hi, I’ve been using pheromones for a little while now and so far they’ve always helped and attracted people so they liked my company more and more.
I’ve got a little problem though and I really need help, see I’m wondering what I could use to actually get someone to not wanna be around me too much see I’ve got this situation its kinda well a little strange, well here it goes.
There’s a guy in my town thats been showing up all the time banging on my door wanting to go hang out or something and I don’t want him too its been really bringing me down alot and its just draining me completely. I’m not very comfortable around him for long amounts of time and I’ve never been able to handle things when someone just shows up like that I’m nervous and I’m scared to say anything too much and no kinds of hints seem to work well either I feel really helpless awww help
This has been going on and off for a while now and its just wearing me right out and I feel so trapped by this. I was wondering if any of you may have any ideas it would really mean alot to me.
I’ve already had instant female magic on around him and it don’t seem to effect him one way or other whatever I use though I really don’t want it to turn into him being angry I’d get so scared cause he does have a really violent past I’m really intimidated by people like that even when they’ve settled down later in life. I wish female magic did make him like my company less cause it always just seems to make guys a little more mellow and not wanna be around as much.
awww I need help I’ve tried everything else from reading online about how to be really annoying to someone and that didn’t work, I tried eating 20 or so cloves of garlic and all he said was how I needed to take a shower and brush my teeth and didn’t say it nicely either yet still keeps coming, awww help
I’ve read about people here ODing and becoming like invisible, I only been using instant products so far though wasn’t sure if it would work or not.
Dear lady, I will leave the pheromone issue to the people here who are more experienced than I am, but if I were in this position, I would contact my local women’s shelter or anyone else I could think of - local churches, women’s support groups, social services, the police - who could educate me about my options for protecting myself. You were brave to take the first step and seek council here - now be good to yourself and enlist more help.
Agreed. I don’t think this is one for pheromones, this comes down to good old fashioned communication. Do you have his number? I wouldn’t wait until he showed up to tell him. I, personally, wouldn’t give him the news in person. I would call him up and tell him that I’d appreciate it if he’d call ahead and ask if I’m busy before coming over. And when he called I’d let him know, then, if it was one of those instances when I felt like taking on his company.
This guy sounds like he may have some mental problems. Very Scary! I wouldn’t trust him either. Take Izumisan’s advice and get some professional information on how to handle him.
Sheba is right. Forget the hints. Call him up, tell him not to come over before calling. Better yet, tell him not to come over at all for a while and you will call him if you want to get together. If you don’t have his number, next time he comes over, don’t open the door all the way, tell him you are busy and give him the above message. Give him a quick “gotta go” before he has time to talk and shut the door. If he gets threatening over the phone or in person, contact the police. I know it will be difficult but you have to cowboy up here and let him know you don’t want him around. If you don’t do that, no one else will be able to do much as you have not told him to go away. Once you do that, they can help.
Remember - our fears about something are often worse than what the reality is. If you are firm and direct but not offensive he should get the message and leave you alone.
Once you do this successfully you will feel a lot better about yourself and gain more self-confidence.
Desert Rose, as you know, pheromones tend to do the opposite of making you invisible or sending others away. I would not recommend trying to do some sort of androstenone OD with this guy, since he seems to be missing a few of his marbles.
You can use Instant Sexiness A on yourself, though, to feel calmer and more assertive. Calm assertiveness is what you’ll need to resolve the issue. You decide who gets to come over and enjoy your hospitality and who does not.
Sheba’s call-before-coming-over rule is an important boundary to have with this guy. I’d also recommend that you talk with a (preferably imposingly large) male friend or family member about this issue. You could even ask this male friend to have a little talk with the uninvited guest guy.
Umm Ladies, I do believe NBully is correct and Desert Rose is a guy.
Desert, I would get some A314, There is not alot of anone in it so you dont have to worry about aggessiveness. Just keep in mind when you use it to be firm and tell him you dont want him hanging around or coming over unless you invite him. It will up your confidence to.
hey all, awww its ok I’m used to it, Carrie and tisha are right though I am a guy well I think so anyway I can think of a few too many people that known me in life that may try to argue with that!!! lol!! I’ve always been overly soft and sensitive and ever since I was little never was really interested in much stuff other guys were I used to try to impress them I failed badly usually though, lol!!
