Getting the Woman.

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1

PUA Encyclopedia.

I, and my friends, have taken seminars, went on boot camps and tested out multiple PUA products. Oh the books we have read that majorically are horrible.

I have learned from naturals and I have a couple self help junkie friends who have taken a few bootcamps and are canned material junkies.

I figured I would go over the basics of PUA and expand with additional posts about other helpful tidbits from the material.

A GOOD TEACHER NEEDS A GOOD STUDENT. ASK QUESTIONS FOR INFORMATION AND PLEASE SUPPLY INPUT!

The Structure - M3 Method

The Mystery Method is not the first method. Ross Jeffries had Speed Dating years ago, and David D was around before Mystery come into prominence. But, the structure provided by Mystery is simply the best.

For those whop do not know, this is the Model.

  1. Attraction
  2. Comfort
  3. Seduction

Mystery breaks up those three steps into three sub-steps. This structure is top notch. The problem is, for anyone who has studied the M3 model, that 90% of people become robotic, Mystery is about teaching canned material. Canned Material is great and so is a solid structure, but the problem is, people rely upon the structure and mess things up, royally, Canned material is great, UNTIL a girl hears it, or when you get her she realizes it is not you.

The last largest issue is, wait for it, when you change a routine you change who you project, By using routines and canned material you learn to get the subtle details down, so not using them works.

In short, the structure works, but it must be looser.

M3 shines on high value women (To the environment, think birthday girl) and sets which are groups of people.

M3 is designed for Indirect Opening and Club environments.

RSD - Inner Game Galore

RSD is a method which stems from the M3 method, but does not call it the M3 method. They do shine with some products such as those on inner game.

The co-founder is Tyler Durden, TD. TD shapes his system more so around making step two of the M3 model into ‘vibing’ which takes the robotic structure away, completely. Their instructors do very well because it has the back drop of the M3 method.

The amazing portion of the system used by them is it revolves around being fun, not taking tests and they teach you tidbits of very advanced concepts to shoot up your game,

RSD has several instructors and it includes a few naturals, who learn game.

TD is the ‘badguy’ from the book ‘The Game’ by Neil Strauss. He and TD were students of Mysterys and the three are now on ok terms.

Love Systems

Love Systems is founded by some of Mystery’s best students, just like TD was. The difference is LS is even further into routines on a low level. The highly advanced guys phase them out. They also have a killer line of products about specific issues and they break down their modification of the M3 model into explicit detail.

They have a more straight foreword manual for the M3 model, and also take into consideration logistics heavily.

Where they shine is the Routines Manuel. If you want routines, the two editions of this book has them all.

Other Valuable Resources

I would also consider Thundercat (A different approach as opposed to Mystery, focusses on gaiming solo women); Bad Boy (Direct Game), Vin Dicarlo (Specific Gaming for different types of women and Kino - LOADS of memorization), the book Bang and the Art of Charm School (A few good instructors and a KILLER podcast for free).

Where does this leave us?

Well, the very best guys we have seen, and the best results we ever had, was a very simple approach.

PRECURSORS -

BE YOU. I know, crazy right? But not the normal you, THE BEST YOU. BE YOUR IDEAL SELF.

If you think of the best you, is he 10 pounds lighter? Is he in a suit? Is he wearing mones? Is he well groomed? Is he Alpha? Well, be that guy, Be you, but in your best light.

Now, the actual systems we all have the best results from, is the Mystery Method.

1. Attraction

Attraction. Build attraction. Most guys in the world build comfort first. They ask her sign, her date of birth, ect. Ladies group you with every other guy.

Attraction done first is ideal because it makes her want you, and buys you time to build a connection.

First thing is first, you approach.

You say hello. That is it, it is simple. Say hello and smile.

Get out of your head. Approach instantly, under three seconds. Say hello. It is not that hard or complex. This shows confidence.

You can use an indirect opener such as a question or routine to entertain an entire group. This is the basis of M3. It works, but is a run around, and can often come off as unnatural.

You can go direct. “Hey, I think you are HOT. I had to meet you,” This is an Alpha thing to do. It is audacious. It works best during the day. Bad Boy is the premier resource on Day Game.

The key is be positive, be fun, be louder and more energetic than her. Simple.

Mystery’s Method uses Indirect, as does most PUA material. Indirect is specific to Night Game, Club Game, and High Status Women as Well as Sets/Groups. This is because All the aforementioned are not designed for Direct Openers, Direct puts social pressure on groups and in bars/clbs attractive women get directly hit on ALL the time.

Then you build attraction. You are alpha, a man, disqualify yourself, tell funny stories, and so on. You can find a shit ton of Attraction material. You only use attraction a few minutes. Or, until you start getting IOI’s.

The key is, some hot ladies give IOI’s to mess with your head. So be careful. Once you get attraction, you calibrate and test it by jumping into qualification. (Expounded below).

If you stay in attraction too long, you spin your wheels. I do this all the time. If you enjoy her IOI’s she will begin to think you are not interested or never get hit on. Attraction lasts as long as needed.

Attraction is simply put, Teasing, making you stand out from the crowd.

Attraction never ends though. It is more like it goes normal conversation, spike attraction, normal conversation, spike attraction, the further you get the less often you spike attraction.

Then you get into ‘qualification’ or simply put, you let her know you are interested. But not for looks.

A good qualifier is you ask a question about her, she answers and you tell her you like it. In turn, you like her. You ask her enough questions, or she tells you enough things, that makes her realize you are interested.

The key is to be honest. If you do not like something, tell her. It makes the things you like even more positive.

A key is that questions are bad, unless you really want to know the answer. Statements are vastly better. Lead the conversation.

A key about attraction as a whole is the more you qualify her, the less you spike attraction, the more you spike attraction, the less you qualify. You always do both, its about how often.

Another key is touch. I cant explain touch as well as Vin Dicarlo. He does it very well.

Specific attraction material can be found via google, a short list:

  • Story Telling
  • Teasing
  • Cocky and Funny
  • Push and Pull

If requested I will expand on Attraction material and Kino as and if desired.

