (She went to school and worked full time, and understood that she might have less time to chat). She seldom initiated a conversation herself, and did not behave in a flirty manner when we did chat. Sometime in between I delivered her a love poem (haiku) in an closed envelope, telling her not to open it until she got home. Apparently she did, as she initiated a conversation within 30 minutes after receiving it. She was chatting in a slightly flirty manner and seemed to be happy.
Winter 2011 - I knew she was going on a cruise with a female friend. I had the purser deliver a rose and a teddy bear into her cabin. She initiated a conversation with me once she was back. We chatted all day long (something that had not happened for almost two months). She did not mention anything about the surprise, until I finally asked her. She thanked me, and told me that she was afraid I would not ask at all. - But, I have a friend onboard, and she told me, that the girl was indeed surprised when she saw the rose and teddy bear, but apparently she thought that somebody else might have surprised her, before the purser told her it was me.
Again, we did not chat as often as we used to. I met her once at a party. While she might not have noticed me, she turned away when I approached her. It was only after I called her name, when she turned around. She did not hug me, nor did we have any physical contact. We did talk for a few minutes, and she then told me she had to leave, to be with her (female) friends.
I had planned a cruise in January this year, which she knew about it. I asked her to come on the same cruise. She gave me some vague answers regarding it, but I was informed later on, that she indeed had had a cruise booked for the same day, but only to change the date one day forward shortly before the sailing. She then told me that she had an exam on the day I was travelling. Sometime during this time I asked her, if she was angry with me that I had shown interest in dating both her, and the second girl at the same time, and that I actually did date her AFTER it become clear that the second girl (and her friend) was not interested in me. She told me that she was not angry at all, and even claimed she did not know anything about it.
After that I decided not to talk her at all - hoping that she would herself show interest, and also wishing not to look desperate. Needless to say, the first time she initiated contact with me was when she wished me happy birthday. It was in June. Well, at least she did do so in the chat, not on my Facebook wall. We had not had any contact whatsoever for the three-four months preceding it.
- June 2012 - I went on a conference onboard the ship while it was in port. I was among the first to arrive and picked a seat. As it turned out, there were people from the check-in attending too. The conference had already started, when I looked behind me, and there she was. She was sitting precisely behind me. - I was quite certain she did not want much to do with me, but why should she sit so close to me then? We did not talk a single word, though I had a surprised reaction towards her haircut. She giggled when I looked at her. I later told her in the chat that he had an interesting haircut (I did not tell her I liked it, because in reality I liked her old haircut much more).
I waited for a week, or two and asked her to come out again. She did not reply, and when I asked her a few days later, she said that she was sorry and that she did not notice my message. I then asked her out once more, this time being very specific. Again, she did not reply. (Facebook shows if the message has been seen, or not. She either did not see it, or decided not to read it) I asked her again a few days later, and she told the same story about missing my message. She then told me that my ideas were great, but she had to let me down, because it seemed like I was asking her on a date. I then wrote her a longer message, noting my suspicions that I had inadvertently offender her just days after our first date, explained to her what I really meant when I made the offending comment, and added, that it was really more of an compliment - and it was, just not one well thought through. She did not answer.
I decided to let her be. A few days later, however, I noticed that she either had blocked me, unfriended me, or cancelled her Facebook account altogether. Her profile remained missing for several days, until it finally came back again.
I still wanted to remain friends with her, as she was a nice girl, really. And I did not want to avoid her altogether, as had been the case with the girl I met onboard (I haven’t talked to her even once after she walked away). So I saw a rather interesting picture made of her and published in facebook. It gave me an excuse to talk to her and make a casual joke about the picture. She did reply, but did not talk much herself. It lasted for roughly 10 minutes.
She has not "like"d any of my posts or picture (not that I post or add pictures much anyway), but I did add a picture, involving another girl who was hugging and teasing me. She did “like” that. I assumed only that it was a hint that she is happy that I have found somebody else and I should stop talking to her.
- August 2012 - I spray some pheromone fragrance (This specific was called “Panther Spice”), and quite heavily so, and go to the port to take a cruise. I saw her at the check-in desk, so I went to her to get my boarding card and tickets. This time she was quite flirty again. She asked me how I had been, what I had been doing, and so on. I asked her, if she would be going on a cruise too, and she told me she was going to one at the end of the month. We engaged in some more small-talk, and she would likely had talked more, but I left, and went onboard (I was polite about it, of course, and smiled to her). I figured that if I had a better chance with her if she saw, that my intention was to get my tickets and embark, rather than to chit-chat with her. To my surprise she initiated a conversation with me one day after I was back from the cruise. She asked how my cruise had been, what I had done, and so on. We did chat for a while, continuing the next morning. She did not respond to one of my comments, so I let it be. Somewhat to my surprise she initiated another conversation about five days later. More surprising was, that she asked precisely the same question: how my cruise had been, although I did answer her the first time she asked. Anyway, we have been chatting for several days in a row now. I found out the precise day she is travelling, and booked a cruise for that day, (for Chuck Norris, to be more precise, so she would not find my booking). After all, I would not want to seem like a stalker. Yet, as we chatted more, she even told me the precise day she was travelling(she did not know I knew it already), also telling me that she is going with a female friend. She also entrusted me with some information she claimed only a few people know, I being the only man of those people.
Could it be that she has somehow changed, and has again feelings for me? What effect could the pheromones have done? Frankly speaking I do not dare to ask her, because if I do, it might ruin it all. She might start ignoring me once more. While it may have some stalker elements in it, I am still contemplating on going on the cruise the same day she is. I plan on meeting her onboard, and hoping to get a chance to talk to her in person. Or should I do something sooner than that? Or would my plan regarding the cruise look like stalking and show me off needy?
I’m out of ideas here. I would not have too much trouble of finding another girl, but I have not really had the same attraction to any of them I have met in between, that I have towards her. I do not want to lose her as a friend, either.
In short - Girl seems to like me. It takes several years for us to get together. We date and she enjoys it fully. I inadvertently screw up/we misscommunicate. She is no longer interested in meeting me, but seems to be interested in being friends. About 9-10 months after the screw-up she tells me she is not interested in dating me. Two months - six weeks later - I spray a relatively large dose of pheromones on me. I meet her and she becomes flirty again and appears to be interested in me. She continues to be interested in me and chats with me even a week after we last met, something she has not done for the last 8 months. I’m out of ideas. I’m glad of how things have changed, but don’t want to screw it up again.
I’d appreciate all help and any ideas.
Brush up on body language and throw in some sexual trigger words. Google it you will find some basic guides.