I’ve always had higher female energy and always felt less comfortable talking with guys of course I tried and each time it would get worse cause can’t connect and don’t like the way they talk sometimes(especially packs and typical guy stuff and talk bothers me) so I would get even more uncomfortable, its always been much easier to talk with women they’re always more understanding and its easier to relate and find stuff we both like to talk about I love to listen and theres always just so much to talk about, with guys after a couple minutes I just don’t know what to say so I just repeat all the same stuff over I don’t like listening to them much either cause of rougher way they talk and stuff they talk about I always felt nervous out of place and uncomfortable around any groups of just guys, mixed groups were ok sometimes though if the guys were more tame kinds, like ones posting in this thread
I’m not gay I very rarely find girls I truely get attracted to though cause well I’m not attracted to the average woman(can become real good friends though ) cause I like same things in women most women like in most guys, of the few I have fallen for they were more controlling and well I guess it was like reversed role they were more like the guy usually is in a relationship and I was more like the woman normally is, not quite completely though like a blend almost. Also I only really feel any sparks for a woman that makes me feel really good and desirable, I need to feel good that way, and one that seeks me out first if I talk to her first I usually loose any feelings that way and they don’t seem to often come later either. So I’m a little unusual of a person, lol!! awww I don’t mind though its like the great philosopher Jim Morrison once said, “people are strange” see he wrote that song just for me, just kidding!!! lol!!
awww sorry to go off topic so much, I hope the thread starter don’t mind, oh wait thats me, lol!! don’t mind me I used a few sprays of female magic before my nap and I’m still kinda giddy still ten hours later, lol!! that stuff is truely instant happiness too I just wanted to share a bit more about me here so you all can understand me more since I am so unusual, lol!!
thanks for all the good advice I’m coming right back to reply to it all I just wanted to post this here first so you could all get to know me a little better, its so nice here its so nice finding a place like this
I’ll be right back to post some replies and share how it went today
Hi Izumisan,
awww thanks for your concern There’s not really anything I need protection from though just someone thats really leech like at times. Its not just me he does this too its everyone pretty well I just wish I wasn’t so enjoyable to be around so much cause its draining on me.
honestly its kinda like you know how you’re around some people and you feel really good and it lifts your mood then others even if you think they nice people can really make you feel down almost like they just drain your energy not on purpose they just seem too.
thanks for your concern though, it means alot to me
Hi sheba,
thanks I really like your idea of calling first. I do have his number he often does call alot first too, I just don’t answer the phone, lol!!
alot of people in my town have gone through the same thing and somehow eventually he doesn’t come like that as much, he always seems to think others will be thrilled to see him at their door glad to have him over type of thing, I guess I just feel guilty trying to say I don’t feel so thrilled, its just it drains me too much.
I feel like I need to find the easiest way to put it too so it don’t seem like anything much at first like one day at a time I’m hoping will work then maybe he’ll get less used to just showing up here that way.
Hi Desert Rose,
If you are a male…I’m going to say sometimes your just going to have to mix a little -none in your stew. The -none is not for him to smell, it’s for you to grow some nads. I gave some pheros with none to my neighbor and my he has been quiet manly since. There is a way about him. He stands taller, and isn’t so emotional.
If you’re a woman, I can tell you I’ve had some psycho violent exes who come to my door to give me shit and I just act a lot angrier than them. First, you start out nice, lthen you pick a fight and blame them as to why you are so angry with their behavior and that is your reason to not talk to them. Don’t even let the thought of them being violent cross your mind. Just think to yourself if you have to you WILL cause some major hurt…(eyeballs and balls).
My dad always taught be if your crazier than them, they will leave you the hell alone. And so far it has work. I have never had a man go violent on me, other than my dad who knew I wasn’t crazy. But anyways that’s for another therapy session.
Then, you pull the silent treatment. Don’t pick up, don’t open the door. Because silence is secret power. It takes a while, eventually their effect on you will disappear. I always watch their body language as I am giving them shit. Once they start to have the nervous twitch I usually change my approach to calm.
There’s techinque called mirroring. First you copy their emotions enough to realize your influence, and once you have control of it you change yours so they mirror you. I do that to people all the time. It’s what makes me boss. You’d never believe I can do this, if you saw me in person. But I can do this to any man, minus serious psychopaths.
The important thing is to be respectful, since violent people don’t have control when someone hurts them. Their emotions are easy to influence. You have to understand their violence is a coverup for a deep weakness. With that understanding you will always have power over every emotionally imbalanced people.
hi Katie,
awww thanks for your concern Its true he does have some problems and stuff I really don’t think anything dangerous could happen though other than me having nervous breakdown if it drains me too far.
hes just the kinda person that doesn’t really understand things well, I’m helping some people move and we got talking and they don’t wanna tell him where new place is cause they said so often they get home he’s there waiting or when the guy gets home wants to unwind he’s there already. This guys certainly no push over at all either yet he finds it hard to say anything to him cause he tends to always take things personally I guess.