2. Vibing

Vibing. This replaces ALL of the second step of the M3 model. Why? It is not needed. Build a connection with a woman. A real connection. No material, no BS.

You continue step one, attraction, while having a normal conversation. You continue touch while having a conversation.

The conversation should go like a news broadcaster. They never argue, or disagree. They build upon what each other states, It is no debate, you do not disagree or debate.

The key is to touch, have fun, laugh, and build that connection. This can last hours.

The key to this is to lead the interaction. When you talk you make statements that give her options. An example is,

“I love to travel. My favorite place to go is Brazil, it is such a different world and I get to expand my work horizons. What do you do for work?”

She can talk about travel, work, or Brazil. It helps you lead the conversation.

It is important to remember in this step, vibing, is to lead the woman. Take her to get a drink (Water), to a different venue, to a different part of where you are. It shows dominance and that you are in charge.

In this step you get her number. You do not ask, say :“Give me your number.”

A key concept for a number is to always get it. You can make plans and then ask for it., Hype up the plans even if they are stupid or for that same night.

Once you get the number, you keep pushing on, you are not done. You still push on for a kiss, a date, or to go home with her.

I often make plans, get her email and or facebook, keep chatting, spike attraction, get her number, keep chatting, go for a kiss.

A ‘natural’ friend teaches ‘vibing’ the best. I honestly suck at it. It is my weak point.

Touch ramps up quick in this step as you build a connection and comfort. The woman needs to trust you and feel she knows you.

You can manipulate this feeling by leading her around, The more places you go the more experiences you have, the more you feel you know someone.

3. Kissing

I feel this is its own step. You need to kiss, break the friend vibe, to stay out of the friend zone. You can do it in a few minutes of meeting someone, as it is NOT A BIG DEAL.

How to do it? I learned to ‘kiss’ by an ex of mine. She would look at my eyes, then lips, and I KNEW it was kiss time.

She would look at one eye, the other eye, lips, back to an eye, and continue. You feel the signal.

Test it in the mirror. It is honestly creepy how it works.

Another system; my PUA robot taught me. It is the ‘Almost’ kiss.

You are vibing with a girl, and say, “I feel like we have known each other long enough to do the almost kiss.”

She asks what it is, you explain, “We pucker up, and get as close as possible, without kissing. DO NOT KISS ME.”

Now, this builds tension, this is push and pull at its finest.

After a few attempts she will kiss you.

It is key to remember a concept of tension in kissing and escalation. Most guys get a kiss or huge or sexual encounter and push it as far as possible.

This fails, you are another guy who wants to sleep with her.

To stand out, and show you get this all the time and its no big deal, you stop. Get a kiss, break it off and say, “Thats all you get.”

It is simple. It stops resistance later on.

4. End Game

Every guy has a goal of sleeping with a woman. Some girls are easy, others are hard.

The only way to figure this out is to do it. Just like the rest of the seduction method.

Remember, resistance can be destroyed the same way as in kissing

The problem with this is often obstacles. Logistics of where. It is the most simple to have her meet you up for a date at your place and have her leave her purse or car, or kitten. Just a reason to go back.

Or meet at her place, and ask for a glass of water or urinate when you drop her off.

Experience is the key to improve here.

The mindset is that sex is used to cement a fun moment and good connection, nothing more, nothing less. It is no big deal, this helps tremendously.
**
Cliff Notes to an Approach:

  1. Approach (Hello, or Indirect Opener) - Seconds
  2. Attraction Material - Minutes
  3. Qualification -Minutes
  4. Vibing (Normal Conversation - Hours**
    **5. Kissing (Or Touching for comfort) - Progressive
  5. At Home.

** Bonus Round - Day Game

I wanted to riff on my specialty, day time.

I LOVE grocery store approaches, mall, school, ect.

Day game, or Street Game, is the LEAST prefered of the M3 method. Although Mystery has and will go Direct, his method refrains from teaching it.

This is fast game. This is hit or miss.

The key is, BE DIRECT. I open direct. If she is walking, I talk loudly and do not move.

She will stop, and either be instantly intrigued as you are a BALLSY guy or be busy or have a mate.

If she is intrigued she asks for your name and boom, into a normal conversation.

I ask her what she is doing and lead her through that task. If its at a store, I lead her to the register.

You CANT TOUCH during the day.

Go on an instant date., You then build a connection, you qualify her, and once in a while spike attraction.

Odds are, if she stops, you made her day, and week. You do not royally mess up with her, she will see you again.

Be warned, 9/10 blow you off. That one hooks and hooks well.

Odds are you are the one guy in her entire city to even approach during the day, it is easy.

Another bonus is something I have fun with, conversation skills. I suck in Vibing, but I am considered the ‘witty’ guy. This makes everything easy. In High School and College and I was n Debate and Public Speaking. I would get thrown into a topic and give 90 seconds to construct a 5 minute speech. No training wheels.

Take a class, be out of your head, and force this.

This is the same reason PUA guys go to clubs, as it is HARDER than most other places but you have an abundance of women. It is training wheels off.

Any chance to jump into the deep end improves you.

Making it work.

You do not need to go out to clubs or bars. But you do need to be social.

Be a normal dude, but keep in mind how things loosely go, and approach.

When I first started changing myself and learning about women, I did three approaches that changed my life.

I was once a 300lb guy. I had a degree in History and decided I was not happy. I started boxing, and over the course of a year lost 100 lbs. I got a good amateur boxing record at Heavy Weight and trained at the best gym in the world, Kronk. I started doing MMA and BJJ. I rapidly improved, but had no confidence.

I was the fat kid still, with no social skills. I did have some girlfriends in HS, and was not a virgin, but acted like it. I became a further introvert.

I went to Chicago to learn some BJJ and went out with some guys. They got me, underage, into a club, and were doing great with the ladies. They were professional fighters, but did not mention this AT ALL.

They were just fun. And dominant.

I got shoved into an approach with a buddy who was married, Matt. He is kinda famous and well known. The ladies knew him, and said I was his best buddy, a straight up thug from Detroit, I floundered. I tried to be social, chatty but it did not work. I realized I was not getting the interested, but my buddies were.

