I don’t want to repeat everything I already said, but I’d love some advice. Basically I’m transgendered (people will say “woman trapped in a male body” and such, though I don’t think that’s quite true). I’m pretty comfortable with my role of being “visibly queer.” I did find one other transwoman on here who wanted to use pheremones to help her “pass” better as a normal woman. I learned a bit from her postings, and some others as I have scoured the forums.
However, I’m mostly looking for something to increase my femme vibe and add some sex appeal. I so don’t like picking my guys from the gay scene. Though I note that many “straight” men have been open with me and ready, but I have to keep vibing that everything is okay, and I’m nonjedgemental. This works well enough as I seem to put off a really comfortable vibe (I’m a person everyone will share their life stories with and seek counsel from).
I think I have a pretty good grip on what masculinity and femininity are to me. And I can do the masculine thing, which is like shining sunlight on everything one puts their attention on. But I don’t really identify with that feeling and I prefer not to provide that in a relationship more than maybe 40% the time. I identify with something much more fundamentally feminine, which I can only describe as being like a reservoir (though I think it feels like a void to someone on the outside).
I’m basically fluid in my gender, but leaning towards femme… I like to say, “I’m genderqueer” or “I’m queer.” I’m attractive, I wear makeup, I am 6’1", I shave my head, I often wear tailored women’s clothing, I have shaped my body some with hormones so I’m kinda androgynous, obviously XY, but with an obviously femme name, poise. On my best day I think I probably come off as a sexy alien 
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The women I prefer are usually the more masculine ones. When I can feel that shining warmth inside, balanced with something feminine in someone I think is attractive, then I am interested! However, people being used to the roles they often are, I often have difficulty drawing out this masculine aspect, which I often only see occasionally if I’m dating a woman (if it wasn’t there, I would never have paid much attention to her in the first place). I’ve been the gateway drug for most of the women I have been with, either to being gay or being straight… several, after me, were only with women afterwords, or only with men, after being the other way.
(for that matter, I think my boyfriend in 2008 was the same case)… I’m “in between” and happy with it.
So I’d like to project a way more femme vibe, with lots of inviting and sexy too. I like masculine men and masculine women. I’m already attractive enough that I get a lot of long smiling eye contact and double takes with what I think you guys all call “dear in headlights” from anyone who believes they are less than a “7.”
However, I want to really enhance my feminine sexy aspects and have some fun with it.
Suggestions?
–Jeannine
PS: I already purchased CTTM2, IS, and I thought what the heck, it’s 25 bucks off, I got some TAL based on recommendations to some other people in odd situations. 10 bucks was not too much of a risk on that :-). I’ll have my journal soon here…
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