One morning I didn’t really feel like going out he just said fine I’ll leave then in a way as if to say for good kinda a moping like way, I felt bad then said well I gotta do a few things first and did go out. So more than anything its a problem of how to handle it smoothly so I don’t feel bad about it.
awww thanks again for caring, it means alot
hi bosshank,
thanks so much for helping me
I don’t think theres anything to worry about with any threats or anything the violent past has been stuff like bar brawls and things like that I never heard of him turning on anyone he got along with or was friends with unless they actually started on him first so no worries there it just makes me uncomfortable knowing about it is all, its hard to explain.
What really worries me though is if he says fine don’t bother me ever again or something like that, it makes me feel bad and I like to stay on good terms with people I just don’t want it to have to mean having them come around all the time like that. I wouldn’t mind dropping by a couple times or so a week for a little while I just don’t like having unplanned company like that so much its really draining plus he seems to always wanna join in with whatever plans I have already and usually its with someone I’m really close to and like spending the time I do get to spend with her alone theres alot of stuff I can only talk about with her really deep personal things and we can’t talk about anything then.
hi kitten,
awww thanks I loved the way you put that about missing a few marbles, lol!!!
I’ve thought of using a few female products for self effects before I’m worried about how it would make me appear to others though cause most people already think I’m pretty feminine if I put it on me though and have cloths over it I’m wondering if it will be ok, not sure bout instant sexiness though I don’t wanna attract guys to me with them, just get the self effects so I can feel better
I don’t really have any close male friends in life I always had hard time opening up or really talking to anyone male I just feel nervous and intimidated its hard to describe, its opposite way with women know me for a week and you got my whole life story, lol!! I feel too uncomfortable around guys though. I am helping some people move though and the guy thats there also has same problem with him showing up!!! I’ll try and see if I can get any ideas there too
That sounds really nice Its been the aggressiveness thats always made me feel so scared to try most male products cause I am really soft and not very masculine in nature I’ve always been very sensitive and emotional guys bug me for it, with women well they always feel more relaxed and comfortable with me of course I hardly ever meet any though cause usually they see guys bug and make fun of me and make me look pathetic first so well I don’t have many friends
A314 sounds like it could really help, I used to feel like I could never be anything close to alpha cause I’m so soft yet after reading some of the things you’ve posted its made me feel like its ok and that I can get more confidence and still be myself too.
awww thanks so much, you’ve helped me so much ever since I’ve been here you’ve been so nice to me, it means alot to me
Desert Rose, I am soooo sorry to have confused your gender. I was just picking up on the gentleness and sweetness of your energy- which in my opinion is a very good thing. The world is suffering from too much Yang so you have a valuable balancing effect upon us all.
I’m worried about all that energy drainage; being a sensitive type, I know how damaging that can be to you. Have you tried Rescue Remedy, meditation, yoga, deep breathing - anything to get your sympthetic nervous system to calm down?
Desert Rose, even knowing your gender now, I guess my advice for you hasn’t really changed. If you have good results from Instant Female Magic, who knows? Maybe Instant Sexiness would work on you too.
One thing, though. I’m an extremely femme girl and I get nervous and worried easily just like you. But over time I’ve had to develop a tough persona that I can bring out when I need to protect others. Whether the person requiring protection is me, or a child, or an animal, or even another adult. I’d recommend looking into the deep and powerful strength to be found in femininity as well as its delicacy. After all, women have to be strong in order to give birth and to be willing to fight to the death to protect our families…
Not meaning to criticize you or sermonize, just wanted to offer that thought because it has taken me a lot of work to get to this point…
hi Izumizan,
awww thanks thats so nice of you to say, awww don’t worry about mixing up my gender its not your fault its happened alot its hard to tell online sometimes. awww thanks so much for being nice to me it means alot.
it really has been draining I used to meditate alot and it really helped me after reading this I really feel like trying to just go to my center tonight and really focus I may take myself across bridge of time just to look through my life I need to so I can sort things out better and really take a closer look, I really need to search myself deep, awww thanks its really something I need right now.
He’s not coming by anymore I guess he don’t like me no more I’m ok though it really was draining it was just too much for me.
Thanks so much for your kind and caring words it really means alot
awww help