Second approach was the same night, I tried the same thing, but was dominant. More out fo my head. I saw progress, and floundered when I should have started a connection.

Third attempt was a very drunk girl, who made out with me. I spun my wheels with attraction stuff (Or what we would now call them) but she loved it.

I learned more in once short few hour span than I ever read, discussed or watched. Just do.

A woman never rejects you, she rejects your approach.

You must go out and try and fail to figure meeting women out.

Any questions, I love self help and helping others. Ask away.

Well, hello! Nice guy here looking for a change.
Hi there
Need help talking to girls!
Newbie :)
Newbie
2

“Negs” in Pick-Up

Negs are common place in an Indirect Method, in attraction, in a set/group to disqualify yourself and buy more time wit the group.
I would like to expand on Negs in Pick Up. I see a LOT of guys being super friendly or jerks to get women Both are problematic and this time I will focus on the jerk.

The jerk mentality, or all A-hole’s get women stems from the fact it get you laid more often than being the nice guy. While this is true, it does not mean it is the best way.

If you put a woman down, or lower her value while raising yours, you create attraction. An obsession. It is human nature to chase what is better or higher value.

The attraction spike that being higher value creates is enough to get sleezy women. I use sleezy strongly, as it is true. If a woman is drunk, just like a guy, she will settle. A guy who is instantly attractive is a catch for some women. Those women are never high desire women, as maters, spouses, or odds are even sexual partners. They are easy.

In PUA, and in general, you need to build an emotional connection with a woman to sleep with her.

The entire concept that a PUA is just hooking up is false, the vast majority (At least 75%) is focused on created a connection with another person.

So, for PUA, being a Jerk is not enough. Being a dick will get you past the initial attraction states, which takes frankly a couple minutes at most, but will end your chance when building a connection.

Being mean or a jerk does not help.

So, what on earth is a NEG?

The most quantitative thought in PUA is the neg. You put a girl down, she likes you. Bam, you are in!

But this thought is why 99% of guys never get good. It is not a neg, it is the neg theory.

Or, disqualification theory.

Ever notice that when you are in a relationship women are more receptive to you? Especially when with your SO or wearing a wedding ring?

This is the principle behind the Neg theory, you disqualify yourself as a potential suitor, and she chases you.

The Neg is used two ways, as a M3 approach top Push/Pull and to disqualify yourself to a very attractive target. By very attractive, think of a Stripper at work. The business runs around her dancing, she is the lead dancer, it is HER club, she has all the value.

In respect to push pull, you use it to introduce a positive statement and pull it back. Mystery uses: I like your nails, are they real? No, well, I guess I still like them. He uses that line when he knows they are fake.

It makes you not look try-hard.

It is about lower her value as well. She cant take credit for her nails, they are not real. You are not mean, you compliment her FAKE nails, and she knows they are fake.

I use this a LOT with hair color. I stack techniques and line with hair color banter and find great success.

THe other way a neg is used is to disqualify yourself.

Neg theory has been re-named Disqualification theory by Mystery. The best disqualifier is to blow your nose in set with a girl, as no guy blows his nose in front of her, meaning you are not interested. Which raises your value.

A Neg is not mean. You are not a jerk, you simply attempt to lower value.

Every guy uses Neg theory in PUA. They often call it Push Pull or Disqualification theory due to a Neg’s negative connotation, but it still works wonders.,

3

Well, first off I doubt most women send IOI’s when they aren’t feeling it to just mess with your head (well maybe a few do, but your better off without them anyway). Flirting can just be fun dude. I flirt with women I have no interest in whatsoever all the time for fun, am I a horrible person? Plus there are women who respond to subtlety as well as men; not at all. Persistance is sometimes in order here.

I do have a question. In your first post you said you should go for attraction first, then connection, but in the daygame part you said go for an instadate, build connect and then spike attraction? (sometimes). Why does daygame have a different order?

In the post on negs you say you shouldn’t act like your interested. Why is this? If you don’t act interested wouldn’t she pick up on this and move on? I mean why bother being attracted to someone who doesn’t seem to be interested back?

I hope I don’t sound like I’m criticizing your post, I’m not. I think I’ve learned quite a bit here, I’ve always done the connection then hoped that attraction would spontaniously generate from it (the notion seems ridiculous now that I think of it lol). I’d even lose the interest of girls (I guess I should start calling them women now that the ones I attract tend to fall in the 16-25 age range, habits die hard) who would send me even the most overt IOI’s.

Well, lets give this a whirl then.

4

I have seen IOIs get sent out when not interested, so have you.

Ever see a girl flirt with a guy to get her way? Same concept. It happens all the time. Think stripper, waitress or store clerk. They flirt and give IOI’s to gain something. Women do it, as do men.

A woman who knows she can did it from an early age (Very attractive) will do it automatically to get what she wants.

I am conveying a PUA principle, and giving a warning that just because a woman flirts with you does not mean she is interested.

You did hit a key point, some women go to clubs just for validation. They WANT you to hit on them in the environment to boost self esteem.

No women want to go home with the ‘club’ guy, nor does she want to tell others she met her boyfriend at a bar. This is why some women will flirt with you, show interest, just for the fun of it.

Yes, flirting can be fun but that is counter to the point of PUA. Sometimes persistence is key, but it does not help to spin your wheels on a dead end all night!

I was speaking to specifically the rare women who lets you spin your wheels for pleasure.

It is important to look at attraction as a whole. It lasts a few minutes, and women may give you IOI’s for pleasure. How do you figure this out quick? When you get an IOI you shift down into asking personal questions to qualify.

Only would a woman qualify herself to you if she is attracted to you, if not, you know she was not attracted or she simply showed the signs and let you spin your wheels.

At this point, from that type of woman, I will get the clever “If you buy me a drink I will tell you.” response. I most often respond with, “I dont buy strangers gifts” or “I do not buy a woman a drink unless she sleeps with me.” I will say, option B was taught in a PUA seminar and always gives you interesting results!

If she simply will not answer, you ramp up attraction again until you get more IOI’s and try again.

And a FANTASTIC question!

When going to clubs, bars, or at night, or night game, you go what they call indirect. You ask an opinion, then ramp attraction, ect. Most guys use indirect as they can convey attraction and buy time from a woman who normally may not be interested. PUA is designed to help you get very attractive with other emotional triggers, not looks.

Direct in a club is “You are hot and drunk, lets smash.” In your face, and drunk guys do it, so women block it out.

During the day, though, it works. Why? Indirect fails. If you go in asking a question you look like a panhandler. Women during the day are buys with life. That is why so few are interested in talking during the day.

By going direct, “Excuse me, you are stunning and I had to get to know you” works because no guy has the guts to do it, especially when not being nervous. The fact you did it conveys higher value, status and the reference experience that other women respond positively to you.

In any interaction you keep spiking attraction so you do not fall in the friend zone, but you leap frog over that step because she normally is attracted and wants to know about you, and will even outright ask!

Question two is a bit more murky. Negs are used incorrectly in PUA. They are specific to night game and I wrote that post to clarify people who were well versed in them. The principles still apply.

Some guys use negs as pure insults. They are dicks. Most guys are nice guys who use supplication to get women. They befriend and buy them things.

Negs is the answer to the nice guy.

By not showing interest in a very hot woman, she does not put up her ‘bitch’ shield which is what guys call a womans negative reaction to being hit on.

To not get rejected, you use a disqualifier to buy more time, just like you go indirect to buy more time.

It is a tactic to help speed you through attraction so you can out in the work of building a connection. If you are non-threatening, you can stick along longer. Remember, the M3 system is designed to work on groups, so a Neg conveys to the group you are not a threat. Attractive women rarely flock alone. ^.-

5

Day Two

Day two is a term used to describe a second meeting. Most PUA, in fact all, do not go on dates. They call them day two’s. It is to not bne on a dating path which you court a woman and she holds out on sex.

The purpose is simple, you need several hours to build a connection with a woman before sex, a day two provides this.

Other instances Day Two’s are needed are when she is with her friends, or you cant take her home logistically for some reason.

A note I would like to all is that I do go on dates on occasion, AFTER we hang out for a day two, and after I kiss on the day two, so she knows I am not the provider guy.

I take her on a ‘date’ I enjoy, which I will pay for because I would pay for even my buddy to go. I get a massage twice a week )Deep tissue) for work and will drag a woman along because it tends to be boring.

What I do is rare, so keep that in mind. The dating frame is a slippery slope to not getting any,

Venue Change

A Venue Change is used in all game to move a girl from one spot to another. More than one spot tricks a woman into thinking she has spent more time with you than she really did.

In a club, especially, you can drag her to a different portion in order to make her think she knows you better or to isolate her from her friends.

Easy ways to do it? When gong indirect, like Mystery, you entertain the entire group, so by disqualifying yourself to the girl you want before you build attraction, you open a window where you can tell her friends you are taking her with you to get a drink to get to know her, as you have just spent time talking to them.

When not entertaining a large group, and you build a connection, take her by the hand and lead her.

Venue change is also key when taking a woman home.

I tend to go to eat first to build a better connection. To convince her to come with you is simple. You upsell what ever you are doing next.

If I am going to McDonalds I say, “Lets go to eat at the GOLDEN ARCHES! They have the coolest parking spots with A/C inside. Yes, A/C. They have these delicious chicken morsels that they let you splash in sauce. You can order as many as you want! It is the coolest place ever! They also have a ball pit, where you can jujp around and…” Get the drift? Up sell it.

When taking her home it is the same deal. You either have cool pictures to show her, want her to meet your dog, ect.

She knows what is really going on, but if you outright say it, you are done!

6

OK so I guess I should use negs sparingly during the day (which is my main focus, I am so not a night guy, I tend to go catatonic past midnight lol), if at all. Probably only when she is with friends?

I guess I wouldn’t have much of a problem with congruence with direct openers though. I’d probably feel weird as hell going up to some random girl and asking whether shes an iphone or an android girl, and probably come off every bit as weird as I feel.

EDIT: Missed the day two post before I finished typing this, definately will give the whole “Hey, lets go play this game called pool. Its played on fuzzy tables with holes in it, and you use sticks to stab a ball that you try to get to knock othe balls into the holes. I mean it has fuzzy. freaking. tables how can you go wrong?” seems right up my dorky ally.

7

I would stray away from Neg’s during the day.

Here is why, as I have tried it and failed, a few times! If you open direct, you are this confident, alpha guy who goes after what he wants. Then, wait for it, you go backwords, after you displayed interest.

I see it this way, you told a girl you like her and think she is attractive, and you then say you do not want to sleep with her? Or that she is no longer attractive? It is insulting or she thinks you have a motive besides meeting her, selling something.

So, during the day, and/or direct, Negs are a no-no. Honestly, Negs work on very highly attractive girls who just got hit on.

Negs are VERY hard to calibrate. You use negs on gals who are not receptive to you. If she is friendly, you do not neg. When a girl gets cold to you, you then neg.

And I love the pool table line! It is gold.

Warnign for day game, you go on an instant date, and then you make plans to meet up later while chatting and having fun.

I think Verbal Attraction would help you more, so I will riff on that in my next post.

8

Verbal Game - Attraction

Verbal game, being witty, is the most important factor of attraction.

I plan on typing out some good attraction pieces eventually, but first you must address how to speak to build attraction. It is fundamentally different, as you need to spark a conversation in order to buy more time to build a conversation.

The first fundamental shift in speaking is STATEMENTS.

WIth the lone exception being qualification, never ask questions. Even in qualification, statements are superior. This threads into a Cold Read, which is a topic I will delve into at a later time. Questions are bad because you put the ball into her court to entertain you. You must \remember that you should be talking the vast majority of the time until you begin to vibe.

In my last paragraph I used a ‘technique’ called MULTI-THREADING. You layer one conversation topic upon another. This is called many things in PUA, from Shifting Sands to Fishing Lines.

Essentially, you stack topics together to get a girl to talk more. It gathers attraction because you can convey good qualities about yourself.

For example:

“I love to travel. I just went to Brazil for work. They have the nicest beaches and amazing food. And the surfing is amazing. You look like the surfing type, are you?”

She can then talk about any topic you brought up, work, surfing, travel, Brazil, or food. This sparks attraction due to the fact she is attempting to process everything you just said. She focuses on what you said, and attempts to catch up while you are still speaking, which makes you seem higher value as that is what she does with people she values highly.

To explain this principle, think of it as a celebrity coming up to you and starting to talk, going on a tangent about things he hates. You attempt to relate to each point he states, but he keeps talking and when he finishes he waits for you to respond. You feel lower value and struggle to catch up.

Another great verbal strategy is re-directing answers. If a woman asks you a question, give a ridiculous answer. The classic is, “What do you do for a living?” and you reply, “I am an ass model.” It is an attraction point as you seperate yourself from the heard.

Re-directing is also excellent when you ask a question or get her to tell you her occupation via statement. If she says she is a lawyer, you reply with, “Do you miss having a soul?” It is funny, and keeps her off tiler.

Verbal attraction is about being different and conveying higher value. ou want to be an equal, not a stick in the mud or just ‘another’ guy.

Another key concept is to remember to slow down the verbal attraction when you get deeper into vibing.

Be talkative, thread tings together, and keep her chasing you.

Cold Reads

This is a golden tool in PUA. It is great after an opener, or at any point when a conversation goes dull.

A cold read is a general statement about someone. Think a palm reader.

You can call a girl bratty. If she is, she will giggle, if not, she will explain why she is not.

A cold read is used at first to learn more about a woman. You can say she looks like a book worm, jokingly, and she will giggle and refute it.

It is great in sets of people, the classic is “You are the bad one, you are the good one.”

Now, this is where it gets complex, later on you can make deeper cold reads based on what you learn. For example, a very hot girl, when you are in vibing, most often seems ‘bitchy’ to most guys.

You use a cold read on this is, “A lot of people tend to think you are bitchy, but I think you are just a shy girl who does not want to let people in who will hurt you.”

You can be wrong. You can use more than a couple and come off cheesy. The key to CR success is to not react when wrong, let them explain. And not stack or memorize these. For goodness sake, make real cold reads to learn more about the woman.

Cold Reads are best being playful at first, and later on more personal. A good one in vibing is a compliment and a neg combination. You say this,

“Were you a fat kid in high school? You have a great personality that only fat kids develop.”

You can stack that with another compliment and get away with it and not lose attraction.

Cold reads are incredible time fillers when you stall out.

Flirting

Everything you learn about attraction is flirting, so I will keep this one brief.

Flirting needs one tip. When you learn something about a woman, trigger you brains ‘google images’ to pull up what you see that is stereotypical to the trait you discovered about her to tease.

Flirting is teasing, and by practicing the google images trick you can have a line of teasing to last you enough time to build solid attraction.

9

Sub-Communication and Natural Game

This is the MOST important part of game, the part you learn this all for. This is what the naturals have and what makes them ‘natural’ at this all.

I am talking about sub-communication. It conveys all the traits PUA attempts to show.

It comes down to Body Language, Tonality, and Frame.

These are things a natural has handled, and this is one of the few things you CANT just memorize, you must test and learn.

Body Language

Body Language is the key difference in approaching people, and having others approach you.

Have you ever seen the guy with a beer in front of his chest? Or the guy with his arms folded? Or the person with their legs crossed?

These things all say something about you.

A guy with a beer in front of his chest appears shy, reserved, out of place. Arms crossed appears to be attempting to look tough. The person with their legs crossed do not want to take up space, is beta, and is afraid.

This is not rocket science. When you walk, take long strides, when you stand, feet shoulder with apart. When you walk keep your head tilted slightly upward.

Have your arms turned outward, to show the trait of being open.

Never rustle around, shuffle your feet, play with your hands, ect, it shows boredom and being insecure.

Having good body language shows the traits of being alpha, open, honest, sincere, and high value. No need to spend hours conveying this all.

Tonality

Tonality, or how you say tings, is key.

An Alpha man, a leader of men, a ballsy man, speaks loud. He is willing to out speak others to show dominance.

This is not all about being loud, it is how you say things. If you ask a question, you must sound curious. You do not ask questions to just fill space like most guys, you ask because you want to know.

You do not tell someone to do something or get you something sounding soft and weak, you project your voice and say it with authority.

When you share a story, you share it with enthusiasm. Make her want to have been their. When trying to go to another location or set up a date, YOU MAKE IT SOUND AMAZING.

Remember to convey emotions, and not sound robotic.

One key to Tonality is conveying what you feel or want her to feel. You must feel the emotion before she does and convey that it is ok to feel this way with your tonality.

This comes down to PASSION. How are you different than joe blow? You can both be cool, alpha, have tight game, good jobs,m ect., What makes you a unique snowflake?

YOUR PASSION. How does she know what you are truely passionate about? How you say it. It is best to learn how you should sound with passion by watching someone speak who is passionate.

I for example, love Mixed Martial Arts, and Boxing. One of my buddys asked me to talk about boxing when he was hammered, because he enjoyed hearing my passion. It was not what I said, because he did not understand but it was how I said it.

If you can find an Emanuel Steward video about boxing or his boxers, he conveys his passion and emotion.

It may not be true or accurate, but it is how you say it and the emotion and power behind it that people gravitate to.

Frame

A frame is how you see and react to the world.

Is the glass half full or half empty? The half full perspective is positive, and attracts others with good energy.

When someone yells, “NICE SHOES HOMOSEXUAL!” at you, do you say thank you, I love these shoes and am super happy, or curse at them?

It is how you saee the world and react to it which is your frame.

When you ask questions, you should be in a curiosity frame. Same with learning details about someone’s life.

When you go to a party, the guy having the most fun is getting the ladies. He is the party, he is in a fun frame, and others gravitate to his energy and latch on.

If you truely think you are the business, others will, it is your frame. I see it like this, if you see the world in rose colored glasses your life will be much more enjoyable and happy, no matter what anyone else thinks.

Stay in a positive frame to get good results.

Natural Game and being Alpha.

The Alpha man and a Natural are often two words with the same meaning.

A Naturla is a guy who has a good frame, good tonality and good body language who women are naturally attracted to. But so is an Alpha.

An Alpha is a person who is the leader of men, who is confident, takes what he wants, and makes it happen.

The messages sent out by a natural are those that an Alpha would portray.

To be an Alpha, you must be a natural.

You can fake being a natural, but it will not be congruent. You must change how you actually respond and react to life to become an Alpha.

In order to be a Natural or be an Alpha, go after what you want, do not fear life, have good body language, and be sincere. This makes all the other PUA stuff often not needed.

10

Right on. I’ll definitely have to try that shifting sands thing. My wording tends to be more linear, and the example you gave seems more three dimensional. Here’s an example of what I would say typically:

“What I really love to do is collect records. I’ve always loved music, a music pessed in vinyl has more of … an organic sound to them than anything you can download. You really have to hear it for yourself.”

I honestly have no idea how to make it sound more multifaceted than that. I’ll have to look more into that, might ended up having to change how I think.

I’ll also have to give cold reads a shot.

As for my tone, I am actually known for my monotonality. This is probably why some people tell me I’m hard to talk to.

Oh and if anyone ever yelled “NICE SHOES HOMO!” at me I’d probably yell back “LAUGH NOW, BUT THEY WERE A GIFT FROM YOUR GIRLFRIEND!”

11

Diving deep is fine in conversation, the problem is that she may not have anytoing to add to it, or be bored. Later on with a woman you can do that. Some guys do that and it works, just not for me. I start by throwing threads out and something always hooks.

If you are talking about music, multi-thread it within the genera. Example,

“You seem like the type of girl that sings Justin Beeber in the mirror. He just is not my think, I prefer oldies. Anything on vynal has a more organic sound, I love hearing the imperfections that give the music a soul. I still love my Ipod though, you look like an Apple girl.”

Two cold reads, a joke, you bronght up a few topic points such as what platform of music she likes, and you conveyed something about yourself.

She can latch onto any topic thread in your statement. She will want to refute or deny the singing in the mirror line, and want to agree or disagree she likes Apple products. She can take any point into a variety of directions.

When you talk and toss things out, you always ensure they relate to a topic you are passionate about.

Lets say you are a music buff, a movie buff, and love football. When you talk, you can to begin in one of those three areas, and you can connect them with movies about football which have music or theme songs for the teams.

As long as you can link conversation together, or string it, you have an endless supply of conversation at your disposal.

This is why you must develop your personality and horizons to get higher quality women. A MD who is a solid ten will be articulate, wealthy, and in high demand. You cant fizzle out of things to say of be boring. Expanding your passions and what you are fluent in is key to be successful.

It is the same concept of how jocks or musicians get women. They are passionate about those things and always talk about them.

Getting good with women is more so about being talkative than anything else. You start saying 100% of the stuff (Open her by saying Hello) and it trickles down to 50/.50 the longer you two speak.

To get more talkative and less monotone is done by practice.

To get chatty I say you need to warm up. Just let it flow by calling your buddy before you start going up to women, or calling a sex line, well, maybe not a sex line. Too costly.

To get over being monotone you need to find your passion and keep the conversation on it. This stuff all relates. You need to convey emotion. Practice facial expressions in the mirror and fake it til you make it. Talk about an exciting experience. Talk about your favorite food. Something that you love.

The best way to learn the conveying of passion is taking an impromptu acting class. They will teach you how to fake emotions and how to be quick on your feet.

You can watch movies or shows about guys who are dynamic or women who constantly go through emotional states. I would start with a drama or a soap opera. Super cheesy the better, to see how they convey the emotions.

Come to think of it, soaps would help with timing and delivery, as well as take aways. A takeaway is something used to build tension, which soaps do all the time to build tension. Ha! I just learned something.

As far as the shoes go, the reason you take it as a compliment is it shows your life experience.

Lets say you have never been insulted. EVER. Someone insults you, you will have no idea what he is doing, you will assume it is a compliment.

If you have never been complimented and only insulted, you will take a compliment as an insult.

How you react to things shows your life experience, and is one of the things you cant fake with PUA material.

Being unreactive means it does not phase you, which is ideal.

Now, I am a pretty witty guy. I get complimented on it all the time. When I started learning this stuff being witty helped immensely, then I learned how to react in specific situations.

Something bad started to happen, I got less results and more blow outs. The more perfect my responces were, the more robotic and unnatural I would come off, even when I came up with it on the fly.

It made me reactive to what other said, so I could not lead or be a man. You cant play your game if you are stuck in the wrong field.

An example is how I react to insults. Or did. If a girl would insult me, I once said your mom. She woukd always giggle. It was a trick I learned to not sound so rehersed. It worked, until I got the ‘my mom is dead’ from a girl. I would apologize, she would leave.

I would eventually calibrate so I knew when she was lying, and my counter statement became, “You mom is a dead whre who is in he** sucking on satans d**.” I would really say that after a couple beers when out. I did it as recently as last week because a guy was trying to start a fight and his woman stepped in.

It did get a laugh, would open, but, was still not as effective as before I learned anything. I then tried to not be reactive, and it worked. Why does it work? It shows you never get insulted and you are congruent, the cool guy you want to look like is really who you are.

Another side tangent on getting reactive and having the answer is that if you always knew the perfect thing to say and used it you would be completely reactive, not natural, always in your head, not enjoying the moment and robotic, which would make you lose out of great experiences and women.

Last thing is, I tend to get a temper. I am well versed in how to fight and love doing so. When I get reactive I often get tunnel vision and into ‘fight’ mode whic I cant back down from easily, I train myself to be able to do it, so its a hard wired reaction. If I start to react and get heated, things will not end well. So it may work for you to react, I just found it repels women AND gives me a shitty night and I have no fun. :roll_eyes:

12

Talkitive is one thing I have never been. I have no problem opening people, but after a while the conversation goes75 them 25 me if not further. I’ve always been more of a listener. I’ll make comments and ask questions every now and then, and crack jokes to lighten things up if I have to.

As for finding my passion, you’re probably right. Maybe I’m wierd, but once I find something I like to do, I do it so much to the point of obsessing over it, at which point I get burnt out of it.

As for the reaction, I would not say it angrily. I’d say it more like someone would a yo mama joke.

13

So she does the work of the conversation. The problem is she has no reason to vest anything into you. Even if you are a friend. A woman can go out, and get a guy with little to no effort. Go to a club alone and she will have her choice of men.

That is why we spike attraction to buy us time to let her get to know us, and seem like a real and cool guy.

I think you could use some routines. In PUA routines are canned material. You can google some more famous one’s. A couple openers serve as routines as well.

But, I would rather suggest you make your own. Tell a person a story from your life. Roleplay (Great time filler). lay a game.

I have given a load fo routines already, Cold Reading is a routine. Just something. you plan to say to make conversation flow and fill space and time.

I think role playing can help you fill time and get you talking. So I will lay that out in a couple minutes as my next addition to this thread.

As far as a passion goes, if you find something that you can always learn more about and you can meet women doing, you have a winner. Pick going to the gym as your passion. You go to the gym, constantly plugging away and developing. Their is no finished or perfect, so its a good choice. Do not pick a specific video game, for example. You beat it oe get stuck, you are done.

Last point of how you react to situations, it does not matter if you do not say it in anger, you are still reacting. It is funny, it will get a laugh, but wont get you the girl. You reacted to another guys test perfectly, meaning you were in that situation before. You often will not come off witty, but robotic. Now, I on occasion get mad and go alpha dominance and ratchet up to fight, but it is a personal sticking point of mine.

14

Role Plays

You want an easy way to tease? If you have keep up with this project you will know that a great teasing and conversation technique is to use google images in your head in order to have things that are stereotypical of the type of woman you are dealing with.

But this can get heavy and not playful if you do not calibrate yourself to her as you can come off crass.

How to get around this is a Role Play, which already has teasing built in and you can already know what role you want to slot her into and have those stereotypes memorized.

A roleplay is a slot you peg a woman into.

Example time,

You go into a store and try on a pair of hideous pants. You then go up to a cute girl and ask her how they look. When she responds you give her a puzzled look and shout, “I’ve got it! You are my personal stylist!”

You take her by the arm and lead her to pants and have her help you find pants. You then tease her for being bad at her job.

An example of that is you can hastle her on where she got her degree to be a stylist, because she is not doing very good.

Another example,

You are at a bar and meet a girl, in a puzzled frame you call her your personal trainer.

You then tell her you need her to help bulk you up to defend yourself around all the buff dudes in the place.

You can then tell her what type of clothing she would wear.

It is playful and she will chime in. It is different than most conversations, it is fun.

90% of the time she REALLY gets into it. She and you can bring it up in conversation later. FOr the personal trainer, when she gets a drink you call her out for not being healthy and a bad example for her client.

Future Adventure Projections

Just like Role Plays, this is a role you slot a girl into. But it is about an adventure you would or could go on.

The key is to keep it fun and let her know its all a joke.

The example gives it all away,

“You are a cool chick. I want to shove you into my backpack and take you camping with me. It will be great. You can pick berries, and I can hunt. We can snuggle under the moon light. But once you find out I cant hunt, we will start to starve and you will no longer like me. I bet when I am sleeping you will leave me and talk all of my stuff. You totally look like the steal your boyfriends backpack and leave him naked in the wilderness type of gal.”

Remember to say one of these playfully so she KNOWS it is a joke and you are playing around. It will be funny, and get her into a fun frame of mind.

This is a great attraction method and can be a routine you use.

Make sure you do not tell her you are going to get married and buy her a house and have kids in a serious manor. It would be creepy. You delivery must be playful and she must not think you are trying to convince you to be together.

Early on you go light and funny, later on you can take this sexual and personal.

15

I can relate, I still struggle with it sometimes, key is practise, and a lot of it, thing is about being talkative, you can talk about anything, what you ate for breakfast for example, or something that happened while you were walking your dog if you had one.. it needs to be something that YOU find interesting and want to share with other people, women.. the important thing is that passionate feeling you have about your piece or funny story, the emotions you convey, those will be transferred to the other person and remembered, the actual words are irrelevant.

Also very important, is to change topics, so you don’t get stuck in the same conversation, involve her in your story, ask her opinion, what she thinks about certain things etc… the point is to find a topic where she’s also passionate about or interested in, find clues in her responses, and play with those words to find a topic, when that happens you’ve hooked her, and you’ve most likely established attraction - combined with the right pheromone combo it’s a deadly weapon!

Personally I like to follow a structure and forget about anything else, so I don’t worry much, usually it goes like this;

Open
Hook
Comfort
Qualify
Close

When you have established attraction, and she starts talking about herself, that’s where your listening skills come in handy, women love when you just listen to what they have to say (Comfort) - when she tells you specific things about herself, appreciate those things, tell her you like a woman that knows what she wants (Qualification) if she has like a whole life-plan planned out for example… you can close really easily now, I would usually tell the girl that I would love to see her again and continue the conversation or something of that nature and get her number..

I have to stress though that there’s a lot of information out there, your brain gets overloaded from all that info, it’s best to just remember a few things and practise, that’s the only way to get skilled and confident like in any other art.

KIMBA has probably mentioned a few things, I haven’t read the whole thread yet. Hope it helps.

16

@KIMBA: I don’t know man, that role playing stuff just sounds kinda wierd and contrived.

Please tell me I don’t have to say that whole thing at once. The most I could see myself getting out of this would be a “Um…wtf?”.

Something like this I think would go off better:

Me: You seem like a really cool chick. I want to shove you in my backpack and take you camping with me.

Her: Lol…random?

Me: No, really. It’ll be great! You could pick berries and stuff and I could hunt. We could even snuggle under the stars. Nah…

Her: What? Why not?

Me: Well…once you find out I can’t I can’t hunt, you won’t like me anymore.

Her: Nooooo…

Me: I bet you would wait till I was sleeping, take all our stuff and run off. You seem like you would totally steal your boyfriends backpack and leave him naked, cold and lonely in the wilderness.

Her: I so would not! In fact yadda yadda yadda…

Even so, that just seems odd to me. IDK, might give it a shot if I can remember to when I get the chance.

@Still: I know, I think thats what I’m going to have to do. Before I’d just wing it. While some were receptive to it, a hell of a lot weren’t. It wasn’tuntil recently that I thought I might have to rethink that.

17

You are speaking my language!

I want to make a point crystal clear, these are all tools guys use, that I have used, or PUA guys or guys who are naturally good with women. Some will work for you, other will not.

I rely upon a verbal game,. I use cold reads. I use a lot of conversation skills. I also use Push-Pull quite a bot (Not yet covered). On occasion I use Role Plays when teasing a girl.

We use this stuff because it is fun. Imagine using this at a bar or club. 99$ of the guys have a serious look on their face. They are trying to look like a GQ model or a D-Bag. Do they get laid? No, Girls numbers? No.

The guys who is having fun, teasing women, and enjoying the environment is. This is what we are doing.

Think of the High School quarter back. He always was with a good looking gal. He was never single long. He teased and made fun of the ladies. But he got them.

How do naturals do it? Teasing, playing, being fun. Nothing was a big deal, nothing is a challenge.

This is what we go for. I am not tricking a woman into anything. I am different. I am fun.

When you tease, you treat her like no other guy does. You are not a nice guy, or a jerk, but a fun guy.

If a guy hears you doing this stuff he will think it sounds stupid. It should, but it is ‘girl humor’ so to speak. Putting them on an emotional rollercoster that gives them an experience with you they cant get anywhere else.

My examples I just made up. I do not use them, and if I do not word for word. I memorize nothing. I have fun. I use ‘techniques’ like a shotgun. A bunch of pellets go out, and something hits, and I go with it.

But teasing and the elements of it is the most important concept. Teasing includes Role Plays, Future Adventure Projections, Push-Pull, Cold Reads, and Banter. Most PUA topics are just ways to tease a woman.

Future Adventure Projections and Role Plays are different concepts. A Role Play uis using a Cold Read, and teasing her on it for her actually acting that way. Call a girl a princess, she complains about something 20 minutes later, you say, “Jesh Princess, your servants are not here, settle down.” It is play full and she will giggle.

How you said the Future Adventure Projection is spot on, but make your one. Plan a trip to Alaska to become oil drillers. Go in a time machine to figure out how Newton really discovered gravity. It is a reality the two of you live in alone. Create your own little bubble so she is engaged in the fun with you.

Peg her into a silly role, she can be a maid to clean your bedroom, A watiress to serve you cheese and wine, A body guard to protect you from all the man eating cougars, anything playful works.

This stuff makes a strong and unique connection.

I am just tossing out concepts, use what works, discard the rest. As long as you undrstand the formats for these things, and go out and try some, you will realize how and why they work, and choose which you enjoy using.

18

OK. Maybe it because I’ve never spent time in a womans head, but the role playing thing seemed like it would make the girl think I’m off my rocker rather than give her an emotional roller coaster ride. I’ll try to keep an open mind and give it a shot sometime.

As for the coming up with my own stuff, couldn’t agree more. I sound robotic enough as it is with my monotonality, saying stuff like that as if I’ve memorized it wouldmake it 10x worse. I just used your example to ask should I come out and say it all at once, or should I break it up and let her respond after a line or two?

As for being the fun guy, that is something I rarely am. Unfortunately I know more about astrophysics and chaos theory than I do being fun (god, that sounded less depressing in my head). Working on it though.

19

I’d first like to apologize for coming off dick-ish in my last post, I came down harsh.

The point of those speaking styles is to seperate you from the other guys, have fun, and take her into a different mind set with you, away from being serious. A lot of it comes down to delivery, if yuo say it monotone, it would come off weird. It is a way to be playful.

How ever you can say it and get a good reaction is how you should deliver it.

I say it apart, but that is because I go with the emotion of the moment and memorize nothing. Its less abot what you say and more about how you say it.

Some guys will say a chunk of material, take a breath, and shoot more out. She responds but it does not matter what she says. This is the guy who goes off canned material.

I have met one monotone PUA, who makes it work for him. He often sarcastically over-emphasizes emotions a normal guy would make during an interaction.

An example is,

Her: Those are some interesting pants.

Him: NO WAY! You like my pants? I LOVE those these pants.

The capitalized words are said in a raspy, lower pitch, slightly louder tone, so you know he is sarcastic. He does it seldom, to create tension and show he is aware of the fact he does not express emotions often.

When a girl trys to ask about why he is not excited he quips back that he is waiting for a reason to be excited.

I would give it a shot. Sarcas is not a humor that is attractive, but it shows social awareness and that you have a sense of humor, which are great traits to have,

I would google routines and memorize them. Look on youtube to see delivery to see how other guys say things and understant how and why they work. Delivery is more important than what is said and so is the structure.

Another personal story. I am a huge MMA and boxing guy. I lve it, I compete and I live it. I on more than once occasion have had friends get drunk and request I talk about MMA or boxing. Why? I am so passionate they like it.

I had a big moment at a bar with my buddys months ago. We were watching a fight and out waitress heard me explaining wht the men were doing, and what they should be doing. The waitress put her tray down, and watched me explain all of this and she started asking me how I knew so much, it was interesting.

But she could just like me, so another time this occured, about tw years ago. My buddys little sister saw me giving him a lesson a time or two, and roughing him up. She hated fighting. But one nigt we were drinjing and she had too much, she came over, hammered, and asked me to talk about fighting. She hates it, as in cant stant it, wont watch it and leaves when her brother talks about it. But my passion for it and interest was so great she was curious.

I get this way about politics and religion sometimes, and get people interested. They lkisten because I like talking about it.

You do not want to entertain. You want to have fun. If fun for you is talking about the Higgs boson, then do it, You are the fun guy because you are having fun yourself.

20

OK, I give the exaggerated sarcasm a shot. I do it every now and then with friends, but its never occured to me to give it a go with women. I take it the sparingly is key as to not come off as a crass dick?

Any routines that you would reccomend that I look into? Or at least any I should avoid because they’re shit?

And no worries man, I probably sounded dickish myself in the reply before. Can’t wait to see more from ya.